Thanks for the positivity! By the way I'm sorry I haven't been able to reply to any reviews recently ill reply soon as I can… and I'm planning something special for Michonne so I'm doing her last, enjoy Merle!
The Walking Collection – Merle
"Today guys we have Merle!" Billy Ray Cyrus Achy Brakey plays "Merle?! Merle? Where the hell is he?"
Merle is still backstage "No, no, no I can't do that." Says Merle.
"Merle, you have to go on!" Says the Director "It's your time to shine, and be fabulous."
"Have you seen how many people are out there? And people still think I'm racist!"
"It's because you are racist!"
"I didn't ask for your life story."
"Just go!" The Director pushes Merle out on to stage and he awkwardly sits next to Jeremy.
"Hey Merle." Says Jeremy, but he just looks puzzled and stares outwards.
"Merle?" Questions Jeremy, he gives out a whimper/laugh.
Merle faints and hits his head on Jeremy's desk on the way down, Michonne throws a bottle at him "He's the racist one here." She says, the audience nod their heads and agree.
"Okay since this isn't working out, I'll try something new!" The lights flash on and off a Jeremy is wearing a blonde wig with a pink bow on it "Hey all you fat pieces of ugly shit! It's me FabJenFoodpornLoveitbigHungryBarbieMcSwag21!"
"Oh god." Says Daryl.
"Today I'm going to be showing you all the stuff I bought from the streets today! I'm basically saying I'm rich and you're poor! You also get sad cos you're poor. Hash tag like!" Jeremy/Jen pulls out a bag that's labelled Crap from the streets "Okay so first I got a pregnancy test cos you know; I don't want to end up like Lori! Dead! Hahahaaaaa!"
"Are we still watching this?" Asks Rick.
"Those tests costed 99 pence! Damn you know I love a deal! Oh my god I sounded black… Ewww! Although if its only 99 pence you're probably pregnant."
"Who does this bitch think she is?" Says Michonne.
"Oh wait I just need to read some notes that I made, I wanna make sure I have it all here." Jeremy/Jen pulls out a note pad and starts to read it she turns over the page and on the back it says You're better than them "Okay done!"
"This is almost as bad as that time when I fucked Shane!" Says the Andrea.
"I also got a plate that has a picture of Jesus's last supper on it, nothing says delicious quite like that! I also got some erasers that have picture of Miley Cyrus on it; ironic since she'll be dead soon, actually I don't really think that's ironic! Hahahahaaaa!"
"I only said it once!" Merle springs to his feet, Jeremy/Jen gasps then the lights go on and off. Jeremy is back!
"So Merle, care to explain what just happened?"
"Well, I saw a bright light… Then I saw Michonne… Then I saw Jesus… Then I saw Miley Cyrus's Adore You video which bought me back to life or shocked me back."
"Sound like you has been through a lot, what can I do to make you happy?"
"You could rip off your skin suit and have Natalie Portman burst out of your bloody remains!"
"I can't to that Merle."
"Not even a little Natalie Portman?"
"Sorry…"
"Well that sucks!"
"Although I can give you a pregnancy test that did cost 99pence, would that be good?"
"I do feel a little bloated…"
"That means you're pregnant! I bet its Andrea's!"
"It's true!"
"Moving on, so Merle tells us something!"
"I have a secret fetish over, Natalie Portman, sometimes I think about her in the shower."
"Why Natalie Portman?"
"I don't know, it's like asking why Ghandi fought against racism, he didn't do it to make the human race better, and he did it because it was convenient at the time. You know what I'm saying?"
"No, I don't think anyone knows."
"Hey have you heard that new Miley song, feeling myself?"
"Oh no…!"
"Yeah, yeah! I have its so catchy it's draining my soul. I don't think I can go for much longer, every time I hear it I die, yet want to start doing some Miley dancing! Do you kniw how that makes me feel? Not good Jeremy, not good…."
"Well I think we will end I there. Bye Merle!"
"Bye everyone!" He shouts, Feelin Myslef starts to play as he walks off stage and he begins to scream.