The Blonde and the Bandit 7
Art
The Production or Expression of what is Beautiful (especially visually), Appealing, or of more than Ordinary Significance
"Art is a lie that makes us realize truth." –Pablo Picasso
(Warning- Sexual References)
The Bandit smirked at the Blonde.
"Okay, Brat. Let's see what you got."
Sasori ran at Deidara.
The Blonde jumped back, pushing his foot against the tree behind him. He did a flip in mid air, landing behind Sasori. The Bandit ducked low, sweeping his left foot to trip Deidara.
Deidara jumped back to dodge the attack. Sasori quickly straightened up.
It was the Blonde's turn to attack. He ran at the red head. Deidara moved to the left and punched at Sasori. The Bandit grabbed his fist before it collided with his face. Before Sasori knew what was happening, Deidara had swung his left leg behind Sasori's. The red head fell over onto his back.
It was Sasori's turn to react. He grabbed Deidara's leg, pulling him down as well. They rolled on the floor a few times, stopping with Sasori pinning Deidara's arms down at his sides, straddling the Blonde.
"You've improved a lot, Brat. I was actually half trying that time…Are you okay?"
Deidara was panting faintly, his face tinted red. Sasori was a bit freaked out at the glazed expression the Blonde was giving him. The Blonde frowned in confusion, closing his eyes.
"Danna~" Deidara practically moaned. "C-Can you move y-you kn-knee, un~?"
Sasori blinked and looked down. Whoops.
Sasori took his knee off of Deidara's crotch.
"Ah…Sorry, accident."
Deidara nodded in relief.
"Thanks."
He sighed and the redness slowly disappeared from his face.
"Anyway. I have to teach you some stuff."
He let go of the Blonde and stood up, holding a hand out to Deidara.
Deidara took it and Sasori helped him up.
"So, uh…What to teach you...Well, what do you want to know?"
Deidara thought for a second.
"Why do you think art is Eternal, un?"
Sasori blinked at him, taken aback by the question. The Bandit then smirked.
"Eternal beauty lasts forever, for generations upon generations to marvel at its glamour. That is art. Something that stands the test of time gracefully and majestically."
Deidara nodded.
"I think art is transitory. Fleeting, un. Something that disappears as soon as it is born, leaving behind only the memory of how beautiful its devastation was. Explosions, Danna, I love a real Bang."
"…Mercy on us all if you ever get a Magnum."
Deidara smirked at him.
"Yep. Bang, un."
Deidara made a cocking gun motion with his hand. Sasori rolled his eyes, smirking once more.
"So, what else do you want to know?"
Deidara thought for a few seconds.
"Where do babies come from, un?"
"WHAT?"
Sasori stared at Deidara with a shocked expression. The Blonde shrugged.
"I asked Konan yesterday but she said to ask you instead."
Sasori grumbled.
"Damn Konan."
"I know that girls have babies after they have sex or get raped but that is it, un."
Sasori blinked at him.
"Yeah."
"But how, un?"
"You expect me to know? I've been in Akatsuki since I was 10!"
"So you don't know how sex makes a girl pregnant?"
Sasori shook his head. "Not really. Now, changing the topic-"
"Wait, un…does that mean you've never had sex?"
Sasori glared at him.
"You know very well that I have had sex, Brat."
"…Yeah, un. But besides Rape. What about with a girl?"
"No, if you must know I've never had sex with a girl. But don't get the wrong idea, I'm as straight as they get."
"But Danna..." Deidara circled around Sasori, examining him. "You don't look straight. Your back is bending a bit inwards…"
"THAT ISN'T WHAT I MEANT BRAT!"
Sasori turned on his heel and stormed off back towards camp. Deidara blinked.
"Was it something I said, un?"
-x-
The Blonde looked over at the Albino.
"Hey, Hidan?"
Deidara and Hidan sat on the river bank, throwing pebbles across the surface.
"Yeah?"
"What does Sasori mean by the word 'Straight'? I know it means that a surface is even, but Sasori said he was straight. I informed him that he wasn't straight, and he got all angry and defensive at me, un."
Hidan burst out laughing, falling backwards. He was rolling on the floor, holding onto his sides.
"THAT IS JUST TOO FUCKING FUNNY!"
Hidan continued laughing much to Deidara's confusion.
"HIDAN!"
Hidan started coughing, still laughing, but managed to sit back up. He wiped a tear from of his eye.
"Simply fucking priceless! Now, what did you wanna fucking know again?"
"What does 'Straight' mean, un?"
"It means you don't fucking like other guys! Or, if you are a girl then you don't like other girls!"
"So Sasori doesn't like me? Or you? Or any of us, except for Konan?"
"No fucking way! He does like all of us! Well, some of us more than others. But he doesn't like other guys in a Sexual way."
"…Sexual? So like for sex?"
"Bingo!"
"Are you straight, un?"
Hidan snorted. "Fuck no! I'm Bi!"
"…Bi, un?"
"Yeah! Bisexual! In other words, I like everyone!"
"Oh, un…What about someone who likes guys and they are a guy?"
"They are called 'Gay'."
"'Gay'? Oh! Sasori mentioned that a few days ago! He said he wasn't Gay!"
"See? And he got offended when you said he wasn't straight, because he isn't fucking gay!"
"Oh, un! That makes sense!"
"Well?"
"Well what, un?"
"What about you?"
"I don't know. I don't like anyone sexually."
Hidan smirked.
"You sure about that?"
Deidara nodded.
"Come on, Dude! Everyone is fucking attracted to something!"
"I like explosions, un."
Hidan face palmed.
"I didn't fucking mean it like that. Do you like girls?"
"I like Konan."
"I meant in a sexual way!"
"Oh. Well, I don't know if I like anyone in a sexual way…How do I know if I like someone in a sexual way?"
"Lust and Desire."
"Lust and Desire?"
Hidan smirked wide at him.
"In other words, you want them to fuck you senseless."
"…Oh, un…Makes sense…I guess."
-x-
The Bandit gave a nod to Pein.
"Well, Sasori, what do you reckon?"
Sasori ran a hand through his hair.
"He has certainly improved greatly on his close combat skills. He is also getting better at dodging and thinking like a Bandit. I would say that at the moment he is a Dog in Sheep's Clothing, but he is close to becoming a Wolf."
Pein nodded.
"Thank you, Sasori. You haven't been too rough on him, have you?"
"No."
"Good. We don't want a repeat of what happened 10 years ago."
Sasori nodded.
"Well, good job Sasori. His initiation will be tomorrow morning. Then after you show him the ropes, we will need to get to the mansion. Tomorrow is the day of the raid."
The Bandit nodded once more.
"Yes, Sir."
Sasori turned and disappeared out of the tent. He was faintly surprised to see Deidara waiting for him outside.
"Hey Danna."
"What is it, Brat?"
Deidara looked down at his feet.
"I'm sorry, un. I didn't understand what you meant by straight. I didn't mean to call you gay." The Blonde looked back up at the Bandit, apologetic expression. "I didn't know, un. You can hit me if you want."
Deidara put his head back down, bracing himself for the pain.
It didn't come.
"I forgive you, Brat."
Deidara's eyes widened.
"You aren't going to hit me, un?"
"Why would I? I'm in a good mood, and it seems to me that you've learnt your lesson."
Deidara looked up at Sasori to see that the Bandit was smirking down at him.
"But…" Deidara frowned, confused. "In the mines if I had done something so rude they would have beat me."
Sasori grabbed Deidara's chin and pulled him up so they were face to face. They were so close that Deidara could feel the Bandit's breath against his lips. He took in the sweet cider scent of Sasori's breath. What was this weird feeling?
"Deidara. You aren't in the mines any more."
For some reason, Deidara wanted nothing more than to close that space between their mouths. But the Blonde knew that if he did, it would be as if he were signing his own death warrant. So Deidara just stared into Sasori's muddy brown orbs, managing a soft nod.
"Thank you, Sasori Danna."
"Don't worry about it."
Sasori let go of Deidara's chin.
"Now I need to go clean my guns for tomorrow."
The Bandit walked passed the Blonde, completely unfazed.
Deidara just stood there, not moving a single muscle. A few minutes ticked by. He suddenly shook his head to clear it. Deidara turned around and walked back to the main camp site. He sat down on one of the logs around the fire place, even though the fire wasn't burning at this time of day.
"Well…" Deidara looked up at the blue sky above him. Soon it would be night again, and the moon would be almost full. "Desire and Lust…Lust and Desire…Me and Sasori…Sasori and I…The Blonde and the Bandit…" He sighed and looked down at the charred remains of the fire. "I guess that probably means that I'm not straight, un…"
-x-
No you definitely aren't, Dei XD Lolz But we love you for it!
Stupid Deidara didn't know what Gay and Straight meant XD
Horray =D Hidan loves all of us!
Awww, Deidara, you should have kissed him XD Lolz
Anyway, Hope you likey ^O^
Please Review/Comment!