Ron ½ Book 2: Middleton Mayhem
By Parareru

Disclaimer: Kim Possible is owned by the Disney Corporation. –So let's see some season DVD sets already! Or put some more KP out on iTunes! And what's with jacking the price up!—

Ranma ½ is owned by Rumiko Takahashi and distributed by Viz.

This is a continuation of Ron ½. Please read that first, otherwise you may end up being hopelessly lost. Tsk, tsk. You just had to believe Ryoga when he said he knew how to get you home.

Chapter 6: Second Best? - part 1

Kim panted heavily as she glared at her opponent through narrowed eyes and wobbled slightly on her feet. In the last exchange she had taken a blow to the head that had tagged her pretty good and left her feeling more than a little woozy. Her opponent had proven to be unexpectedly competent, far more so than usual. She had already been forced to revise her estimation of his abilities upwards several times. He was good, she was willing to admit that, but Kim knew that she was better.

She circled around slowly trying to make it seem like she was stalling for time in orderto regain her breath and balance and lashed out with a quick feint at his knee with her leading foot. True to form, he fell for the ruse and attempted to block or catch her foot, leaving a hole in his guard that Kim was quick to exploit. Instead of striking his knee, her lead foot planted itself on the ground inside his guard and she surged forward in a flash to drive a lightning fast knee to his gut. The breath whooshed from her opponent's lungs as he staggered back a good half dozen steps, holding his injured midsection. This time it was he who was forced to go on the defensive and evade Kim until he could get a chance to strike back.

Kim didn't intend to give him that chance. She pressed forward her advantage, hounding her opponent and giving him no respite, no time to recovery. Everywhere he turned, there she was and everywhere he struck, there she wasn't. Her hands flicked out like a hundred striking serpents, but to her amazement and annoyance very few of her blows managed to reach their intended target. Her strikes were evaded, her blows parried and gently diverted and the few hits that she did manage to land were weathered as if they were of no more consequence than a passing rain shower.

Kim narrowed her eyes at that. Well, if he thought that he was dealing with a simple little rain squall, then she'd just have to show him what she really was. A hurricane.

Leaping into the air, Kim snapped off a spin kick that had it connected would have come pretty damn close to taking his head clean off his shoulders. But the attack wasn't meant to connect and as she expected, he ducked under her scything leg and she aborted her spin a fraction of a second early to land in a slight crouch right in front of him. She flashed him a quick grin to tell him that he had just made the mistake that would end the fight in her favor as her hands reached out for his shoulders and she let gravity and momentum aid her in rolling onto her back, dragging his startled face down with her. Once off her feet she raised her legs, planted her soles squarely in his stomach and when her shoulder blades hit the ground she simultaneously kicked out and released her grip on his shoulders.

However, instead of the panicked look that she had expected to see plastered across his face she saw a look of confident determination. As soon as Kim's built up momentum separated the two of them he twisted his body in midair, threw one arm down to drag along the ground, arresting his impromptu flight and the other... The other arm snaked forward to clamp a hand around her ankle with surprising strength and Kim suddenly found herself being treated to a demonstration of the laws of physics. For the arm that had served as a brake had bled off some, but not all of the forward motion that she had bestowed upon her opponent's body and that energy had to find another outlet. Namely herself.

Kim was unable to suppress an involuntary yelp of surprise as she was dragged forward by her captured leg. The world disappeared in a disorienting blur as she was swung around in a wide arc. Kim lost count of the number of revolutions she passed through as her opponent somehow managed to surge to his feet and finally released her in a long headlong flight.

The world snapped back into abrupt focus and Kim noted with only a slight tinge of alarm that she was rushing straight for a very large, very solid tree. Her lips curled up into a smile. Perfect. Exactly what she needed.

Twisting and tucking her body into a ball, Kim reoriented herself so that her feet rather than her head came to land on the bole of the conveniently placed tree. Using the tree as a springboard, she leaped out at full extension, ricocheting quickly off the ground and rocketed up at him from an oblique angle from where she drove her left elbow into his gut with a strike that she knew he had to have felt since it managed to drive the air from his lungs. Taking advantage of his momentary lapse of concentration, Kim coiled back and unleashed a right cross that would send her opponent spinning all the way to the ground.

But somehow at the very last moment he managed to lean away from the strike and Kim felt a numbing blow to her shoulder as her extended wrist was seized in a vise-like grip. Before she had time to react, her arm was twisted painfully up behind her back and the momentum that had been previously channeled into her punch was now being used to guide her straight to the ground. Kim kicked and thrashed about futilely, but in the end had to concede defeat to the hands and body that held her firmly against the earth.

"Alright, Ron. You win," she growled with her face pressed to the sandy soil and abruptly the pressured eased. Quickly, Kim levered herself up into a sitting position and rubbed at her aching shoulder as Ron indulged in a bit of self congratulation.

"Booyah! Ron-dog in the hizzouse!" Ron crowed as he pumped his arms in celebration and as a stunned Kim watched Ron caper about in obscene glee she found herself forced to wonder how this could have happened.

XXXXX

-Earlier-

"Ron!" Yori and Lo Shin both exclaimed in horror upon catching sight of Ron's battered condition as he entered the front door of his house partially supported by Kim. Both of the girls leveled a suspicious look at Kim, silently wondering whether the red-haired heroine had been responsible somehow. Kim coolly returned their questioning gazes with an unflinching look of her own.

"You're injured," Lo Shin said as she took Ron's free arm and attempted to guide him up the stairs to his room.

"Yes, you need to rest," Yori chimed in as she gauged the extent of Ron's injuries with a practiced eye. "How did this happen?"

"Don't want to talk about it," Ron answered tightly with a strange look in his eye. He shrugged out of Kim and Lo Shin's arms and gave them an apologetic look. "Sorry, but I've got something I need to do."

He wobbled slightly on his feet as he made his way though the house, pausing only slightly in the kitchen to pick up a box of matches and determinedly marched out into the backyard, ignoring the girls' continuous entreaties to rest. He didn't stop until he reached the old charcoal grill that was his father's domain and with a barely suppressed shudder he tossed Perfume's hastily written Chinese romance story on top of the grates.

Ron didn't care that he could not read a single word of Chinese. One set of squiggles looked like any other to him. The fact that the story, a romance story no less, existed, starring him and Perfume sent shudders running up and down his spine. Snatching up the half full can of lighter fluid he liberally doused the pages and without a hint of hesitation set them ablaze. Perfume let out a mildly disappointed sound at that act, but she was willing to accept that Ron wanted no reminders of his rather grueling day.

Once the flames had committed the Chinese love story eternally to ashes, Ron squared his shoulders and stared off into the darkness in the direction of his stolen tree house. He nodded his head as if only just reaching a decision and resolutely marched off to confront the source of all his woes.

"Chin Kang! Get out here!" Ron bellowed in the most authoritative voice he could muster. He stood there waiting for a few seconds until it became apparent that Chin Kang had no intention of obey his command. "Fine! If you're not going to come out..." he growled sourly as he began to climb the rickety wooden slats nailed to the tree trunk that served as a ladder.

"Go 'way," Chin Kang snarled as his face popped into the opening and blew a handful of what appeared to be dust into Ron's face. As the blonde coughed and waved his hands reflexively in front of his face while Chin Kang used the opening to douse Ron with a bucket of cold water.

"What the hell?" Ron-chan coughed and spluttered moments before she lost she grip on the wooden slats and fell to the ground. She tried to struggle to her feet, but then looked in surprise at her body at the unexpected sounds of rustling and popping. She frantically tried to brush away the strange growths that were forming on her clothes and the last sound she heard before unconsciousness claimed her once again was a soul rending shriek.

Kim staggered at the piercing scream, blinking stars from her sight. Once her vision cleared she stared in surprise at Ron's unconscious body lying at the foot of the tree and she could swear that the vaguely man shaped roots that were so liberally spread across Ron's upper body were growing. Stunned, she looked up at the tree house where Chin Kang glared down at the three of them like an overgrown feral cat. "Did he just use hyperactive acid on Ron?"

"No, just ordinary water and shrieking mandrake seeds," Perfume grunted matter-of-factly as if it were an everyday occurrence. "Don't touch anything yet," she warned Kim before she hopped beneath the open trap door and barked a command in Chinese. Sullenly, Chin Kang retreated from the opening and Perfume quickly hopped up into the structure. From inside the tree house came the sound of Perfume's voice barking more orders in Chinese. There were a few sounds that may have been Chin Kang protesting, but those were quickly cut off by Perfume's sharp voice.

A few moments later she bounded down from the tree house with several bottles and a large bowl in hand. After setting the implements down she plugged Ron's ears and her own with pairs of ear plugs. "Place your fingers in your ears," she told Kim, Yori and Lo Shin in a tone that brooked no argument.

The instant that the girls complied with the order, Perfume bent to the task of pulling the roots that dotted across Ron's upperbody. Each pulled root let out a piercing scream as it was yanked off. Kim staggered slightly as each shriek managed to partially slip past her fingers. Finally, when all of the horrid roots had been peeled from Ron, Perfume began tossing ingredients into the bowl which promptly began to hiss and foam evilly. Kim winced and drew her head away from the acrid fumes that wafted from the bowl.

After a few seconds the reaction subsided and Perfume began pouring it into Ron-chan's mouth. Kim noted that the potion must have tasted as foul as it had smelled for Ron promptly began to cough and spat some of the medicine out.

"Don't do that," Perfume admonished as she poured still more of the brackish potion down Ron-chan's throat despite her feeble protests. "You have to drink it all."

Ron-chan coughed again, but managed to swallow the potion this time. "Wha?" she asked weakly as she bleerily opened her eyes.

"It looks like you're going to rest whether you want to or not," Perfume chuckled as she motioned for Yori and Lo Shin to take Ron back into the house.

"Is Ron going to be okay?" Kim asked as she brushed a stray wisp of hair from her forehead.

Perfume snorted. "Chin Kang has a remarkably well stocked supply. The boy will be fine." The Amazon matriarch looked pensively at the treehouse, the source of the recent troubles.

"Kim, I want you to help train Ron," Perfume said slowly as the two of them left Ron to recover in peace.

"You want me to what? Kim asked incredulously, not willing to believe what she had just heard.

"I want you to help train Ron," Perfume repeated in that same utterly unflappable voice as if she had not just made the absurdest of requests.

"Are you kidding me?" Kim blurted out. "I can't train Ron in magic! I don't know any magic!" She cut herself off before she added that she didn't believe in magic. Even after all of the patently impossible things that had happened to her and Ron could she really say that she didn't believe in magic?

Perfume held up a hand to forestall any further argument on Kim's part. "Did you hear me say anything about magic?" she asked with a raised eyebrow.

Kim subsided slightly as she reviewed their conversation in her head. "Well, no," she admitted.

Perfume nodded. "Ron's progress in magic is proceeding at an acceptable pace, but he needs something more. There is a very real link between body and mind. A balance if you will. I shall continue training Ron in magic. What I want from you is to train Ron's body."

"You want me to what?" Kim repeated, even more shocked than she had been only moments before. A rosy blush formed on her cheeks as she wondered what exactly Perfume had meant by her request.

Perfume tsked lightly. "Not even close to what I meant. What I want is for you help train Ron to fight."

Ron in a fight. Kim sighed in relief. That was marginally better, but even so she still had trouble wrapping her mind around the concept. Somehow that just didn't seem to make sense.

Sure, there had been that fight with Lo Shin's brother Mousse in Nerima and then there had been her own fight with Ron at Yamanochi, but she just couldn't see Ron as a serious fighter. The first fight he'd won with a couple of flashy moves that he'd somehow learned from Ranma. In their mountaintop battle at Yamanochi Ron had won because of a simple fluke rather than any real skill. If it ever came down to two of them in a real standup fight, Kim would have definitely laid odds on herself.

"It would just be some light sparring," Perfume explained. "Just to keep the boy's body in shape while we move onto the other Arts."

Kim tried valiantly to come up with some sort of an excuse. "But I -"

"Of course, if you're unwilling, I suppose I could always ask Yori or Lo Shin for their assistance," Perfume interrupted and Kim's objections died unspoken as a dissatisfied scowl formed on her face.

An involuntary growl escaped from Kim's throat as she could just picture what would happen in her mind's eye. Yori or Lo Shin, which one didn't matter, the two were practically interchangeable for all Kim cared, training and sparring with Ron. Both of them hot and sweaty from the workout and then sparring some more when she suddenly slips and lands on top of Ron. The two share a quiet laugh, their eyes meet and they inch closer and closer until...

"Fine, I'll do it," Kim snapped as she shook her head clear of the disturbing images. Just why Kim found them to be so disturbing she was unwilling to dwell on at the moment.

"Excellent. We will begin at dawn tomorrow," Perfume informed her with a pleased grin and then hopped away on her staff.

Kim began to have her doubts at that point.

XXXXX

"Ronald, do you have any idea what time it is?" James Possible growled ominously as he opened the door and caught sight of his daughter's best friend standing there somewhat sheepishly. He briefly entertained a fantasy of stuffing the boy into a rocket and launching it towards Pluto for a year long survey to definitively determine its planetary status. No black holes. Black holes were reserved for that blight on his little Kimmie-cub's life known as boys. For example, that one boy she'd called a "hottie" and "golden" came to mind. Ronald had gotten that very same speech that night of the Middleton Days Parade, but fortunately for his peace of mind, that hadn't lasted.

"Sorry, Mr. Dr. P," Ron wheezed as he abruptly doubled over and valiantly tried to catch his breath. "Believe me, it wasn't my idea." Perfume had started his lesson extra early this morning and just as the sun was about to make its daily appearance over the horizon his teacher had set him off on a high speed jog towards Kim's house.

"Sunday morning. My day to sleep in. No 'honey do' lists," Mr. Dr. P grumbled disconsolately as he shambled back up the stairs to his bedroom. "Doesn't that boy have a home of his own? What's the point of having one if he spends the rest of his time here?"

Watching Kim's father trudge up the stairs Ron had a sinking feeling that this day was not going to go well for him. "I don't think he was very happy to see us," Ron commented.

Perfume merely shrugged, not looking put out in the least despite having shepherded Ron through his grueling run. "Go collect Kim while I check the yard. I thought I spotted a suitable training area in the back."

"Yeah, that's where Kim practices sometimes."

"Then it should be adequate for our use," she said as she chose instead to accompany Ron to gather Kim.

Ron pursed his lips thoughtfully as he trudged up the stairs and turned in the direction of Kim's loft. "Are you sure about this?" he asked plaintively. "I mean Kim is a much better fighter than I am and I'm not so sure I want to add any more bruises to my collection here."

"Mind and Body, Yin and Yang. Both halves need to be in balance if we are to proceed," Perfume lectured.

"But does it have to be so early?" Ron whined. "I mean, if you thought you saw tweaked waking Mr. Dr. P up, we've only touched the tip of the iceberg."

"I have my means," Perfume replied serenely.

"Yeah, that's what worries me," Ron muttered under his breath as the two of them reached the door to Kim's room. He decided to try one last time to make the ancient Amazon see reason. "Look, will you at least let me wake Kim up?"

Perfume studied him for a moment before nodding her assent. "Very well, you may go first."

Twitching at what had sounded vaguely like a threat Ron ascended the stairs to Kim's private sanctum. "Yo, KP. You decent?" he called up the stairs to announce his presence, but softly enough so that he didn't disturb the rest of the Possible household.

Hearing no response from Kim, Ron peeked over the top of the steps to find her snuggled peacefully under her comforter. He gently tiptoed over to her bedside and gave her shoulder a tentative shake. "KP, time to get up," he said softly.

"Not yet," Kim mumbled sleepily as she shifted position. "No freak fighting on Sundays. Wade'll call."

"It's sparring time with Ron," Ron said softly as he crouched beside Kim's bed.

He was barely able to suppress a yelp of surprise as Kim rolled in the direction of his voice and wrapped an arm around Ron's neck, pulling him close. "Best two falls out of three?" she murmured drowsily, a hint of a smile on her face.

"Well, let's take this outside," Ron suggested as he tried to slip Kim's arm off his neck. "I definitely don't want your Dad to find us like this."

"Daddy's gonna send you to a black hole, Ronnie," Kim giggled in the thrall of her dream as her lips turned furtherupwards in a teasing smile.

Ron's eyes widened at Kim's dreamy comment and he had to wonder what vision was currently passing through her head that would warrant a trip to a black hole courtesy of Mr. Dr. P. "Um, let's not think about that right now," he said softly as he quickly extricated himself from Kim's embrace and she responded to the lack of his presence in her arms with a pout and a fitful whimper.

"S'not fair. Where's my Ron-shine?" he heard Kim mutter and he had to forcibly restrain himself from reiterating his point about gross misuse.

Quickly, Ron retreated back down the stairs to where Perfume was still waiting. "KP's having a good dream right now. Any chance that we could do this in say a couple of hours?"

"Nonsense. Why waste perfectly good daylight," Perfume replied loftily and bounced up the stairs that Ron had just exited. "I'll go wake her up."

"You might not want to do that," Ron warned as he followed the lead of his Mystical Arts instructor. "Kim can be cranky when she first wakes up."

Perfume did not deign to answer Ron's comment with one of her own as she grabbed one corner of Kim's comforter and sent it across the room, leaving Kim wrapped only in the bedsheets. With another quick motion the bedsheets were also pulled off of Kim's slumbering form.

"Wake up! Wake up!" Perfume barked in a commanding voice that came very close to rivaling that of Mr. Barkin's, but Kim barely stirred, eliciting a grunt of surprise from the Amazon. "This girl can really sleep."

"Yeah, you do sorta learn to tune out the noises when you catch a few winks on a cargo plane every now and again," Ron hazarded as Kim shivered from the draft that had appeared in the absence of her bed covers.

"Hmm, this appears to call for extreme measures," Perfume mumbled thoughtfully to herself as she bounced down the stairs before Ron could utter one word to stop her.

"Um, KP, you really want to get up now," Ron warned as Kim curled up in a fetal position to retain some vestige of warmth in the absence of her covers.

"Be with you in a minute," Kim yawned, a little furthera long the path to consciousness as she snuggled closer to her pillow and Pandaroo.

"No, I mean now, Kim," Ron said desperately as he cast a look down the stairs to Perfume returning with a bucket in hand. "I mean, you really, really want to wake up now."

"You gave her fair warning," Perfume said gravely as she hefted the bucket of water. "My turn now."

"Perfume?" Kim mumbled as her eyes finally opened to the dim illumination provided by the rising sun. That last bit had sounded vaguely menacing.

"Uh oh, too late," Ron groaned as Kim began uncurling her body from around her pillow in the first acts of waking up just as Perfume heaved the bucket and its contents.

"AIIIEEEE!" Kim shrieked, instantly brought to an extreme edge by the bucketful of cold water that sloshed over her. She bounded to her feet, eyes blazing with fury as she searched her room for the assailant. Her eyes of verdant fire fell upon the bucket rattling to a stop by Ron's feet as the tip of a familiar wooden staff disappeared down the stairs.

Her fury mounting by leaps and bounds, Kim locked her eyes on Ron, demanding either explanation or retribution, but willing to settle for either.

"Not me. KP! Perfume!" he squeaked quickly and pointed a finger down the stairs before Kim could move or say a word.

Kim's eyebrow twitched. "Why?" she demanded flatly, still in her attack stance, ready at a moment's notice to rend Ron limb from limb if he didn't explain to her satisfaction.

"I tried to wake you up gently, but you kept mumbling in your sleep and you still wouldn't wake up, so Perfume took over and woke you up with a bucket of water," Ron fired off rapidly in explanation.

So that had been Perfume's staff disappearing from view only moments ago.

"Ron! Why didn't you stop her?" Kim demanded crossly as she dropped from her fighting stance and shivered in her sodden pajamas. She didn't know how it was possible, but it felt like the water Perfume used to wake Kim up had been a scant degree shy of being a block of ice.

"Um, hello, cold water curse here," Ron answered with a defensive gesture at his own body. "Besides I know I'm not good enough to take anything away from her."

Kim shivered again, glaring daggers at Ron, but the righteous fury of her anger did little to warm her. Ron chastely averted his eyes as he noticed Kim's body respond to the stimulus of her impromptu wake up call. "Um, KP, you might want to, um, aheh, dry off and, um, change," he nervously mentioned with a nebulous wave of his hand at her chest.

Confused, Kim broke off glaring at Ron and glanced downward. She let out an 'eep' of embarrassment as a rosy blush formed on her cheeks and she gathered what bed sheets she could, soaking or otherwise, protectively in front of her.

"Out!" she ordered in a chilly tone, pointing at the stairs exiting the loft.

"Got it. Leaving," Ron yelped as he quickly bounded back down the stairs and shut the door behind him. He heard something that may have been a book or maybe even a shoe thump against the closed door.

"Well, I think that went well," Perfume commented from the safety of the hallway.

"Oh, just peachy," Ron groused sourly. "How come you ditched me?"

Perfume merely arched an eyebrow at her student. "You're the one that kept saying she was cranky when she first wakes up."

XXXXX

"Uh, maybe we should wait until you're a little less tweaked Kim," Ron suggested as he squared off against Kim in the informal sparring area set up in her back yard.

"I'm not tweaked," Kim growled back, taking her corner on the sandy sparring area that also served the Possible family as a volleyball court during the summer.

Ron gulped nervously. "Um, I think you might be just a wee bit tweaked there, KP."

"I... am not... tweaked," Kim ground out irritably as she made a fist and a knuckle popped.

"Right. Got it. Furthest thing from tweaked. My bad," Ron said quickly as his mind made the ominous connection that the sound of Kim's knuckle popping had sounded disturbingly similar to a gunshot. With that in mind he had a feeling that he was facing a firing squad without the benefit of a blindfold or a last cigarette. Not that he ever touched the things, too foul by far in his book.

"Can we get started already?" Kim asked in a tone that seemed far more appropriate for Shego, but Ron chose to keep that observation to himself.

"Um, okay, Kim. Here I come," Ron said as he threw a tentative jab at Kim's head.

Rapidly, Kim knocked aside Ron's jab and slipped inside his guard. She fired off two quick punches to his midsection that nearly doubled him over before she launched an uppercut that clipped his chin and drew him back upright, lifting him off his feet. She watched with triumphant eyes as Ron went sailing backwards in a short arc, his rough landing setting off short-lived whirlwinds of sand and dust.

Abruptly, Kim felt a torrent of ice, far colder than the water that had woken her only a few minutes ago, settle in the pit of her stomach. The exchange had lasted five seconds tops and she hadn't pulled any of her punches. Instantly guilt-ridden, she rushed to Ron's side and fell to her knees as she leaned over his prone body.

"Ron? Ron? Can you here me? Ron?" Kim asked desperately as she gently tapped his cheek in hopes of reviving him somewhat.

"Glugg," Ron gurgled incoherently as his eyes wildly whirled around in their sockets. "Did anyone catch the license plate numbers of them there purrty girls that hit?" he babbled weakly, slurring his words as the orbits his eyes were making slowed somewhat.

"Oh, Ron. I'm so sorry," Kim apologized, cradling his head in her hands as full consciousness slowly returned to him. "I don't know what came over me. I meant to start off slow. I wouldn't have really hit you like that. I mean I did. But I shouldn't have. You have to believe me."

Ron blinked and looked up at the rapidly lightening morning sky. That was safe, if the mostly empty sky wanted to whirl about wildly that was fine by him. He blinked again as a trio of Kim's face slipped back into view and after a few minutes of concentrating he managed to consolidate the view into a single image.

"So, not tweaked?" Ron asked archly as he tried working his jaw around.

Kim winced and blew an embarrassed breath out from between her teeth as she felt a blush once againrise on her cheeks. "Well, not anymore," she amended softly, berating herself for her lack of control.

"Okay. Good to know," Ron nodded quickly and winced suddenly as the movement brought a renewed flash of pain.

"We'll take it slow now. I mean really slow," Kim offered as she levered Ron up into a sitting position. "Just light exercises. No more sparring today."

"Okay, Kim," Ron agreed readily enough as his new position sent more pain stabbing through him. "Can we wait for the backyard to stop spinning around first?"

Unseen by either teen, but caught by Perfume's keen hawk-like eyes, the Lotus Amulet around Ron's neck glittered with a silvery light that lingered for only a second before flowing into Ron's flesh. Nodding knowingly to herself Perfume decided that tomorrow's lesson should be interesting indeed.

XXXXX

Their second sparring session had started out much, much slower. Kim was up and ready well before Ron and Perfume arrived. She did not want a repeat of Perfume's wakeup call. After a series of warm up exercises to get the blood flowing, Kim tentatively moved on to some light sparring and started out by throwing out a series of jabs that Ron managed to block effectively with a few minor critiques from her. From there she progressed to light punches and kicks that Ron also managed to avoid or block. She felt more than a little tweaked at that. Kim knew that she was good enough of a fighter that she should have landed a couple of hits by now. She took her game up another notch and then another and another, determined to get through Ron's guard until she found herself staring incredulously at a triumphant Ron.

"Give me an R! Give me an O! Give me an N! What's that spell!" Ron continued crowing about his sparring victory over Kim.

"Ron!" Kim yelled and finally broke through to the celebrating teen.

"Bingo!" Ron crowed happily. "You win the solid gold kewpie doll!"

Kim merely scowled at him from her position on the ground and imperiously extended a hand for Ron to help her up.

"Oh sorry, KP," Ron apologized as he quickly helped Kim to her feet. "I didn't hurt you or anything did I?" His concern for her well-being momentarily dampening his ecstatic mood. "I didn't mean to toss you at that tree and all."

"I'm fine, Ron," Kim said tersely, brushing his concerns aside and turned away from him as she stretched some of the kinks out of her back.

Kim grimaced at the aches she felt at this ungodly early time, the aches that Ron had just recently delivered and she found herself forced to say something to bolster her spirits. "If this keeps up I guess I'll have to stop holding back when we spar," she said lightly.

Had Kim been facing the other direction, she would have seen Ron's jubilant expression fall at that thoughtlessly delivered comment.

XXXXX

"Hey, Dr. D," Shego called out from across the lair, making Drakken flinch unexpectedly.

"She's not a cat, she's not a cat," Drakken whispered quietly to himself before turning around with a forced smile plastered across his face. "Yes, Shego?" he said with exaggerated pleasantness.

After that incident where Shego had gone, had gone – well, might as well call it as it was – insane, working around her had been like walking on eggshells. Drakken didn't know what had set her off, – okay, well, maybe the pit of starving cats had something to do with it – but he didn't know what would set her off on another rampage.

Perhaps even more frightening was the fact that after Shego had calmed down Drakken had gone to the pit where his plan had gone so horribly awry. He had expected that he would need to hose down the pit and call in his henchmen to truck out the hundreds of mutilated cat corpses, but instead he found absolutely nothing. And by nothing he literally meant nothing. There was not a single cat, not a single hair, not even a single drop of blood. Nothing.

It was asif every single feline had simply vanished.

That was ... patently impossible. It defied the very laws of physics.

Drakken had his henchmen comb the chamber inch by inch for clues to the mystery. And on the off chance that the answer might have been in metric, he had them go back over the chamber centimeter by centimeter. He scanned for every conceivable form of energy, even going so far as to pull out the as yet untested dimension tuner just in case a transdimensional rift had been opened without his knowledge. He collected a veritable mountain of data, all of which told him the exact same thing.

Nothing.

Drakken watched silently as Shego swiped the inside of her wrist along the back of her neck. Ever since that day Shego's actions had become even more disturbingly cat-like. It showed up in her unconscious actions and even more so in her body language. For the most part Shego seemed unaware of the minute changes that came across in her new mannerisms.

Personally, Drakken found them to be extremely disturbing. Shego had acted like a cat once before, but that had been an effect of the moodulators and she had been meowing, purring and clawing the air in front of him as some sort of freaky come on. Was that really supposed to be sexy? That had been bad, but this... this was worse. Much worse.

"I'm getting bored. Don't you think it's time for a little evil?" Shego said as she stretched and set her magazine down.

Drakken flinched. "Drakken-goes-ouch evil or take-over-the-world evil?" he asked timidly.

Shego rolled her eyes, wondering what had gotten into Drakken recently. He was so jumpy lately. "Doy! Take over the world evil."

Drakken's expression brightened from the cowed look of barely suppressed terror to one of manic glee. "Oh goody, and I have just the plan too!"

Shego rolled her eyes again, this time at Drakken's abrupt mood swing. "Uh huh. Sure you do, Doc."

"No, this time we can't fail," Drakken gushed as he capered about as he always did before unfolding his villainous plans to her. "We are going to hold the world hostage by stealing the ultimate weapon." He paused for a moment in a suitably villainous pose for dramatic effect.

Shego furrowed her brow as she tried to discern Drakken's meaning. "What? That Pan-demented vorto thingie? Didn't they decide to just lob that thing at Jupiter and be done with the blasted thing?"

Drakken quickly shook his head, so intent on divulging his master plan that he completely forgot the fact that he was terrified of Shego. "No. Not the Pan-Dimensional Vortex Inducer. Besides, that's Dementor's schtick. The way he keeps going on and on about Las Vegas. You'd think the man would learn to forgive and forget already. And really Shego, can you please try to get the names right? It saves on all sorts of confusion. I mean if I ask for a Pan-Dimensional Vortex Inducer and you bring me a Trans-Dimensional Vortex Inducer who knows what kind of chaos would ensue from that blunder."

"Uh huh, sure. Whatever," Shego said as she brushed aside Drakken's attempt at constructive criticism, barely even registering the words. "So what the heck are we going to steal then?"

"Come on, Shego. You're certainly smarter than that," Drakken admonished his sidekick. "What is potentially the most powerful weapon on the planet?" he asked as he tapped the side of his skull with a pair of his tiny fingers.

Shego raised an eyebrow at her employer. "Okay. You kinda lost me there, Dr. D."

Drakken shook his head and tut-tutted her lack of deductive skills. "Well, in a way, not surprising. After all, you do think too small, Shego."

Shego settled for glaring at Drakken, ready to blast him but good if he didn't spill his plan and fast.

His lips curled up in broad grin. "For you see, knowledge is a power of a higher order."

XXXXX

"So you woke up at Camp Gottagrin?" Crystal asked Tara incredulously. The two of them were supposed to have met up at the mall on Saturday, but the blonde girl had never shown. Talking with Tara over the phone had proven to be so unenlightening that Crystal had resolved to catch up with Tara at school on Monday morning. Conflicting schedules kept them from passing more than a few sentences in the hall under Mr. Barkin's watchful eye so Crystal found herself having to wait for lunch in order to brace Tara for all the details. Though now that she had the whole story, what little there was of it, Crystal could barely bring herself to believe it.

"Yeah, I was just sitting there by that old cabin," Tara explained and trailed off in a longing sigh. "It just brought back the memories of everything that happened there."

"And you really don't remember anything about why you went there in the first place?"

Tara shook her head and then put a finger to her lips. "Actually, now that I think about it, I do kinda remember being really mad at Kim for some reason."

"Weird," was all that Crystal could finally say, recalling her own strange experiences with the camp, better left forgotten. But obviously Camp Gottagrin had affected Tara far more profoundly. She cast a glance across the cafeteria wherethe object of Tara's affections sat alone at a table, meticulously avoiding eye contact as he ate his tray of cafeteria lady's glop.

Tara nodded in agreement. "Totally."

"So what are you going to do now?" Crystal asked after a moment of introspective silence had passed between the two teens.

"Well, what do you think I should do?" Tara asked her friend for her advice.

"You know it's rude to answer a question with another question," Crystal answered as she bravely spooned some cafeteria food into her mouth.

Tara settled for leveling an intimidating glare at her friend and confidante.

Rolling her eyes, Crystal jerked a thumb over at Bonnie. "Ask our glorious leader for a special dispensation," she suggested with a sardonic grin. "Or at the very least maybe a one day pass."

Tara looked shocked at that suggestion and her gaze flicked from Bonnie to Ron and back again. "I couldn't. Could I?" she asked hopefully.

Crystal shook her head in despair at Tara's timidness. For a girl who had gone through several boyfriends over the last year she could be so damn skittish when it came to Ron. Though now that she thought about it, the fact that Tara was so hung up on Ron could help to explain exactly why the blonde cheerleader had gone through so many boyfriends.

"Look at the way Bonnie's been watching Ron," Crystal pointed across the cafeteria to where the brunette was watching Ron with an oddly intense expression on her face as the boy rapidly shoveled his lunch into his mouth. "Something's gotta be going on between them. I haven't seen her stare at anyone like that. Ever. Maybe she changed her mind about moving Ron up the food chain."

Tara's wide eyes locked upon Bonnie.

"Go talk to Bonnie," Crystal ordered giving Tara's chair a nudge. "The worst she can do is say no and then you'll have the really tough decision to make."

"And that is?"

"Whether or not you want to lead a rebellion against Queen Bonnie's rule," Crystal answered back. "I'm just glad it's not me."

Tara shot Crystal a dark look. "Thanks a lot. You're a big help."

"I'm just saying," Crystal replied, holding up her hands in surrender. "But seriously talk with Bonnie first before you decide to commit social suicide." She pointed her fork in the opposite direction of Ron and Bonnie. "Besides, I heard that Jason Morgan might become available soon."

XXXXX

Bonnie stared hard at the back of Ron Stoppable's head as if by sheer mental force she could pick apart his mind and learn what exactly had happened on Saturday afternoon. By some of the accounts that she had heard, she was apparently guilty of getting into a cat fight with Kim's Club Banana friend, Monique, with the loser as the prize. Monique, decent enough girl, stylish, but definite points off for being friends with both Kim and Ron. Honestly though, Bonnie hadn't thought that Monique was even remotely interested in Ron.

The frustration of not knowing what had happened was starting to drive her insane. She had briefly entertained the thought that Ron had drugged her and whisked her off to her home to get his freak on. There were several of obvious problems with that scenario. First, why would he take Bonnie to her home. Second, there was the matter of her special outfit, Ron should have had no idea where she had hidden it. Third, she had a vague memory of straddling Ron and holding him down on her bed. Fourth, why had Ron left his hockey jersey at her house?

This was so not good. If needed, she could spin chasing Ron as hunting him down for some offense or other. It was a little flimsy, but a believable enough scenario considering their history. But all of her spin doctoring hinged on Ron, how much he knew and how much he was telling. Say if the worst did happen and she did (eww) bump pelvises, she wasn't sure if her social standing could survive such a hit.

Irritably, Bonnie began tapping the table with a finger tip, not really caring about the damage she was doing to her manicure. If there was only some way of finding out what Ron knew.

"Bonnie? Did something happen between you and Ron?" Tara asked as she slipped into a seat beside Bonnie and the brunette twitched guiltily.

Fortunately, at the beginning of the lunch period Bonnie had claimed the table for her exclusive use, leaving the two of them blessedly alone. Her glacially cool demeanor had effectively frozen out anyone else who might have dared to sit with her. Though no words were spoken, Bonnie had made it abundantly clear that her fellow classmates were more welcome in a tankful of piranha than sitting with her.

"Why? What did you hear?" Bonnie demanded, her voice barely above a quiet, menacing hiss. This could be bad, Tara was somewhere around the middle of gossip chain and if something had gotten to her, it was already nearly around the school.

"Um, n-nothing," Tara replied nervously. "You're just kinda staring at him a lot."

"I am not," Bonnie quicklyshot backperhaps a tad too defensively.

"Uh, okay," Tara said quickly. Arguing a point with Bonnie was not going to help her make her case.

Bonnie sighed and broke off her observation of Ron. "Okay. What's this all about?"

Suddenly, Tara began to fidget under Bonnie's scrutiny and her hands began to nervously twist together on her lap. "Um, well, you see, the thing is..." her voice trailed off uncertainly, her courage withering under the intense heat of Bonnie's irritated glare.

"Spit it out, Tara," Bonnie growled, her patience wearing more than a little thin at this point.

"I want to date Ron!" Tara burst out suddenly and immediately hung her head in shame as an embarrassed blush rose on her face. She looked around, but fortunately her outburst didn't appear to reach Ron's ear, though there were more than a few smirks around her. "I mean that is, if it's okay with the food chain and all."

Bonnie stared at Tara in shock. Much like she did that day in the locker room when Tara had put forth the ludicrous idea that Ron was getting hotter. When was the girl going to learn? She was a cheerleader for God's sake! And cheerleaders don't date losers!

Abruptly, Bonnie smiled. It was not a pleasant smile.

This could actually be a good thing. If Ron dated Tara, sure he would rise slightly in the food chain, but it would make it slightly more acceptable for herself to have done something with Ron. Plus, if she played it right she could make it seem like she had stolen Ron from the blonde cheerleader only to cruelly dump him afterwards. Overall, her position would be secure, Tara would take a hit in status and Ron would once again be banished to the bottom of the food chain where he belonged. Perhaps if she thought about this hard enough she could somehow get Kim's standing in the school's social order to take a hit too.

In short, it was a very intriguing possibility.

"Sweetie, of course you can date Ron," Bonnie said in a sickeningly sweet voice.

Tara blinked in surprise, finding it a little odd that Bonnie was reversing her usual position, but was reluctant to question her good fortune. "Really?" she asked tentatively, thinking that perhaps Bonnie was somehow playing her in some sort of cruel joke.

But to her surprise, Bonnie merely nodded her affirmation and gave the blonde what was supposed to be an encouraging nudge. "Really. Go get your Ron, Tara."

"Oh, thank you, Bonnie!" Tara squealed as she threw her arms around the other girl. "You have no idea how much this means to me."

"Oh, I think I do," Bonnie answered back with a very smug smirk, much like the one that would have appeared on the face of a the proverbial cat, moments before it swallowed the equally proverbial canary.

XXXXX

Shego cocked her head to one side, her tongue working the inside of her cheek as she divided her attention between the mysterious bit of technology that Drakken had engaged her to liberate from the high security lab and her employer himself. The device in question was a small, unremarkable cube, maybe about nine inches to each side with what looked like a mass of high tech spaghetti stuffed into its innards. She gave Drakken a puzzled look as the mad scientist fussed over the device that he had her steal. If she listened closely she could hear Drakken humming under his breath, biding his time for that moment of solitude where he could burst out in some inanely gleeful song as he puttered about the lair.

"Okay, maybe I'm not as well versed on the mad science as you are, but this does not look like an ultimate weapon," Shego finally broke the silence with her comment, her voice dripping with a sizable measure of bored sarcasm. "Actually, it doesn't look like much of anything. Except maybe a funky paperweight."

"It is not a paperweight!" Drakken shot back indignantly.

"You're right. I'd get a better price pawning off a paperweight," Shego quickly agreed.

Drakken fumed at Shego's flippant tone, every muscle in his body tensing momentarily. Taking a deep breath, he let his frustrations flow out of him as he released the air from his lungs. "Shego. Try to see things in a broader perspective," he said pleasantly as he turned to return to his work. "In its own way, this device is ten, no a hundred times more powerful than those Golem tanks we stole."

"Now see, that's a heist I can get behind," Shego said, recalling the power of the Mishima Heavy Industries war machine. Pity, that all of them had gotten blown up in Drakken's lame plan to take over Kim Possible's hometown.

"There you go again, thinking far too small," Drakken chided.

Shego's hand suddenly came ablaze with her power and she pointed a glowing fist in Drakken's direction. "That's the second time you said that! If you don't spill, and soon, you're going to get a blast right where it really hurts!"

"This is a revolutionary and highly sophisticated Artificial Intelligence device designed under the auspices of DARPA to completely integrate all elements of the nations military assets," Drakken explained quickly before Shego could lose what little remained of her temper and patience.

The green glow around Shego's hand winked out. "Uh, care to try that without all the geek talk?"

Drakken growled and hunched his shoulders pugnaciously. "It's a very advanced computer system," he said in a very flat and sulky tone.

"Now see, why couldn't you just say that in the first place?" Shego innocently asked.

"Because it sounds a million times smarter my way!"

"And obviously you need all the help you can get."

"SHEGO!"

"Okay, okay. I got it. It's a computer geek's wet dream," Shego said dismissively. "So now what are you going to do with it? Use it to help you on your taxes?"

Drakken paused and blinked owlishly at her. "You know, I hadn't thought about that," he said in awe as he leaned over to embrace the device and rubbed his cheek lovingly against it.. "Oh, sweet, sweet machine, to unravel the many mysteries and complexities of the tax code."

Shego raised an eyebrow. "Okay, that's coming off as a little ... weird? No. Somehow weird doesn't seem enough to cover it. Fruity! Yeah, that's the word I'm thinking of."

"Go ahead and laugh now, Shego," Drakken scoffed, ignoring Shego's sarcastic comments. "But when you see how much money this baby is going to save me on my taxes..."

"We're evil. We don't pay taxes," Shego interrupted. She gave Drakken a piercing look as if she could see past the flesh and bone and peer directly into his mind. "You do pay taxes don't you?" Shego sounded both skeptical and amused at the same time.

"Dr. Drakken doesn't pay taxes," Drakken retorted hotly as he drew himself up into a posture of stiff dignity. "But to keep up certain appearances Drew Lipsky still does."

Shego snorted with barely suppressed mirth. "What on earth could you possibly have that would be worth taxing?" she snickered.

Drakken glared at her. "If you must know, I occasionally receive a bit of welfare assistance from the government," he informed her in an injured tone of voice.

It was all too much for Shego as she burst out into gales of laughter. When it seemed as though the giggle fit had run its course she caught sight of Drakken's injured expression and burst out in a fresh wave of laughter, this time pointing and gasping for breath as tears leaked from the corner of her eyes.

"Are you quite finished?" Drakken demanded somewhat acerbically as Shego's raucous laughter finally trailed off into a weak series of giggles.

"Just a sec," Shego gasped and began laughing again, this time holding her middle as she doubled over. Finally, she straightened back up and managed to contain herself with an occasional moan that sounded suspiciously like another fit of giggles as she wiped the tears from her eyes. "Okay. You were saying, Doc?"

"As I was saying, this is arguably the most advanced computer system on the planet," Drakken explained, his voice full of reverent awe as he spread his hands over the stolen AI like a high priest of technology pronouncing a benediction over an offering.

"Don't we already have a computer?" Shego asked as she jerked a thumb at the rebuilt monstrosity of a computer that took up an entire wall of the lair. Drakken never had explained to her satisfaction how the computer had gotten torn apart in the first place.

"Not like this one we don't!" Drakken crowed, his eyes nearly aglow with his excitement. "This unit's processing power is lightyears beyond what anyone on the planet has! That old relic can't hold a candle to this AI!"

"So like a man, always has to have the newest and shiniest model," Shego commented dryly.

"Yes, well all that aside, with the use of this revolutionary AI we can invade every electronic system in the world at our merest whim. Passwords! Pfffttt! Firewalls! Who cares? Nothing will be able to stop us!"

"And how exactly is this going to help us?"

"Just think of all the possibilities, Shego!" Drakken said with a manic gleam in his eye. "We will own the internet. Cyberspace will be our playground. We can tap into every online transaction and funnel all the half cents into our bank account."

"Wait!" Shego suddenly said and held up a hand to halt Drakken's tirade. "That last bit sounds familiar. Wasn't that in a movie or something?"

"Superman III, okay, but personally I didn't feel that it was good as number two, though it did have its moments," Drakken informed her with a sage nod of his head. "Now, if you don't mind, I was in the middle of my evil rant."

"Go ahead, Dr. D," Shego sighed and made a bored gesture with her fingers to encourage him to continue.

Holding aloft two cables, Drakken reared back, reveling in the victory that would soon be his and his alone. "Now bear witness, Shego. With this final connection, every electronic system on the planet will bow to my will!"

"You do know this plan is never going to work," Shego pointed out before Drakken could bring his hands together. "It always sound so foolproof at this point, but then somehow you go and mess it up."

"Well, okay, Miss Smartypants. What do you have to say to this?" Drakken demanded as he made the last connection with dramatic flourish and proudly pointed a finger at the lair's large screen monitor.

Slowly the AI's systems began to come on line and random bits of data began to scroll across the screen. After a few moments of that activity the monitor reverted to a blank screen and Drakken leveled a glare that the AI's chassis, much put out by by this apparent betrayal by his newly acquired piece of technology and key to his plans for world domination. Growling slightly under his breath, Drakken pushed up the sleeve of his blue lab coat and quickly brought a tiny fist down on top of the unit much to Shego's amusement.

To their mutual surprise, Drakken's action was rewarded with the sounds of electronic activity from within the cube and more data began to flow across the lair's monitor. Finally, after a number of incomprehensible screens of computer code were displayed and innumerable calculations were completed, the monitor gave way to a crudely rendered face that took up the majority of the screen space.

"Hello. How about a nice game of tic tac toe?" the AI asked in an electronically modulated voice that sounded anything but state of the art. Though the 'lips,' if one could actually call them that, did move somewhat in time with the painfully slow words that had come over the speakers.

Shego cocked her head to one side, her lips curling in amusement as she stared at the massive monitor where the purported AI cheerfully displayed a tic tac toe board. At least, she assumed that the AI was feeling cheerful since the line that represented its mouth was turned upwards at the ends. Finally, with a chuckle and a shake of her head she looked over at Drakken where the mad scientist was scratching his head and staring at the AI in confusion.

"Okay," she said slowly in order to gain his attention and tapped at her lower lip thoughtfully before making her next comment. "So if this is a revolutionary 'AI,' why's it asking you to play tic tac toe?"

"SHEGO!"

XXXXX

Next: Part 2 – Shego's new powers get put into action

A/N: Thanks for reading and reviewing!

So very sorry to take so long to get an update in, but for some reason getting writing done was as painful as pulling teeth by myself while hitting myself on the head with a hammer.

My humblest of apologies that I didn't get replies out to everyone that reviewed. I tend to be very bad about emails and invitations as well.

But a warm mucho gracias goes out to Necrovore, Yamal, chao-hellsing, smith119, spectre666, Devinel, Cyberwraith9, peacekeeperchuck, dreams-walker, warprince2000, Otritzi, conan98002, Lycropath, calamite, and Reikson. Now I did spell everyone's name right, yes?

Now my original intent was to get a full story/chapter in, but the length of this chapter was going to run close to the same size of my last chapter of around 50 pages and quite probably take the same 7 months. So I decided to break this chapter up and post it in sections and get updates in faster. So I'm going to be limiting myself to 20-25 pages. The next chapter should be out hopefully before the end of the month.

Not a whole lot of action to speak of this time around, but there'll be more in the next chapter. As well as some fallout pertaining to the lust potion.

Oh, Shego may seem to be a little dense figuring out Drakken's plan, but I prefer to think of it as deliberately goading him.

About Kim being so hard to wake up. Sunday just after dawn. Who can get up at that time? I know I'd be a bear. Besides, home's her 'safe zone' no attacks there and all so her guard was down.