[Title: Learning to Fly]
[Author: JamieRay]
[Music: Billy Joel _ Vienna]
[Disclaimer: Standard disclaimers apply]
[Summary: In which rules are broken and Madison fancies quidditch boys.]
Sitting cross legged in the center of his bed back up in the dormitory Sirius was lost in thought. Everyone had already gone down to dinner, except James who was currently in the bathroom washing up. Sirius had to say it had worked out rather nicely considering he was hoping to speak to James alone before dinner.
The words that his mother had said, or rather shrieked across the hall that morning at breakfast were the source of Sirius' nervousness. He didn't understand really why James had reacted the way he did, or didn't. He had expected a fight from the way she had spoken of the boy so openly and bitterly, he had expected him to at least be insulted, but James had all but ignored it.
It would have been a stretch to say that he hadn't been aware she was referring to him. James after all, despite what he let on, was a rather bright boy, Sirius could tell simply from the calculating stare the boy so often took on when faced with the odd behavior of their roommate Remus Lupin, That boy always seemed like he had something to hide, but then that was getting into to whole other thing entirely.
"You're still here?" Sirius hadn't even realized he had zoned out when his attention was brought back into the room by the voice of James Potter.
Sirius looked up eyes focusing on the boy as he straightened, a habit that sharply reflected the lessons he'd been taught as a boy.
"Why are you still speaking to me?" Sirius asked abruptly.
James' eyebrows shot up, but from the lack of hostility in Sirius' even tone James knew the words hadn't sounded the way they were supposed to.
"I mean…Why aren't you more angry about the howler? Why aren't you angry at all?" It did not take someone particularly perceptive to notice that Sirius was a bit socially awkward, but he had a strange secure confidence about him, he didn't stumble over his words.
James shrugged moving over to sit on the edge of Sirius' bed. "I figure it isn't really your fault. It wasn't you who sent it after all."
Sirius raised his brow half in confusion, half in disbelief, could this boy really be that naïve.
James sighed and in impatience and lifted himself onto the edge of Sirius' bed. "I mean, considering you're still talking to me, and that she so mad, I just assumed you didn't agree with her…"James paused "but I guess if you do, that's a whole other story." He didn't take his eyes from Sirius, waiting for a reaction.
For the minutes after Sirius had ran from the hall at breakfast James had been anxious, The idea that the boy might suddenly stop being his friend made him nervous, more nervous than he would have liked. And then when he had returned James had been all but confused by Sirius' inconsistent attitude towards him.
"I don't agree with her." Sirius said finally after a short silence in which he had tried and failed to decipher the enigma that was James Potter.
"Good, than we don't have a problem."
"It's not that simple." Sirius insisted, James was taking the situation far too lightly.
"What isn't simple about it? You're not cross with me and I'm not cross with, what could be more simple?" James explained his twisted logic as if it weren't some complicated arithmancy equation, hands gesturing in the air because his friend refused to understand the simplicity of the situation.
"My Parents have a problem with you, how could that be simple." Sirius insisted.
"Well then were even." And for a minute Sirius thought James would say that his parents didn't approve of James' choice of friends either, after all the Blacks and the Potters had a long twisted history together. "Because I've got a problem with them too."
Sirius couldn't suppress the smile that came to his face at that, somehow James disapproving of his parents seemed ridiculous. And it took him a minute and a look at James' grinning face to realize it was a joke, and Sirius began to laugh, quietly at first and then louder when James joined in. And Sirius wasn't sure why he was laughing, because it really wasn't all that funny, but maybe he was just relieved.
When the laughter had died down James was the one to speak. "Sirius I don't care if your parents like me or not because you're my friend not them, but if you care…if you don't want to be my friend." James trailed off; he didn't want Sirius to care.
Sirius was quiet for a long moment, longer than James would have liked. It wasn't that he didn't know what he wanted, because he definitely did, Sirius had seen this coming, his parent's anger, a confrontation; he even could have taken a guess at the howler. But he never expected a realization to strike him that it didn't really matter that they didn't approve of this one little thing, because they never really approved of much. And because Sirius was a Gryffindor now, and they weren't likely to be proud or accepting of anything he did for a long while.
"I didn't say I didn't want to be your friend," Sirius spoke up, "and I didn't say I cared either." When James looked at him Sirius almost saw a smile on his face. "It's not really their business is it."
James nodded and smiled "Well good then."
The pressing quiet of the dormitory around him was begging him not to disturb his roommates, but then again, when did James ever listen to reason. The growling of his stomach was far too insistent; he needed to get something to eat.
Reaching out the bedside table James felt for his glasses, and secured them on his nose before pushing the covers off. He shifted to the edge of the bed and pushed himself off as noiselessly as possible. James took quiet steps across the dormitory floor, careful not to wake the others. His eyes shifted back and forth between the four still occupied beds. One in particular, the one to the right of his own, had him particularly on edge. Remus Lupin didn't stand James as it was, and he didn't want to have to deal with an angry roommate at this hour of the night, and on an empty stomach no less.
James passed Remus' bed and was nearing the door when the thought occurred to him. He didn't know the way to the kitchens. Turning back around his eyes fell on the bed the farthest from where he stood. The drapes around Sirius Black's four-poster were pulled shut like the others'. Sirius, having been stuck with him in detention [for being late to a lesson], hadn't had any dinner either. James was sure Sirius wouldn't mind accompanying him on his search for the kitchens, especially if he too was hungry.
Ever the risk taker, James tread back across the room as quietly as possible, eyes trained to Remus' bed the entire way. Reaching his destination he grabbed hold of the bed hangings and drew them back gently, flinching when the rings of the curtains screeched against the railings, betraying him to the silence of the dark room.
James whipped his head around to look across his bed at the one on the other side. But the curtains remained drawn and no movement could be seen. Letting out the breath he hadn't realized he'd been holding James turned back to the curtains and nearly jumped out of his skin when he was met with a pair of startling grey-blue eyes.
"Wha-"Sirius began but James cut him off with a 'shh' and a hand over his mouth. Vision still hazy, Sirius had to squint into the darkness to catch the silently mouthed 'kitchens' that James sent his way before pointing at the bed where Sirius knew Remus lay and putting his index finger before his lips in a motion of silence.
Sirius nodded, getting the idea and eased himself off the bed wincing when the bed springs squeaked beneath his weight. The two of them froze, eyes trained again on the beds of their roommates, only moving again when they were sure no one had awoken.
Outside on the landing James leaned heavily against the door breathing loudly simply because he could.
"Come on." Sirius whispered motioning with his hand for James to follow him down the dormitory stairs incase the other Gryffindor boys could hear them in the stairway, they descended quietly, with some difficulty on James' part.
Once down in the common room Sirius turned to James. "Do you even know where the kitchens are?"
"Why do you think you're here?" James retorted "To help me find them genius."
"But I don't know where they are either." Sirius rolled his eyes as if James was being ridiculous.
"That's why we're looking for them." James sighed, "Are you hungry or aren't you?" Sirius had to nod at that, because in fact he couldn't sleep on an empty stomach. "Then come on." James turned from him and headed across the common room towards the portrait hole, and Sirius followed, not having much choice.
And as James stood pushing open the portrait, Sirius decided he was just going to have to say it. "You know…you're absolute rubbish at sneaking around."
And James turned to him, hazel eyes narrowed behind thick glasses, and crossed his arms over his chest. "Just go." And Sirius grinned, and crawled through the portrait hole.
It was a fair two weeks into term, when three of the first year Gryffindor boys gathered in the trophy room to serve yet another detention. It was the fourth and final for the stunt they pulled during the sorting ceremony, and the last time he would be forced to endure the company of the irritating troublesome pair, Remus thought bitterly, clutching a rag in his fist.
Filch had exited the trophy room a short while ago, leaving them to polish the thousands of trophies sans magic. And so far Remus had rubbed diligently at the rewards, each of which told a story of Hogwarts history. And Sirius and James had snickered so irritatingly over his shoulder as he worked.
Remus stopped polishing, clenching his fist against the silver of one of the many Quidditch cups that littered the room, the stench of the polishing potion they were meant to use already making him nauseous.
James laughed, and Remus snapped. Letting the trophy roll onto the floor with a loud crash, he stood, turning on them. "You know we wouldn't even be here if it wasn't for the two of you, and you aren't even attempting to help." He hissed angrily throwing the rag at their feet.
"Oh relax, it's only been, what two minutes since he's left, we've still got hours." James replied offhandedly, exaggerating the last word.
"It's been at least a good fifteen minute, so unless you can do all of this on your own in two hours, I suggest you get a rag and get working." Remus' voice was back to its usual low tone, his moment of outburst gone, but the tension still hung in the air.
"I'll do it in less." James retorted, setting himself up for a challenge.
Remus crossed his arms over his chest, "Be my guest."
Sirius rolled his eyes, he was beginning to think they were never going to get over themselves and stop this meaningless feud that seemingly had no root. "Don't be daft James that isn't possible." He put in finally he knew James' confidence could sometime be overbearing but he hadn't been aware that the boy had such farfetched expectations for his own abilities. James was good, but nobody was that good.
James smirked giving Sirius a look that screamed 'watch me' before kicking aside the rag and drawing a long branch of smooth mahogany from his robes.
"We aren't allowed to use magic." Remus protested.
"Well then why are they teaching us if we can't use it, and besides, nobody's here." he said over his shoulder going towards a large house cup awarded to Ravenclaw five years previous.
Sirius' brow rose 'You don't even-'Sirius never finished the sentence because with a muttered incantation the once smudged and grimy trophy was gleaming in the dim light of the overhanging chandelier. "Have you been reading behind my back." Sirius accused.
James laughed.
"I can't believe you're even breaking the rules in detention." Remus began.
James sighed, not in the mood to be lectured. "Do you want to get out of here or don't you. Without magic we'll never finish." With another tap of his wand James made another trophy gleam and turned to his friend. If Remus didn't budge James knew that at least Sirius would.
Sirius was already smirking, no persuasion required, "how do you do the spell?" he said.
Remus' arms dropped from where they had been crossed over his chest. "No you can't, you'll get us in even worse trouble." He insisted, Remus tried not to sound as anxious as he felt but he certainly wasn't ready to serve more detentions, or worse, expulsion.
"Relax, there isn't anyone here to see." James and Sirius' smirking faces were far from reassuring. When James turned back to a third trophy and tapped it lightly with his wand, Remus averted his eyes to the rag at his feet, always avoiding temptation. He bent, taking it in his hand and ignoring the sound of James' voice, teaching Sirius the incantation.
Remus turned back to the trophy he'd dropped earlier, and picking it up he examined the large dent were it had hit the stone floor. He knew a spell that could fix that, He remembered reading about it, what seemed like years ago, when he had been so sure he wasn't ever going to be standing here in this castle.
Remus wondered briefly what would get him into more trouble, the dented trophy or a spell no one would ever know he'd used. His long suppressed adventurous side was beginning to surface again, and try as he might he couldn't suppress it. Maybe it was the sound of Sirius and James friendly banter as they worked over his shoulder, or the prospect of being punished for the dented trophy, or the nauseating stench of the polishing potion in the tub at his feet, but doing this the way he was supposed to suddenly seemed so much more uninviting.
Remus tried not to think about the thrill of breaking the rules, he could remember all too clearly how far it had gotten him. As a child he had always been an adventurous one, he had loved the thrill, a side of himself that constantly conflicted with his cautious disposition since that day.
How would anyone know they had used magic, was it really a risk if there was no one there to catch them at it, and they wouldn't really expel them just for casting a couple simple spells would they. Detentions he could take, but Remus didn't want to be expelled. And when had detentions become ok.
What if they were watching now, wouldn't they have stopped them already. What if he got caught, but what if he never did, Remus smiled at the thought, the thrill of keeping it all a secret, no one would ever know. He was so absorbed in his internal conflict he hadn't realized James was speaking to him until he had taken his hand, the hand that Remus had only just realized was gripping his wand.
He couldn't remember taking it from his pocket, he couldn't even remember deciding to try, but James was grinning over his shoulder, like he'd just won the lottery and speaking again.
"It's simple enough," he was saying, "just a tap and…expolio."
Remus looked on, as if detached from the scene, as James took his hand through the motions and cast the charm. "Where did you learn that?" Remus asked not realizing he was initiating conversation with the dangerously social James Potter.
James shrugged, "Michael hasn't polished his badge the muggle way since his seventeenth, I've seen him do it a couple times."
Remus tried not to express how impressed he was that the other boy had learned just be watching.
"Just try it." James encouraged when Remus' only reply was a raised brow.
Remus moved to the next trophy and reached out his wand hand, still not entirely sure he wanted to do this, but he wasn't one to back down. An anxious thrill was building up inside him, and he tried to suppress a smirk as he taped his wand to the silver and whispered, "expolio".
Remus suddenly became aware of his surroundings again when James hand came to his shoulder, "see, the world is still fully intact." He joked, and Remus realized he was grinning stupidly.
Sirius let out a breath of relief, having had his fingers crossed the entire time. This could very well be a turning point.
Remus stirred in the darkness behind his bed hangings, eyes still blurry from sleep, though his hearing was as sharp as ever. Being a normally heavy sleeper Remus wouldn't have ever felt the slight disturbance in the air, or heard the familiar whispers of two of his roommates, if it hadn't been so close to that time of month. But as it was, James and Sirius' luck was not particularly good on that night, and it, in fact, was a mere four days from that time of month.
Remus pulled aside the bed hangings, his sharp eyes searching out the disturbance. The scrape of the curtains must have alerted them to their roommate's consciousness because, just as expected, the two boys stood frozen in the center of the room. "Are you going somewhere?" Remus didn't attempt to keep the challenging tone from his voice, his eyes narrowed slightly.
"Err…the kitchens?" It was James, of course, who replied.
"I don't think so, it's far past curfew." Remus pushed himself into a sitting position as he spoke.
"Come on Remus we all missed dinner, you must be starving too." Sirius put in.
"If you get caught we all lose points, I'm not going to let you do that." Remus reprimanded. "You should have gotten something to eat after detention. "
"Getting caught isn't a part of the plan." James declared as if that solved everything.
"We aren't allowed in the kitchens either way." he demanded.
"You aren't going to tell on us are you?" Sirius challenged, daring the other to say he would. Remus remained silent, if there was anything he wasn't it was a snitch.
For lack of anything better to say or do Remus layback down pulling the curtains back around his four-poster, immersing himself in darkness.
"Thanks mate, we owe you one."
"We'll bring you something back" came the feint whispers of the two boys before the door shut with barely audible click behind them.
With no other possible course of action to take Remus crossed his finger and hoped they wouldn't get caught, Ravenclaw was already ahead in the running for house points.
"Come on, get up" there was an insistent nudging at his side, Remus of course was awake, but maybe if he pretended he wasn't the annoying voice would go away. "Remi" James whined. Remus' arm swung out in the direction of the nudging and calling.
James seemed to have ducked back just in time to miss the painful hand to his stomach, because he stood back, hands on his hips, smirking triumphantly. "Knew that one would get you."
"What do you want?" Remus shot back crossly.
"To share." Sirius stated simply from where Remus was only now noticing him, next to James, in his hand and bag of what Remus presumed to be food. It didn't seem as though he was going to get that much sleep that night either way, Remus pushed himself out of bed.
"Read 'em and weep girls." She smirked, turning out her palms to reveal the cards held between the fingers of both her hands.
Her declaration of victory was followed by a chorus of sighs and whines of annoyance, as the rest of the girls sitting around the small circle in the center of the first year girl's dormitory all threw their cards down in the center. They had been playing with a muggle deck one of them had fished out of the bottom Melissa's trunk when Diana had finally convinced her to unpack the blasted thing, and only two weeks later than was normal.
The issue was that the magical wardrobe the girls' dormitory had been fitted with was just that, it was magical, and Mellissa was hard pressed to trust anything magical at all. Call it a ridiculous idea, but how was she to know it wasn't going to just, 'magically swallow up all my things', as she had so eloquently put it one morning over breakfast after Lily had complained that she had spent 'a little too much time searching through you trunk for clean socks, don't you think?'. To which her friends had laughed and James had told her she had spent far too much time in the muggle world, and had become 'slightly touched in the head', and 'would you please come back down to earth now.'
Lily stared the girl down with a searching look in her emerald eyes. Madison Elaine was her victim. Madison was quiet, plain, and shy to say the least. And Lily was very much curious about the quiet little girl that sat in the back corner of the classroom, and hoped the world would just ignore her existence.
"Alright Madison, fancy anyone?" her face went red.
"Er, I- no one really." She barely managed to stutter out.
"Come on Maddie, you must answer." The game was simple the winner would choose one of the other girls in the circle and ask her any question she wanted. The other would have to answer under the condition that not a single word said would be repeated to anyone outside the circle.
Madison twisted her hands in her lap and mumbled something indistinguishable.
"Sorry?"
"Jordan Lain." She mumbled again, this time barley audible but still heard. The girls sounded their approval of the tanned brunette fourth year seeker of the Ravenclaw Quidditch team.
Footsteps sound from behind the boys. James froze in his tracks, Sirius and Remus tumbling into him, and the three boys went tumbling into the tapestry.
"Merlin Potter, warn a bloke before you stop you like that." Sirius mumbled rubbing the back of his neck.
"Shh, quiet they'll hear us." Remus elbowed Sirius hard in the ribs.
James didn't notice the bickering, or the shoving that then ensued, he was looking somewhere beyond them. "Hey Sirius, isn't that your cousin." It was a harsh whisper that came with tug on the other boy's sleeve.
Sirius' attention snapped up to the standing over them, lips locked in what seemed to be a rather passionate kiss, hardly noticing them.
Remus stared wide eyed at the two, James stared amused at Sirius, and Sirius…"Bloody Hell- !" well he gave away their position.
James clamped his hand over Sirius mouth but it was too late they had been spotted. The two jumped apart cheeks deeply flushed, either from their activities or being caught, one couldn't quite tell.
"Damn it Sirius do you ever just disappear." Andromeda rounded on them, looking more flustered than cross. "What are you doing out this late anyway it's far past curfew." She turned back to the other man, who James had just recognized to be Ted Tonks, the Care of Magical Creatures professor's young new assistant. "Why don't you say something you're the authority here."
"Not in these circumstances." he chuckled, "I'll leave you to it then, after all who better to do the job than family." then pecking her on the cheek he dashed out from behind the tapestry.
Sirius jaw hung open, he stared wide eyed at his cousin, her face reddened further, still she crossed her arms and stood her ground, this was not the time to give in no matter how adorable he was being. "Sirius Orion Black close your mouth, that's not very proper."
"Neither is snogging a professor." he teased. "I wonder what auntie would say, Tonks, which family is he from again?"
"None he's muggle born." she mumbled under her breath.
"What was that?"
"He's muggle born alright, and he's not a professor he's an assistant professor."
Sirius mock gasped in horror.
"Oh, as if you've ever cared." Andromeda gathered her nerves and glared down at him.
"No but I know someone who might."
"Tell Cissy and Bella and I swear I'll make you pay."
Remus spoke up then. "Take off this week's detentions and I'll personally make sure he keeps his mouth shut." James looked at the usually quiet and soft spoken boy; he was impressed to say the least.
Andromeda looked flustered. "Come on Andy it's a fair trade" James put in, backing Remus up.
"Not a soul all of you do you hear me."
The tree boys smirked triumphantly, nodding in unison. "Our lips are sealed."
"Now get to bed before I have to give you a detention for tonight." she grumbled storming out of the corridor.
"Good call Remi, I didn't know you had it in you." James clapped him on the back.
"Don't call me that." He shoved his hand away
"You know I'm really starting to like you Remi." Sirius said slinging his arm over the smaller boy's shoulders.
Remus rolled his eyes; they were never going to let the name go.