Chapter 7: Brother and Sister

"I'm stumped," Alex sighed.

He and Nami were sprawled out on the beach. She held a large sakura shell in her hands.

"I am, too," she sighed, "We need someone close to dad."

They stared at the clouds, watching them slowly expand along the sky, flowing apart and fusing together, as if scared of separating for too long.

"Maybe Shelly?" Alex suggested.
"Maybe," Nami agreed, "Or…I'unno, that Anissa chick from Luna's story might know something."
"I doubt they spoke after the wedding. She sounded pretty hurt."
"I think it's a really good bet, actually."

Nami stood over him, looking serious. He shrugged and pushed himself up.

"If that's what you think, then let's try," he agreed, "We've got nothing else to go on."

They ventured into Flute Fields again, this time headed towards the Marimba Farm. Alex smiled in nostalgia, the thoughts of his adventures here with mom flooding into his mind. They always bought their seeds and saplings here and, once in a while, flowers.

"Do you know these people well?" Nami asked nervously.
"I came often and they were always nice, but mom usually avoided too much small talk," Alex answered, "Taylor and I got along pretty well, though."

Nami nodded nervously, and Alex knew she felt just as invasive as he did. Unlike the others, Anissa's family had always been distant, and Anissa herself even more after the wedding. Despite all of this, they were out of options. The siblings took a deep breath and walked into the old home, faced with rows upon rows of fresh produce and long-faced Ruth watching them from behind the counter, her normally bored expression slightly lit by curiosity.

"Well, I've never seen you two before," she said, a twang of light southern accent dusting her words, "Running a farm, too?"
"Not quite," Alex said, "We did ages ago, but, well…it's been a long time."

Ruth cocked a brow. Nami sighed, grabbed a tuft of Alex's hair, and lifted it into a ponytail. All at once, Ruth's baffled expression turned to one of familiarity, and she courteously smiled and bowed her head.

"I didn't even realize," she said, her voice softening to a more motherly tone, "You two are Jin's children. Are you well?"

Nami was silent, trying to figure out how that actually worked.

"We're alright. No worse than when we left," Alex answered.
"Ah, good. How's the city?"
"…Different."
"I would expect so."

She offered the kids some fresh apples.

"Just picked 'em out of the greenhouse," she said courteously as they nervously accepted them, "So, where's your mother? I haven't seen Rei in years." She was looking behind them, as if expecting her to suddenly appear. "You kids didn't come alone, did you?"
"Actually, yes, we did," Nami said, shrugging, "Mom's still in the city. Alex and I came alone to see Papa."
"But he's on business, so we've just been hanging around," Alex finished, "Don't worry. Everyone's taken good care of us. We've been visiting some of our parents' old friends, and Mayor Hamilton was kind enough to set us up at the inn."
"How thoughtful of him," Ruth commented.
"Yeah."

Alex went silent for a moment.

"Look," he finally continued, "I know this is going to sound sort of awkward, but…I was hoping you wouldn't mind if we chatted with Anissa…about dad."

Ruth hesitated for a moment, then beckoned them into the kitchen and ran for the kettle.

"Oh, wonderful, another tea party," Nami murmured under her breath as Alex suppressed a laugh. Admittedly, he was getting sick of it, too, but the simple customs of Castanet were a warm welcome compared to the cold indifference of the city. After the kettle was set and heating, Ruth sat down with them.

"First and foremost, why did you three leave?" she asked bluntly.
"That's what we wanna know," Nami answered, slightly off-guard.
"…You don't know either?" she said, blinking at them in confusion.
"Nope," Alex said, shaking his head.

Ruth went silent for a moment.

"Did they fight?" she asked.
"Never," Alex answered, "It came out of nowhere. Dad never said a word to you about anything?"
"No. Anissa told us he was absolutely crushed."
"So were we," Nami murmured, "She just woke us up and packed the essentials. We barely got to say bye to him…"

Alex flinched and pat her shoulder. His clearest memory of their last moments had been the vision of Nami clinging to Jin's coat, begging to stay. The whistling tea kettle brought him back to reality, and Ruth quickly made the tea and set their cups on the table. Nobody rushed for a sip.

"Anissa and Taylor should be home soon," she said, "I'm sure Anissa won't mind speaking to you two if it means finding some answers, but I can't guarantee how much she'll know. Jin's become incredibly closed off ever since Rei took you."
"So we've heard," Nami sighed, staring at the steam wafting up from her teacup.
"Taylor, on the other hand, will be thrilled to see you, Alex," Ruth continued, "Just do me a favor and don't cause any trouble this time."
"I think we're past that stage," Alex chuckled nervously.
"Maybe you are. He's not."

Ruth shook her head and stood. Nami nibbled on her apple. Alex sipped his tea.

"Holy crap, is that the famous Alex back from the dead?" a bright voice called.

A muddy blonde-haired boy burst into the kitchen, followed by his bored old father, Craig.

"Yo, Taylor," Alex said, standing and high-fiving his old friend.
"Dude, it's been ages!" Taylor cried, pulling Alex into a one-armed hug and messing up his hair, "Hey, how's the city? I'm dying to go!"

Nami eyed him irritably.

"It's…not for everyone," Alex admitted sheepishly.

Taylor clapped him on the shoulder.

"It's good man," he said, "You and your sister ain't exactly the city types. Here to stay?"
"I wish…"
"Sucks, man."

Taylor hadn't changed much from childhood. His hair was even more spiked than it had been in youth, and the air of a wild and free spirit still surrounded him.

"I could see you having fun there," Alex said, "Don't let us kill it for you. If circumstances were different, we could probably learn to like it."

Nami suppressed a hiss.

"Okay, what exactly is going on here?" asked Craig's somber voice, his eyes glancing over the kitchen, "Not often this house is so busy."
"Jin's kids, Craig," Ruth explained.
"Oh. I see."

He extended a hand to both kids, then poured himself a cup of tea.

"How's your mom?" he asked.
"Quiet," Alex answered, "How's dad been?"
"Quiet."

The room went silent for a moment. Ruth looked around nervously, and Craig stared glumly into his teacup.

"Sad, really. Those two really did bring out the best in each other. Always hurts to watch so much regression. Brought each other out of their shells, only to retreat back into 'em…"

He sipped his tea serenely.

"Shells?" Nami asked, "I mean, dad's a no-brainer, but mom was always loud and open and crazy, according to Luna."

Craig smirked at her.

"You've got a lot to learn about people, kid," he sighed, sipping again, "Being loud don't necessarily mean being open, you know."

She stared at him, half fascinated and half offended.

"Anyway, Jin's been really distant the past few years," Craig continued, "Used to drop by on Sundays for dinner. We don't see none of that no more. Boy's a little more disconnected every time I catch a glimpse of him. You'd think we had some huge falling out, the way we talk now. It's as if we're strangers again."

Nami looked troubled. Ruth avoided any and all eye contact. Alex and Taylor remained fixated on Craig.

"For his sake, you two, do me a favor and let him know how much you miss him," Craig sighed wisely, dumping a little sugar into his tea, "He's breaking. Trying hard not to for the sake of his patients, but a few more cracks appear every day, and a guy can only take so much. I imagine you three are facing the same ordeal, but forgive me when I say Jin seems to be taking it worst."

Alex glanced to Nami.

"Second worst," he said quietly, wrapping his arms around his sister. She buried herself into him, "If it's alright, Craig, sir, may I ask what went on between Jin and Anissa? From what I understand, they were close, right? Do you think she'd know anything?"

Craig stared for a moment, then cleared his throat.

"My daughter has managed to stay rather close to him, least as much as he'll allow," he said, leaning back in his chair, "Jin's been a family friend for ages, so she's put in a lot of effort to keep him close. From what I know, though, he won't talk much despite her efforts."
"I see," Alex said, sipping his own tea, "Do you know when she might be back?"
"If she sticks to the normal schedule, about an hour," Craig said, "I don't know if she'll know much. Jin's kept pretty silent about the whole ordeal. But he might've told her something. Give it a shot."
"Right. We'll be back in an hour then."

He stood, gently guiding Nami up with him.

"Thanks for your time," he said courteously, "This has been a huge help."
"You're welcome, and you're also more than welcome to wait here for Anissa," Ruth said.
"That's very kind, but I think we need a little air."
"Understandable," Craig said, "See you in an hour."

=^x^=

"So awkward," Nami muttered.
"You said it…" Alex sighed.

They were lying in the grass outside of the Yodel Barn with Rosie, their heads resting on her side. She was nuzzling Nami's cheek with her nose. Both pet her absentmindedly.

"Maybe my idea was bad," Nami said uncertainly, "Maybe Anissa was a bad lead. I kinda feel uncomfortable asking her now…"
"Why?" Alex asked, "I mean, yeah, that was awkward, but I think it's promising. She's still close to dad, so I think she'll know something."
"But Ruth and Craig didn't know anything."
"Anissa probably kept everything to herself. Of course they wouldn't know."
"You think?"
"Yeah. Have some faith."

They mulled about for a little while. Alex gave Nami another riding lesson. She rode more calmly, the uncertainty no longer weighing her down.

"It's better knowing Rosie won't throw me," she said, riding steadily along.

Alex watched from a safe distance until the time to meet Anissa drew near, and he signaled her over.

"It's been an hour," he said, "Let's get back and hope she's around."
"Right…"

She hopped off and left Rosie outside to graze. They returned to the farm, spotting Craig outside tending to the crops. He beckoned to them and pointed to the house.

"She's home," he said, "Best of luck."

Upon walking in, Anissa introduced herself and led the two into her bedroom. She gestured towards her desk and an armchair by her bookshelf, then sat on her bed facing them.

"Mother filled me in," she said, "She mentioned you two wanting to know about Jin."
"Yeah," Nami said quietly, "We were hoping you might have some insight on things."

Anissa nodded sadly.

"Well, to begin, he has become a very different person over the years," she began, "He's almost unrecognizable from the time when you two still lived here. He's gone very cold, and he spends as little time around people as possible. According to Irene, he barely speaks to her anymore unless it involves business."
"I see," Nami murmured softly.
"He also spends very little time at home. He's at the clinic almost all hours of the day. We don't know why or what he's doing, but I've seen the light on past midnight on occasion. He refuses to answer the door if I knock."

Alex looked to Nami. She was watching Anissa, reading every expression, the heavy weight of it all slowly crushing her as she realized all of this was completely true.

"Do you two still speak at all?" Alex asked.
"On occasion, when I force it," Anissa answered, "If I go during normal hours, he'll speak a little bit. I've actually been bringing him lunch every now and then. He's gotten thinner…"
"Scary thinner?" Nami asked.
"Not quite…"
"Good…"

Anissa shook her head.

"Everything about him is scary lately," she sighed, "He's holding up, but it's one of those 'How long can you live like this' things. He always looks like he hasn't slept in days, he's glued to his books, and he's gone almost completely reclusive. It's…scary."

Nami shook her head.

"Did you talk to him after we left?" Alex asked.
"Actually, yes, the day after," Anissa answered.
"Did he say anything about it? Any clues as to why?"
"Nothing specific…just said it was beyond his control, possibly beyond Rei's, too. It sounded like a tough situation, whatever it was."

Nami stood and walked over to her, taking her hand in hers.

"We need you to tell us everything," she said in a serious tone, "All you remember. Please."

Anissa nodded, and Nami backed away, standing beside Alex.

"Be warned," she said, "It's a very painful memory…"

=^x^=

Anissa's Memory

"Hello, Miss Irene."
"Ah…Anissa…"

I immediately knew something was off. Irene looked older, completely distracted.

"What's wrong?" I asked.
"It's Jin," she said quietly, shaking her head, "I can't explain for him. It's his choice to say..."

I stared for a moment in numb astonishment, nearly dropping the teacups clutched in my hands. I hurriedly bowed my head and half ran into Jin's office, drops of tea spilling behind me. Jin was sitting at his desk, downcast, not writing or reading as he usually would. I steadied myself and walked up beside him, placing one cup on the desk. He remained still and silent.

"Jin?" I asked.
"Wha…?"

He wore the same distracted expression as Irene. His eyes were shadowed and slightly red.

"Oh…hi, Anissa," he murmured.

I pulled up my usual chair and sat beside him. His eyes were cast to the floor. Had he slept last night?

"Are you alright?" I finally asked, "You and Irene seem off, and you especially look…forgive me, but you look awful, Jin."

Jin shook his head, his eyes closed. He looked so defeated.

"I'm alone…" he whispered.
"Alone?" I asked, "Jin, you have so many people who love you. Why would you feel alone?"

I placed my hand on his shoulder, smiling weakly, hoping to comfort him. He just shook his head again, his entire body shaking. Tears were forming faster than he could wipe them away.

"No…Anissa, they're gone…"
"Who's gone?"
"Rei…and my kids…"

His voice broke and he buried his head into his hands.

"Wait, how are they gone?" I asked, my mind racing to a million conclusions, "Jin, what happened?"

He said nothing. He was shaking, trying to compose himself, and all I could do was wait. I didn't know what to say or how to comfort him.

"Jin, what can I do?" I asked helplessly.
"There's nothing," he whispered, "I don't know what to do. I feel lost…"
"You can start by telling me," I pleaded, "Talking it out will help. We can sort things out…"

Jin merely shrugged.

"Why did she leave?" I asked.
"I can't say," he whispered.
"You need to…"
"I can't…"
"But you're breaking down, Jin. Was it an argument? Did she go far? I'll go talk to her, Jin. I'll bring her back."
"You can't bring her back…"
"Why can't I?"
"Because she left Castanet, Anissa!"

His shout echoed off the clinic's walls. He buried his head into his arms on his desk, shaking, crying. I didn't want to watch, but I couldn't tear myself away. I could only sit and watch him suffer. I reached out to hug him and was shrugged off, unwanted. What could I do…?

"There was no argument," he whispered, his voice shaky, "Everything that happened is beyond my control. There's nothing you can do to help me, Anissa. There's nothing any of us can do…"

His sobs were becoming more audible.

"She didn't want to go. The kids begged not to go. Nami ripped a hole in my shirt because Rei literally had to pry her off. She cried. My little girl's crying and there's nothing I can do. My son's trying to be strong for her, but I saw it. Just as upset as his sister…"
"Jin…"
"But they had to go…I had to make them listen to her. They had no choice…and they will probably despise me for it. Despise her…"
"Jin…why couldn't you follow…?"
"I can't tell you…"
"Don't feel obligated to stay for us, Jin."
"You couldn't be farther from the truth, Anissa…"

I was getting frustrated.

"Why can't you tell me?" I asked bitterly, "I've always kept your secrets, Jin."
"This is different," he whispered, "I…promised her. I can't…"
"You're so dedicated to her secrets, and look what it's done to you!"

The teacup on his desk ended up shattered on the wall. We both went silent. He avoided looking at me, his body still shaking, his hands tightly drawn into fists.

"You have no right…" he finally seethed, his voice suddenly coarse, "You're overstepping your bounds, Anissa."
"Maybe I am, but I'm also sitting here watching my best friend writhing in pain, and a wall of secrets demands he suffer alone. It's not right, Jin!"
"I demand it, Anissa."
"How do you expect to cope, then?"
"I don't."

He said it so coldly. I couldn't respond.

"Nothing can fix this, Anissa," he said, breathing slowly, regaining composure, "I've lost my entire world, and so have my kids and my wife. None of us will cope until we're back together."

He held his hands to his chest.

"You don't understand how much this is killing me," he whispered, a note of anger still present, but forcibly subdued, "Not a day has gone by where I haven't held my kids. I've denied them nothing. Now I can't even so much as say good night. And Rei…I can't sleep if she's not with me…"
"Jin…"
"I feel like I've broken every promise I've made to my children. I promised them I would always be there, and now I'm not…"

I couldn't take it anymore. I reached out, wrapped my arms around him, and pulled him into a tight hug. He flinched, but didn't resist this time. His head rested on my shoulder.

"Listen to me," I said, "You said so yourself that it was beyond your control. You haven't broken any promises, and none of it is your fault. Your kids, Rei…they love you. I'm sure they will find a way home, back to you…"
"I feel like it's so futile…" he whispered, "My perfect world broke so easily. Now I may never hold my kids again…"
"Don't lose hope like that. Be strong for them. Live for them."

He slowly wrapped his arms around me and sobbed into my shoulder, the small sounds of his breath inching into my ear.

"I just wish for one last moment," he whispered, "Just one last moment with them…"
"Is that really all?" I asked gently.

Jin was silent for a moment, then shook his head, his grip tightening as another sob escaped him.

"No…"

=^x^=

Nami slowly stood and left the room, wordless, her entire body quivering. Alex remained in his seat, his body flinching slightly when she closed the door. Anissa stared after her, hands folded in her lap, her long brown hair draped delicately over her shoulders. She looked back to Alex.

"Will she be okay?"
"Eventually, yes."

He slowly rose to his feet and stretched out, trying to shake off the tense atmosphere that had descended upon the room.

"The way Jin spoke…it was so eerie," Anissa sighed, shaking her head, "Despite how much he wanted to keep Rei's secrets, I could tell how badly he just wanted to tell me. In some ways, I felt like he was trying to. Bits and pieces, constantly alluding to a lack of control…"
"It sounds like mom was forced out," Alex said, slowly pacing about the room, "If that's true, it would explain a lot. Mom has become a completely different person ever since we left."
"How so?" Anissa asked.

Alex thought for a moment.

"She's nearly mute," he said, pulling his chair a bit closer to Anissa and sitting down in front of her, "Not by force, but by choice. It's like she's scared, but it's also because I think she's just run out of lies to feed me and Nami."
"What kinds of lies?"
"Excuses as to why we left. She used to give us really vague answers, but now it's degraded to silence. Whatever the reason, she literally cannot say it."

Anissa leaned back, her eyes fixed on the ceiling.

"Do you recall her ever being in any trouble?" she asked, refocusing on Alex, "Any mysterious disappearances? Weird phone calls? Strange visits?"
"Nothing," he answered, "Nothing ever seemed weird until that one night, when we all left."
"What happened that night?"
"It's a little fuzzy…"

He took a moment to think, slowly clearing the fog from his memories.

"Nami and I were sleeping. Mom shook me awake, and she looked scared. She told me to pack anything important in my backpack. Then she did the same to Nami…and Nami was really young at the time, so she couldn't understand anything and was throwing an absolute fit. Mom ended up packing for her and dragging her out of bed…"

He took another moment, his eyes closed.

"And then we went downstairs, and I remember all the lights were on, and dad was just sitting at the table in complete silence and Nami went running to him asking every question she could think of. And he just hugged her and hugged me and kept saying how sorry he was. Nothing reassuring. No hope for reuniting. Just 'I'm so sorry' over and over and it was getting Nami so painfully mad and she was screaming and crying and I remember mom looked really…just really devastated."
"And then?" Anissa asked.
"…I remember mom whispering something to dad, and then she took my hand and Nami's hand and Nami kept pulling away, and then dad got really stern with her, told her to be completely quiet and go with mom, and it was dad so of course Nami shut right up and did what she was told…"
"She really respects Jin, huh…"

Anissa sighed, and so did Alex.

"Like you wouldn't believe," he said, "You'd expect most boys to gravitate towards their dads, and girls to their moms, but Nami and I went in opposite directions. I was always with mom. She was always with dad. In her case, it was more one-sided. It started when mom wouldn't teach her to ride a horse and sort of escalated from there. She told me she always felt mom favored me, so she started only listening to dad, but she also really clung to him."

Anissa observed him thoughtfully.

"You'd think it'd be the other way around," she said, "Kids often desire what they can't obtain. You'd think she'd constantly attach to Rei in order to gain her favor…"
"Yeah, well, Nami has this unique talent of recognizing when something's impossible, at least in her eyes."

Alex shrugged.

"But I don't think mom favored me or anything. I think she had her reasons for some of the unfair things that happened to Nami. The whole Juniper situation helps prove that. In a way, I feel like Nami and I had different mothers. I had the blissful, happy-go-lucky mother, and Nami had a mother whose light had burnt out. That and…I think mom knew from the get-go that Nami would always be attached to dad."
"She gave them their time and didn't interfere," Anissa finished, nodding, "It's possible."

Alex looked around the room for a few moments, his eyes passing over the clutter of books on her desk, the family pictures on her walls. He slowly stood and walked over to a picture of her and Jin, both much younger, arm in arm and laughing. He observed it for a few moments.

"…Do you hate her?" he asked.
"What?" she replied in slight confusion.
"My mother…Did you hate her for…well…"

He nodded at the picture.

"You and dad were close, right?" he continued, "From the stories I've heard…"
"It's true, I did have some negative feelings towards Rei for a long time," Anissa interrupted, not wanting Alex's reasoning to go much further, "I'd known Jin since I was very little. My heart had set itself on him…"

She shook her head.

"But I never hated Rei. Jin loved her, I loved Jin. Loving somebody means wanting what is best for them."
"Does that mean you hate mom now? Because of what she's done?"

She went silent. Alex gently paced about again, tracing the floorboards with his feet.

"Nami hates mom," he said softly, "I've tried so hard to not let it happen. I've always defended her. But the longer this goes on, the more I run out of justifications."

He gazed at Anissa, a dull pain in his eyes.

"Do you think she's right to hate her?"
"No…because Jin said himself that he didn't want you two to despise her."

Anissa stood and gently placed her hands on his shoulders.

"Your father let slip just enough to assure me that none of this was Rei's fault," she said gently, her eyes meeting his, "If Jin had thought, even for a moment, that Rei had done this for some completely insane reason, you can bet he wouldn't have let you two leave this island. Separation has not been kind to any of you. Jin wouldn't have allowed it."
"You think so..?"
"Yes. I know so. I know your father. I know he loves you two. He never would have let you go through all this pain and confusion without just cause."

Her grip tightened a little.

"Alex, do not hate her. For Jin's sake…"

He was silent for a moment before slowly nodding at her, wiping a tear away from his eye. Anissa's grip loosened, her expression softening.

"You've tried so hard, haven't you?" she asked softly, "It can't be easy, filling that hole they've created."

Alex shook his head, the tears still sneaking out little by little.

"Nami always forgets I loved dad, too," he whispered, his voice cracking a little, "She thinks that just because I still love mom that I don't love him too. But she's wrong. Everything I do for her, I do because it's what dad would do. I do it because I want dad to hurt just that much less when we unload all of this on him."

Anissa gently rubbed his shoulder.

"You can't be him, though, Alex…"
"I know…"
"You need to say this to her."

He slowly looked up at her.

"You've spent so long talking to her like a father that you haven't talked to her like a brother," Anissa said gently, "So go tell her all of this, okay? Talk to your sister…as a brother, this time, okay?"

He wiped his eyes and nodded. She grabbed a few tissues off her desk and handed them to him.

"Calm down," she said softly, "Go find her…"

After a few moments, he thanked Anissa and left the farm, clutching his jacket as a rush of cold air hit him. He instinctively walked towards Flute Fields, and sure enough, Nami was back with Rosie. She lay at her side, her head buried into the mare's long white mane. Alex slowly sat beside her, gently prodding her shoulder.

"I'm sorry," she whispered.

He didn't say anything. He just wrapped his arms around her and pulled her into a hug. She turned and buried herself into him, softly sobbing, her cheeks stained red.

"I just hate that we've all gone through all of this, just for mom's secrets," she murmured.
"Nami…it's not mom's fault."

He gently pushed Nami off him just enough to see her face. Her eyes were a little puffy and red. He slowly relayed everything he and Anissa had discussed, watched her face grow more and more confused with every word.

"I don't understand," she finally said at the end, "What could possibly be so dangerous?"
"I don't know, but…mom did have a life before Castanet. A life we know nothing about. There's probably a good reason for it…"

The two leaned against Rosie, watching the sky.

"Nami…"
"Alex?"
"Don't hate mom…"

She didn't respond.

"I love mom and dad," he said softly, still hugging her, "If I didn't love and respect dad so much, I wouldn't be here with you. Remember whose idea it was to come here in the first place…"
"I know, I know…"
"No, you don't know."

She blinked at him, surprised at the sudden sternness in his voice.

"My literal first thought when mom gave us this opportunity was 'I can finally get my sister to dad,'" Alex said, his voice rough, "Every first thought in my head regarding everything in this world defaults to you. How will this affect Nami? Will Nami be okay with this? Will this hurt her? Every question and thought regarding you is first on my brain's agenda. Every past memory I have, the most vivid bits are you. I don't even remember much about how scared I was when mom dragged us away, but I sure as Hell remember how much you were kicking and screaming all the way out the door…"

Nami was staring at him in silence, her expression illegible.

"I sacrificed a lot of time with dad for you," he continued, his fingers absentmindedly plucking blades of grass, "And you know what? I didn't mind it. I liked hanging out with mom. I liked farming. You liked hanging out with dad. You liked reading. Everything sort of worked out in its own way. But despite all that, I still had a good relationship with dad. I still respected dad. I still learned a lot from dad. Maybe not much about being a doctor, but dad taught me how to think, how to observe this world. Dad taught me lessons. Dad raised me to be a good person. And I know it worked because I'm sitting here with you right now. I know it worked because I have spent every moment in that city protecting you to the best of my ability. I have done so much, Nami."

He could feel the tears welling up again. He didn't even care anymore.

"And I just want you to know that," he whispered, "I don't need a prize. I don't need gratitude. I don't even need you to want me there. But I at least need you to fully know that I have worked myself to the bone looking after you, and I will always do so because you are my sister. Not because dad wants me to. Not because mom wants me to. Because I want to. No other reason. I want to."

He went silent, his body shaking. Nami stared for a few more moments, then slowly wrapped her arms around him and hugged him tight. For a while, they just stayed like that.

"I do know," she murmured.
"Do you really..?"
"Yes. I promise…"

They pulled apart. Both wiped away tears.

"I'm sorry if I act like I forget that," she said softly, "I'm just hurt and upset and…I don't hate mom. I really don't. But mom's just…"
"…convenient to blame," Alex finished.
"Yeah. Exactly…"

She stared at the grass.

"I don't want to blame mom. I want Papa to tell me none of this is her fault so I can finally accept it. She's just the face that comes to mind when I put an image to all of it…all the pain, all the suffering, all the times I've missed our happy family…"

She turned her gaze to the sky.

"It's like…time is invisible. You can't see it. So you need to find a way to see it. I see it when I see mom. I blame the past. I blame mom. I know I shouldn't, but it's just…how I wake up every morning, I guess."
"Because you have something to blame for all your problems?"

She shook her head and gazed at him with hurt eyes.

"It's because I have something to forgive."