Hello everyone, so we finally are starting to get to hints of Clic! For those who are not familiar with them, the flashback is to the day they first slept together. Gosh I really loved their scenes that day. Just remember, slow and steady is my motto. ;) I am also dealing with Jolivia and a mention of Dante aka Dominic, who I am completely smitten with, in this chapter. Know now that Johnny and Dante will be having scenes in this story. Anyway I hope you enjoy this chapter and please don't hesitate to give me feedback. Thanks for reading!

Disclaimer: I own nothing.

Claudia tossed and turned in the bed and placed her hand on her stomach. "You okay little baby? I am sorry about all this, I swear I am going to get better. I will be a good mom... I will love you and protect you."

She then closed her eyes again and began to fall asleep.

"We really are a sad pair aren't we? We have been screwed over so many times we can't even see when we have something authentic right in front of us..."

Claudia felt a sharp twinge in her stomach, but it wasn't the baby, the twinge was guilt. Before her breakdown, she had been so wrapped up with surviving and earning Sonny's respect, she hadn't allowed herself to think about Ric much and the fact that he left so abruptly. If she allowed herself to really think about him, it wasn't the bad times that would surface...actually it would always be THAT day.

"I'm going to give you one more chance....tell me to leave."

"Why would I do that?"

"Because you know the moment we commit to this somebody is going to betray somebody."

"That's a guarantee..."

Claudia sat up, awoken by her own tears. It was funny how her breakdown had brought to light her treatment of Ric. A few weeks ago she would have sworn before God and everyone that she hated the man. He had blackmailed her and stressed her out, and she really couldn't stand the sight of him. And that feeling had come on so quick...because you had to hate him, you were so twisted once Sonny was your husband it became only Sonny's respect and approval you needed. Ric became a symbol of what you could have had, the possibility of happiness. But you had to comply to daddy's wishes. So Ric and his acceptance of you became the enemy. He could have loved you...he could have saved you from the hell you had always been in. And you said no....so it had to be his fault....you had to betray him.

"I think I could have loved him." Claudia said out loud to herself. But like everything in her life, she had destroyed her relationship with Ric. Could anything make him give her a second chance? Claudia looked down at her stomach, if this baby was Ric's could he help her make amends? And if he wasn't? There would be nothing to bring him back to her.

Meanwhile Johnny and Maxie sat in Kelly's, eating quietly and exchanging quick glances with each other. The last time they had been in here together was when Maxie confessed to telling Jason about him trying to destroy at taped conversation involving Claudia. Though it was only a few months ago in some ways it seemed like a lifetime ago. Johnny was doing a lot of assignments with Jason lately, and recently it had become a three man operation with the addition of a hugely ambitious man by the name of Dante Falconeri. Things had been tense since Olivia found out the guy working with her occasional lover was her son and he had being going by the name of Dominic. That along with continuously being tempted by Sonny had made Olivia and Johnny's relationship difficult. As Johnny's mind drifted to the business and Olivia, Maxie finally spoke.

"So, let's see if I can try this again...how are things with you and Olivia? You're happy right?"

Johnny's initial impulse was to get defensive, but when he looked up at Maxie, he realized she really was trying to be kind about it.

"Olivia...that's a complex subject."

" That's okay, I like complex."

Johnny smirked a little, he knew Maxie was going to pursue the information and honestly he really didn't have anyone to talk to about her since Dante was always around him and Jason, and Claudia couldn't stand Olivia. It may be good to actual talk about Olivia for a bit.

"Well, things were nice; we had an understanding. She never hassled me about what I was doing, and I allowed her to vent about whatever or just keep her secrets in silence. It was whatever the other needed to unwind... it was comfortable and pretty drama free."

Maxie shifted in her seat, her relationship with Spinelli was almost exactly the opposite. If he wasn't trying to sweep her off her feet with yet another declaration of his undying love, then there would be drama on trying to balance his awkwardness in social situations when she had to do events for work, or work late. How she hadn't been demoted from junior editor was a grace from God. She really did love Spinelli and wanted him in her life, but everyday the idea of him being the one seemed less and less plausible to her. So thus their relationship equaled drama. She was pulled back from her thoughts as Johnny continued.

"But as with everything in life, all good things must come to an end, and I am pretty sure our end isn't that far off."

Maxie felt a burst of happiness with Johnny's statement and immediately scolded herself for it. Johnny was loosing a relationship that made him happy, that shouldn't be cause for celebration. And even though that would mean he was single, that didn't help her much, she was in a relationship with Spinelli and had in a way chosen him over Johnny... even though deep down she knew she never allowed herself to totally deal with her feelings for Johnny. Olivia had made her struggle easier and she made a choice...but she forgot to get the closure that should go with that kind of choice.

"So what changed to make you think the two of you are close to over?"

"Well, the fact that deep down she really wants Sonny and though logically she knows that will only cause her pain and heartache; well apparently Sonny's charms are unmatchable."

"Seriously? She wants to be with Sonny?"

"I've caught them in awkward...moments more than once, but it doesn't really shock me. I mean I am not going to pretend it doesn't hurt a bit, and I do believe Olivia likes me, maybe even loves me but in reality how far could we ever have gone with it? I am not too far off her son's age, who I now work with on an almost daily basis. That brings the reality of a relationship like ours home."

Maxie reached across the table and held out her and which he took as he continued.

"Original crush from your youth, reconnecting years later...I sure that would be a surreal experience."

"A surreal experience?" Maxie repeated.

"What I can't have a few larger words in my vocabulary?"

"No, by all means a tortured soul with intellect is a very sexy combination?"

"Is that so?"

Johnny and Maxie smiled and stared at each other for a few moments. Once again Maxie couldn't help but notice how natural and right it felt to hold Johnny's hand. It was then that her mind started to drift to how natural other parts of his body would feel and was very thankful when Johnny interrupted her thoughts as he continued.

"I don't know, sometimes I wonder if I will ever be able to figure out where my place is." Johnny was looking down and Maxie could hear the frustration and slight fear in his voice.

"I mean I look at someone like Dominic, he is annoyingly focused. I mean I think this guy would turn on you on a dime, but it is about survival first and then hopefully coming out the best you possibly can in this business. I think Dominic has what it takes to go all the way up to the top. And don't get me wrong, I am not saying I am upset that he could be the head and not me, personally I have never wanted to be a mob boss and I just don't have the drive to do what it takes to stay around a long time. I mean when I look at Sonny's kids...I mean no amount of power is worth the hell they have been through and probably will go through." Johnny paused a second and Maxie noticed his face contort for a brief moment.

"I still sometimes can't believe that my sister and I actually had part in making all their lives, especially Micheal's such hell." Johnny closed his eyes and let out a deep sigh. "I mean it is amazing isn't it how one choice ends up taking you to all the other choices and consequences and you wonder, how the hell did we get here?"

Maxie squeezed Johnny's hand again. "You know when the truth came out about Claudia and her hit on Sonny, I thought for sure you would be dead."

Maxie's words snapped him out of his self loathing. "You did? That makes two of us." Johnny began to chuckle a little. "But leave it to my sister, she messes up all the time and most of the time it is such a screw up you could write songs about how bad they are, but she finds ways to survive."

"You mean Claudia being pregnant?" Maxie asked.

Johnny smiled again. "Yeah, I mean I love her but if you could have heard are argument when I found out. I mean she has done some low things, but using getting pregnant to keep herself from being killed...brilliant and terrifyingly evil."

"That does seem low even for her." Maxie said quietly.

"Yeah but the whole weird thing about it now is, this baby may end up being a true gift, and I don't mean in the way Claudia visualized it. I mean I have seen a change in her and how she talks about the baby. I think she really is falling in love with her child and sees it as a way to make some sort of amends for the hurt she has caused."

Maxie shifted in her seat, she wanted to bring up a point, but she didn't know how Johnny would feel about it. But they had always been straight shooters with each other, and she figured there was no reason to change that now.

"Johnny, I am happy that Claudia has made the move to try and get help and that she is beginning to love the baby...but do you think she can really handle being a good mother, and what about the environment he or she will be raised in? I have heard you talk so often about how much hell you were in as a kid growing up the son of a mob boss, but this kid could have even more issues when you think about the fact that both Claudia and Sonny had messed up childhoods and are almost...what's a word I can use here, intoxicated with the idea of power."

Johnny's face fell. "I have worried about all that too, and I have also worried about the other possibility, fact that there is a chance this kid will end up growing up without his mother at all ."

Maxie took a moment to brush her bangs back out of her eyes. "You really think Sonny would kill a mother of his child?"

"No but he would kill the mother of his nephew. It is justice in the mob world, she made a fool of him in two ways that should never happen...fooling him into thinking she had nothing to do with his son being shot and taking time to get close to that same son after he woke up, and sleeping with someone else; his brother no less and having his child." Johnny said almost matter of factly.

Maxie rubbed her arms instinctively trying to push away the chill that had come over her while hearing all this cold blooded behavior.

"In Sonny's mind, he would be protecting the child from such a vile human being." Johnny spit out, his stomach was beginning to feel queasy.

"I'm sorry Johnny. You have so many things to worry about right now." Maxie said quietly.

"Yeah,but that is the life of organized crime...thanks for the talk it helped, but can we talk about something else now? I actually would love to hear about Kate and whatever latest "crisis" she has you saving her from in the fashion world."

Maxie smiled. "Oh you want me to talk about me, that I can definitely do. You don't mind this being an all night kind of thing do you?

And with that they both broke into laughter. Johnny was so glad for Maxie's friendship because now he knew, for at least a few hours, he knew he wouldn't be worried or burdened. He would just be enjoying a friend's company.