College Daze
Chapter Seven: Regrets
Once Hiroki's breathing returned to normal, he opened his eyes and looked down at his relaxing cock. He was suddenly emotionally exhausted, physically spent, and still more than a little drunk. His head, light from both the flesh and the liquor he'd consumed, spun dangerously.
Despite this, he carefully stripped the condom off his shrinking shaft. He tossed this in the waste basket and then rocked back off his knees. Despite the cold press of the tile floor against his naked flesh, he just sat there. After a minute of this, Hiroki pulled his knees to his chest and wrapped a lean arm around them, hugging them close to his body. His other arm cradled his head and his long fingers tangled restlessly through his hair. Other than this motion, however, he was completely still.
Takano too settled back. He slipped off his knees and slid over. He stretched out his legs before him and pressed his heated back against the smooth cool side of the bath. He could feel the lube trickle out of his empty hole onto the ceramic underneath his ass.
He looked at Hiroki silently, then leaned over slightly and reached for his discarded pants. He pulled a crumpled pack and a lighter from his pocket. He lit up and took a deep drag. The ache in his ass gave Takano a new sensation of vacancy, but even so, it was a peaceful kind of hollow. He leaned his head back against the edge of the tub and closed his eyes, allowing himself to drift, deeply drowsy in his post coital state. It took a lot for him to be really affected these days, so his body felt pleasantly buzzed by both the liquor and his endorphins.
After a few more minutes of silence, Hiroki unfolded himself. He stood slowly and began to gather his clothes, his motions only slightly unsteady now that the rush of conquest had been bled from his body. Unmindful of any pretense of decorum now after so defiling his host's bathroom, he took a hand towel from beside the sink and wet it. He clumsily wiped himself down and then began pulling his clothes back on.
Dark eyes peered out nervously from under thick brown bangs at the figure resting on the floor before him. Takano didn't need to open his eyes to feel the other man's gaze on him.
"Well, that was fun," he mumbled, taking another deep drag, his eyes still closed.
Even though he was free from Takano's amber-eyed gaze, Hiroki still felt himself blush.
"You okay?" Hiroki asked as he tucked his shirttails back into his pants.
Takano opened one eye and regarded him curiously. "You're asking me that now?" He snorted lightly.
Hiroki leaned down and picked up his socks and his tie. He stood there dumbly before Takano, unmoving. Takano realized to his surprise that Kamijou was actually still waiting for an answer.
"Yeah, I'm fine," he finally said on his next smoky exhalation.
Hiroki sat down on the toilet and began pulling on his socks. As he stood after he'd finished, he swayed a bit.
"You're a little drunk, I think, Kamijou." Takano observed this through heavy-lidded eyes.
"Yeah, it seems that way." Hiroki looked at Takano uneasily. "I uh… have to go," The snarl and growl were gone from his voice. Takano was struck with how young this absence made the "T" student sound.
"Do you need anything?" Hiroki asked uncomfortably, peering warily at the still naked Takano.
Takano laughed bitterly at this strange question.
"Just like you, I suppose, I'd like someone to fill in the bottomless pit in my heart, but I don't really see that happening tonight." He exhaled a perfect ring of smoke. "So, I guess instead I'll settle for that wet towel."
Hiroki eyed the sodden towel on the counter he'd used to wipe himself down. Despite what they just had done, he still couldn't escape his meticulous nature. Instead of picking it up, he reached for another and ran it under the cold tap. He wrung this out and handed it to Takano. Both men started but pretended not to notice when their fingers brushed in the exchange.
"Thanks." Takano took the damp cloth with the hand not holding his cigarette and began wiping his seed and sweat from his skin.
Hiroki nodded. He stepped into his guest slippers and headed for the exit. "See you around," he mumbled as he opened the door to step out.
Takano looked up at the brunet from his ablutions. "Probably not," he said softly.
Hiroki paused for a moment and frowned as he considered Takano's words. His expression shifted to something slightly pained. Again he nodded and though he felt more than a little bit foolish, his shoulders dipped down in a slight bow before he closed the door.
Once he stepped away from the chamber of his latest indiscretion, Hiroki breathed a deep sigh.
"Shit," he breathed.
Behind the closed door of the bath, once finished with his wipe-down, Takano tapped his cigarette out on the tile floor. He studied the soiled towel in his hand, before he flipped it over his shoulder into the tub behind him. He ran a hand through his still sweat-damp, dark hair.
"Shit," he murmured.
Hiroki started down the stairs. He grabbed the railing now, feeling more than a bit unsteady. He looked up from watching the careful placement of his feet as he descended and felt a jolt when he encountered cold, gray eyes staring at him from the bottom of the staircase.
"Shit." Hiroki exhaled the profanity again as he tried to muster the strength to display his previous bravado. Reaching the base of the stairs he slipped under the sash and stood up back out in the main area of the party, though he was hard pressed not to trip as he did this.
"Where's Takano," Yokozawa snarled.
Hiroki scowled. Despite his exhaustion, Yokozawa's rudeness incited him to be reckless.
"Your boyfriend will be down in a minute," he growled back. "If he can walk, that is." Hiroki added under his breath, purposely loud enough for Yokozawa to hear him."
"What did you just say?" Yokozawa's eyes had widened and then narrowed back down dangerously almost immediately. He reached out a hand and was about to grasp Hiroki's shoulder to shake him when a voice off to the side of him stopped him in his tracks.
"There you are, Old Man. Come on now, we're leaving." Akihiko's cultured tones broke through the two men's tension.
Akihiko had watched Hiroki head up the stairs earlier and had seen Takano follow him up a few minutes later. He'd also been observing Yokozawa waiting there for some time now at the stairs' base and had become concerned as he'd witnessed the man's obvious frustration mounting as the clock ticked onwards. So the minute he'd seen Hiroki emerge from the hallway he ambled over hoping to head off any major conflict.
Had it been anyone else to approach, Yokozawa would have told him to "fuck off!" and would have gone after his offender anyway. As an intern with aspirations at Marukawa, however, and understanding fully that Usami was one of their rising star authors, Yokozawa knew better than to get involved in any disputes with the man.
Hiroki looked at Akihiko in mild disbelief. It took him a moment to change gears as he'd been readying himself for combat. This and the liquor still burning in his veins caused him to respond to his unrequited's intercession in a way that he normally wouldn't have.
"And what about your precious Takahiro?"
Both Akihiko and Yokozawa started at the venom in his voice.
"Takahiro is happily talking economics which he finds endlessly thrilling, while I, unfortunately, do not," Akihiko offered gracefully. Hiroki suddenly felt ashamed at himself as he knew that whether or not Akihiko cared about the topic, he would have been happy merely to bask in Takahiro's bland presence for hours.
"Listen to your friend. I think it would be wisest for you to leave now." It was bold of Yokozawa to use such a tone in front of Usami, but he was still burning from Hiroki's comments.
Hiroki scowled at this, the way that Yokozawa said "friend" held the same sharp edge as his own earlier "boyfriend" and cut him just as raggedly. Bleeding from too many other places at the moment, however, Hiroki was too weary to fight at this point, so instead he shifted his gaze from Yokozawa back to Akihiko.
"Thank god," he muttered "I thought we'd be stuck in this dump all night." Hiroki winced when his growled tones, which he'd intended to sound furious, came out slightly whiny.
Akihiko noted this, though his face remained impassive.
"Let's go then." In an uncommon act he set his hand gently on Hiroki's arm to guide him away. Hiroki blushed at the touch and the thrill that this contact sent spinning through him. Still, he turned his back proudly on Yokozawa, after offering one last frown, and walked away with Akihiko, managing to keep his step steady until just before the apartment's entry.
Fifteen minutes later, Yokozawa looked up. It was all he could do to hold his face steady and not allow the wild relief he felt to show when Takano suddenly appeared at the top of the stairs.
It had taken all his reserves not to rush upstairs and check on Takano as soon as that obnoxious brunet and Usami were out of sight. He had only managed to refrain knowing how pissed off Takano would be if he intruded (not that this always stopped him). This was something that had happened far more than once before.
Seeing Yokozawa waiting, Takano let out an audible sigh. He moved as nonchalantly as he could as he descended. Yokozawa held the sash up as he slipped under it with an inebriated grace. He looked into the cool gray eyes for only an instant and then glanced away.
"I'm leaving." Takano stated this as though it had been Yokozawa that had dragged him to the party. Yokozawa said nothing to this; he just offered a slight nod. The two men silently made their way to the entry and retrieved their things. Within a few minutes the pair were out on street below.
Takano breathed deeply, the crisp air helping to clear his fuzzy head. "Give me a smoke," he demanded.
Yokozawa's brows rose at the order.
"I only had two left in my pack and I smoked them both upstairs." Takano's growl was just slightly softer.
Yokozawa fished in his jacket pocket. He studied Takano as they walked. He located his cigarettes and noted he was getting low himself. He pulled a smoke from the pack his with mouth and then extended the crumpled container with the remaining fags to Takano.
"What?"
Takano was uncomfortable with how Yokozawa was silently scrutinizing him. He took the offered pack and pulled out a cigarette.
Yokozawa frowned as he watched Takano slip the remaining smokes into his own jacket pocket. His annoyance at this habit caused him to be bolder than usual. This, or it could have been the several drinks he'd had himself by that point. The business student stopped. He looked at Takano appraisingly.
"I can't tell if you're limping or staggering, Masamune," he offered mildly.
Takano was unaccustomed to the flush that filled his cheeks at Yokozawa's comment. He distracted himself by patting down his pockets.
"That's none of your business!"
"Ummmm…" Yokozawa hummed, dropping his eyes as he lit his cigarette. He raised them when he heard Takano utter a frustrated "Fuck!"
"I think I must have left my lighter back at the party."
"Really?" Yokozawa sounded completely disinterested as he made an obvious display of returning his lighter back into his pocket.
Takano frowned at this sudden insubordination.
He shocked Yokozawa then by lurching forward and grabbing the man's lapel. He pressed the tip of their cigarettes together; it was Takano's second indirect kiss of the evening. He pulled away when his smoke finally caught.
"I'm fucking you when we get back to my apartment, Takafumi."
Yokozawa's eyes widened at this sudden declaration. "You're drunk!" he snorted.
Takano's voice was emotionless; amber-eyes pierced him.
"Does that really matter?"
The slight bit of levity that had reigned in Yokozawa's eyes instantly evaporated as clouds of solemn sorrow rolled back in. Yokozawa blew a rolling ribbon of smoke into the dark air.
"No, I suppose it doesn't," he murmured beginning to walk forward.
Takano soon joined him again and the two men traveled silently together. After a few minutes Takano breathed a long sigh.
"Just know this changes nothing: it doesn't mean anything." He purposely looked away from Yokozawa as he said this.
"It never does, does it?" Yokozawa's voice was resigned and surprising gentle. He knew what his unrequited said wasn't true: it did have meaning. It meant that Takano was trying to regain some of the pride he'd lost with whatever happened between him and the brunet at the party.
If it would assuage him, Yokozawa didn't mind giving up some of his own pride. After all he loved Takano and this had reduced the stock of his ego (at least in the case of Takano) to a rather cheap commodity.
Takano glanced over, both pained and relieved by Yokozawa's easy acceptance. Without any further conversation they continued moving in the direction of the train station.
"I'm hailing a cab." Yokozawa broke their silence with this unexpected declaration.
Despite the fact he knew Takano didn't love him, he was now anxious to get back to the man's apartment; his appetite suddenly stirred by the promise of the flesh he so desperately hungered for, not caring that it would undoubtedly be served to him cold.
"We'll split the fare then." Takano watched Yokozawa's eyes light with surprise at the offer. After what he'd put the man through at the party and planned to put him through yet, it was the least he could do, besides his ass still ached and he didn't want to keep walking.
He watched as Yokozawa reached out and a taxi soon stopped.
Takano followed Yokozawa silently into the cab. The night was still relatively young and he still had several hours to dedicate to making more regrets before midnight struck and delivered him into the hours of another new and desperate day.
NEW AN:
Sana Lama Samaha- Glad you like the fire in this fic. Thank you again also for the lovely Uke Flu review for Cerberus.
OLD AN:
The last chapter will be all Akihiko and Hiroki and a brief omake. (I know you're shaking your heads at this… omake after all this angst… Yep, I shall endeavor a little bitter levity ;)
I wanted to thank Mini Blue Skirt, Joan Incarnate, The Black Flamingo 101, Soulfighter 17, Quorra Inc and Puppyfacetwo for all your comments on the last chapter which, based on the limited feedback, has to be my least popular lemon ever. (Sort of saddens me, as I think it is my favorite that I have written.) I am not sure again if this is due to the transgressive nature of this fic, the fact it messes with people's OTPs, or that this citrus was particularly bitter. (Writing a lemon sans love is no easy thing). But thank you again, my dear reader/reviewers, for your open minds and the thoughtful comments. They were very much appreciated.