Hey there guys...and girls. :) Sorry it took so long to get this up. I just was trying to get it right because it's my first request. It has some angst, but I just can't kill either of these characters. :/ Anyways, I hope you enjoy. Read and review please. :D The song is Valentine's Day by Linkin Park.
"Valentine's Day"
My insides all turned to ash, so slow
And blew away as I collapsed, so cold
They told me the news as if it were nothing new. They told me as if you were just another random person on the street that I never had met. It was just another topic to cover on the Hokage's agenda.
I knew that our village is somewhat cold and rough around the edges, but for not one person to even flinch at the mention of his name shocked me. Nara Shikamaru was MIA; therefore, he wouldn't be escorting me during the chunnin exams.
It was that simple. Life was to move on as normal. But, there in lies my problem. Everything is no longer normal for me.
It is now back to that empty feeling inside of my chest. It pulls everything around as if it were connected to one of Kankuro's puppets. It feels cold like Gaara used to be.
The meeting was over, just like that. I planned to race out of there as fast as I could to reach fresh air and feel the hot wind hit my face to help me focus, but Gaara ordered me to stay with him to talk. As my little brother, I would have said no, but he was my Kazikage now. I was not to disrespect him.
"Temari, you were close to Nara." He said it as a fact like he knew what was secretly between us. That bond of friendship and that mutual agreement that we both wanted more but didn't dare. Though, we ignored that sometimes on occasion.
"Yes." I wasn't going to lie to him because that would mean that I would have to sit here longer. "But as a ninja, these things happen all the time. We have to accept it and move on."
Gaara sat there looking out the window. He was thinking. Sometimes I worry that he thinks too much. "I see. You always were overly mature, Temari. You are logical, but don't forget to let out your emotions sometimes." He gave his best effort at a smile. "Or you'll end up like me."
I nodded and stood up slowly heading to the door. As I placed my hand on the doorknob, I looked back to see Gaara's face. It looked sad and worried, and I knew it was because of me.
I walked outside into the streets wondering how to calm myself down. On the outside, I probably appeared all right. Maybe even content. I had that uncanny ability to do that.
The wind blew and picked up sand and flung in into my eyes causing them to water.
It was my signal, and I hated nature for that. I raced home through the crowds of people looking at me as if I were insane.
In some respect, they were right. It was insane to care this much about someone as a ninja. You keep people at a distance. You don't let your guard down. And yet, I did.
I collapsed onto my bed as soon as I entered my bedroom. My face hit the pillow as droplets hit the fabric.
From now on, I was alone again. I needed to do everything by myself again.
How cruel life really was.
A black wind took them away, from sight
And held the darkness over day, that night
I never thought that I would be the one to be captured. But, I guess that if the genin had followed my orders, I wouldn't have been. But the next generation of Shinobi are more important to the village than I will ever be. I had protected them so they could get away.
And then there was nothing but darkness. The kind of darkness that makes you think about the people you care about. And then it all fades. But the thing about the darkness is that you focus on the most important person to you last.
It surprised me to imagine her of all the people. Temari of the Sand was the last person I saw before the black took over.
On top of that, I happened to wake up in a torture chamber. It was all troublesome. I wasn't going to talk. That's not how a Shinobi operates. The funny ironic thing about this chamber is that it has several cracks of light. A torture chamber is to be dark and scary for lack of better words.
As I decided to survey the ninja, I noticed that he was not the same one I had fought. The ninja was sand Shinobi. And that only brought her back to my mind. Then of all times. I needed to focus. The Sand Village was an ally. Surely, this has to be a mistake.
"Well, if it isn't Nara Shikamaru. We heard so highly of you." He paused, and so I took the opportunity to highly assess the situation. I was chained. There was no shock there. What was surprising was that I was chained to a chair instead of a wall. And the chair was not chained to the ground. I could retaliate if I needed to. "Oh, poor Nara. You really shouldn't have gotten close to her."
I looked into his eyes. They were cold and harsh just like every other sand nin's eyes. Like her eyes most of the time. He was a bulky character meaning he focused on brute strength rather than logistics. There is an advantage there. But he was going to pound on me in the meantime. My greatest strength was no help to me for awhile.
How cruel life really was.
And the clouds above move closer
Looking so dissatisfied
For me, the hardest thing about going to a funeral is seeing the gathered mass that is all around you. This is especially true in the Hidden Leaf Village. They are close-knit and take every death was complete reconciliation.
It was funny to see that much unlike my village people generally cared for each other's welfare here. It seemed that I was not the only person that cared for him. That cared about him. That wanted him to come back.
The clouds drifted overhead. They moved in a lazy nonchalant sort of way. They moved in a way that reminded me of him. On the bright side of this situation, he would have liked the scenery above him. The caring loved ones he fought so hard for mourning and a lovely sky above us all. I am not someone to cry about anything. I just don't cry. After years of emotional training, you were not allowed to show signs of weakness in my village.
But I was not in my village. I was in a place where crying was not frowned upon. Naturally, water built up in my eyes and eventually rolled down my cheeks. This time I chose not to wipe them off. I never truly showed that I cared about him in his lifetime, but I was sure as hell not going to rub off his funeral as nothing. Even Nara deserved that type of respect.
Unexpectedly, a hand landed on my shoulder. Shikaku stood beside me, and as I turned, I saw Yoshino headed away from the crowd. I knew how she felt, but I was sure my pain was nothing compared to hers. She was his mother after all.
"Temari, I'm glad you came. I wish you didn't have to, but he would have wanted you here." Shikaku's voice was quivering somewhat. It was much unlike himself, but I realized that death brought things out of people no one really expected. Gaara was the perfect example of that.
I simply nodded at him. "I wouldn't have missed it for anything." She looked directly into his eyes firmly. She wanted to make her point very apparent to him. "I mean that."
She noted the brief gust of wind that flew over the funeral. She was always reassured by the wind, but this time, she couldn't get a clear sense from it. Now, she really had nothing to comfort her.
But the heartless wind kept blowing, blowing
Of all the people I knew, I never imagined that I would be the person be tortured to death. But it's too troublesome to think of something like that. Simply because focusing on something as trivial as a what if? won't erase the pain that now throbs on my body. The guy was a hard ass. He thinks way too highly of themselves.
He was strong, but he was very thick-headed. I used no chakra when he beat the shit out of me. You would think that he would have noticed that I had been preserving it but apparently not.
I was now on the ground sore and throbbing. He left me bloody and bruised in this isolated room. What a major drag.
So now comes my escape out. My shadows could do the trick, but a wind blew my hope away as the door open and shut.
"Nara!" That voice was definitely Kankuro's. As I looked up, I saw pure panic and a dose of shock in him. I guess I look worse than I had originally thought. Something must have gone on here that was beyond both of our knowledge. It was probably even below Gaara's head. "What the hell happened?"
I sat up against the nearest wall while I was still bound in the chains. "Well, if you didn't know, Gaara probably didn't either. I'm guessing one of Temari's suitors heard of her talking about me. He intentionally came looking for me, and he was willing to hurt any innocent kids to get to me." I don't know why, but anger filled me. The genin did nothing wrong. "What's his name, Kankuro?"
Kankuro sighed and approached me, breaking the chains with the sharp edges of his puppets. They really were works of art, well, works of the art of battle. "He fled the village. He was a rogue ninja that came back to obtain Temari as something of a prize." He paused. I could tell that he was trying to tuck back emotions that were sure to have come out otherwise. "He is a scumbag that manages to get away every time we get close to catching him."
As my hands were made available to me, I started planning my next move. He was after Temari, and he wasn't going to leave without her. I turned to Kankuro quickly and placed my hands on his shoulders. "Where is she?"
Kankuro looked at me in a way that I had never seen him. "She's at your funeral in Konoha."He said it so plainly. Emotional while showing no signs of emotions. That was a talent that not even Temari could do. It hit me that they thought I was dead, but she was in Konoha, unaware and unprepared. "Fine. We have to get there fast." I tried to stand only to feel the intense pain in my legs that I had ignored for several hours. It hurt, but I could ignore it until nightfall.
I could tell that Kankuro was alittle panicked; I would have been surprised if he didn't because I felt crazy. Here I was worrying about someone that could take care of herself. But the thing is I wasn't going to take the chance. That guy was crazy. There was no telling what he'd do.
I used to be my own protection, but not now
Cause my path had lost direction, somehow
It has been three days now in Konoha, and this will be the fourth night here.
The night was officially the worst time of the day. It was when all your thoughts flood through your head, and the memories you try to face deep inside yourself resurface. It doesn't help when the night is filled with rain that keeps you up either. I never thought that I would end up in a place like this. I was the one that was supposed to be the hard ass that buried emotions so deep inside herself that they would never appear.
But it's funny to see that in retrospect no one can be emotionless. Not even Gaara.
Now, sitting up in the bed we shared many nights together, I'm lost. No one knew that he was the reason I improved ranks so quickly. He pushed me to be better without ever really doing anything. I wanted to impress him, and every time I did. That only empowered me.
I placed my head on my knees and let the tears trinkle down onto my legs. It wasn't worth holding in any longer.
The door creaked open, and it was then that fear took over me. And this time, lazyass wasn't going to be able to save me. "My dear princess, don't cry anymore."
I didn't look at him because I knew who he was. I glanced to the corner of my room where my greatest ally sat on the floor. My fan was the only hope of going against a brutally massive ninja like him.
So I darted to the corner only to be pulled against him as my hand grazed my only hope. It was over.
"Just get back into the bed. We'll be just fine." I hesitated to his command, but he pushed me onto the bed harshly before I could really react. I hated him. I hated anyone that could have so much power over me. Not only that, to actually use it on me.
Shikamaru was the only person I ever let take over me willingly. Even then, he was gentle and kind in his takeover. This guy was radically different.
He shoved me around on the bed until he was on top of me. I struggled to get him off, but his strength overwhelmed my efforts. "Stop!"
But there was nothing else I could do so I closed my eyes. But suddenly he stopped. I was afraid to open them, but when the pressure of his body was relieved, I cracked them open. "Are you alright?" That voice couldn't be his. He was dead.
But as my eyes adjusted to the darkness, I saw the guy binded in shadows. I simply nodded as I watched the ninja die a slow and painfully hostile death in the shadows. He deserved it. He deserved every single painfully dark second.
"Shikamaru…" He emerged from behind the figure, pulling a kunai out of his pocket. He was bruised and obviously exhausted, but he was definitely alive. He stabbed the kunai into the guy's heart.
He approached me slowly and eventually passed out on the bed as soon as he reached it. There was nothing like watching a supposedly dead person sleep.
A black wind took you away, from sight
And held the darkness over day, that night
Looking back on last night, I can only hope nothing like that happens again. But I know something of the sorts will cause events like that again. Unless I'm lucky. I had rushed him to hospital only to find him even worse off than I thought he was. He still hasn't woken up, and it scares me to think that I will have to lose him again.
And the clouds above move closer
Looking so dissatisfied
Even when I know I'm unconscious, she still has to enter my mind. The clouds I have imagined are absolutely perfect. It was a perfect day that I had made up in my mind. I laid in the grass where it was perfectly perfect. Yet, it was all wrong. Because she wasn't there beside me. I had risked my life to save hers. Now, I had to get back to her. That was the only way to stop this miserably beautiful dream. Or in my own troublesome mind, a nightmare.
That's when I opened my eyes to meet her worried ones. I have only seen those a few times in the years I've known her. One being the other night, before I passed out. It was weird to wish for something so much and unexplainably get it. It blows even my mind.
"Hey troublesome." It was weird to hear my voice so raspy and faint. But then again, I don't think I've used my vocal chords in days. That would explain a lot of it.
And the ground below grew colder
As they put you down inside
I tried to walk today when I first woke up, and I unfortunately failed miserably. My feet fell from underneath me, and she had to giggle at the sight. There was nothing new about her laugh. It had to same sound waves and same tone, but it was something sweet to hear after days of torment and relentlessly toil.
They had to check me out on an operation table. They had to lift me up on it, and I could see her face drop. She was traumatized even though she would never admit it. She lost someone dear to her before. I smile at the thought of Temari being a little needy of people.
They took me away from her. I told her to take a walk with Choji outside. That it would help her calm down. And for once, she actually took my advice without a comment or retort. She nodded and I hoped that Choji had that unending kindness toward her.
But the heartless wind kept blowing, blowing
He told me to go outside so I did what he asked. This was my way of following his last wish if this was it. As if I could ever repay him for what he did. Kankuro was headed to Konoha with him, but Shikamaru persisted faster than Kankuro thought was smart.
In the great scheme of things, I'm glad that he was so stupid. Or I don't know what type of mental state I would be in at the moment.
Choji was outside in the courtyard, eating as always. However, it was of a healthier choice instead of his normal bag of chips. He sat on a bench looking up at the clouds. I could tell that he was worried too. Maybe even more than I was worried.
I felt guilt more than anything. This whole ordeal was my own fault. That sort of thing bothers of strong-headed and confident person like me. Though, no one would admit it.
I hurried out the doors only to be met with a cold brisk wind. It was a sign and I could never ignore something as strong as it. The scent the wind brought to my senses was his and only his. I still proceeded to approach the bench and almost collapsed next to Choji.
"Temari.. he'll be okay."
So now you're gone, and I was wrong
I never knew what it was like, to be alone
The thought of being alone again irked me. It was quite obvious that it hadn't worked out for me the first time. Being powerless wasn't my style, and yet here I was hoping some guy would be okay. It was infuriating especially when roses and chocolates surrounded me everywhere. Oh, how I hate Valentine's Day.
On a Valentine's Day, on a Valentine's Day
On a Valentine's Day, on a Valentine's Day
On a Valentine's Day, on a Valentine's Day
I decided to head back inside and wait for Shikamaru. It is not that I disliked Choji, it was simply that he couldn't help. But as I approached his room, I saw his face, his smug intelligent face being wheeled back into the room. I sighed and hurried into the room. Well, not hurried, more like briskly and casually walked in.
And just like that, he smirked as he watched me enter. There was a bouquet of roses on his tableside.
I sat down in a chair near the window. "Are those from Ino?" I knew they were, and if he tried to deny it, I'd know he was lying. Who else would bring flowers to him in the hospital?
He simply nodded. "It's not what you think, Temari." He coughed abruptly, and it made me jump alittle. I doubt he noticed though.
"I told her to buy them for me…well, technically, for you." He picked the tied bunch of flowers up and threw them onto my lap with absolute accuracy. "Happy Valentine's Day."
I knew from the first time I had ever truly talked with Shikamaru that he would never be romantic. It just wasn't in his lazy nature. It's not that he would never try, but he would never succeed. But it is always to thought that counts.
Before he went in, he planned all of this. That takes effort and time. So I got him some props. He tried to be sweet, and in his own little way, he was.
(I used to be my own protection, but not now)
As I sat up in the hospital bed, I saw my success written across her face. Well, a small glow resided on her facial features for a split second, but the achievement was there. Under her tough exterior, she was happy. I knew that look.
To anyone else, they would have missed it, but I knew her a lot better than I even knew myself. She enjoyed roses. She never specifically said she did, but every time we would pass the flower shop, she would eye the red roses in the window. The roses, of course, had their own section in the front, and she'd briefly stare at them as we passed.
It was a subtle sign that I doubt anyone else would have noticed.
"Do you like them?" I truly wanted to know if I got it right. Maybe she was staring at the daisies the whole time. Or maybe she was searching for Ino through the clear windows.
"Shikamaru, they're fine." She gazed down at them with a slight twinkle in her eye.
I sighed. I caught a break with her for once.
I realized then that this was a simple game of cat and mouse. I was always the mouse. I was no longer just protecting myself in life. I was also protecting her.