Disclaimer: I don't own anyone/thing except Quintus!!!!!

Chapter 7: Lessons of Life, Love and Getting the $#!% Beat Outta Ya

We open to another fine, beautiful day in Twilight Town. The sun is bright and sunny; the grass is green and lush—WAIT!!! There's actually grass in Twilight Town? Well let's set this anomaly aside for a moment and go to Sora and Quintus.

"Okay, let's start with lesson number one!" Sora said enthusiastically

"Okay, what's lesson number one?" inquired Quintus.

"My poor, poor, under- educated Quintus. Lesson one is the lesson that states "A keyblade master always wins" so, what have you learned so far?" asked Sora.

"Lets get this straight, one- I will be referred to as Quin from now on, two- if you're going to train me at this, I'm going to need some type of weapon. Three- okay there is no three." Stated Quin.

"Whoa! No need to get pissy! Here's a training keyblade, Quin."

As they proceeded with their training, Sora repetitively knocked Quin down with his keyblade.

"Hey! Knock it off!!!!!!!" yelled QUin, gasping as he got off the ground from the last hit.

"Hey, hey! What was lesson one again?"

"The keyblade master ALWAYS wins" they said in unison.

"That's right" said Sora.

"I'm beginning to hate lesson one." mumbled Quin under his breath.

"What was that?! Was that a racial slur? Are you slandering my teaching methods? Planning to impregnate Kairi? You better not. Betch. Deck. Shetbag." Sora said the last three words under his breath.

"NO!!!" defended Quin.

"Yeah you better not"

Quin then sighed and got the $#!% beat out of him… again.

After a LONG day, they finally go back home.

Sora plops himself on the couch and yells, "QUIN! COME HERE!!!"

"What! What is it!!?" Quin said as he ran into the living room.

"Time for lesson two."

"Oh no" whispered Quin.

"Lesson two is "keyblade masters ALWAYS get waited upon" so I want you to sit back, relax and enjoy because I hired your own wench for you!!!"

"Ah sweet!!"

"LaRonda, come in!!"

A large woman with acrylic nails comes in.

"Hello, I'm your wench LaRonda, I'm here to wait on you 24/7 because this guy paid me to. Get your moneys worth, cuz' I wasn't cheap."

Flashback

Sora's in an alley in Twilight Town. There are dead hookers and pimps lying on the ground. In the background there is cussing and a machine gun being fired.

"My price is 75 cents" said LaRonda

"I'll give you $1.00 to do ANYTHING he wants. Deal?"

"Deal" LaRonda quickly responded.

Sora then paid her which sealed the deal.

End flashback

After the day was over and LaRonda left, it was bedtime. Quin slept on the couch, and Sora went to his bedroom with Kairi. Even though Quin took two sleeping pills, he still couldn't sleep. He kept hearing somethind bump against the walls in Sora's room. He also heard OH YES! Over and over again from someone that sounded like Kairi. SO Quin just shrugged it off until he ralised what was going on.

"OH MY GOD." Said Quin to himself.

"Keep it down in there!!!" He yelled.

"People are tryin to sleep out here!!!"

So all in all, it was a good day for Quin. He got a servant wench, he raised his endurance by running from a crazy person, and he learned that Sora and Kairi have wild nights together.