Twilight – No Second Chances

Author: L

Chapter 7 – The Kiss

Disclaimer: I do not own Twilight or any of its characters.


Leah stared down at the ring with tears in her eyes, but they weren't tears of joy. Alex had shown that ring a few weeks ago; it belonged to his grandmother and she had given it to him before she died. Part of her wanted to say yes to him because she knew that Alex could make her happy but her heart stopped her brain from generating the right words. "Alex," she said quietly through her tears. "Please get up." Her heart stopped as his hopeful expression was crushed and he stood up slowly.

Entwining her hand around his, she led him across the garden and into the nearby forest, ignoring all the mutters and whispers around them. When they were far enough away from the party for them to have a private conversation without anyone eavesdropping, but near enough for him to find his way back if he never wanted to see her again, she leant against a tree and melted under his electric-blue eyes. "Alex, I'm so sorry," she cried, sniffling furiously to stop the tears from falling.

Although he was puzzled and hurt, he put on a brave smile and gently pulled her into his arms. "Leah, it's okay. It's not your fault," he murmured. "I should be the one saying sorry. Seth told me that I shouldn't propose to you because it was too fast but I didn't listen. I'm an idiot. He's your brother and he knows you better than anyone else. I should have taken his advice." Alex moved back slightly and gently wiped her tears but she pulled away from him, leaving him even more confused.

"Alex, I don't deserve any of this. I haven't been honest to you." She couldn't meet his gaze and the tears were already strangling what was left of her voice but she pushed herself to continue. "I was in love with someone when I met you. His name is Jacob and he's actually at the party right now. I've been really selfish but in the three months that I've known you, I really began to fall for you and I thought I could move on." Taking a moment to let a few more tears fall, she smiled sadly at the ground. "You made me forget about all the heartbreak I'd suffered. If I'd never come back to La Push and you had proposed to me, I would have said yes but it probably wouldn't have been right."

It was a small consolation to Alex but he tried to hold himself together. Dreading her answer but knowing that he needed to hear it, he placed both hands on Leah's shoulder and waited for her to look up. "You still love him, don't you?" he asked in a broken voice. As she nodded, Leah continued to cry, wishing that he would shout at her or be mad at her. With each understanding breath that Alex took, she hated herself even more for what she had done. "Leah, I wish you didn't but I want you to be happy." His voice was strangled. "I guess it's like in one of those movies where there's always one person who has to bow out of the love triangle. I can do that, Leah; for you, I can be that guy."

"There's more," whispered Leah regretfully. He knew what she was going to say before she could even think of the words. The guilt on her face gave it away. "I slept with him yesterday." Alex took a step back, looking more hurt than ever. Punching a tree in frustration, Leah watched with a broken heart as a tear escaped from his eyes. "I can't take it back and I'm not sure that, if I was given the opportunity, I would. I really do love him, Alex, but I just want you to know that you're the guy I want to love. I really want to be with you but I just can't seem to let him go."

"I should have known," Alex finally whispered. "I should have known. Seth told me why you moved to Vancouver. He said that there had been a guy who had hurt you really badly. We always love the people who hurt us the most." She had never seen him this upset before. He was always so happy and carefree, but it wasn't until now that she noticed the resemblance he shared with Jacob's youthful self. "I guess I should go," he mumbled quietly.

Leah reached out to grab his arm and sobbed, "Alex, I don't expect you to forgive me but you need to know how much I care about you." Choking back the tears, he refused to look at her. "You deserve a girl who really knows how to appreciate you. I'm not that girl." Hearing the pain in her voice, he tried to suppress his own and wrapped his arms around her. "Why are you being so nice to me?" she whispered into his chest. "You should have just left me sitting here on the forest floor crying. I can't believe I'm doing this to you. I can't believe I'm actually letting you go."

"It's the right thing to do," he murmured, stroking her hair softly. "If I'm not the guy for you, you're never going to be happy with me, and that's all I want. I don't doubt the fact that you care about me because I know that if you didn't, you wouldn't have been able to put up with me for the past three months." Alex laughed softly as he pressed his lips tenderly against her hair. "Sometimes I really hate myself for being the good guy," he sighed. His voice was thick with emotion. "I really hope that he can make you happy, Leah, because you deserve it after everything that has happened. Don't feel bad; it's not your fault. If you don't love me, there's nothing you can do to change that. If I thought that I stood a chance, I would definitely fight for you but I know that I don't."

As he started to loosen his grip, Leah pulled him closer to her and sobbed, "Please don't go; not yet. I just want to hold onto you for a few more seconds." It was what he wanted as well and he couldn't stop himself from hugging her even more tightly. A minute passed by and he knew he had to let go but as he moved away, their eyes locked and he moved his hands up to cup her face tenderly. Alex held his breath unconsciously as he battled with his feelings, eventually choosing to lean in for a kiss – a goodbye kiss. He could feel her tears mixing with his own and while neither of them wanted the kiss to end, he knew that he had to be the one to do it.

"Goodbye Leah," he whispered, pressing his lips against her forehead for one last time. He stepped back and stared at her for a long second, capturing her beauty with his memory, before making his way through the forest. Leah collapsed onto the ground in devastation and leant against the trunk of a tree, pulling her knees close to her chest and wrapping her arms around them. Sobbing silently, she watched his retreating back and let the tears drown her.