Chapter 7: Recovering

After earning permission to take her under his care when released, he quietly entered the room and expected her to be fast asleep. Sitting in the some what comfortable chair next to her, he jumped slightly when a hand rested on his knee. Placing his hand on top of her's, he smiled where he knew she was and was not terribly surprised when she suggested something, "John, there's room to me." Gripping her fingers tightly in a reply, he made the effort to toe off his shoes before standing to remove his suit jacket.

Helping her first to move over a little, he gently slid next to her and making sure the blanket was covering her well enough for his liking. Hearing movement down near her feet, he saw a dark shadow move to the floor and give a small grunt as he laid down on the floor. Smiling to himself at Ace's way of giving more room, he draped an arm over her while his other arm when under her neck, holding her closer to him. But not to cause any harm to her healing self, which she was grateful for by how slowly he was pulling her close.

Exhaling a small breath, Maria pressed the side of her face against his chest, hearing his heartbeat as clear as daylight. "Thank you," she whispered as her eyes slipped closed and couldn't help but smile when she felt him kiss her uninjured temple. Gently stroking her shoulder with his fingers, he let a sad smile slip past when it hit him-he was holding her once again for their own comfort.

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Four days later, John held the door open while gently bracing Maria as she entered his apartment slowly. Healthy enough to be released, but still sore and pained by the stitches really made it hard to stand, let alone walk. Lowering her down onto the couch, John excused himself to the kitchen, grabbing a tall glass of cold water and his phone, to call up the perfect shrink he knew to help her emotionally.

"Huang speaking."

"It Munch, I need to speak with you about a personal subject...of a friend."

"I heard about the female detective from Boston. Is that your friend you're talking about?"

"Yes, she's going to need someone to help her emotionally at the moment, well...not at this moment..."

Huang chuckled on the other end, "I understand, John. When would you like me to come over? Seeing her today will give her too much strain, since she just came out of the hospital," John heard rustling of papers on the other end. "How about in two days around noon?"

Looking over at Maria, who looked to be in a dazed situation from her medication, he closed his eyes and pinched the bridge of his nose, "That'll work, doc. I need to get her to bed now, she's close to crashing on the couch right now."

Okay, I'll be over in a few days and do me a favor?" He paused for a moment, gathering his thoughts, "If and when she does have nightmares, hold her close and sooth her to wake her up, then grab a damp towel to cool her down and a glass of water to relax her."

"Understood," shutting his phone and carefully sitting next to her, John handed her the glass as he rubbed her back in a calming manner. "How about laying down and getting some rest. You're looking a little loopy from the medication your on."

Leaning against him for support, Maria contemplated that offer with the hazy feeling that was going through her head. Closing her eyes and exhaling a deep breath, she nodded against his shoulder, "yeah, I need some rest."

Helping her into the bedroom, John sat her down on the bed, placed the glass on the night stand and placed a worn out comforter on the floor for Ace. Hearing a soft thud behind him, he looked over his shoulder to see Maria had laid down, her eyes drooping shut. Slowly untying her shoelaces and removing her sneakers from her feet, he draped a warm comforter over her tired body. Laying on the other side, he reached out and ran his fingers through her hair and gave a warm smile, "I missed you, Maria. Hang on for me baby," He whispered as her hand came out from under the blanket and took a firm hold of his hand.

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A few hours later, John jerked awake to find a warm figure huddling against him, trembling in her sleep. Bracing up on his elbow, John gently grasped her shoulder and whispered her name before her eyes snapped open, fear flooding her eyes. "What's the matter, sweetie, did you have a nightmare?" Taking a few shuttered breathes, she pressed her face to his chest and choked out a painful sob, making his heart arch for her pain, "oh, baby, I'm right here and no one is going to harm you now," John continued to sooth her, his hand on her back and slowly comforting her.

Holding her tightly, he sat up and slowly rocked side to side, "It's okay, Maria, it going to be all right," he whispered as she continued to cry against him, her hands grasping the front of his shirt and tears streaming down her already red cheeks. Moments passed before her sobs turned into small coughing fits and fighting regulate her breathing, warning John to take a hold of a glass of water and held it to her lips. Taking small sips between deep breaths, the shaking slowly subsided and all that was left was the sound of her sniffling. Placing his hand on her neck and feeling it was very warm, he laid her back down and retrieved a damp paper towel. Gently dabbing her neck and face, John softly spoke to her in a tone she found very soothing and the cold feeling on her skin added to the comfort.

Reaching out and taking a hold of his hand, she grasped it as tight as she could possibly do, giving him a silent thank you. Closing her eyes, but not letting go of his hand, she sighed in exhaustion and slowly drifted back to sleep. Once John was sure she was sound asleep, he carefully pulled his hand from her hold and slowly walked to the kitchen, his shoulders sagging from the weight he was feeling. Standing in the middle of his kitchen, he threw his head back and closed his eyes, "Why do I feel scared for her? I know I have to be strong for her," he spoke to no one is particular, "But I feel so damn weak to care for her!" He hissed out instead of raising his voice, fearing of waking her. Pacing around his kitchen, he squinted his eyes shut to keep the tears in and thought hard of what to do, to keep her comfortable while she continued to heal was his top priority.

Grabbing a bottle of beer from the refrigerator, John drank down a generous amount of it just because, it felt like something he should do at the moment. Hearing the sound of clicking nails on the tile floor, John looked down to see Ace staring at him. The big brown eyes stared at John's brown ones, as if trying to tell him what to do for her - what he could do to help her. "I'm trying, Ace, but...I'm scared for her," exhaling a long, slow breath at the frustration of not being able to think of anything he could do, John walked back to the bedroom and saw her sitting up, her eyes huge with fear and tears. Oh, shit.

"I...you weren't here and...," she stopped when he wrapped his arms around her without a word, "I'm sorry if I'm not as strong...like I used to be..."

Mentally kicking himself for leaving her alone, John closed his eyes and held her closer to him. "No, don't say that, sweetie, it's not your fault. I'm sorry I left you alone and...I shouldn't have done that to you." John pulled back to look her in the face, his fingers under her to chin to get her to look at her, "I didn't leave the room because of you, Maria, I just needed to think and did I didn't want to disturb you."

Hiding her face from him, she pulled away and laid down with her back to him, "You should be spending more time with victims who are not cowards like me. I was a coward that day and still am, afraid that he'll be back, afraid I was not able to stop it from happening again, afraid of hurting anyone else."

"What do you mean 'hurting anyone else'?" John scooted closer to her and ran a hand over her arm, trying to reassure her, "what do you mean?"

"I know I hurt you that day I left Baltimore and don't deny it," she whispered as she curled into the blankets, "I left feeling like I wanted to run like a coward...and I did." Choking back her sobs, she buried her face into the blankets and clenched her jaw to fight the pain and fear.

Watching her struggle with and pushing him away in fear of hurting him, John wrapped his arms around her and pulled her to the point she was almost on his lap. Slowly rocking her from side to side, they both sat in silence for what felt like hours and only sounds was Maria's sniffling and John soothing her when she would release silent tears. Feeling her grip loosening, he continued to rock her comfortingly as he rested his cheek on top of her head. The longer they sat there, the more his thoughts wondered to when they first met and how he wished for anything to happen just for them to be together, feeling that pull to protect her from the smallest of paper cuts to a perp with his sights on her.

"Remember when we first met?" He started quietly, not wanting to startle her from the sudden sound of words, "I fell head over heels for you and wanted to follow you like a love sick puppy. I wanted to spend every moment with you from the second our hands touched from that hand shake and I really couldn't believe you were considered one of the best detectives - until I saw you working with that one suspect we had. You were like a lion stalking out your prey and striking at the right time to get that confession, getting the satisfaction of your catch along the way." Looking into her face, he could clearly see a faint smile on her lips as she remembered that day and it made him smile just to see he made her happy for that moment.

"I can't believe that I really forgot that day, with that man who assaulted and killed part of his family, but I can't forget that little girl," She lifted her eyes to look at him, "Little Diane is still up here though," she tapped her temple with her finger, "and I wonder how she's doing..."

"Last time I heard, she's doing great and getting good grades in school," he honestly said, "and she has not forgetting you nor Alex for what you had done to protect and defend her."

Closing her eyes at the exhaustion taking over, Maria mumbled out a few words that John could have swore was 'I love you,' but he didn't get his chance when he realized she had fallen asleep in his arms, her chest rising and falling with deep breaths. Laying her back down on the bed, John made sure she was comfortable and warm before taking a chance at possibly getting some sleep for a few hours before she woke again, due to her medication wearing off and the pain starting again.