Sleepwalking Past Hope

Chapter 7: Death

I unlit the light to embrace the dark,
To be near but not to turn into you my darling.

-HIM

"Go and see Sakura, you're the one that understands exactly what she's going through." Sasuke heard Kakashi say and it was the only motivation he needed to go see her. It felt wrong to leave her alone in a moment like this, especially as he knew that she would have done the same for him.

Kakashi gave him directions to Sakura's house and he quickly left knowing she'd be in her home. After all, he once did the same.

It had been harder than he expected to go to her home, he was unsure if he should be there. They hadn't been on good terms since he came back, they barely talked, barely looked at each other. Yet he was the only one who understood her pain, although he had felt it years ago.

What would he do once he saw her? Apologize? Comfort her? Nothing sounded like him and would she even want him there, he doubted it.

All those thoughts kept him from going to her. Sasuke wasn't a person to doubt yet here he was, doubting his every thought, his every move. He hadn't known how to react when she told them that her parents died, and he still didn't quite know how either. He didn't know what to say or even if he should say anything. Not knowing, it was something new to Sasuke Uchiha and he wasn't sure how to handle it.

Naruto would have been better for this kind of thing, he would know what to do to make her feel better. He would know the things to say to make her smile, to make her forget even if it was for a moment the pain, her loss. He would make her go out and watch him eat ramen, he'd even make her eat some. He would talk so much she would eventually forget why she even frowned in the first place.

Even Kakashi would be a better candidate. He would know exactly the things to say, he's lived long enough to know loss like the palm of his hand. He would tell her how out of the three she was always the stronger one emotionally. He would make her smile with his memories of Team 7. He would tell her how much her parents loved her and how proud they were of her. He'd make her understand that they wouldn't want her to dwell on their death, that it was always better to move on, he could even use Sasuke as an example.

Yet, Sasuke was the one who had to do it and although he understood… he'd done the worst mistakes. He would tell her nothing and if he did it would be things that would surely make her feel worse. He would call her annoying, weak, and useless. She would feel uncomfortable around him, uneasy. She wouldn't smile and she wouldn't forget…she would just remember and cry.

He didn't know what Kakashi was thinking when he told him to go see Sakura. Kakashi was supposed to be the smarter one and yet he sent the one who had always hurt her. Sasuke could only wonder why. Kakashi knew what happened to his parents, hell everyone knew… but if he couldn't even cope with his own pain how was he supposed to help Sakura overcome hers.

Sasuke remembered how she was always there for him even if he wouldn't accept it, he always pushed her away when all she wanted to do was help. But she always understood him more than he gave her credit for. The night he had decided to leave… somehow she had anticipated it. She was there waiting for him, she already knew he would leave and as he saw her that night he could see it was already hurting her. He sometimes couldn't help but wonder if she had known he would leave even before he knew himself.

"Why won't you say anything to me?"

She used to ask accusingly, he always pushed her out, he always ignored her. He would make her think she wasn't worth his time.

"You won't say a single word to me…"

She had frowned and she could hear the pain in her voice, but shrugged it away. What did she know of pain?

He remembered how the tears fell from her eyes and he tried to pretend like he didn't care, he always kept her at bay. He told her.

"I don't need your help."

When in reality he did, he just wouldn't admit it.

"Do you want to be truly alone?"

She had asked him and at that moment he thought he had always been alone, but once he left the village he knew he hadn't… Sakura, Naruto, and Kakashi had always been there. After that he had learned what being alone truly was.

"I love you with all my heart!"

In the end he had turned away from that love and from the chance at a happy life. He knew that if he'd stayed he could have had anything and everything.

"We'd be happy, I swear!"

And he didn't doubt it , not even once, they could have been happy if it wasn't for his mistakes, for his revenge. In the end it always came back to him and to his wrongs.

"Annoying."

He would always tell her and she really was… So, so damn annoying even after all those years.

He wanted to comfort her, but yet here he was lost in his thoughts as he walked around the village.

"I'm worried about Sakura-chan…" Naruto whispered to the woman in his arms holding her close to him. They were in Team's 8 training grounds looking at everything around them laying against a tree. Naruto had picked her up in the Hyuga compound and dragged her away needing to get away before he ran toward Sakura trying to make her feel better. No matter how much he wished he could help her…he couldn't.

"I know Naruto-kun, shouldn't you be there comforting her…?" Hinata smiled sadly. Looking up at Naruto's blue eyes.

"I would if understood what she was going through, but I don't." Naruto told her kissing her forehead a frown adorning his face.

"What do you mean? You lost your parents too; you know what she's going through. You should be there for her." Hinata complained shaking her head slightly.

"I only know half of it. I never really met my parents, I didn't grow up with them. Of course I miss 'em, but it's not the same." He reasoned sighing in defeat.

"I guess you're right… She's been with them all her life and then suddenly they're murdered. She wasn't able to do anything. I can't believe Kabuto would resort to something like that." Hinata's eyes were filled with tears for her friend, she worried for Sakura and she imagined how the news had destroyed her. But Naruto was right there was nothng either of them could do for her.

In reality they could only imagine, because neither of them had gone through it.

"It's the only reason I'm not there comforting her, you know… I tried the same with Sasuke back then and he pointed it out, I didn't understand his pain, and I realized it was true." Naruto held Hinata close and kissed her cheek. He didn't want to be alone, Mebuki and Kizashi had been nice people. They've always loved Naruto like another son and he felt the pain of their loss too. Never as Sakura should be feeling it, but it was there.

"Sasuke's parents were murdered too, right?" Hinata asked Naruto.

"Yeah, by his brother and then he left seeking revenge… after finally achieving his revenge it turned out he was ordered to by the elders of the leaf. His whole family had been taken away from him by his own home." Naruto remembered how Sasuke used to be fixated with revenge back then and in the end it brought him nothing.

"Maybe he's the only one who can understand what she's going through…" Hinata mused out loud.

"He is the only one who will fully understand and the one that can comfort her…" Naruto nodded smiling sadly.

"Do you think he will?" Hinata questioned to both Naruto and herself.

"I don't know but I hope he goes to her, she needs him more than ever." Naruto sighed, silently pleading for Sasuke to get the stick off from up his ass and to realize what the girl means to him.

Sasuke could notice the people around him walking, smiling, laughing, and minding their own business and he wondered how some people could be so happy and carefree while others went through pain. He remembered thinking the same thing back then after his parents death. People looked at him with pity, but they went on with their lives as if their deaths hadn't affected them at all. Later as he grew he understood you could only feel pain for those you care about.

He mourned his parents death because he loved them. He loved his mother with her smiling face and kind eyes, he loved his father even though he looked down at him at times, and he cared about him. He missed everyone he was close to in his clan, because after they were all dead he was left alone.

He hated the villagers for not caring about his clan's death, he hated them for not caring about Sakura's parents death. But would Sasuke care about the villagers death? No, probably not, he felt nothing for these people. Would Sakura care? Yes, she would, this was her home; it had always been and always would be.

Death mattered depending on the perspective.

Orochimaru had once been a leaf shinobi and he died by Sasuke's hand. Did someone care? Probably his old team mates Jiraiya and Tsunade, but the rest of the village was probably glad. When Jiraiya died he imagined the Hokage and Naruto mourned him.

When Sakura thought he had died in the fight with Haku back in the land of the waves she had cried for him and when he opened his eyes he saw happiness wash through her in relief. It was because she cared.

If it had been the other way around would he have cared?

He thought so, he remembered in the chunin exams waking up to a hurt Sakura in front of him, it was an image he hadn't been able to forget. He also remembered the overwhelming desire to hurt the ninja who had done that to her and so he did.

When Sasuke left the village back then he knew both Sakura and Naruto cried for him, and while some others did care there were those who didn't. Who couldn't have cared less that the sole Uchiha survivor had left the village in search of power.

You couldn't feel pain for someone you've never cared for and Sasuke right now felt Sakura's pain… Did that mean he cared for her?

"Why was I called here Lady Tsunade?" Kakashi asked as he closed the door to her office. He could see Tsunade in her desk drinking sake like there was no tomorrow.

"Tell me you sent Naruto to comfort Sakura or tell me you did it… I would want to be there for her, but I can't. It all reminds me of Dan, Jiraiya, and even of Orochimaru." She smiled sadly at the copy nin standing by the door as she took another sip of her sake.

"I didn't go to comfort her nor did I send Naruto." He informed the Hokage as he watched her stare at him in confusion.

"Why? She needs someone there!" Tsunade shouted as she stood from her desk and punched it out of anger leaving a dent in the desk.

"I did send someone. I sent the one she needs there and the one that will understand her better than any of us." Kakashi smiled sadly under his mask hoping it hadn't been a mistake.

"Who?" Tsunade asked him though she already knew who it was and she wasn't sure if she agreed with Kakashi's choice of comfort.

"Sasuke Uchiha." Kakashi answered her and Tsunade sighed. He had sent the one who had always hurt her in the past to try and comfort her. She silently prayed it would work.

In the end of his walk Sasuke found himself in front of Sakura's house and before he could think it twice he walked to the door. He had already been there once and she had closed the door in his face not accepting his apology, why would this time be any different?

He knocked on the door but received no reply from her and when so he tried opening it. She had left the door unlocked, not bothering to close it. He entered the house closing the door behind him. She hadn't turned on any lights but he could see she had made a mess in the room. There were things thrown all over the house.

"Sakura." He called looking for her and he found her sitting on the floor looking at a picture frame in her hands. It was a heart breaking scene.

A/N:

Well thanks to the 23 people who reviewed in the previous chapter. I know this chapter is way past late and I'm sorry as always. On a side note, I do hope all of you have enjoyed Christmas and well happy New Year to you all. This is my first update of the year and I do hope you've enjoyed it. :)

I hope Sasuke's character was alright in this chapter and I'm sorry for the chapter being short. Tell me what you thought of the chapter and how the story's going. and of course, if you haven't already check out my other stories.

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