It has been a while, hasn't it? Well, to make up for it, here is a two-chapter update. Whoo!
You are all going to hate me. Ah, well. Hopefully, by the end of these stories, your senses of sad will be null-ed down into nothingness.
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Life One,
Chapter 7
The ronin was aware of dreaming. It was what his Lady did, to communicate with him. It was how she had found him before, tired and dead inside, and brought him to life. It is how she kept even him hoping after Adel's trap.
It was also how he got his missions. She stood before him, nothing more, and nothing less than herself. He didn't even have to vision her- he knew. Her voice was already being thought, her words were already known. His responses were heard just as easily.
"He is back in your arms," came her amused voice. Ultimacia-sama may have been as powerful as Adel, but she was not as violent. She was patient. "You are unusually content."
"What is your command, milady?" Completely down to business, just as he should be. Seifer was a good servant, even if he did have a few quirks.
She paused. "I was not expecting him to accompany her. Since it is more than obvious you cannot kill him, I want you to bring him back to me." She opened Seifer's eyes, staring at the sleeping blonde and closing his eyes again.
"Will he be useful to you?" Seifer had no doubt in his mind about his Lady's good intentions.
"Who knows? It's better to have him by your side than it is for you to face him," she pointed out, not even bothering to mention his failure. "The lady Rinoa still wishes to go to Squall?"
"She will spy for you, I think. I have yet to convince her that this will save his life. She deeply cares for the unemotional brat."
Ultimacia was about to speak again, but she simply left, leaving traces of the meeting in his mind. Seifer opened his own eyes, not upset that she had left him. She had more pressing matters; she was going after Adel. She was going to get him to name her his successor, and gain all of his powers.
Seifer was just happy that it meant that he would get to keep Zell. Zell would have nowhere to return to, no one to be afraid of. Seifer could keep him close.
The ex-monk stirred, opening his eyes. There was adoration in Seifer's own, but Zell killed it promptly.
"How is Rinoa-sama?" he asked, and Seifer turned over to look at another sleeping form.
"Still sleeping," he replied. "The sun's not even up yet."
"Hmm," Zell agreed, not moving.
"Zell?" Seifer murmured, and Zell turned his head. Seifer moved back to where he had been, holding him. He made no move to loosen up. And then he kissed Zell's tattoo gently.
Zell sighed, staring at him. "You understand that I'm Adel's, right?"
Seifer made a morning angry face and held Zell tighter. "You're mine. I won't let you go away again." Seifer winced as Zell said nothing, maybe remembering last night's request that Seifer wouldn't hear of. "Zell?" he asked.
The ex-monk did not respond. When Seifer looked over, his face had a peaceful expression. Relieved Zell had just fallen asleep, the ronin closed his eyes, trying to match their breaths. What gave Zell away, though, was when he touched Seifer's hand gently.
"I wish I could be yours," he uttered.
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The continuation of the journey was as expected, if not slightly frosty. Despite Rinoa's best attempts (everything from pretending to be injured to pushing Seifer on top of Zell) the two were still having awkward moments that they knew they couldn't be having. Two nights in they stopped at another hotel and she moved to the baths to give them "privacy."
So, in male fashion, the two got down to business. Seifer was polishing and sharpening his katana while Zell was meditating over in a corner. Though they might have been married, or though they might have been in one another's company and though they might have been able to forgive almost execution (which Seifer didn't buy completely), there was still the awkward fact in the air that Adel was still hanging over their heads all the time. What if Adel got to them? Would he kill them? Would he kill one or the other?
Not a word passed between them until a voice spoke from behind the curtain. "Zell-sama," it croaked.
Zell looked up to see the figure of Odine, Adel's creepy advisor. Seifer was already reacting with his sword in hand, and Odine fell to his knees. "Please, Zell-sama, I mean you no harm!"
"Sama?" Seifer echoed, and Zell stood, touching Seifer's shoulder gently. Seifer relaxed about an inch. Trying not to pee himself, Odine bowed lower, exposing his neck.
"Adel takes me seriously. I have status, being what I am to him." He turned to Odine. "What is it? Why have you come here?"
"Adel has been captured," Odine told him. "Ultimacia has captured him. I managed to get away." He bowed his head. "I am in your serivice."
Seifer looked up to see Zell's reaction, but rather than relief, Zell's face showed shock. How could Zell be upset? This only helped him. This brought the two of them closer.
Maybe… maybe they weren't as close as he thought. He did try to kill Zell, after all.
It was obvious the ex-monk was not prepared for this and he slid to the ground in shock. "He…he couldn't…"
"I'm afraid so. I managed to escape and he yelled at me to get you to safety. You are not safe, Zell-sama." Odine's head hit the tatami mat with a thud. Seifer thought maybe he should have hit harder.
"Sure he is," Seifer said rather rudely. "I'm going to protect him."
Odine looked at him. "From what? You are Ultimacia's henchmen, are you not? You reek of her." Odine laughed. "She'd have you kill him. He is precious to Adel. She would ransom him."
"So why are you talking to me about this?" Seifer stood. He drew his sword, staring at Odine and he took a look at Zell.
Pitiful. Zell was on all fours, his eyes tearing up and his arms trembling under his weight. "Adel's in trouble," Zell whimpered. "I have to help him." Somehow his thoughts were twisted. Adel was the only one who'd ever shown signs of caring for him, Adel was the only one who'd actually tried to save him. Seifer didn't… Seifer didn't…
Seifer had his arms wrapped around his monk. "If you want to run, I'll let you," Seifer whispered in his ear. "You can run from me, but don't run back to him. Please."
Zell pulled away, suddenly unsure. He did have to find Adel. Otherwise, Adel would be angry. That was his sole mission- to care for Adel like a concubine should. He would follow that mission proudly.
Seifer didn't fight when Zell followed Odine out the door. Zell needed to clear his head, right? No matter how long that took.
Even if it took forever.
He sent a congratulations to his mistress and Rinoa returned, rather disappointed at the two. "Where's Zell-kun?" she asked.
"Gone." Seifer started to put away his things.
"You can't loose him!" Rinoa stated angrily. "You should chase after him! He won't come back to you otherwise! Don't let the other win!"
Then Rinoa promptly said good-night, and Seifer lay in bed for the longest time. He could see the moon through the cracks in the wall, and he could feel the wind come and play on his skin.
Maybe it was wishful thinking, but he knew he couldn't control Zell. He didn't have that right. Zell was an adult. Zell could think clearly. Maybe.
It did feel wrong. It did feel like he was leaving Zell behind, it did feel like part of him was dying. But it… this… was for the best. He in no way deserved Zell. And yet Zell had shown him such compassion- still Zell loved him.
Seifer sighed, closing his eyes.
"No futon for me, ronin?" came the voice, and Seifer sat up, eyes blinking. The motion was completely pointless; Zell pushed him back down again. "Seifer," he whispered darkly planting kisses along the ronin's body. They were dark. They were desperate. These kisses were not like Zell.
Seifer realized Zell was trembling, his hands wet. "Baby monk?" he asked, and Zell pulled away suddenly, his body threatening to go into seizures. Seifer instantly got up and moved to place Zell in the futon but Zell grabbed his yukata instead.
"I can't wash it off," Zell whimpered. "It won't come off."
"What won't?" Seifer asked, and when Zell's eyes turned to him, hurt and dark and afraid, he knew. Seifer embraced him, holding him tightly. It was always hard after this. Anyone was scarred from it.
Zell trembled, clutching at Seifer, as if Seifer was some sort of gate of heaven that he needed to see, as if Seifer was the brightest light in the world. Still murmuring nonsense, the ex-monk rocked the two of them back and forth in the dark. Seifer leaned over to his ear.
"You've not killed before?" he asked, then realized of course not. Zell had lived in a monastery, or he was a slave-boy. He'd seen death, not dealt it.
"He kept saying things," Zell said brokenly, trying not to sob. "He kept saying things that weren't true at all! And I… I…"
"Don't speak," Seifer comforted him. "Shhh. You're okay now, Zell. It's okay." He held on tighter, and Zell buried his face in Seifer's chest, trying not to cry. He felt weak. He felt pathetic for doing this, for letting Seifer see him like this. Yet he couldn't care less at the moment.
"He's not," Zell cried. "He's not."
"He's sleeping for a bit," Seifer told him gently, trying to ease this shock. Seifer himself could remember the first life he took- trying not to become involved. The man had just kneeled over with the sword still inside him, blood everywhere. His eyes had died, and Seifer had felt a rush of guilt, and a rush of exhilaration. How was he supposed to feel? He'd kept killing, distancing himself from his missions.
Until Zell had showed up.
"Make it go away," Zell pleaded, crying into his yukata. "Make it go away."
Seifer didn't know what else to do, so he lay Zell down softly. Kissing his neck, kissing away his tears. Zell responded, and Seifer distracted him the entire night.
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They did not see Rinoa's eyes, for if they had they would have seen Ultimacia as she glared at the monk's back. A successor to the power. Marked by a dragon, marked by blood.
Typical of a dragon to use. She did not dare interrupt- the boy was now a dragon, and had power he was not aware of yet- better to bring him back into her castle. Better to keep Seifer unaware of what she had planned for his other.
Rinoa, of course, was just going to have to keep silent until meeting Squall.
When Ultimacia finally did meet the monk face to face, she killed him. It was quick and painless for him. She expected Seifer to fall to his knees; she expected Seifer to cry.
She did not expect Seifer's rage to come after her. She did not expect him to draw his blade, she did not expect it to meet her neck.
She did not expect to die.
She had expected, as she watched from the afterlife, for Seifer to take his own life in shame of never protecting Zell's.
