My heart pumps irregularly, the sound of the blood filtering muffles my ears. I feel dizzy, incomprehensive, as I slowly, almost unwillingly, make my way around the district, not sure where I am headed.
Suddenly, the sound of footsteps reaches my ear, then the calling out of a gruff voice.
"Hey you over there! Stop where you are or I'll slice you!" I halt in my path but I don't glance back where the shuffling footsteps run to me, the man breathing heavily.
A steel hand crunches on my shoulder and whirls me around by force.
I am face to face with a Peacekeeper. In his hand is a short, but deadly, dagger. And I am weaponless. I eye the knife slowly, taking my eyes off it when he begins to speak.
"Katniss," he says with disgust but slight excitement. I stare back at him reservedly. "You're coming with me. The President is expecting you."
I stare at the man in a funny way. After all I've done he really did believe I'd actually listen to him. In the inside, I am laughing in devilish excitement.
Without a glance at the dagger, I snatch it out of his sweaty palm and send it through his heart, slicing through his flesh like a butter-knife through butter.
The Peacekeeper's eyes don't have time to close. His surprised eyes glaze over and they stare at me intently as his body topples to the ground. He chokes out some blood before falling to his side, his face finally invisible to me.
"That's for Gale," I breathe into his ear. I pull the dagger out of his chest and suddenly, my mind clears. I don't feel any sense of regret for the murder I just committed. That younger Katniss died inside of me. Regret to me is now only an obstacle.
After wiping the blood off of the dagger, I take in my surroundings. Tumbleweed could have accompanied the eerie silence I feel. I glance towards the direction I was initially headed, back to Haymitch and the others. I think of how Haymitch, Finnick, and all of them would react if I told them what happened.
I frown.
They wouldn't do anything. They'd only sit in the sanctuary of the ship and create plans that would probably never happen. They are useless.
So I sprint back to where I came from, avoiding any open spaces and determined not to encounter any more Peacekeepers. Building after burnt building floods my vision and I can't help but imagine the blonde girl clutching her doll, wisping between the homes…searching for her mother.
I abruptly fall to the ground, clutching my stomach in agony. Something is wrong…something is very wrong as a welling pain grows around my abdomen. I open my teary eyes and search the area around me, finding nothing.
Gradually, I sit up and grab my stomach, nurturing the throbbing insides. Tears fall down my face as I shake my head slowly.
It is impossible—but there was no other explanation.
"Calm down Katniss," I tell myself slowly, still not able to convince myself. A feeling boils inside of me.
I cry out loud and stab the dagger over and over into the ground, angry with myself…and angry with Peeta.
I can't understand how I had been so utterly blind, but I was truly, and undeniably…
Pregnant.