SCENE 34 - THE MORGENDORFFER/MOGI HOUSE
(David/Soujiro and Quinn/Yuiko are at the kitchen table, in the midst of another tutoring session)
David/Soujiro - But when the workers stormed the Bastille, they only found seven prisoners, and one of them was the Marquis de Sade.
Quinn/Yuiko - Eww.
David/Soujiro- That's more or less the way they felt.
Quinn/Yuiko - Did Marie Antoinette really have the champagne glasses molded after her... you know? (giggles)
David/Soujiro - We really should be focusing more on the politics of the Revolution, but that's what they say. If she'd been a different body type, we'd be drinking champagne out of bowls.
(they both laugh as Helen/Erin and Jake/Jiro enter the room)
Helen/Erin – Daifuku-sensei, I must say I'm quite impressed. I've never seen our Yui have so much fun studying.
Quinn/Yuiko - That's because in school they only teach you the really boring stuff. Mom? Dad? Did you know Marie Antoinette never said "let them eat cake?" That expression comes from a story about a princess, written by Rousseau. Right?
David/Soujiro - Right.
Jake/Jiro - Lousy tabloids.
(uncomfortable pause)
Helen/Erin - We've got to run. Bye.
Jake/Jiro - (offscreen) Wait... um, I was joking.
Helen/Erin - (offscreen) You were not.
Jake/Jiro - (offscreen) I know.
Quinn/Yuiko - Was Marie Antoinette pretty?
David/Soujiro - They said she was a great beauty. Of course, you won't find a lot of people willing to call their absolute monarch butt-ugly.
Quinn/Yuiko - Sensei, do you think... I'm pretty?
David/Soujiro - Sure.
Quinn/Yuiko - By the way, have you been to Chez Pierre? Because it's really nice if you ever wanted to take me there. And it would be kind of educational, since we're studying French history and stuff.
David/Soujiro - Thanks, but you don't want to be seen around town with an egghead. Your friends would behead you. (looks at watch) Well, that's about it for today. (gathers his backpack and stands) Now, be sure to read the chapter on the Industrial Revolution, and don't forget your vocabulary words. I'll be back for more pedagogy next week. (silence) Mogi-kun? Pedagogy? That's one of the words. (leaves)
Quinn/Yuiko - Yeah. Pedagogy.
SCENE 35 – Otose-sama's Manga Studio
(Everyone is painting in the common room, with Daniel Dotson/Otose-sama critiquing each assistant's work)
Daniel/Otose - (to Jet/Chie) Excellent. The brushwork is very confident, and I love the strained, almost antagonistic relationship with shadow. Really, you remind me of myself when I was young.
Jet/Chie - Oh, Sensei. You're not old.
Daniel/Otose - Well, I'm certainly young... at heart.
Jane/Michiko - Not to mention delusional of mind.
(Jane/Michiko puts down her brush and walks away. On the page, we see a dark sketch of a woman trapped inside a small safe, screaming in frustration. The woman bears a remarkable similarity to Jane/Michiko. Outside, Jane/Michiko and Alison/Arisa approach from different directions)
Alison/Arisa - Hey.
Jane/Michiko - Hey.
Alison/Arisa - Haven't seen you around.
Jane/Michiko - Oh, you know, the solitary artist. Look, I gotta be honest. That whole thing that happened between - I mean, didn't happen - well, it kind of confused me.
Alison/Arisa - Me, too. Maybe I was hoping a little too hard and saw something that wasn't there.
Jane/Michiko - But you said you never make a mistake in that, um... area.
Alison/Arisa - There's a first time for everything. Still want to be friends?
Jane/Michiko - Sure.
(Alison/Arisa goes to hug Jane/Michiko, who backs off slightly)
Alison/Arisa - Um, maybe we'll skip the hug.
(Jane/Michiko sees Daniel Dotson/Otose-sama approach)
Jane/Michiko - Uh-oh... don't look now, but it's Takeshi Obaka (1).
Daniel/Otose - (to Alison/Arisa) Ready?
Alison/Arisa - Just a minute.
Daniel/Otose - I'll wait for you in the car. (pinches her butt before walking off)
Jane/Michiko - You're seeing him?
Alison/Arisa - He's not so bad once you get to know him.
Jane/Michiko - You said he went through more students than tubes of paint. You can't possibly think he gives a damn about you.
Alison/Arisa - Who's looking for romance? I just want to have a little fun.
Jane/Michiko - And if it's with someone who can introduce you to a few gallery owners, that's not so bad either, eh? I think I'm beginning to see how the art world works.
Alison/Arisa - God, high school. It's all such a big deal with you guys. You take everything so seriously. (leaves)
Jane/Michiko - Like someone telling you you give off gay vibes just because they're trying to get into your pants.
SCENE 36 - THE "OKAY TO CRY CORRAL"
(It's the last day of camp, and the kids are gathered around the front as Mr. O'Neil/Oishi-senseil gives a good-bye speech.)
Mr. O'Neill/Oishi-sensei - Well, campers, before you go, let's take a moment to reflect on the valuable lessons we've learned about ours...
Boy - Let Satori-Ojisan talk!
Mr. O'Neill/Oishi-sensei - ...um, about ourselves and the growth that only we can...
Girl - Ojisan! He's cool!
(kids clamor for 'Satori-Ojisan")
Mr. DeMartino/Temari-sensei - Thank you, campers. Remember: if you feel yourself getting mad, go ahead! If someone's doing something to irritate you, tell them about it in detail! And hike... whenever you feel like it!
(the kids cheer)
Mr. O'Neill/Oishi-sensei - I... I guess maybe I've been doing more harm than good...
Mr. DeMartino/Temari-sensei - (embraces Mr. O'Neill/Oishi-sensei) Thank you, Chiyosuke. You've reawakened my hunger to enlighten. I want to teach again!
Mr. O'Neill/Oishi-sensei - Ooh... um, that hurts a bit. (laughs nervously)
(Daria approaches Link/Rinku as he heads for the bus)
Daria - Hey, slow down.
Link/Rinku - Go to hell!
Daria - Just hear me out. Oishi-sensei didn't ask me to speak to you, and I would never tell him anything anyway, except my name, rank and homeroom number.
Link/Rinku - Yeah, right.
Daria - Look, I'm not good at this kind of thing - probably because I've never done this kind of thing - but if you ever need someone to talk to, um... I'm around.
Link/Rinku - I don't need anyone to talk to. Especially you.
(Link/Rinku walks away, leaving behind a very dejected Daria)
SCENE 37 - THE MORGENDORFFER/MOGI HOUSE
(The doorbell rings. Helen/Erin opens the door and finds Tom/Tomohiro standing on the stoop.)
Helen/Erin – Tsurugi-kun! Come in. Daria! Tsurugi-kun's here to see you. Jiro and I are so sorry we won't be able to make the museum benefit. Normally we love museums. In fact, we were thinking of seeing the Jomon Era pottery exhibit this week.
Tom/Tomohiro - Um, that exhibit left a year ago.
Helen/Erin - Oh... (chuckles nervously)
(outside, Daria and Tom/Tomohiro head down the walk towards his car)
Tom/Tomohiro - Well, at least you can be confident your mother's not addicted to sedatives.
Daria - Hey, she didn't ask to be invited to that stupid fund-raiser.
Tom/Tomohiro - My mother was just trying to be nice. A lot of people like going to those things.
Daria – Sure: helping the little people while avoiding contact with them at all cost.
Tom/Tomohiro - Um, is something wrong?
Daria - No.
Tom/Tomohiro - Come on. I had to beg you to come out tonight, and then the first thing you do is jump down my throat. What's going on?
Daria - I don't know. It's the museum. And the country club. And your family. You know, your whole elitist world.
Tom/Tomohiro - It's not elitist. And it's not my world.
Daria - Don't tell me. Tell Aunt Haruka tomorrow when you get to your island resort. And be sure not to mention me to her, okay?
Tom/Tomohiro - What?
Daria - It's obvious you don't want me mixing with your family, since you didn't ask me to the fund-raiser or the fireworks display.
Tom/Tomohiro – Mogi-san, I didn't invite you to those things because I sure as hell didn't want to go and I assumed you wouldn't either. Right?
Daria - Well, you still should have asked.
Tom/Tomohiro - You're right.
Daria - Unless you just assumed your parents were gonna hate me.
Tom/Tomohiro - What? What are you talking about? My parents think you're great. They know you're really smart and headed for college and stuff. It's not like you're Michi-Michi.
Daria - What do you mean, "not like I'm Michi-Michi?" She's smart.
Tom/Tomohiro - (oops!) Yeah, I know she's smart. But she could go to Tokyo U (2) or spend the rest of her days painting tiles, and her parents wouldn't care either way. If we did that, our parents would have a fit.
Daria - So what you're saying is Michi-Michi isn't up to your family's standards. God, you're a snob.
Tom/Tomohiro - Damn it, Mogi-san! Quit trying to pick a fight with me!
Daria - Excuse me?
Tom/Tomohiro - You attack my mother for inviting your parents to the fund-raiser, and then attack me for not inviting you. You say my family disapproves of you, I say they relate to you better than Michi-Michi, and now I'm a snob.
Daria - Forgive me for being a loyal friend.
Tom/Tomohiro - Why don't you say what you're really afraid of: the idea that you might actually start caring about someone. 'Cause that would make you vulnerable.
Daria - Look, maybe we just jumped into this dating stuff too fast. Maybe we need to take a break.
Tom/Tomohiro - A break? From what? We haven't done anything! Come on, Mogi-san! (Daria doesn't respond) I don't believe this. (still nothing) Well, I'm not going to stand here and beg. (nope, nothing) Fine. Nice knowing you. (gets into his car, pounds once on the steering wheel, and drives away)
Daria - (sadly) Yeah, nice knowing you.
SCENE 38 - DEPARTMENT STORE
(the Fashion Club is browsing in the Junior 5 section)
Sandi/Sen - Gee, Mogi, it's sweet of you to take time out from your studies to be with the friends you've neglected all summer.
Quinn/Yuiko - Oh, Sempai, I just wish I were as smart as you so I wouldn't need a tutor. You know, Daifuku-sensei's kind of funny.
Sandi/Sen - If by funny you mean extraordinarily unpleasant, I agree completely. That's why I was forced to terminate his services.
Tiffany/Chizuru - Otaku.
Stacy/Satsuki - I know! And so... geeky!
Quinn/Yuiko - But he said...
Sandi/Sen - Yes?
Quinn/Yuiko - Nothing. I guess he is a little geeky, although I wouldn't be surprised if some people thought he was cute, you know, in that brainy kind of way.
Sandi/Sen - Mogi? Are you trying to tell us something?
Quinn/Yuiko - Me? Oh, no, of course not! Ooh, look! Intermediate markdowns!
(The distraction works, as the others scramble over to the marked-down clothes.)
SCENE 39 - THE MORGENDORFFER/MOGI HOUSE
(Daria is alone in her room, laying on the bed and second-guessing her second-guesses about Tom/Tomohiro)
Daria - Of course I did the right thing. He's from his world, I'm from mine. Never would have worked. I mean, unless I tried or something.
(Quinn/Yuiko enters the room, holding a copy of something)
Quinn/Yuiko - Here's your book.
Daria - Um, that's not mine.
Quinn/Yuiko - Oh, right. I borrowed it from Daifuku-sensei. Um, what do you think of him?
Daria - Seems like a nice guy. And he obviously has a high threshold for pain. Why?
Quinn/Yuiko- No reason. Do you think he's... cute?
Daria - Well, I suppose in that not-a-brain-dead-surfer kind of way.
Quinn/Yuiko - Yeah...
Daria - I know you may find this hard to believe, but looks aren't everything.
Quinn/Yuiko - Really?
Daria - See, there's this thing called personality? There's also liking the same things, having a similar sense of humor, being able to have five-minute conversations without boring the living hell out of each other...
Quinn/Yuiko - Like you and Tsurugi-san.
Daria - Did I mention Tsurugi-kun?
Quinn/Yuiko - Well, who else would you be talking about? You're obviously very compatible.
Daria - How would you know?
Quinn/Yuiko – Oneechan (3), up until recently dating has been my major field of study!
Daria - Well, you've never met his family.
Quinn/Yuiko - You can't judge someone by their family. What if people judged me by... blech! Got to go. (leaves)
Daria - That's it. Must... contact... intelligent... life. (picks up phone and dials)
(at the manga studio dorm, Jane/Michiko is sketching on her pad when Anais/Hanako reaches up to her bunk)
Anaise/Hanako - Hey. Call.
(Jane/Michiko picks up the phone)
Jane/Michiko – Moshi moshi?
(split-screen between Jane/Michiko and Daria)
Daria - Hope you don't mind that I called.
Jane/Michiko - Daria!
Daria - How are things going?
Jane - Fine, fine, fine. Couldn't be better.
Daria - Sucks, huh?
Jane/Michiko - Only in a mind-numbingly pretentious kind of way.
Daria - Do you think, um, a familiar face might cheer you up?
Jane/Michiko - What do you mean? Like floating in space over the bed, saying my name over and over again in a creepy voice?
Daria – Michi-Michi...
Jane/Michiko - Look, I don't really feel like any visitors right now. It's nothing personal.
Daria - Wait...
Jane/Michiko - I don't want to talk about it, okay? Nothing you could say can change that.
(pause)
Daria - I'll pay you.
Jane/Michiko - (laughs) Aniki (4) was going to drop by on his way to a gig. Maybe you can hitch a ride. They can always use an extra person to push.
(Daria lets out a small smile)
To be continued…
A play on Death Note, Bakuman and Blue Dragon manga artist Takeshi Obata. Baka means stupid or idiot.
Tokyo University is the most prestigious school in Japan.
An informal and close way of saying "Big sister"
An informal and close way of saying "Big brother"
*Script is courtesy of Outpost Daria