I never thought I would be going to a flower shop frequently, but I was now. After that day when I felt like I seriously was going to have my life ruined, I have been going to see him almost daily. Because of my stupid actions, I kind of messed up his life a bit, so I wanted to help him out for some time. He, as in Sabo, the owner of the flower shop that is on the way back to my house. I go there all days except the weekends. I spend those with my girlfriend.
I had told her about what happened and she agreed with what I wanted to do, so now instead of going to her, I go help Sabo out. Sabo told me that I didn't have to come everyday or any day at all. He said I did nothing wrong, so I really didn't have to be there, but I didn't listen. I kept asking me to give me tasks, but he would constantly refuse for the first few weeks. Yeah… he was that stubborn.
.
"Hey… you already know that I will keep coming here, Sabo," I complained as I sat on the stool. I watched him flipping through a magazine in front of me. "Just start giving me tasks! I want to help…"
"Your existence already helped me lots," Sabo said to me in reply, not looking up from the magazine.
"Again with that answer… Come on," I kept complaining. I let out a huff and laid my chin onto the cold marble table. My eyes kept shut for a while as I thought of other ways to try to get him to tell me to do things. I peeked up at at him quietly and stared.
Sabo didn't really notice me. He just continued flipping through pages and sometimes looking over to this little notebook that was besides the magazine to write down some numbers. I looked to the magazine to see what it was about. It had flowers, fruits, vegetables and whatnot on it. I wondered what was so interesting about that. Then, my eyes went to the notebook where there were an array of numbers. It looked like he was adding and all these math things. There weren't any lines and crosses through numbers though. That meant that he was either just copying numbers, or doing all the math in his head. I gulped at how fast he jotted down the large numbers. He couldn't possibly have done all that in his head, right?
I let out a soft sigh before looking up at him now. He was wearing glasses. It looked good on him. I found out that he liked the color blue a lot. His outfits always had some blue in it. Rarely did it not. The tea cups were blue, some little boxes were blue, the cookies were always in a blue baggie… I stared at him and watched his eyes glancing from the magazine to the notebook.
His left eye didn't work, as in, it was blind. It took me long to find that out. How I did was that I would always peek from his left side and sometimes just stand there. It would take long for him to notice anything. Sometimes it would scare him though and he would swing whatever he was holding at me. I would then go home his a bruise. He was really strong, unexpectedly, but he did tell me his little story though. I never brought that up since he would always get so sad when anything reminded him about it.
He was always working so hard… "Hey… Pay attention to me," I ended up saying as I kept my head there on the counter. I really just wanted to help him out, but he won't ever let me. Just going off to try and help without instruction didn't sound like the best of ideas to me, since I knew nothing of flowers.
Sabo blinked once slowly. His long lashes then moved up to reveal the two-colored eyes looking right at me. My eyes widened when I saw him look at me. I was the one who told him to pay attention, so why was I so shocked? Sabo stared at me quietly before smiling, "isn't it cold? The counter…"
"Ah- eh? Um… It's alright," I replied quickly. My eyes darted away. I then took a deep breath and shut my eyes, "tell me to do something already…"
Sabo didn't reply to me for some time, which I expected. It was always like this. This time, however, I heard him move some things and close the magazine. I looked back at him to see what he was doing. He pushed the magazine to the side, then set his elbows on the table. The counter wasn't that big, so he was now pretty close to me. "Speak to me. Have some tea with me… Talk to me. Keep me company," he started saying. He moved a hand to my head and brushed back my bangs before he leaned down and gave me a kiss on my head. "I can tell you what I really want, but you won't be able to do that… So just do those," he said softly as he moved away.
I stared up at him quietly before opening my mouth, "stop kissing me on the head…" My cheeks were surely red again. Sabo would always give me kisses on my head when he was able to. I didn't understand why. It was probably because I was younger. Treating me like a kid. The first time he did it, I was jumping away and complaining. When I told him to stop treating me like a kid, he seemed a bit sad, but then he started doing it more. It didn't hurt me too much, so I let him do what he wanted. It was kind of nice, speaking honestly…
Sabo laughed softly and leaned his head on one of his hands. "I'm a stubborn one," he told me. I knew that already… I let out a huff and sat up. He didn't really tell me to do anything, but it was something.
"I'll come then. Continue coming here- except on weekends. As my punishment, I will come hang out with you. Though… I don't think it's really punishment, to be honest. I'll get you to tell me to do things eventually," I stated.
.
Somehow, I eventually got Sabo to tell me to do things. I may have either annoyed him to much, or got to know him enough through our talks and he got comfortable with me. Even though he started giving me tasks, it was nothing with the plants, which I found reasonable. I would sweep the floors inside and out. Sometimes, I would work the cashier if he was on the phone or doing something else. I didn't want payment because I was doing this for him, but he really wanted to give me something back. He ended up 'paying' me with cookies. Everyday I come in, I would clean and do a few things like organizing, then we would take our little break. The shop wasn't super active so we would practically have constant breaks, but after cleaning, he would go into his, still doorless, storage room and come out with tea and cookies. Then, we would talk about how our day was. It was mostly me talking about my school day, but sometimes Sabo would have a little story to tell me. One thing I noticed though… Whenever I mentioned my girlfriend, he would go quiet or change the subject. I guess he just really didn't like girls that much.
.
We sat at the counter whenever we had our little breaks. That was the only place one could sit after all. There were only three seats. One behind the counter where Sabo always sat, then two in front. I sat in one, obviously.
Sabo plopped the same amount of sugar cubes into my tea and stirred it. I've been coming for weeks, so knowing how much sugar I wanted was kind of expected by now. The thing is… he knew how much since the first day I had tea with him. He's never asked me again. I would think it's because he has a great memory, but he told me that his memory was a mess. He would forget a lot of things due to the incident. I wondered why he remembered everything about me then.
I took the cup when he pushed it over to me and took a sip after a few blows to cool it. "Ginger tea," he said softly as he watched me drink. He smiled and picked up his to take a sip.
"Mn… I thought so. I'm starting to learn my tea now," I chuckled before setting my cup down. He laughed as well. "Did you grow these too?"
Sabo nodded, "I did. They aren't here. I have them at home. For today, I cut some pieces and brought it." He hummed a soft tune and set his cup down. "Do you like it? It's good for you. Helps with stress too," he told me as he leaned closer to me.
"Did you bring this cause I had been complaining about school exams," I asked him as I set my hands on the stool cushion between my legs. I leaned closer to him. He looked at me with a blissful expression and nodded. "Well, thank you," I said with a grin. I then leaned back to drink some more. "Maybe I should get some for my girlfriend."
And with that, he went silent again. He leaned back and just picked up his cup. Without even blowing to cool, he tried to drink his still hot tea. Of course, that didn't go well. He flinched and quickly set the cup down to hold his mouth.
"Ah- hey! Are you alright? You have to blow to cool it," I said as I quickly got up. He had spun his chair to face away from me, so I walked around the counter to look at him. "Hey. It can't be that bad. You okay? Um, will ice help?"
Sabo was quiet for a bit before he mumbled from behind his gloved hands, "where in the world would you go to get ice…"
"I would run to the store to buy some."
"With your own money?"
"With my own money."
"Why?"
"Why not?"
Sabo looked up at me before sighing and setting down his hands. "Oh, Ace… You treat me well. You shouldn't… I'm not the person you should treat so well," he told me softly.
I watched him as he spoke. He was getting all sad again. This always happened when I spoke about her. He says these things to me like he's degrading himself… I didn't understand why. "What do you mean… You got hurt. I care about my friends you know," I told him with a huff.
That didn't seem to make it better. Sabo froze for a second once I said that to him. "Friends… Oh… yes, of course," he mumbled. "Right…"
"Do you not want to be frie-"
Sabo suddenly shot up and walked passed me to the storage room, "I haven't given you your cookies! I'll get them!"
I stared at him with wide eyes as he went. The storage room finally had a door and he used it a whole lot. He would always run in there sometimes and shut himself in. Every time I mentioned my girlfriend he would for sure do this. I really should stop talking about her to him. 'I think he likes you.' What she said would always come up and I would think about that for the whole time he shuts himself in, but I would never believe it. I probably did not want to believe it either since I wouldn't know how to deal with that. This relationship we had now, I did not want it to end. I had a girlfriend, so I couldn't possibly…
.
Even with those uneasy times, I still continued to see him. There was once where I asked him if he wanted me to leave, but he instantly denied that. He clasped my hand tightly and told me not to go. So, I continue to go to him even though I hate making him sad. I wish I could decide what the reason was or just ask him, but I never could. To me, he was a friend… for most of the time. Gradually, I felt that title unfit. Eventually, he was constantly on my mind again. What my girlfriend told to me… I wanted to find if it was true. I had been thinking about it for too long and I wanted to know. The risk of having this current relationship crumble was apparently worth it.
.
"Like this?" I patted the damp soil with my fingers, then looked to my left where Sabo stood. He examined what I did and nodded.
"Like so. It's that simple. The hardest part is just the amount of water you need to give to them, how many times to give it to them, as well as how much sun they would need," Sabo said to me.
I nodded and smiled. The flower we planted was a hibiscus flower. It was my favorite. I had asked him to teach me how to tend and grow flowers. He surprisingly agreed and then asked me what flower I liked. I didn't know much of flowers at all, but I knew a name of one only. It was my mother's favorite flower, so that made it my favorite as well. Sabo was quite amazed that I knew a name. He told me he didn't have any on him and he would have to order some which would take some time, but he ended up having them somehow today.
Sabo hummed and set a hand on my shoulder, "it's the first flower you planted. You shou-"
"No," I suddenly said before me could finish. I looked up at him and grinned, "it's the first flower WE planted." That's right. I didn't plant this on my own, so I corrected him.
Sabo stared at me with those large eyes he had before looking away. I felt like he was about to run to his storage room again so I turned my chair and grabbed his arms. He jolted and tried to get away from me. I knew that if he tried, he could easily toss me off and he could run off again, but he didn't.
"Hey, Sabo," I started. Just by a say of his name, he flinched and started glancing everywhere. I watched him start to get embarrassed and want to hid his face with his hands. "Lately… I've been thinking," I murmured. My grip tightened slightly on his forearms. Today, I was going to speak whatever was on my mind, is what I told myself.
His blond bangs slipped from his ear and covered his eyes a bit. He really wanted to cover his face, didn't he… "A-Ace, please let me go," he said to me quietly.
"Should I go then," I asked.
As I expected, he instantly looked at me and shook his head, "ah- no… Please don't go."
I looked at his eyes before biting my lips together. "How do you feel about me, Sabo… Tell me. I need to know, Sabo," I demanded. "Sabo… She… told me that you may like me. Is that true? You finding me… interesting. Is that-"
I had spoken what I was thinking, but speaking of 'her' really wasn't the best idea. Sabo's embarrassed face, turned into one of sadness, yet something of irritation. "She. She. She. She," he said coldly. I felt that he was also now saying what was on his mind, or maybe what he had always held in. He shook his head and kept his eyes away, "if you keep talking about 'her' don't think about me. Ace, I know you know. You- are and idiot. So long, did it take you to figure out a sliver of how I feel, but by now, I know… you know now, Ace."
"I- I wanted to make sure," I replied loudly as I tugged at his arms to pull him closer as I stood up.
Sabo looked at me before shaking his head again. "Then why do you stay here?! If you want to make sure… Then- no. No. No, it is not true," he hissed before he hung his head. I was shocked at the answer. For a second, I was utterly confused, but Sabo spoke again. "I don't like you, Ace… I don't like you at all," he told me as his body tried to pull away again. "I love you… but I know I can't have you," he finally said.
My eyes widened and I let go of his arms, letting him take steps away from me. The answer I expected was something like this. I thought I was ready, but I guess I wasn't.
"Ace, for these couple of months you have been with me, I thank you," Sabo whispered. "It's late. Head home now. Tomorrow… It's the weekend. Go on. Tomorrow, she will wait for you. Do not think of me… ever again, for your sake," he told me before wandering off to start getting his things to head home.
I just stood there thinking. Now, I wondered again if it was worth it. My shoulders dropped before I started out of the shop. That risk, I knew it happened. Our relationship we had was gone. As I ran home, I persuaded myself that it was over. I told myself that I won't be able to face him again.