Chapter 7 - When life defies you, I'll be the soul, you'll never go astray
(Verse from the song "Make you mine")
Kahlan was not mad.
She was furious.
Who did those two think they were, to talk about her, Kahlan Amnell Mother Confessor, Queen of Aydindril, the highest authority of the Midlands, that way? They spoke like she was transparent and deaf. She was so astonished that she remained gaping and attended dumb to all their silly spat.
Richard was talking about her like she was a porcelain doll, too fragile and precious to be even touched. Did he forget that she had lived and fought for her life since long before meeting him? That she was perfectly capable of taking care of herself, just like she had done so far? That she was the one meant to protect him and not vice versa? This tendency he had, to be over protective was turning unnerving and she had to tell him one thing or two about it.
But more than Richard, Cara was the one who made her infuriated. When Richard ordered the Mord-Sith to stay with Kahlan, the former reacted with pure disgust: it seemed that the mere idea to spend time with the Confessor horrified the blonde and filled her with contempt. Cara was literally offended and reacted attacking Richard with such vehemence, that the man was taken aback.
Kahlan wasn't bothered by the fact that Cara preferred to be on Richard's side. It was easy to understand that the Mord-Sith wished to protect her Lord above all. But the disdain she showed toward the Confessor was honestly unfair and unacceptable.
Cara was, matter of factly, holding something against Kahlan, who didn't know which price she'd be willing to pay to know what was passing through that mule head. What the brunette was no longer willing to endure, was to be walked over the blonde like that. She tried to talk to Cara, to be kind at her, tried to give her space and time, to be patient and comprehensive, but none of this attempts achieved any result and now the Confessor was really sick of all this absurd avoiding her and pretending that she didn't exist from Cara. Kahlan had been sure that they had long since overtaken their conflicts; she thought they were friends, but evidently she was wrong.
If Cara wanted to keep on playing this fool game, it worked fine! Kahlan was going to repay her with the same coin of indifference. And if Cara didn't want the brunette on her way, well there was no problem, from now on they could mutually ignore each other.
But even if she was doing her best to convince herself that this was the right thing to do, Kahlan couldn't help but keep on feeling a bitter clutch on her guts and a deep lump on her throat, every time she laid her eyes on Cara.
That stupid, idiot, hard-hearted Cara.
That morning Zedd woke up and found his three companions already awake and busy on lonely tasks. Richard was sharpening his sword, Kahlan was gathering the bedrolls while Cara was some paces away picking some berries for breakfast. All of them had the longest faces the Wizard had ever seen on their features. He was himself a little disturbed by the quickness with which Richard had discarded his helping offer the previous night, to turn to the one Cara placed him.
The Mord-Sith convinced Richard dragging out all his insecurity with such confidence that - hadn't Zedd seen her all the time at least thirty paces away from them – he could almost suspect that she heard the speech he had with his grandson the morning before. Anyway Richard was now firm on his decision and arguing further with him was pointless. But Zedd was planning to stop in Aydindril for some time and then reach the People's Palace to reinforce the Seeker's ranks. If Cara wanted to temper Richard's goodness, then Zedd would try to temper the Mord-Sith's roughness.
Therefore the Wizard was guessing the reason for Richard's upset, but didn't instead understand why the women seemed so stiff and sulky at each other.
When Cara returned with some fruits in her hands, Kahlan didn't even lift her eyes and spoke any word; the same with the red-clad woman. This was quite usual from the taciturn Mord-Sith, but really unlikely from the gentle and constantly smiling Confessor. Zedd thought that he should say a word about this to Richard, but also the brown haired man himself looked few inclined to get involved in intricate female matters. He had enough to ponder about his own business, so Zedd decided to drop the subject at the moment.
They ate the fruits in complete silence and packed all their belongings.
"I'm going to fill the water skins." Cara uttered, addressing to no one in particular and walking away.
Richard was checking the map to choose the route, but after some minutes he raised his head, realizing that Cara wasn't still returning and nothing announced her coming back.
"Kahlan stay here with Zedd. I'll come back with Cara." And he began to lift.
Kahlan felt that Richard was acting again over courteous, and decided not to submit herself to this silly treatment, so she halted him placing a hand on his shoulder and answering flatly:
"No Richard, stay here and go on with the map. I'll find Cara."
The moment after she blamed her impulsiveness and bit her tongue, but now it was late and she had no wish to explain the men, why she was not all that eager to be alone with Cara.
.
The brunette walked for a couple of minutes then saw Cara in the distance, standing still on her back at the edge of the stream with water skins already filled in her hands, arms dangling on her sides. Her shoulders were sagged and her head dropped on her chest. To Kahlan she looked completely forlorn and her grudge turned into sad compassion in the blink of an eye. The Mother Confessor wasn't meant to be a rancorous person after all.
She felt the urge to see Cara's beautiful sea-green eyes to make sure that she was okay, to establish a connection with her and have confirmation that it was not too late to return close to each other. Kahlan wanted help the blonde to untie whatever knot was hidden inside her. She couldn't say if such need was for Cara's sake or for her own.
"Cara." She called while walking toward her and hastening her pace to reach her, the pressure to get in touch with her increasing.
The blonde began to turn around to face Kahlan, who was impatient to meet those elusive eyes, which the Confessor now realized she had missed so much in the past days. They were nothing but five paces away from each other and only a light curtain of blonde hair were preventing the brunette from diving into her friend's eyes, but suddenly she felt a prickling running all over her back and bringing goose bumps at the base of her neck. Hackle raised and an icy shiver coursed down her spine.
Then everything got blinded.
White.
All around her a wet thick white curtain dropped and Kahlan could see anything else farther than her nose.
"Cara." She cried again, this time a hint of concern was in her voice. No reply came in return.
She moved some steps forward, where the Mord-Sith was supposed to be and began fumbling her arms trying to touch something, but nothing was there to be touched.
"CARA!" She yelled for the third time and now angst was clearly audible in her tone, but also this time the complete silence was the only answer. Kahlan was now panic-stricken, sweat was trickling from her forehead and rumbling beats were echoing in her chest.
She turned on every side to catch even the glimpse of something around, but the only thing to be seen was that damn white fog. She stopped inhaling deeply and closing her eyes to clear her mind, while she struggled to focus on the situation. She tried to hear the noises around her but there was no sound at all…
The stream was a few paces from her, but the water wasn't gurgling; birds were chirping just few moments ago and now there was none to be heard. This fog was likely magical and prevented sight and heard, Khalan thought. Maybe Cara was closer to her than she was expecting, but she could not see or hear her.
With her eyes still shut, Kahlan tried to sniff the air in the attempt to get any scent around her, hoping that at least the smell was granted. She deeply inhaled and tried to concentrate: beyond the wetness of the fog she sensed… underbrush, damped leaves... something like juniper… or maybe rosemary… and a light leather essence!
She opened wide her eyes and perceived the slightest pink blur in front of her.
The Confessor threw a hand toward this color and grabbed something. She recognized the fabric under her fingers: leather! She grasped more firmly, feeling that the leathers were moving to wrench her hand away and pulled with all of her strength toward herself, until she had an unconcealed Cara finally stumbling onto her.
"Cara it's me, Kahlan!" She shouted grabbing Cara by her shoulders and shaking her. Planting her eyes in the blonde's and expecting to relieve her and to be soothed herself after being reunited. But Cara wasn't relieved at all: her features were freaked out and those beautiful eyes Kahlan was so eager to see, were widened in shock.
"Cara what's wrong? Are you hurt?" The brunette screamed pulling Cara closer to her and squeezing her more tightly, as if loosening her grip on the blonde would make her disappear in the mist and never let her be found again. Cara was still gaping soundlessly.
"Cara you're worrying me, answer me please!" The Mord-Sith seemed at last to come back to reality and returned the same upset look Kahlan was addressing to her. Then she hesitantly stuttered:
"K-Kahlan… my Agiels…"
"What?"
"My Agiels aren't working any longer… Richard… he must be dead!"
