AURTHORS NOTE: Hello I'm back at it. Hope you enjoy!
Forgetting Myself. Chapter 7
Spencer's POV
"Spencer…." I was currently picking at my coffee sleeve trying to avoid eye contact with her. I knew if I was too look into I'd start to fall under the Ashley Davis spell again, just like I did when I was 17. I cleared my throat and readjusted myself in my seat.
"What were you and my mother talking about after the game?" I looked up and made eye contact with her but she quickly averted her eyes and took a deep breath. Weird.
"She… She told me not to break your heart." Brown meets blue. God I could get lost in those eyes. "You know, if you were to give me a chance" she shrugged "She just warned me not to break your heart and I wouldn't."
I knew she wanted to just dive right into it, but I couldn't, not now. Not in public. Plus I've only seen her twice in the last four years. Nope, she doesn't get to get off this easy "Ashley, can we not even talk about that now?" Her face kind of show hurt, but she nodded.
"So what do you do nowadays?" she took a sip and I couldn't tear my eyes away from her lips wrapping around the lid of her coffee.
"I'm a producer for a tv show" I took a sip of my drink "It's a stressful job but I enjoy it." I shrugged and looked out the window watching the people and cars pass by.
"Are you happy?" I wasn't surprised by her question. I couldn't answer her right away, because honestly I didn't know the answer. She read my face and apologized "Sorry, I shouldn't have asked. It's not my place."
"It's fine Ashley." I looked at her "I'm content with my life, but I can't say that I'm happy." I took a deep breath and continued "I have a good job, great friends and family, but I've been missing my happiness." She looked confused. "My happiness left four years ago." I couldn't look at her anymore, if I did I wouldn't be able to keep myself together. God 45 minutes together and I'm already falling under the Ashley Davies spell. "Are you ready to go?" I asked.
She just nodded and got up to throw her cup away. I followed behind her. We made our way back to my car. Ashley finally broke the silence between us as I pulled out of the parking lot heading back to the fields to drop her off to her car
"So let's see what Spencer Carlin is listening nowadays." She hit the Bluetooth button on my dash which was connected to my phone "just the same old same old music, I'm surprised I haven't stumbled upon Kelly Clarkson yet." She kept hitting the skip button going to the next song "well I spoke too soon on that one." She laughed and went onto the next song, her laughing stopped when she heard a familiar.
Shit. I totally forgot I had her songs on my phone. The old ones that she just sent me and the newer ones that I was never supposed to hear. Her voice filled my speakers and she was frozen. I immediately turned off the radio and thankfully we were at the fields, I don't think I could take this awkwardness any longer. I parked in front of her car. "Ho…..How do you have this?" she was looking at me, I could feel her eyes burning holes into the side of my face "Spencer, how do you have this? I never released this song."
I looked down at my hand in my lap. I could tell she was upset. I shrugged "Chelsea let me hear it and I just it was the piece I had left of you, was your music." A tear ran down my cheek but I immediately wiped it away "I'm sorry."
I never got a response "I should go." She was out of my car and walking towards her before I could look up. I watched her walk the remanding distance to her car her hand was on her door handle but she never opened it. She turned around and I rolled down my window "That song that song was for you. Everything I've written it was for you." I had no words. Every emotion caught up on to me.
"Ashley, wait!" I got out of my car and her hand was placed on her door handle. She didn't turn around; she looked frozen, and fragile. But I was broken too. She broke me. She turned around and I saw a tear slide down her cheek "Why?" she wiped her cheek "Why did you run?" her mouth opened but no words fell out. "I wasn't going to, so why did you?" I stepped closer to her "I was going to ask for you to come with me" she looked up finally and met my eyes "That night we went to the beach I was going to ask you to come with me." I clenched my jaw together; my anger was starting to build from all this time I've held this in "I've got to go."
Just like that, I left her in the parking lot. I looked in my rear mirror she was still standing in the same spot. She never said anything; I never gave her a chance to. When I got home I saw Abby's car in my driveway. I took a second to gather myself before opening my front door
"Spencer? Is that you?" I walked into my kitchen seeing her eating a sandwich
"Yeah, it's me." I sat beside her on laying my head on the island table.
"What's wrong with you? Looks like you just spent the whole day with an ex." She chuckled clearly saying it as a joke but when I looked up at her she realized it actually happened "No shit you totally spent the day with Ashley"
"I don't want to talk about it" I scooted out of my chair and started to walk to my room slowly stripping off my clothes. I needed to wash this day off of me. Literally. I stepped in the shower the hot water running down my face. I leaned against the wall just enjoying the steam relaxing all of my muscles.
I stood in the shower letting the letting the warm water run down my back. Today was rough. I always felt better after taking a long hot shower after a stressful day. And having Ashley in her with me was an added bonus. "Can you wash my back?" I bit my lip and nodded and grabbed the soap
"Turn around." I lathered the soap on my hands letting my hands slowly roam over her back. My fingertips slowly tracing my marks I left on her back the night before. I could tell she was smirking. I laid a kissing on the back of her neck before resuming my wandering hands. My hands slowly drifted down to her ass grabbing it slightly, earning a moan from her "you can rinse off now" I stepped back watching the water running down her tan skin. I bit my lip as she turned around slowly raising on of her eyebrow up "Like what you see?" I smiled and wrapped my arms around her waist pulling her closer to me connecting our lips in a deep kiss. I pressed her against the cold tile moaning into her mouth.
I started laying kisses down her neck nipping her skin softly; trying not to leave a mark "Spencer" she whispered sliding her hands in my hair tugging me back to her lips.
"SPENCER!" my name followed by obnoxious knocking on my bathroom door "You've been in there for almost 45 minutes."
"I'm fine, I'm getting out now." I turned off the water and stepped out of the shower wrapping a towel around myself. I wiped the steam off of the mirror to look at myself. I sighed and opened my door to see Abby lying on my bed "Why are you still here?"
"Jeez, you are usually in a good mood after a shower." She sat up and watched me walk into my closet just in a towel then walking out clothed and my hair up. I climbed on the bed lying next to her staring up at my ceiling
"Sorry, it was a rough day." I took a deep breath "I think I might go out tonight, to a club. Wanna go?"
"Yeah, but I'm going to have to raid your closet. I'm not dressed slutty enough" I laughed and walked into my closet
Tonight was going to end on a high note, hopefully…
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