CHAPTER 7
"No! Listen… what if this was meant to be? That I lost my memory... so that you and I can give it another try? Our second chance, James…"
Shaking his head, James put down the glass of fire whiskey he's been drinking. It has been two hours since he left Rock Point and now he's in his living room, sitting comfortably in his favorite chair, sipping his third glass of whisky and reminiscing the scene that had played earlier. Somehow, Lily's pleading face refuse to leave his thoughts. The way she looked at him, full of love and regret, was haunting. It has been so long since she looked at him that way and it reminded him of their past fate, a fate they have learned to accept a long time ago.
Or so he thought. He absentmindedly touched his lips and remembered the way Lily had kissed him. Her touch still has that effect on him somehow and it bothered him.
"Hey, you've arrived."
James hastily withdraws his finger from his lips. "Uh.. yeah"
Sirius emerged from the shadows, his face smiling upon seeing his friend's torn face. Something must've happened and he's eager to know why. He leaned over the fireplace and both men spend a moment looking at the crackling fire. "So. How did it go?"
"Not according to what I had planned." James mumbled as he handed Sirius a glass of fire whiskey.
"Expect nothing less from Lily" Sirius commented. "You told her about the two of you?"
"Yeah"
"And?"
James shifted in his seat, uncomfortable in sharing this information. "What do you expect? She's confused and angry. She doesn't understand how and I don't know how to explain it to her. Not when I can't tell her everything." He sighed.
Sirius nodded. "I assume you also told her about the other one?"
"What other one, Padfoot?" James sounded irritated and Sirius knew he hit a spot. "You mean her husband?"
"Yeah. That other one" Sirius rolled his eyes.
James shook his head, too tired to argue with his best friend. He knew where Sirius is heading and he isn't biting it. "Lily just stopped talking to me and locked herself in the bedroom after. She said she wanted to be alone" James stared back at the fire, remembering how exactly Lily reacted. "What's weird is she didn't say anything, not even cry. I'd rather see her cry or get mad at me than nothing at all. It was scary. It's not like her."
"I know what you mean" Sirius smirked as he gulped down his whiskey, remembering a crying Petunia the night before. "But I'd prefer the silent type than the crying and scratching one—"
"Scratching?"
"Nothing" James was lost in the fire again and Sirius knew something's up."What's wrong, Prongs?"
"What? Nothing"
"Usually when you say nothing it means something. Spill it out"
James looked at his best friend warily. "She kissed me." He whispered so softly that only them could hear. Sirius froze. He had expected James to say Lily attacked him. It's an impulse that runs in their family somehow. He wasn't expecting this.
"She kissed you or you two kissed?" James looked unbelievably at Sirius. "…cause, you know, there's a difference."
"She kissed me" James frowned at his accusation. "Nothing more. Why would you even suggest something like that?"
Sirius smirked. "The fact that her lips even reached your lips tells how little you have self control, my friend"
James pretended he didn't hear him. "I should've seen it. I was caught off guard."
"You do realize that this makes things all the more complicated?" Sirius said and James nodded. "So?"
"So what?"
"What did you feel?"
James shrugged. "What am I supposed to feel?"
"You tell me" Sirius said. "Prongs, I'm your best friend. You know you can trust me"
"I've got nothing to tell, Padfoot" James gulped his last glass of whiskey. "And you should stop jumping into conclusion. Lily and I have long resolved this. What happened to her might've complicated it somehow but it'll be over soon…" James faded.
"You sounded like it was a bad thing" James snapped at his friend's comment but Sirius continued. "I mean, Lily was your ex-wife afterall. Surely?"
James had enough. "Stop it. We are not talking about this, Padfoot" He eyed his friend. "And I know what you're trying to do. I'm not gonna fall for it this time" He knew Sirius would make this side remarks. He shouldn't have told him in the first place.
"I get it. Geez." Sirius held his hands up in surrender. He's bound to lose this argument anyway. It's not worth trying especially not tonight.
"And not a word about this" James whispered, glaring at Sirius after making sure the coast is clear.
"Okay" Sirius shrugged and James knew he can never be too sure. "I mean it, Padfoot. The last time I told you to keep quiet, you ended up telling somehow and it got me in a lot of trouble"
Sirius smiled at the memory. "Hey, it's not my fault girls dig the most popular Professional Quidditch player today. Don't even try to deny it. Captain of both the Holy Harpies and the Quidditch National Team and two time Quidditch Player of the Year?" Sirius whistled. "Have you checked Witch Weekly lately? You've been the cover for like three months now. And the things that Skeeter woman have written about you—"
"Spare me" James rolled his eyes.
Lily didn't let James see her cry. She locked herself in one of the bedroom and sent James away, who half-heartedly obliged. But unknown to him, Lily cried all day. She didn't even know she's capable of crying like that. The sheer thought of her family broken hurts Lily like she never thought possible. What happened to her and James doesn't make sense at all. How come she let this happen to them. Everything was perfect back then. They were happy.
And what kind of mother was she to make such a terrible life for Harry? How can she deny him the right to a happy family?
Lily clutched the pillow she's been hugging as anger and sadness consumed her every thought. She then looked at the wedding ring in her finger. She noticed it was a different ring, different from the one she remembered wearing on her wedding day. Lily thought about her supposed husband and felt goose bumps. She really can't imagine herself with another man besides James. Somehow, she felt disgusted and dirty. She took the ring off her finger and tossed it outside the window, hoping the ring would take away with it the pain and sorrow she felt at the moment.
With dried tears, Lily was now numb. She's been looking absentmindedly out the wide window for hours now. She didn't want to think anymore. Thinking hurts. She wants nothing but to sit in bed and stare at the sunset.
"Lily? Open up" A knock came so softly. "We have to talk" But Lily didn't care. The knocking continued and there was a commotion outside.
"Stand aside!" An angry voice said.
"Don't! Let her open up—" The door came down anyway and Lily sighed. It wasn't even locked. Two women then entered the room heavily. One, with brown hair shorter than Lily's, kicked the door aside as they approached her. The other one was pale looking with long black hair and noticeably rosy cheeks.
"Lily?" The woman with rosy cheeks cautiously asked her. She looks familiar "It's me, Hestia, Hestia Jones. You do remember me, right?" Lily was barely listening. Hestia kneeled in front of her and covered her hands. "Lily, you're scaring me. Please say something"
"Please go away" Lily replied in a monotone.
"No. We're going to talk. We need to talk" Hestia's eyes suddenly twinkled with tears. She shook her lightly. "You need to let it out. I know this is all hard for you but you have to be strong."
Lily just shook her head in response.
The other woman snorted. "Oh for heaven's sake. Stop with this drama already. Let her be, Hest, maybe she'll decide to walk off the cliff and jump. It'll save us the trouble of explaining to her"
"Alice, please bear with me, will you?" Hestia pleaded.
Lily stopped when she heard the name. Alice? She's here? When Lily looked up, it took her time before she realized that the short-haired woman was none other than Alice Longbottom. The woman looked very different from what Lily remembered of her best friend. Alice still has her round face, but her look surly and her expression fiercer. Much different from the kind and friendly expression of the Alice she knew.
"Alice!" Lily exclaimed, standing up and flinging herself towards her best friend. "Oh I'm so happy to see you! Thank Merlin you're here! I… I really need you right now. Alice, I don't know what to do anymore"
Lily was close to tears now but Alice just stared strangely at her. She slowly took Lily's arms away from her in disgust. "Hah! Okay first, don't ever hug me that way again"
"Excuse me?" Lily blinked.
"Let me make this clear to you. We do not hug each other. We do not even touch each other. I don't even know why that old man gave me this task" Alice turned to Hestia. "I shouldn't even be here. I've got three Death Eater hot spots to monitor. This is a waste of my time"
"But Alice," Lily looked confused. "You… You're my best friend"
Alice just laughed. "Oh no, no, no Lily. I am not your best friend, not anymore. Let's not go down memory lane now, shall we?"
"What happened to you?" Lily asked irritably.
Alice's shrill laugh sent shivers down Lily's spine. "You're funny. You honestly want me to tell you what happened to me? Hahaha!"
"I think this is not the time and place to be talking about this—" Hestia interjected standing in between Alice and Lily.
"No, Lily brought it up. Let's do talk about it" Alice smirked.
"Alice…" Hestia warned
"I mean, Dumbledore did say to fill her up. So I'm filling her up!"
Lily looked puzzled.
"You know what happened to me? Hm.. where shall I start, Lily? Oh I know!" Alice exclaimed with mock excitement. "How about the time Frank and I were captured and tortured by Death Eaters after Voldemort's downfall? Yeah, tortured us for information about the Dark Lord's disappearance. Lestrange and Crouch Jr. brutally tortured us until we lose our mind and left us for dead. We survived barely but they left us 'mentally incapable' as said by those good for nothing healers. My husband and I became insane. I became insane, Lily!" Alice laughed hysterically, memory flashing in an instant. "They dubbed us as the crazy couple, would you believe that? Unluckily for me, I recovered after a year of shit and now I have to raise my family alone while I watch my husband in St. Mungo's making wallpaper out of Drooble's Best Blowing Gum wrappers!" Alice heaved heavily, leaving a shocked Lily teary eyed.
Lily was speechless. She was debating if this was all a joke, but decided it isn't so by the way Alice eyes glitter, tears trying to escape. "I… I'm sorry…"
"Your sorry wouldn't change a thing" Alice spat. She tried to composed herself. "You don't know how hard it was. So don't act like you're in the worst situation in the world right now, Lily because frankly, I'll lose my memory any day" Alice said as she stormed outside.
"Here," Hestia pushed the cup towards Lily as they sat in the kitchen counter. "Alice isn't usually one to burst out like that. She just has a lot in her mind right now. Please understand"
Lily shook her head, not really listening to Hestia. She couldn't believe what she just heard. What happened to Alice and Frank was terrible but why was Alice taking it on her? Did something happen between them? "I don't get it"
"You grew apart, Lily" Hestia said as if answering Lily's question. "After Alice recovered from her… uhm… let's just say she was never the same way again. No one can really blame her. What happened to them was awful and you could imagine how she feels, Frank being…" Hestia bowed her head and drank her cup, unable to say the word.
"Is she blaming me for what happened to them?" Lily's realization came as a shock. "I've got to talk to Alice. I need to explain myself to her"
"Are you insane?" Hestia snapped so suddenly. "No, you are in no position to explain anything to her. You're just going to make it worst, Lily. Besides, the topic's a taboo. No one talks about it, especially to Alice."
"No wonder she's like that" Lily groaned, Alice's angry face flashed before her eyes. "I need to talk to her"
"You shouldn't worry about her. Alice didn't become the most notorious Auror for nothing" Hestia covered Lily's hand with her. "It will be okay, Lily, I promise. Soon, The Order will meet you to discuss things and by then everything will fall into place"
"And you all expect me to sit here and wait?" Lily laughed. "Oh no. I'm not taking any answers from you or anyone from Dumbledore's circle. No way" Lily declared.
Hestia sighed. "I know you have trust issues with Dumbledore but this can't go on, Lily. The Order is really trying it's best to help you"
"Well help me by telling me everything!" She looked troubled, just like how James looked this morning. "It's hard to explain. Not with—"
"I'm hereeeee!" Came a cheery voice.
Both women looked around and saw a blonde woman came out of the fireplace. She was wearing a rather formal attire as if she just came from the office while her hair was tied up in a low bun. She smiled at them. "Am I interrupting something, hmm?"
"Emmeline Vance?" Lily mumbled.
Emmeline's smile widens. "Ooh. You remember me? Well I'm flattered. We we're never really close back in old Order days, Lily. I'm a bit surprised."
Lily just gaped at her. "We're in a middle of quite an important confrontation here. You mind?"
Emmeline coughed and looked expectedly at Hestia who responded, "Lily, Emmeline Vance is also a member of The Order"
"Why is she here then?" Lily understood. "No. I told her I won't take any answers from any of you. Why won't you listen?"
"Lily, Lily..." Emmeline shook her head as she took a seat. Her cheery smiles seem to hide something more and it disturbed Lily. Emmeline looked sternly at her. "Who do you expect to answer your questions? A crystal ball? You're stubbornness won't get you anywhere. You're not a telepath like Miss Jones here you know"
"Wait you're a telepath?" Lily whipped to Hestia. "You've been reading my thoughts all along?"
"No! No! Not like that. More like a Legilimen in training… well a different kind of Legilimen. You see I can detect people's—"
"I'm sorry" Emmeline interrupted with a hand. "But I didn't cancel my very important meeting for this. Let's get down to business shall we, Miss Lily?"
"Ministry Official" Hestia mouthed to Lily from behind Emmeline.
Lily looked at Emmeline cautiously before sitting down. "Fine. I want to know what the hell is going on! What happened to James and me? And why was my family attacked?"
Emmeline smiled and answered flatly. "No. I'm not going to answer that. In fact, it's not going to work that way"
"What?"
"Oh brother," Hestia shook her head.
"I'm not going to answer those questions. You will learn them soon. Things will be revealed to you slowly. Everything has a right time. No, I came here to tell you what happened the night Voldemort tried to kill your son ten years ago" Emmeline looked her in the eye. "And you are going to listen"