A/N: I have nothing, I own nothing, I am nothing...Oh wait! I'm a Marshmallow!

Chapter 7

Veronica entered the apartment at two in the morning, tip toeing as quietly as possible. The sight that greeted her was startling, to say the least; Logan Echolls sprawled out on her couch fast asleep with papers strewn around him.

Unable to contact Charlie the past couple of weeks, she'd had no idea his and Logan's friendship had progressed to the slumber party stage. In the dim light, Veronica studied Logan's sleeping form and noted how much younger he looked when he was asleep. Time had thinned a bit of the roundness from his cheeks, but at this moment he reminded her of the twelve-year-old boy she had met. Back when he could smile without a trace of irony.

Weariness overtook her and she treaded softly toward her bedroom, stopping first to remove her shoes, put them in one hand and lift her suitcase with the other. The bedroom was dark but, not wanting to wake Charlie with the light, she stripped and crawled into bed, tentatively curling her body around his. Sleep claimed her within seconds.

When she awoke the clock said it was only seven. She yawned and stretched, the intake of air redolent with the scent of freshly brewed coffee. Charlie was still sound asleep beside her. Her confusion turned to understanding when she remembered finding Logan on the couch.

Quickly, she pulled on her yoga pants, a favorite cardigan, and a t-shirt before she slipped out of the bedroom. She found Logan in the kitchen. His back was to the doorway as he stood and looked out the window, sipping his coffee.

"Good morning," she said, causing him to jump and whirl around.

"Veronica! What the hell are you doing here?" Logan demanded.

She frowned as she spoke, "Um, I live here. What's your excuse?"

Logan's stiff posture belied the brief smile he offered. "Sorry, you just surprised me. Charlie and I have been working on his book night and day so I've crashed here a few times, mostly by accident. It won't happen again." He put his mug down by the sink and made to move past her, toward the living room.

Veronica reached out and put a hand on his arm, and he drew back as if she had touched him with a branding iron. As he backed up a couple of steps, he shoved his hands in his back pockets and anger surfaced fleetingly in his features. She wasn't surprised to see it. She tried to use her voice to sooth, though she knew it wouldn't help.

"Logan, its fine. You're as welcome here as any of our other friends. I'm actually glad to see you."

Their close proximity in the small kitchen allowed her to take tally of the changes seven years had wrought. His face was slightly more weathered, but it just lent him an air of rakishness. His morning shadow was fuller than the last time she'd seen it, but everything else was the same. His shoulders were broad and his figure trim and muscled, obvious evidence of the active lifestyle he'd always lived. His hair was the same light brown with a slight curl that she had loved to run her fingers through. His eyes were the still chocolate brown and served as windows to his every emotion, if you knew him as well as she did. This morning they became guarded as he tried to hide the anger that was emanating from his every pore.

"Well, we'll have to play old home week some other time. I'm actually late for something. Tell Charlie I'll call him later." He made to go through the doorway again but, when she wouldn't move, he stopped and looked at her, his expression cold.

Veronica subtly squared her feet to strengthen her stance, determined not to let him leave until he'd heard her out. She pleaded, "Logan, I know I don't have any right to ask, but I owe you an apology and an explanation that is long overdue. Will you please just give me five minutes?"

Logan studied her a moment, the defensive posture not lost on him. Apparently he weighed his options, then stepped back, crossed his arms and leaned against the wall behind him. "I would have given you as much time as you needed seven years ago. Now, you get two minutes, but only for Charlie's sake."

Veronica nodded, acknowledging the concession. "Fair enough. Ok, I know that when I left for my internship things were…precarious with us. Then I made the unilateral decision to end us, and didn't even have the courage to come home or even call you. It was selfish and cowardly and if I got one Do Over in my life that would be it. I'm truly sorry, Logan. You deserved so much more from me."

Logan was quiet, as if waiting for something else. After a long moment he said, "But…?"

"But what?" she asked with a frown. She'd worked hard on the wording to that apology, saving it for when she could deliver it in person. Now he was brushing it aside, like it was inconsequential?

The anger was so evident in his voice she cringed a bit, and hoped Charlie wouldn't wake up. "But where's the reason, the justification for doing that? You were one of the few people in my life I thought I could count on. And then you just cut me out of your life. You are right, I deserved more. I still do. Like a reason. And you're down to one minute."

He was right. He was owed and explanation. She spoke fast, the words tumbling out of her. "There was a reason, Logan. What happened with Gorya Sorokin scared the hell out of me. In high school, when that fed kidnapped me at gunpoint, you came at him outside the Camelot and started pounding on him. You didn't know if he was armed, or alone, or what. Then at the River Stix you rescued me from the Fitzpatricks by comng in with an unloaded gun. In college you got yourself thrown in jail, and risked criminal charges, to beat up Mo and Mercer for what they did to me. Then you gave a pounding to a mobster for publicizing a sex tape I inadvertently made with someone else."

Incredulously, Logan demanded, "I loved you. What was I supposed to do?"

Veronica shook her head at him. She felt her stomach do a flip at his admission, and determined not to hold anything back. He deserved those words, after all these years.

"I loved you too. But, when it came to me, you lost all sense of self preservation. My internship at the FBI reinforced that that was what I wanted to do with my life. Which meant I was following a path that would intentionally put me in dangerous situations. Explain to me how that would have worked with the dynamics of our relationship?"

They stared at each other for a long moment, then Logan gave in to divert his gaze to the floor.

She took advantage of his silence to continue. "I still think I made the right right choice, but how I went about it was very wrong. And I'm so sorry." Her voice got softer as she next admitted, "The truth is, if I saw you or spoke to you at that time I'm not sure I could have gone through with it." Now it was she who was giving the floor an unprecedented amount of attention.

Logan sighed, one hand on his hip, while the other reached up to run a hand through his hair. "I'm pretty damn sure I wouldn't have let you. But Veronica, you have to know, it was about the worst thing anyone ever did to me. And you know that's saying a lot."

Veronica nodded, a solitary tear escaping her eye before she forced the others back. "I know it was. And I am so sorry. It's not an excuse, but I was in a really bad place at that time. So much happened after Lilly's murder, and it all caught up with me. Running away just seemed easier at the time." She pointed the thumbs of both hands at herself and said, "Coward."

He looked at her pensively before asking, "Are you happy? I mean with your job, Charlie, living in New York. Are you happy?"

She nodded, relieved that he hadn't stormed out yet. "Yes, with all of it. But, I've missed having you in my life. I can't tell you how many times I've wanted to look you up in our database, or call you and ask about your life."

Logan became agitated and shoved his hands in his pockets. His voice got just a little louder as he asked, "Well then why didn't you? I can understand breaking up with me, but dumping me was the worst part of it. Do you know what it would have meant, if you had reached out? A phone call, a birthday or Christmas card? Something, anything to let me know you still gave a damn." The pain and hurt were so evident on his face that she felt a huge stab of guilt.

Veronica stepped a little closer to him, hoping he saw the truth in her eyes. "I did give a damn, Logan. I never stopped. But I guess...at first it was too soon. And then, it had been too long. I didn't know how to start. But if it makes any difference, I'm letting you know now. Do you think we could find our way back to being friends?"

He studied her for what felt like the longest time, his expression becoming skeptical. "Did you really not look me up? All those FBI resources at your fingertips and you didn't let your fingers do the walking?"

She rolled her eyes at that and gave a self-deprecating grin. "I came close, many times. It would have been sooo easy. But I didn't even Google you, or ask Mac and Wallace about you when you were all still at Hearst. It just…it felt like I had no right."

"That had to be the first time that ever stopped you," Logan mocked, and snorted. "But thanks, for at least giving me that. I honestly didn't think you had it in you." With a heavy sigh he offered the toke from the peace pipe she'd been hoping for.

"Look. Charlie and I are almost done with the final edit of his book but are working together nonstop until then. It's going to be a lot harder to keep up our pace if I'm trying to avoid you. So how about we make a deal."

"Terms?" Veronica asked.

"I'll consider your explanation and apology if you make me breakfast to go with the coffee I brewed. And you tell me why the hell Charlie calls you Jezzy. I've been asking him and he won't tell me. It's kind of been driving me nuts." Logan's conspiratorial grin gave her hope they could bridge the gap between them.

Veronica felt a surge of hope at the familiar smile. She laughed low and said, "Breakfast I can do. As for the other…" She poked her head into the living room to make sure they were still alone, and then cupped a hand around her mouth before whispering exaggeratedly, "It's short for Jezebel."

Logan cocked an eyebrow at her. "Maybe Charlie does know what he's gotten himself into with you."

As she put together a feast of blueberry pancakes, scrambled eggs and fruit salad, Veronica began the questions she had been dying to ask. "So, it seems you're up to speed on my life, but I know nothing about yours, except your job."

Logan sat at the table, watching her work and sipping his coffee. "What do you want to know?"

"Everything, as usual." After sharing a smile, she returned to mixing the pancake batter, determined to do justice to her part of the deal. "School. Did you stay at Hearst through graduation?"

With a nod Logan answered, "Yeah. The summer after sophomore year I got my own internship at a publishing house. Once I figured out that was I wanted to do, school became a priority. Really cut into my surfing time though."

Veronica glanced up at him before pouring the batter into the griddle. "Did you and Dick room together at the Grand the whole time?"

"No." Logan shook his head. "the first tier of my trust fund was running out so I had to get a cheap apartment. Once I turned twenty-one and the rest of the money came through, I was so buried at school it was just easier to stay there until I graduated."

"And after graduation?" Veronica asked, moving on to start the bacon while the pancakes browned.

"I moved to L.A. when I got a job with the same publishing house. I worked my way up through the ranks and got transferred here, thank god. I never want to live in that cesspool again." His expression was bitter as he spoke of L.A.

Veronica queried, "Can I ask…"

Logan chuckled knowingly. "Romantic interests? There was someone for a while, but it didn't last. Other than that I've been kind of busy building a career."

They shared a companionable silence as she finished the cooking, then brought the food to the table. When they started dishing up, Veronica worked up the nerve to ask. "What about you Logan? Are you happy?"

His pause as he was cutting up his pancake was almost imperceptible. Almost. "I'm as happy as it's possible for me to be at this point in my life. Work is my focus right now, and has been for a long time; I love what I do. I like New York, mostly because it's not L.A., and it seems I'm even making friends. Like Charlie," he said pointedly, just to let her know he hadn't totally forgiver her yet. "And I'm feasting on some fan-fucking-tastic blueberry pancakes. Good god Ronnie, where did you learn to cook like this?"

"Le Cordon Bleu." Veronica rolled her eyes, the smiled. Before they started dating, Logan had called her Ronnie all the time. The nickname brought back a lot of pleasant memories. "My dad taught me. He said I had to learn to cook for him as the king of his castle expects from his wenches, but really because he was tired of trying to fill me up."

"And how is the Oregonian sheriff these days? Charlie told me about the career change." Their talk moved into playing catch up and easier topics with fewer landmines.

Veronica put down her fork after using her final bite of pancake to mop up the syrup. "So you said you're doing the final edit of the book. That was incredibly fast; no wonder you've already made editor. Congratulations, by the way."

Logan nodded his acknowledgement. "Thanks, but I don't always work quite this fast. Working on Charlie's book has kept us both busy. Now that you're home, and the book is about done, I may have to start having a social life. Maybe even take out my boogie woogie shoes and trip the light fantastic."

She'd missed his wry humor and how he peppered his sentences with pop culture references. With a smile Veronica joked, "I thought you donated the boogie woogie shoes to that charity drive senior year? Or were those your boots that were made for walking? I forget."

Veronica had a thought and, before he could answer, a grin broke across her face. "By the way, could you try that sentence out on Charlie sometime when I'm around? I'd love to see the look on his face when he's trying to figure out what in the hell you're talking about." She carried her plate over and put it in the sink, then grabbed a mug and poured herself a cup of coffee.

"Humph," Logan snorted. "Yeah, our boy isn't one to pick up on movie quotes and song lyrics. No reaction at all when I told him I was late for a meeting with Abe Froman."

Veronica whirled around to face him. "He doesn't know The Sausage King of Chicago? That's it; Ferris Bueller is next on the list for our movie education nights." She came back and settled at the table with her mug. "Which are rare, he's not a big fan of movies. He came home when I was watching Top Gun a few months ago and wouldn't shut up about it for days. Let's just say, he was not impressed."

"Can you blame him? How Tom Cruise even has a career is beyond me."

"I know, right?! Anyway, he is even less a fan of those who make movies. Did he ever tell you about the meeting with a producer who was trying to purchase the screen rights to his first book?" The anticipation of sharing one of her favorite Charlie stories brought a mischievous grin to her face.

At Logan's shake of the head she continued. "The guy made the mistake of bringing a prospective script so Charlie could see all the changes they had made to the story. I thought I was going to have to handcuff him to keep him from strangling the man! Once he got done yelling, and the producer took off running, we were politely asked to leave the Four Seasons and not return until a fifth season came along." They were both laughing by this time.

When their laughter had settled into the occasional chuckle, Logan said. "Veronica, thank you for the breakfast, which was outstanding. And for everything you said earlier, you made some good points. I'm not saying that I'm not still mad, but it helps to finally understand."

"Well, thanks for understanding."

"I'm trying. And as my first gesture of forgiveness, I'll tell you where the chocolate croissants I bought are stashed, Logan teased.

At the mention of more food her face lit up and Veronica said, "Logan, I think this is the new beginning of a beautiful friendship."

A/N: Finally some LoVe interaction! While I can't wait to get to the fun bantering moments, as well as the angst, they needed to build a bridge to get there. So, for those having a hard time with Charlie, I promise good things are in store! I like Charlie and I think he deserves he due considering what he's up against. As always, reviews feed my soul and fuel my writing.

As for the 101 Reasons We Love Logan list, thanks for the PMs! I have to agree with you Nicole, the Twirly Kiss made for some beautiful screen moments. And Delind – you're right, who wouldn't want someone as protective as Logan?! For me, I love that he always says what he feels, and he feels so much. What about you? PM me, put in your review, skywrite it, send a message in the bottle. However you get it to me I'll add it to the list which is published as the last chapter.