Guardswoman Natalie Cob was hunkered down behind a fallen masonry rockcrete wall as a group of greenskins fired upon her position. They were screaming, laughing, with manic joy as covered her ears and screamed through the intense sounds of gunfire. This was it, she was going to die, butchered by aliens, her flesh rendered into barbequed meat and eaten by foul mouthed mentally handicapped sentient fungus. What a sad way to go, it wasn't fair, it wasn't…
As these thoughts went through Natalie Cob's mind, the tears of sadness trickling down the sides of her grime covered cheeks; something large suddenly flew through the air with a mechanical engine roar so loud as to seem like thunder. This thing, this vehicle, it had launched itself off a nearby collapsed hive overpass and fallen through the thick white toxic mists trailing from a ventilation port on the side of a massive iron tower.
"Apace ye afread base orks and attend my sodden boots as they bawd and commend ye wanted testicles!" yelled a skull faced yellow armored Astartes riding upon some sort of military bike with an ornate cloak of tattered ork skin waving behind his body. This Astartes, he charged the greenskins while mounted upon this tired vehicle, swinging his crozius like a mace. Broken teeth sailed forth from the mouth of the first clocked alien as a second was fallen from a well placed shot by what had prior been a concealed inferno upon the space marine's waist.
The Orks fell back as this yellow armored mad man kicked the stand from his similarly colored assault bike with the metal vehicles frame draped in numerous purification litanies like flowing horse hair. He then stood up from his black leather seat, the vehicles abused suspension instantly bouncing upward, as this yellow armored monster spread his arms in a gesture ushering forth his coming benediction.
"Ye fags want for gentle intent but knave be thine mere existence! Methinks you gay, and owe no balls… Perchance ye empty pates be prefaced by my steely cock."
The Orks glanced at one another in confusion as this odd power armored human continued to speak in his weird gibberish that frankly made less sense than the average humies, "Whatz you say'n chicky?" they laughed, pointing at the Space Marine while thronging their obnoxious bellowing. And then, the towering Astartes personality instantly shifted from the theatric to the barbaric.
"I SAID I'M GONNA FUCK YOUR SKULLS AND RAPE YOUR MUMS!" before the Orks could respond to the sudden and unexpected aggression, the Chaplain was among them, his golden crozius breaking skulls and teeth into vast swaths of green flowing goo.
"YOUR FACE GOES HERE MOTHER FUCKER!" he yelled, grabbing a wounded kneeling ork by the back of the head, thrusting the zenos face into his crotch plate, the aliens head turning to green puddy as his skull slammed into the yellow armored adamantium, again and again, until his brain had seeped through his ears like some sort obscene paste.
Two more Orks assaulted the Chaplain from behind, "IT'LL BE A COLD DAY IN THE WARP WHEN I GET TAKEN FROM BEHIND LIKE SOME SLUTTY ELDAR BITCH IN HEAT, YOU FUCKING FAGGOTS!" he yelled, twirling around, his long Ork Skin cape flowing with his body as he drew the infero pistol from his waist and shot both greenskins in their faces and furry green nuts. Both creatures fell lifeless to the ground, steaming and cooking, their enflamed balls popping like popcorn, as the power armored skull faced Angry Marine drew a frag grenade and started to slowly walk towards the side of a cowering crawling creature that had just prior been attempted to kill him.
"HEY GAYFER…" he said, priming the grenade, kneeling over the Ork, pinning the greenskin to the ground within a knee, "I HEARD YOU LIKE IT UP THE ASS!" the Angry Marine leaned in closer, his fisted hand inches away from the orks waist, "OPEN WIDE AND SAY AHHHH… AND WHEN YOU GET TO THE WARP TELL THEM RECLUSIARCH MOFO SENT YOU!" and on that note, the Chaplain fisted his hand and showed the grenade up the Orks ass. Green blood pumped from the horrendous backdoor entry wound as the Chaplain shoved the grenade up into the Orks midsection, the foul alien screaming in agony with every vicious twitch of the Astartes wrist. And then, the power armored menace stood up and walked away from the ork, the creature exploding into green goo from the inside out behind him as he approached Guardswoman Natalie Cob.
Just as easily as the Angry Marines Chaplain had become this vicious monster, his personality shifted once more back to the prior theatric soul from earlier, "Prate thy fine damsel for thine menace has been vanquished with due haste. Scape… would be wise," he bowed before her, his greenskin cape sagging over his shoulders.
Guardswoman Cob took a second to translate his theatric ramblings into something slightly less weird before blinking several times in comprehension and simply replying, "Right, er uh… thanks," and then she ran away. The Astartes stood from his bow, waltzed over to his still resting military bike, and once more mounted his noble humble steed, be it the modern rendition of an ancient Terran war charger.
"What man," he laughed, "can pretend to know the riddle of a woman's mind?"
The military bike roared to life, and just as easily as the Angry Marines Chaplain had appeared he vanished into the twisting ruins of the besieged hive world. And so it was… that Reclusiarch Mofo… had arrived onto the battlefield… eager to render a knights judgment with a preacher's hellfire and damnation, one grenade up the ass of a cowering ork at a time.