So yeah, it's been way too long since I touched this thing. Blame it on the MONSTER essay I had to concoct, I suppose. I hope there are still people interested in this tale!

Chapter Seven

It was early evening when Kate finally awoke. Her quiet murmurs as she worked to breach the surface of consciousness were loud enough to break Rick from his own stupor.

"Kate? Hey. Come on now, wake up," he tenderly urged her, deftly running his fingers along her cheek. Slowly, she complied with his request. As her eyes fluttered open, he managed a weak smile.

Not that he wasn't happy to see her awake. It was what he had to tell her that burdened him. Never before had dread constricted his whole being as it did now. There were no wise words, no clever quotes, no empathetic euphemisms that he could use when he broke the news. For once, the writer of wrongs, the master of the macabre, couldn't produce the correct words.

He almost wanted to blurt it out, just as his second declaration of love had been yanked unceremoniously from his mouth. "Kate, you're paralyzed. And you'll never walk again." There was a tiny part of him that felt the clinical, stoic approach was kinder. It was certainly less patronizing. And if he said it with reasonable conviction, there would be no question of his truthfulness.

But there was no way he could bring himself to do that. Maybe if she were someone he barely knew, his conscience would allow him. Kate, however, was the exact opposite of this. She was too much a part of him to be treated so harshly. He loved her too much.

"Castle..." Her quiet voice brought him back. He gently squeezed her hand, rubbing smooth ellipses into her skin. "You there?" It appeared she had picked up on his brief mental distance.

"Yeah, yeah," he sighed. "I'm right here." He hoped his tone didn't sound too offhand. But if he tried to put any other inflection into his words, his worries would be revealed immediately to her.

"You sleep too?" she asked. Rick smiled, amazed that she was still thinking of him over herself when she was the one in the hospital bed. But then, he wasn't surprised. It was just one of the 47000 things he loved about her.

"A bit," he lied. The truth was, his all-consuming grief about her condition robbed any thought of sleep from his mind. But he didn't want her to fret over him.

"You're lying," she whispered. "I always know when you're lying, Rick Castle. Why didn't you sleep?"

He didn't want to answer. He couldn't...but he should...he couldn't...

"Because I've been trying to figure out how I'm going to tell you!" He tried to chase his own words, but they tumbled out of his mouth as though they were escaped prisoners. So much for the "non-blunt" approach he'd wanted to take.

"Tell me what?" Kate questioned, eyes filling with fear. "Rick, what are you talking about?" And now there was no way out. No excuse. No escape.

"Kate," he began, tightly grasping her hand. "It's just...you're so lucky to be here, you know? You could've died...you landed on the ground so hard...so, so hard, Kate."

"But I'm here, Rick. You and I both know that. So what do you need to tell me?" She hadn't missed the tears that were beginning to ribbon from his eyes.

"Kate, when you fell, you hurt your neck really badly. Oh...Kate...you're paralyzed. You're paralyzed, baby. The...the doctors...they said...well, they said you won't be able to walk." He covered his mouth with his free hand, as though somehow this could assuage his overwhelming grief.

"But this is just temporary, right? I'll get motion back soon, won't I?"

Rick wanted to throw up. How could he look her straight in her hopeful eyes and break her heart? How could he give her more grief, more pain? How? He loved her more than his life and now his words were about to destroy hers.

"No, Kate. You probably never will." He watched through tear-smeared vision as Kate's face fell. Her eyes dropped until he couldn't see her pupils anymore. Her breathing suddenly became shallow and ragged.

"Why?" The question was barely above a whisper. It didn't even seem inquisitive. It was a dull, thunking word that punctuated the air and then dissipated.

"I don't know, Sweetheart. I don't know." Rick suddenly got up from his chair. Ignoring hospital protocol, ignoring the protests of his aching, nearly-atrophic muscles, he clambered into the bed. Careful to avoid bumping her and causing further damage, he wrapped his arms around Kate's battered body. She felt rigid against him, so unlike the countless times he'd snuggled against her during the long nights. But it was still her, and that was what mattered most.

"I love you so much, okay? So much. We can get through this and you have to believe me on that one. We will make it through. I will help you through everything and be there for you every bit of it." He hoped against hope that his words were able to bring some level of comfort to her. Kissing her cheek, his lips a litany of love against her skin, Rick could already feel the tears cascading down her face.

"I love you," Kate managed to mumble. "I think I...I need to go back to sleep, okay?" He knew that her sudden need for rest wasn't motivated by exhaustion or by painkillers.

Maybe when she woke up, it would all turn out to be a dream.

"Okay, Kate. Sleep now. Just remember I love you, all right?" He pressed his lips to her forehead, allowing them to linger there for several moments, breathing her in.

And as she slept, he clutched her to him, as if somehow, by some miracle, he could protect her from the accident, from the injuries that covered her body, from the immense grief that now consumed her.

From the world.

This chapter feels really short to me, but honestly, I feel like the whole reveal has more emotion when it is contained in one chapter with no other events to take away from the climactic moment when he finally tells her the full truth. (PS I listened to Come What May and I Just Want You, among other songs, so I hope my *feels* that I get from both those pieces translate well-plus aren't both of those great songs for fangirls?) Sorry for the shortness and delay. Feel free to leave feedback...or not. Not going to whine about review count! The fact that people even read this is enough praise.