Loki woke, almost jumping out of his skin when he felt a hand touching his arm. He laid still for a moment with his eyes pressed firmly shut, waiting to see what the hand would do, but when it did not move, Loki slowly peeked through his lashes at the assailant. As soon as he did, he opened his eyes wide with shock and inhaled sharply. Thor. Thor was here.
Loki's gasp caused Thor to shift slightly and he rolled over, taking his hand with him. Feeling the loss of the contact, Loki pulled his arm to his chest and allowed himself to stare at his brother's sleeping back. His brother was here in… Loki looked around finally realizing that this wasn't his room. Where the hell was he?
In a slight panic, Loki sat straight up, careful not to jostle Thor awake and scanned any surface for his notebook. Ah! There is was. It was sitting in plain sight on the bedside table with the notebook already open to a single sentence.
Thor saved me.
As soon as Loki read it, a tornado of emotions overtook him, pounding in his chest. He remembered instantly what happened with Thor and Tony and what he had confessed to them last night. The weight of the realization pressed down on him and he was suddenly heavy with fear and despair. What if Thor and Tony, the two Loki cared about more than anything, found out what Loki had done in the years passed? The thought had Loki reeling with shame.
Taking one last glance at Thor, Loki slid off the bed, landing barefooted into the soft, plush carpet. Loki wiggled his toes against the softness and started tiptoeing across the room to the door. Thor had always been a heavy sleeper but Loki wanted to be safe. He didn't like it when his brother was in a grumpy mood; he was much too stupid in that state.
Loki slipped out the door and down the hallway, heading for the kitchen. Perhaps Stark would have some coffee ready and Loki sincerely hoped he would because right now, Loki could kill for a cup. In the living room, Loki headed for the kitchen that was just a few steps away, but he faltered in his steps as he caught sight of Tony still sleeping on the kitchen.
Just one look had Loki's heart thumping painfully. Tony was sprawled across the couch with one leg up over the back of the couch and his left arm dangling off the edge of the cushions, all while his blanket was scrunched up and pooled around his waist. And, like usual, Tony's mouth was hanging open disgustingly and he breathed heavily in an annoying rasping sound. Loki couldn't help it, he had to smile at Tony's ridiculous display. It was absolutely endearing.
Taking slow, measured steps, Loki headed towards Tony's couch and stooped down so that he was eye level with Stark's sleeping form. Loki could smell Tony. He smelled like grease and coffee and also… a little bit of body odor. Smiling to himself, Loki crinkled his nose, trying not to laugh at his internal thoughts.
For a moment more, he allowed himself to watch Tony sleep. Tony looked so vulnerable, so breathtakingly still when he was asleep. When awake, Tony constantly buzzed with energy but here, he was peaceful and… Loki's thoughts broke away when Tony swallowed, breathed in softly and shifted just enough to pull his arm back up by his head.
After a moment, Tony went back to his obnoxious breathing and Loki tucked his knees to his chest as he watched. Then, Loki decided to do something bold. He took one finger and reached over to brush Tony's hair from his face. Loki snatched his fingers away, expecting Tony to wake, but when he didn't, Loki sighed in relief.
He then decided to try again, so he reached across his face to skim his fingers along the line of Tony's jaw, relishing in the feeling of Tony's skin beneath his tingling fingertips. Suddenly the sound of movement shocked Loki into removing his hand and standing up to face the person. Loki turned and instantly recognized who stood before him. This was Rhodey, Tony's best friend from boarding school. Loki had seen the two in the paper.
Rhodey was smiling at him, his eyes flicking from him to Tony and back again. Loki didn't like the way he was smiling at him; it was as if he were insinuating something inappropriate about he and Tony.
After a beat, Rhodey gestured for Loki to follow and he disappeared down the hallway. Loki glared after him but followed nonetheless, curious about what Tony's best friend would have to say about what he had just seen.
They entered his room and Loki stared around. It looked identical to the room that Tony had across the hall. "So, you're the famous Loki," Rhodes said as he closed his bedroom door behind him.
Loki flopped down on Rhodey's bed and glanced back at Tony's roommate. "And you are the famous Rhodey."
"Oh, you know who I am already? Did Tony tell you about me? I bet he said some shitty things about me."
Loki shook his head. "I saw you in the papers with Stark," Loki said. Realizing that he had practically admitted to stalking Tony in the papers, Loki amended, "We get the New York Times at work." That was only because Loki had asked his manager to do so, but he wasn't telling Rhodey that.
"Uh huh," Rhodey nodded, not at all sounding convinced. "Well that really sucks that Tony didn't talk about me. All he ever did was talk about you."
Loki's eyes widened. "He did?"
"Yeah," Rhodey said, looking at Loki oddly. "He used to say stuff like 'Loki would like this game' or 'Loki would hates this movie' and other stuff like that. Everything related back to you. He never shut up. And even though he tried to stop talking about you these last few months and hid his feelings, we all knew. He's never gotten over you. He never will."
His heart flew a million miles a minute and Loki felt as if he had fallen off a cliff. Tony had thought about him, talked about him that much? Loki thought he'd forgotten about him. "But what about the girls? The ones I saw in the news?" he asked weakly. Loki knew he had no right to ask, to pry into Tony's private life, but Loki couldn't help but feel a little wary of those girls. What did they mean?
Rhodey barked out a laugh, surprising Loki with a jolt. "You cannot be serious, Loks. Those girls were meaningless. If you haven't noticed, Tony is crazy about you and you are obviously crazy about him. Why would you even fight that? Why would you even let Tony go?"
"Did you just call me Loks?" Loki asked, narrowing his eyes.
"Yes, I did."
"Don't. Only Tony gets to call me that," Loki said haughtily.
Rhodey laughed again, this time with a light-hearted tone. "Tony was right, you are a feisty little thing."
"He called me little?"
Rhodey continued to laugh. "Yeah, what does he call you? Little Loks?"
Loki's mouth dropped open. "He's been going around talking about me by calling me 'Little Loks'? Is he mad?"
Rhodey shook his head. "I can see why Tony likes you."
A red tint splashed across Loki's face and he looked down at his hands. "Thanks… I guess."
"Look," Rhodey said, sitting down on the bed and swinging on his legs so that he was lounging amongst the pillows at the top of the bed. "Here's the real reason why I pulled into my room to talk. I honestly think that you should just let yourself be with Tony. You obvious like him a lot, so why not just let it happen?" Loki opened his mouth to protest but Rhodey continued before Loki could get a word in. "I know you've got some crap going on, Tony's told me all about that, what happened in high school and how you have mysterious problems that you won't tell anyone about… But are those really stop you from being with Tony? Or are you just lying to yourself?"
"Lying to myself?" Loki repeated angrily. "If certain people found out that Tony and I were together, that I was even near the people of my past, the consequences would be ugly and I don't know if I'm prepared to risk it."
"But what if those certain people don't find out? What if the two of you take slow and stay under the radar? Don't you think if you were really careful, things could work out for you and Tony?"
"They may work out for the time being, Rhodes, but that is only in the short term. What about the long term? What would we do then?"
Rhodey smiled triumphantly. "So there is a long term with Tony?"
Loki glared, realizing the trap Rhodey had just led him into.
"Just think about it, okay? Things will be clear if you just think about it."
Loki didn't say anything but he did follow Rhodey as he led the way out of his room and into the hallway. It appeared that Tony and Thor were still sleeping, but Rhodey let him use the main bathroom for showering since Loki had class at nine. As Loki stood in the hot spray, letting the water drip down his black bangs, he thought about Rhodey's words. Would there ever be a time when it would be safe to be with Tony?
Loki was just about to leave when Tony appeared right in front of him and slammed the door shut. "Wait for me, I just need to grab my stuff."
"It's not my fault that you overslept, Stark," Loki shot back, trying to reach around him for the doorknob.
"You should have woken me up!" Tony cried.
"Move or we'll both be late. All of my books are back at my apartment and I need to go and retrieve them now if I want to make it in time." Loki tugged at the door but Tony just pushed it back.
"Wait for me, Loks," Tony pleaded.
"No."
"What is all of this fuss about?" Thor asked as he entered the living room, rubbing at his eyes with a yawn.
"We need to get to class, but Loki won't wait for me!" Tony whined.
"Classes?" Thor asked, looking a little too interest. "Can I tag along with you guys to your campus?"
Loki turned his glare onto his brother. "Don't you have your own classes to attend? Surely you must be going since it takes a couple hours to drive to New York."
"Nope," Thor said, shaking his head. "I informed my instructors that I would be out of town this week, so my homework for the time being is already finished. I am free to tag along with the two of you as I please."
Loki groaned but Tony gestured for Thor to come closer. "Hold the door so Loki will not escape and I'll grab my stuff."
Thor immediately switched places with Tony. Loki let go of the doorknob, giving up on leaving without them and leaned back against the wall just in time to watch Tony disappear into the hallway. Thor immediately nudged him with his elbow. "Ow! What was that for?" Loki said, casting a frown in his brother's direction.
"So, brother, what do you think of giving Stark another shot?" Thor asked seriously, despite the twinkle in his eyes.
"Why is everyone asking me that this morning?" Loki murmured to himself. He crossed his arms and decidedly did not answer Thor. Thor just smiled and let Loki be.
Loki glanced at his brother and felt another wave of fondness for his brother. Their relationship had returned almost to what it had been just before he ran away, if not better. And with Stark… well, he didn't know much where things were heading, but it looked like, no matter how much Loki fought it, their relationship was heading back into a romantic one. Loki couldn't even think about what that could mean.
Lost in his thoughts, he jumped in surprise when he realized that Tony had just appeared in front of him. "Ready to go?" Tony asked with a smile.
Loki was mesmerized by Tony's smile and was ultimately too shocked to even move. Blinking a few times, Loki finally looked away and glanced at Thor who was grinning and generally looking too pleased by the reddening of Loki's face.
"Did I miss something here?" Tony asked, still with that blasted smile.
Loki avoided Tony's gaze while Thor said, "It will become clear in time, my friend."
Tony frowned in confusion but shrugged. "Okay, Thor, whatever you say."
"Come on," Loki said, shoving Thor out of the way and opening the door, "If we keep delaying, I'll never make it to class.
Thor was the first to exit the apartment and Tony brushed past him, saying, "Don't worry, Shakespeare, we'll take my car."
"What did you just call me?" Loki asked in horror, following him out and closing the door behind him. They didn't lock the door since Rhodey would be leaving for a class in an hour.
Tony laughed but just kept following Thor. "You heard me, Loks."
"Don't call me that," Loki said, catching up to him. "One nickname is enough, thank you."
"You mean that you like when I call you 'Loks'?"
"Well it's certainly better than Shakespeare," Loki mumbled, trying not to look at Stark.
Tony laughed and mussed Loki's hair. "Whatever you say, Loks," he said before turning back down the hallway. Loki looked down as he walked, fuming silently.
Fine, he liked the nickname Tony had originally given him and yes, he didn't want Tony to change it, but that didn't mean that Tony should get any ideas. Loki looked up at the back of Tony's head and sighed internally. Why was he even fooling himself? He liked Stark and that wasn't going to change. Why not just… let himself be happy?
I'm sorry that this update took longer. I've actually had a life recently, which is dangerous because start neglecting things like this. I should be back on track though now.