Happy New Year to you guys too :3
Guild is still the Grand Mage in this chapter, and Caelan's last name is obviously made up.
Warning: This has some Fletchyrie that Tariana Grace inspired me to write :)
It was the Sanctuary New Year's Ball of 2010. Thurid Guild had announced his plans to throw it to, as he said, 'raise everyone's morale'. (''More like feel all the pretty blondes up without his wife knowing,'' winked Tanith, momentarily forgetting that she was a pretty blonde.)
Valkyrie and Tanith herself were getting ready at the latter's as Gordon's mansion was cold at this time of year and 'Full of draughty winds that swept up your skirt and gave Fletcher plenty of oppurtunities to look up your skirt' according to Fletcher himself.
The car the girls had hired would be picking them up in five minutes, so they stood in front of the full-length mirror and checked their outfits. Valkyrie was dressed in a floor-length red gown Tanith had bought for her after threatening that she would get Valkyrie into a dress under pain of death. The older woman was wearing a green cocktail dress that complemented her court shoes, with diamond winking at her ears and wrist.
''This is going to be so much fun,'' grinned Tanith, slinging an arm round Valkyrie's shoulders. ''A night where we can just dance and have fun without anyone trying to beat us up.'' Valkyrie sighed. ''Well, you're going with your boyfriend. Caelan was the only one to ask me.'' Tanith laughed. ''I still don't get how Skulduggery let you go with a vampire.''
''Neither do I. I think he knows there's all the security in the Sanctuary so he wouldn't try anything tonight.'' A car horn beeped outside. Tanith squealed . ''Let's go, let's go!'' she yelled, dragging a laughing Valkyrie behind her.
As soon as they entered the Sanctuary ballroom, Tanith whistled. Most of the Sanctuary workers seemed to be there, even some from abroad, milling about the floor. Huge strings of lights lit up the ceiling and hundreds of white tablecloth-draped tables lined the room. Waiting for them at the doors was Ghastly, Caelan and Fletcher, all wearing sharp tuxedos. Tanith frowned. ''Where's Skulduggery?'' Valkyrie shrugged slightly. ''I don't know. He told me dances aren't 'his thing'.''
In downtown Dublin, Skulduggery sat on a barstool beside Anton Shudder, a glass in hand. Shudder was pretty annoyed. ''When you asked me to come out tonight, I was actually happy. It's the first time you asked me for a night out since 1951. I thought 'Hey, maybe tonight we'll go out to a nice bar, have a few goes on a dance machine and score with some chicks'. But I'm just a replacement for Ghastly. It's always you two, isn't it, best mates, and I'm always the weird guy in the corner with great hair. But you didn't even pretend I wasn't a second choice. Just because you're a reclusive dead guy that doesn't like dances and can't get a girlfriend doesn't mean I am. I'm off to play Dungeons and Dragons with myself. Thanks for nothing, Skul.'' Shudder huffed, picked up his jacket and left.
Skulduggery raised his head off the bar. ''No, Anton, wait...'' he said, reaching out for the other man before falling off his chair, extremely stoned.
Back at the Sanctary Ghastly's eyes lit up as soon as he saw Tanith and he bent to kiss her fingers. ''You look beautiful.'' She giggled and took his arm. ''Hey,'' said Valkyrie awkwardly to Caelan. ''Shall we...?'' He nodded and took her right arm, leading Fletcher to the man that was announcing the new arrivals. He nodded at them then said in a magnified voice, ''Ghastly Bespoke and Tanith Low, Caelan Shadows and Valkyrie Cain, and-'' he was cut off as Fletcher whispered something quickly in his ear- ''Fletcher Renn and his hair.'' Valkyrie had to laugh as Fletcher patted his hair fondly then went off to stuff his face at the buffet.
Some fast music began to start up and Tanith swept a hesistant Ghastly onto the dance floor. Caelan offered his arm and Valkyrie took it as the strode onto the floor after the couple. ''You are incandescent,'' the vampire told her. ''You burn like the setting sun, and light up like the rising.'' Valkyrie sighed as they began to dance. It would be a long night.
A few hours later, Fletcher was sitting at a table gazing into a mirror. ''Care to dance, darling?'' he winked at his hair, bowing to himself. He turned around to see several Sanctuary officials staring at him.
He laughed awkwardly then sat down again.
Just as he started straightening a few hair strands he caught sight of Valkyrie sitting by herself at a table, trailing her fingers around the stem of a wineglass. He stopped what he was doing and bit his lip. ''Sorry, old friend,'' he whispered to the mirror before walking over to Valkyrie.
''Where's Fangalator?'' he asked, sitting down. Valkyrie half-smiled. ''He went off to, as he put it, do 'mopey brooding stuff that involves staring angstily into the distance' because it's what he's 'required to do as a tortured vampire poet-type' .''
Fletcher looked confused. ''I didn't understand a word of that.'' Valkyrie smiled properly this time. ''Doesn't matter, Fletch.'' He looked at her and made his mind up. This is it, Flerminator. Don't mess it up.''Want to dance, Val? Since fang-bang isn't here?''
The dark-haired girl looked surprised and slightly amused. ''Uh, yeah, cool.'' They got up and went to the floor as a slow song started. Fletcher put an arm around her waist and took one of her hands in his while she put her spare arm on his shoulder. They moved around the dance floor slowly, dancing between the other Sanctuary members. For once Fletcher's feet seemed to be obeying his brain.
Valkyrie looked up into Fletcher's face and she thought back to when she first met him, remembered thinking he was good-looking. Fletcher slowly smiled at her and she leaned up...
...just as he stepped backwards on Ghastlys' new tap shoes. Ghastly looked at Fletcher over Tanith's shoulder and growled. ''Let's go,'' Valkyrie whispered and they left the floor quickly to avoid Ghastly's wrath. ''I want to get some air.''
Outside Valkyrie leant on some railings, waiting for Fletcher to get back with their drinks. She took in a deep breath of the cold night air and had her eyes closed until the slamming of a car door made her look up.
James Evil was scurrying over the grass towards the Sanctuary. He was a man who had tried to be a villain much like Scapegrace and failed, the reason primarily being that Skulduggery had beaten him up, but also because his name was so stupid.
Valkyrie stepped away from the railings and strode over to him. ''James?'' she asked. ''What are you doing here?'' James looked up. ''Valkyrie Cain! It's curious that you're here - I suppose not really because this is the New Year's Party - to see my grand plan unfold!''
She sighed. ''What new scheme is this?''
He smirked and with a flourish pulled his jacket out so she could see the tangle of wires inside. ''All the Sanctuary workers are distracted this evening with their celebrations. It's a simple matter of setting this bomb under the building and then blowing it sky high once I'm a safe distance away!''
Valkyrie raised her eyebrows. ''So, why are you carrying out this insane plan?'' James opened his mouth to speak but she held out a hand.
''You know, I'm actually not interested. When you've heard as much revenge stories as I have you tend to get bored of them. Now, you want to walk yourself to a holding cell or are you going to make my job harder?''
He cackled, the little goatee on his chin wagging. ''I don't think so, Cain. You're just a little girl without that skele-'' he was cut off as Valkyrie's fist slammed into his jaw. He coughed then doubled over as she hit him again.''Come on!'' he howled. ''I've got all these expectations piled up on me to kill someone! Pressure, all the time! All I wanted to do was spend New Year's with someone that liked me but I can't, I just can't! The bomb was the only thing I could do!''
''And why can't you just leave us in peace for one night? Go home, James. I think there's a repeat of Scrubs on Channel 4,'' she said, then lit a fireball and threw it at him. He screamed as she spread her hands and the fire enveloped his body, causing him to wheel around and run down the street, presumably to the nearby park to throw himself in the duck pond.
Valkyrie knew FIetcher was behind her. ''He won't be back. I told him Scrubs was on, he'll be busy for tonight.'' She turned round and took a long gulp out of the paper cup Fletcher was holding out to her. ''I'm going to need to call Skulduggery and tell him we have another petty criminal to pick up tomorrow. But thanks for the drink.''
She was fishing her phone out of her dress pocket when the boy spoke. ''That was hot.''
Valkyrie looked up. ''Excuse me?''
''You beating that guy turned me on more than the time I woke up one morning and my hair was already spiked up.'' Valkyrie rolled her eyes as the bells began to sound out for the New Year.
''Want to go sing Beautiful at Ghastly's scars again?''
''I thought you'd never ask,'' she grinned.
They looked at each other that wasn't something, not quite yet. But it could be.
''Valkyrie, can we go inside, because this wind is going right through my tux into places you do not even want to think about.''
She grinned as they walked inside to join the mages celebrating and calling out Happy New Year's to one another. Not quite yet.
Skulduggery Pleasant walked back to his car at 4 A.M. still very stoned, minus his trousers, jacket and hat, and wondering how they got to be wrapped around the neck of a stripper.
