Here it is people, episode 4 is on the air! And just to let you know, there quite a few sexual references and innuendo that you might find obscene. Anyway, enjoy and review!
Episode #4: Lesson Number Ed
Ed, Eddy, Kevin, Rolf, Jonny, Paul and a few other boys enter their locker room in their football uniforms, having just finished football practice. As they change back into their normal clothes...
"WHOO, I can already see victory, guys!" Ed exclaims.
"I know we're gonna win cuz Plank said so! He's psychic when it comes to seein games' outcomes!" Jonny says.
"Oh yeah, baby! Lime Bay's SO gonna kiss our asses next week!" Eddy exclaims.
"Indeed, Eddy dawg!" Rolf agrees. "Those little Lime Bay lambs shall fall before the might of ROLF'S ANGRY SKILLS!!"
".... Rolf, it's 'madd skills.'" Kevin corrects Rolf, whom Eddy laughs at.
"Yo Paul, you heard Rolf?!" Eddy asks, still chuckling. "............. Paul?....."
"Paul, where you at?" Kevin calls out, then they hear Paul's giggling from the other side of the room. Eddy and Kevin check it out, and see Paul peeping into the girls' locker room via a tiny hole in the wall!
"Come on, Nazzalicious! Take it off!" Paul whispers, waiting for Nazz to take off her cheerleading outfit.
"Dude, you peepin on the girls?!" Eddy asks with pervy glee.
"Hush, I'm watchin a strip show!" Paul answers. Kevin shoves Paul aside to see the girls changing. In the girls' room are Nazz, Jenna, the Kankers, and a few other girls who aren't fully seen due to the hole's tiny size.
"Lemme see!" Eddy shoves Kevin aside to peep: "Hehehehe!"
Kevin flips Eddy away: "Is Jenn naked!?"
"Yo I was here 1st, guys!" Paul grabs Eddy and Kevin, then they loudly squabble for the peephole. The girls hear this...
"I WIN!!" Paul beats out Kevin & Eddy and peeps into the hole, but sees a girl's eye on the other side! It's Lee's eye!!
"CREEP ALERT, GIRLS!!" Lee alerts the other girls, and Paul screams "RUN!"
He, Eddy and Kevin run out into the hallways with the angry girls chasing them. Eddy splits from his fellow perverts and manages to outrun the girls, but while he isn't looking he crashes into Double-D. This causes them to drop their stuff, creating a mess.
"Eddy, do you mind watching where you're going?" Double-D asks as he recollects his papers, and Eddy gets up with Double-D's agenda shoved into his face. He pulls it out, and sees a page that catches his eye:
"Hey Sockhead, since when do you tutor people?" Eddy asks.
"I've been tutoring for some time now, Eddy." Double-D answers, taking his agenda back. "I volunteer to help others overcome their academic difficulties, and it earns me extra credit. Maybe if you and the other guys pay attention in class, maybe you can do the same and brighten your chances of continuing on towards a premium college education that could land you that ideal life of luxury & fortune you oh so desire! What do you think?!"
"... How about we help others with their classwork for CASH! FAST CASH!" Eddy suggests.
"I should've known better." Double-D says to himself. "Anyway Eddy, could you do me a favor: tell the Sex Ed. teacher I'll probably miss class today because the principal is giving me my next tutoring assignment personally."
Sex Ed. class is attended by Ed, Double-D (absent as aforementioned), Eddy, the Kankers, Kevin, Rolf, Jonny, Paul, Nazz and Jenna. They're watching a video detailing reproduction, and all the boys except Rolf are wide-eyed. Then Eddy, Kevin and Paul start giggling as the video progresses.
"Guys, look at that! It's a vagina!" Eddy giggles with Kevin and Paul. Lee can't believe what Eddy just said!
"He did not just..." she utters in disbelief.
"Oh shit, you guys feelin horny cuz I am!" Paul giggles. "I'm feelin real horny, man!"
The girls are starting to become annoyed. Then Kevin goes: "The way Jenn was lookin at the male diagram, I can tell who she was thinkin of! Hehehe!"
"Ugh, go jump off a bridge." Jenna scoffs at Kevin.
"Cut it out." May demands.
"Yeah, you 3 are makin us sick." Nazz says.
"Sick, eh?" Eddy asks. "Hey Dr. Paul, you got any medications for the girls' sickness?! Hehehehehe!"
"Let's see!..." Paul checks, suddenly wearing a doctor uniform... "Ah, here we go, girls! Take a dose of..." he labels a blank capsule and holds it up: "MYCOXAFLOPPIN!"
"EWWWWW!!" the girls recoil in disgust.
"Good one, Paul!" Eddy laughs.
"Hold up, I got another one!..." Paul gets up in his normal clothes again, doing a dance involving lots of pelvic-thrusting crotch-grabbing: "Yo, ladies! Want me to insert my key into yo locks?!"
"Slither my snake into your gardens?!" Kevin asks, angering the girls.
"Put my hotdog into your buns?!" Eddy asks, further agitating the girls.
"How bout I..." Paul jumps atop his desk... "FLY MY BUMBLEBEE INTO YO FLOWERS?!!"
Eddy & Kevin laugh! But then Jenna gets up and grabs Paul & Kevin by their necks: "I'm gonna STING ya'll like a bumblebee!"
"HAHAHA, THAT'S-" Eddy is grabbed by Lee (yes, even Lee's turned off by Eddy's perversion), and she & Jenna tie Eddy, Kevin & Paul together into a tight knot!
"Assholes." Jenna grumbles as she and Lee return to their desks.
"Serves you guys right." Jonny says, Ed bobbing his head in agreement.
"Yes, why can't you act more maturely like AP-level Ed boy?" Rolf asks.
"Speaking of that, where IS Double-D?" Marie asks.
Then an announcement comes on: "Marie Kanker, to the principal's office. Marie Kanker, to the principal's office."
"What does he want now?" Marie heads towards the principal's office.
"Hey, McMoney and CK!" Paul utters to Eddy and Kevin. "Who's up for that game after class?!"
Principal Antonucci welcomes Marie into his office, where Double-D sits in one of 2 chairs. He's plump, has gray hair and a moustache, a beige suit over a white shirt and brown tie, and brown shoes.
"Hello, Marie! Take a seat!" Antonuuci greets. "Have you been staying out of trouble?"
"Yeah." Marie answers as she takes the 2nd seat, making a quick dreamy glance at Double-D who tries maintaining his composure. Then she looks back at Antonucci: "So what is it?"
"Your mother talked with me this morning, and she's concerned about your grades." Antonucci explains.
"What's wrong with Cs and Ds?" Marie asks. "I even got a B in Literature."
"A single B won't cut it." Antonucci says. "Your mom and I know you can improve your performance in your other classes- with a little tutoring, of course! So I'm assigning you the best tutor we could find: good ol' Eddward right here!"
"Ah, yes! I can... help you work towards a better future!" Double-D says.
"Thanks so much, Principal!!" Marie gleefully thanks, shaking Antonucci's hand. "I really appreciate it!!"
"Glad you do!" Antonucci replies, then the bell rings. Then the 3 hear Eddy, Kevin and Paul from down the hallway...
"BONER!..." Eddy shouts out.
"BONER!!..." Kevin shouts louder.
"BONER!!!..." Paul shouts even louder. Double-D is shocked, while Marie and Antonucci are disgusted.
"Excuse me a moment..." Antonucci heads out to find Eddy, Kevin & Paul. "HEY!!..."
Marie takes a moment to forget the perverts, then looks at Double-D: "Hey, Double-D. I need to tell ya somethin." she moves her chair closer to Double-D.
"Wh-what is it?" Double-D asks, sweating a bit.
"You see..." Marie begins. "I'm kinda busy after school today, so I can't stay after classes. But here's what we can do: how about you come over to my place at 4 o'clock this evening and help me out there?!"
"I will... if it isn't another trap." Double-D complies.
"Don't worry, I'm being totally honest this time!" Marie says with a wink.
Later, Double-D paces around his room. He takes something out of his drawer and looks at it, but it's too shady to be seen clearly. He puts the object back into his drawer, prepares some pencils and notepads to help tutor Marie with, wipes the sweat off his face, takes a deep breath...
"Now's the time..." he heads outside...
At the street corner, Ed sees Double-D going by with his tutoring kit.
"Hi, Double-D!" Ed greets.
"...Hello! Bye!" Double-D quickly replies before speeding up and taking a turn into the lane. Ed sees him rush down the lane and turn again, into the woods.
"Double-D, where you goin?" Ed asks, but Double-D's already disappeared into the woods, so Eds follows the pathway through the woods. Eventually, he sees Double-D reach a fork in the path with a sign that points towards different destinations...
... And Ed is horrified when Double-D takes the path towards the trailer park... "Oh, no..."
Ed rushes to reach Double-D and stop him. But by the time he reaches the trailer park, Ed sees Double-D already knocking on the Kankers' door. Ed hides behind another trailer as the Kankers' door opens...
"COME ON IN, MARIE'S WAITING!" Lee & May grab Double-D, pull him inside, and close the door. Ed sees this and panics:
"Oh, God! Oh, GOD! OH GOD, OH GOD, OH GOD!!" Ed runs back through the woods to get help.
Eddy, Kevin & Paul are reading porn magazines as they sit on the front porch of Paul's house. Paul's house is very big, has 4 floors and 8 apartments that accomodate his entire family!
"Oh, yes! Check this one out, boys!" Eddy shows a picture of a girl to Kevin and Paul, who giggle pervertedly.
"Well take a look at this!" Kevin shows a picture that makes Eddy and Paul giggle.
"Man, Paul! Where'd ya get all these magazines?!" Eddy asks. "I gotta know!"
"I been collectin em since I was 8!" Paul answers. "That's right, I got a whole lot more! Lemme go get em!"
Just as Paul gets up, the 3 hear Ed panicking down the lane and around the park: "EDDY, EDDY!!"
Eddy, Kevin and Paul rush towards the frantic Ed, who tries explaining the situation:
"GUYS, DOUBLE-D!! DOUBLE-D'S IN THEIR CLUTCHES!!" Ed shouts in extremely fast spazzing. "SMOOCHING, GERMS, COOTIES, OR EVEN RAPE!! IT'S HORRIBLE!! HELP, GUYS!! DOUBLE-D'S IN HELL!!! HELP, HELP, I'M SPIRALING!!! I'M SPIRALING!!! I'M-"
"GET A HOLD OF YOURSELF!!" Eddy knocks some sense into Ed by spinning his head with a hard smack!
"Thanks, I needed that!" Ed thanks.
"Now start over calmly, Ed." Kevin says. "What's up with Double-D?"
"Ok, here it goes..." Ed begins: "I saw Double-D go to the trailer park and knock on the Kankers' door for, uh... um... God knows why. And then they snatched him and pulled him inside. Who knows what they're doing to him right now, and I don't wanna think the worst when Marie comes onto him."
"Geez, this can't be happenin." Eddy says, pacing around. "For the millionth freakin time!"
"I don't see nothin wrong with that." Paul says. "And who knows, DD's probably gettin some right now if ya know what I mean!"
"..... What?....." Kevin looks at Paul in disbelief.
"Paul, these are KANKERS we're talkin about, especially Marie in this case!" Eddy tells Paul. "How can you even say that?"
"What, they're just real flirty girls." Paul says. "You guys are exaggeratin this whole 'Grungy Blue rapin DD' thing! I think she's ok! And sure, I'd tap her and her sistas' asses any day!"
"..... Somethin's wrong with you, man." Kevin tells Paul.
"Maybe so, but if ya'll gonna go save DD, count me in cuz I wanna... ehe, do some research!" Paul says pervertedly.
"Ok then, boys! Let's get to it!" Eddy says, then delivers Hannibal's famous quote: "I love it when a plan comes together!"
Minutes later, the 4 jump out of Eddy's house dressed like the A-Team with Eddy as Hannibal, Ed as Face, Kevin as Murdock, and Paul as Baracus.
"TO THE TRAILER PARK!" Eddy shouts as the 4 hop into the retro van and zoom off towards the trailer park!
To be Continued...
Trivia: Principal Antonucci is named after... take a good guess!
Character Inspiration: Paul is designed after one of my black friends in high school. He would always hit on girls, had a sex joke for each day, and had a Playboy collection in his bedroom. There were rumors that he peeped on girls, but I don't think he ever did (I just added that to Paul's character for more lulz).