A/N: Thank you all for your great reviews! This chap is much longer, and I like it much better than the last. It has a lot going on but I like it. Caleb's "Judgmental looks" were more how Reid felt and less reality, he really isn't the villain as shown through this and some following chaps but up until now Reid has thought of him that way so that is how it seems. Tyler Sims makes an appearance, as promised. Enjoy the chapter!

Writer's group!! Fanfiction writers wanted! Check out my bio or annatari.the.writer's for details.

Disclaimer: Don't own it, at all. Lane is mine and so is Molly.

Chapter 7

Nearly two hours and a substantial amount of Scotch later, Reid found himself considerably smashed and intertwined on the dance floor with Molly. She was so much hotter than she had been when she arrived, which was right around the same time Reid bought his first drink.

Her red hair was down and curly. The kind of hair you could stick your and in and not be sure if you would ever get it out again, but something about that thought Reid really liked, or maybe it was the way she was dancing. He put his hands on her little waist and pulled her closer, if not so completely wasted he might have been surprised she'd had a baby only three months ago.

She put her hands on his chest but somehow they ended up in his hair and then she was kissing him and he was kissing back and he wasn't really sure what was going on or what he was doing. But he hadn't been kissed in a long time, way too long and it'd been even longer since someone wanted him like Molly did right now. He realized that the feeling of one person's lips against your own could be magical, but Molly wasn't magic. No, she was more grief and guilt, trying to quench the feelings through pushing her face against his.

She misses him. The thought mixed in Reid's mind with all the other almost-coherent thoughts.

She still loves him. He pulled her even closer and turned his head to kiss her better. She was right, kissing made him feel better. Okay maybe not better, but definitely numb. They stumbled off the dance floor, colliding with some chairs and finally landing on a table. Reid had done this millions of times during his time at Spenser, of course he had been a kid then, now he had no excuse other than the fact that he was drunk and had a hole where his heart should be and it had been there for way too long and he just wanted to stop his own suffering.

They broke apart, both in need of air. This is stupid and immature but totally what both of them needed. Reid even dared putting his hand into her thick mane, finding it surprisingly soft, like her skin, like her lips.

She pulled at his shirt and their lips met again. For a long moment everything faded into the background except for this girl, this girl he didn't like and surely didn't love, this girl that wasn't his. One lone thought broke through the rest and rose to the top. I'm kissing Tyler's girl. But this time I didn't steal her.

Reid smiled against Molly's lips, remembering the girl in tenth grade that had been dating his best friend but he had somehow ended up making out with. Tyler had laughed at Reid explanation of 'keeping her lips warm' and the blonde was forgiven and the girl dumped.

But I love Lane. When the thought of the person who had taken his heart, leaving the hole joined the mix he pulled away. With thoughts of Lane swirling in his mind and all the Scotch he'd drank swirling in his stomach, there was only one thought on his mind, finding her and telling her the truth. He was tired of pain, he was tired of just getting numb. He wanted to feel whole again, he wanted her, he needed her.

He didn't get very far though, a few steps into his journey he realized that the contents of his stomach had decided to not stay there and bolted for the door.

He made it just in time, leaping down the back stairs at the same time the burning mix of stomach acid and liquor reached his throat. He felt like he was on his knees, retching on the old asphalt, for hours, but finally the convolutions stopped and no more bile came up his throat.

But Lane will never love me back. Upon realizing this he also came to the conclusion that he would have to settle for just numb forever.

Weak and out of breath, he crawled away from the mess and pulled himself up onto the steps and sat with his elbows on his knees, aching head in his hands. He felt more sober, he was thinking clearly again, but he was still drunk.

The door behind him swung open with a creak and some one joined him on the step. Expecting Lane, Reid braced him self for a lecture instead all that came was a deep sigh that was much too low in tone to be Lane. The blonde raised his head a bit and turned to see the one person he'd been trying to avoid since arriving in Ipswich, Caleb Danvers.

He jumped up a little too quickly and almost lost his balance. Trying to regain some composure, Reid stumbled a few steps back and tried to from a sentence from his racing thoughts.

"Caleb, I…what…we…I…I didn't do anything wrong."

This left Caleb confused and questioning Reid sanity. The blonde back up again and a look crossed his face that Caleb recognized from seven years ago, a memory that would always be too fresh in his mind.

The look held the one emotion Reid had never been able to cover with anger, fear. The eldest Son knew he would forever be haunted by that look and by what he had done to his own Brother.

Caleb stood and took a step toward Reid, trying to calm him down. "Reid, I'm not—"

"Stay away from me!" Reid's voice shook as he interrupted the dark-haired man. It was then that Caleb remembered hat Reid was in fact, drunk and not thinking right, not to mention the part Caleb didn't know about, the PTSD and its ability to nearly paralyze Reid with fear.

Caleb took another step, determined to get Reid under control.

"Don't touch her or I'll kill you." The younger man sounded even more afraid and even more insane, but Caleb smiled knowing who he was talking about. Sarah had been right, Reid was completely crazy for Lane. Caleb looked at him again and knew this wasn't going to go as planned, but nothing ever did with Reid. He decided to go for anther tactic.

"Reid, I'm sorry." Caleb met his fellow Son's wondering gaze with sincerity.

"You're what?" It was the last thing he'd expected from the leader who wasn't big on admitting he'd screwed up.

"I'm sorry, I never wanted things to turn out like they did. I was angry… What I'm trying to say is that it shouldn't have gone down like it did, we shouldn't have done that, I'm sorry." He waited for a response but none came.

Reid stayed silent, not ignoring Caleb out of spite but more out of having nothing to say. Caleb sighed and took the last steps to close the gap between them. Reid stiffened some but stayed where he was, trying not to look as scared as he was.

"Tyler would want you to have this." Caleb pulled an envelope from his jacket pocket and held it out to Reid. The blonde took it with shaking hands and traced his name that was written on the front in neat, block letters. Reid knew instantly it was Tyler's writing, he's copied homework written that same way many times in the old days. He nodded at Caleb to thank him.

"Reid, are you out here?" Lane's voice carried through the alley.

"Yeah, you ready to go?" He stepped around Caleb and met Lane on the stairs.

"Yep, keys." She held out her hand for the item.

"Why? I've sobered up, I'm fine." His voice carried a hint of a whine and Lane raised an eyebrow at him.

"Come on." She snapped twice and motioned for him to give her the keys. "Hand 'em over." Reid reluctantly gabbed the keys to the T-bird out of his pocket and roughly shoved them at Lane.

-

It ended up being a good thing that Lane drove since Reid fell asleep a few minutes into the ride. Lane tried to keep her eyes on the road, she really did, but watching him sleep was so tempting. She'd always been able to handle a lot going on, but wanting to watch him, plus driving at night in the rain, plus wondering if she was borderline obsessive of her boss/crush was a little too much on her plate at once.

Her eyes kept creeping over with out permission, which meant taking her eyes off the road, which is against rule number one in Drivers Ed. She was still trying to multitask when he started mumbling, which soon led to the tossing and turning that she knew meant he was having another nightmare.

-

"Reid?" It was a voice the seventeen-year-old blonde had never heard before. He opened his eyes only to come face-to-bulb with what must have been the world's brightest light. He closed his eyes again.

"Reid, can you hear me?" He didn't know who this chick was, but she was seriously going to need to shut up, he had the worst headache of his life. There was an annoying beeping somewhere to his right that was just high-pitched enough to make him want to pull his hair out.

He nodded. "Can you open your eyes for me?" as much as Reid wanted to do absolutely nothing 'for her' or anyone else at the moment, something told him she wasn't taking no for an answer.

"Too bright." He found it surprisingly hard to talk, and now he realized he wasn't even breathing on his own, but with the help of the tube in his nose. He coughed and tried to move, and instantly regretting it. Everything hurt and he had no idea why, there had to be something sitting on his chest, like an elephant.

It only took a moment for the memory of what had happened to come back to his aching head and when it did, his eyes snapped open. The girl had turned off the devil light and he could now see that it was in fact as bad as he expected. She was a nurse, he was in a hospital, and worst of all, he had lived.

"Reid," The nurse really liked his name. "Your brothers are in the waiting room, they wanna see you." She smiled, every time she opened her mouth Reid got a huge whiff of her toothpaste. So sugary-sweet that it made him feel sick to his stomach. He shook his head , having learned his lesson about talking the first time.

"You don't want them to come in?" He shook his head again, quicker, faster this time. Seeing them was the absolute last thing he wanted right then. The nurse frowned and asked if he was sure. He nodded again, feeling more tired than he thought possible. She left and he thought about sleeping, maybe he would wake up back at the dorms and none of this would have happened.

Then the door opened and one of the aforementioned last people he wanted to see came in. Reid sat up, wincing slightly when he realized the pain from before was broken ribs. He seriously hurt everywhere, how had Caleb done so much damage? Had he even left a scratch on him in return?

"What do you want, Ty?" Talking still hurt, but he wasn't about to look weak, especially now, in front of Baby Boy.

"I-I wanted to see if…if you were okay? The nurse said you were awake and I just…I just wanted to see? " Whenever Tyler got nervous, everything came out as a question.

"Well now you've seen so you can leave" The reply came out as an angry growl, part because he wanted to rip his best friend's head off and part because he was gritting his teeth in pain.

Tyler closed his eyes the way he did when he was trying to stay calm. "Reid, just don't be like this, okay?" The brunette had always been the peacemaker, always wanting things to be fine, for no one to be angry. He looked at his feet, shifting his weight from foot to foot. "I came in here to tell you that I'm sorry? We all are. It wasn't supposed to go like this."

"So how was it 'supposed' to go? What was the plan, Ty?" His voice was bitter and dripping with dry sarcasm. "For me to die before we got to the hospital or were you hoping I'd lose my memory, no, I think I've got it. You were all going to claim that Chase had returned and brainwashed you. Am I right? Why don't you tell me Tyler 'cause I'm just dying to know." Reid glared at him with a look that Tyler recognized but had never been on the receiving end of. The saying 'if looks could kill' briefly crossed his mind.

Tyler closed his eyes again, Reid wasn't making this easy, not that he had expected him to. "Look, they said that you can leave in the morning so I'll come pick you up for graduation?"

"No."

"But we have to be there by eight—"

"I said no, I'll get a ride from someone else. I know this might be hard to believe, Ty. But unlike you, I actually have other friends. Ones who haven't been plotting to kill me." Reid's voice was stiff and angry and the younger of the two felt the need to try and explain again.

"We weren't—" Tyler sounded desperate, vainly trying to make his Brother understand. He hated fights, he couldn't handle them.

"Just go." Hid voice was barley a whisper now. He had fallen back into the pillows, utterly exhausted and deflated.

"But Reid—"

"I said leave!" He yelled, and with what he was sure was the last of his strength, picked up a box of tissues, the only thing within reach that wasn't attached to the bed, and chucked in the direction of his Brother. "All of you, leave! Go!"

Tyler hesitated for a seconded unsure what to do or say then he opened the door, turning to his best friend one last time. With tears clouding his blue eyes, he said the only thing he could think of.

"I'm sorry, Reid." With that he stepped through the door and shut let behind him.

-

When he woke up Lane was there, as she always, and Tyler was gone. He would forever be gone, Reid had missed every chance to apologize to him, to make it better, and now it was too late, he was dead.

"Are you okay?" Lane's voice was steady and sure as she reached over and pushed some of his shaggy hair from his tearful eyes. Reid Garwin didn't cry, ever. Lane hadn't even been sure he had tear ducts until she saw the reflection of water in the crystal blue eyes she loved so much.

Reid realized they were sitting in Joe, on the side of the darkened Ipswich road. His hands shaking, he reached up and took Lane's thin fingers in his own. When he opened his mouth he realized that his voice too, was shaking. "Please…don't ever leave me."

The words were hopeful and desperate as Reid's watery eyes met Lane's brown ones. The words surprised them both but Lane quickly recovered. She knew him, he didn't mean it the way it sounded. He just didn't want to be alone, because he could never really love her.

"I won't." She then turned and restarted the car before pulling onto the road.

The boss sat back in the worn seat and tried to keep from thinking about the look on Tyler's face when he'd thrown the box. He'd been angry, yes, but more than anything he had felt betrayed and scared. He had wanted nothing more than to never see any of them again. And on one of three counts, he'd gotten his wish.

-

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