Chapter 7
"Where the hell were you guys?" Matt yelled as Jessica and Jeff entered the hotel lobby. "I went back to the room and you were gone!"
"Sorry dude, we needed to get away for a little bit." Jeff told him.
"Well you could have at least let me know. I called your cell about ten times."
"We wanted to be alone." Jeff tried to give him a look to let him know to chill out.
"It's my fault Matt." Jessica spoke up. "I had to get out of there."
"You okay?" Matt asked giving her a hug.
"I'm going to be okay." She responded squeezing him back. "I'm sorry we freaked you out."
"Well as long as your fine." He released her and then gave her a quizzical look. "Do you guys know you're covered in sand?"
"Yea, we know." Jeff laughed. "It's a long story but we need to wash up so it will have to wait."
"Something tells me I don't want to know." Matt told them as they headed to the elevator. Once inside he turned to them. "Miller was here."
"Yea? What did he want?" Jeff asked.
"He wanted to talk to you about today but he got tired of waiting. He said to call him once you got in."
"Fine, we'll do it after dinner. Do you want to join us?"
"Thanks bro, but I'll leave you two alone." They exited the elevator and headed to their rooms.
"Are you sure?" Jeff asked as he opened the door to let Jess in.
"Yea, I'm just gonna grab a quick bite then head to the gym."
"Hey wait!" Jessica called after him. "What happened after we left?"
"Don't worry, it can wait till later." Matt told her looking away. "You guys enjoy your dinner."
"Thanks man but if you change your mind you'll know where we'll be." Jeff watched his brother walk away before shutting the door.
"Is Matt okay?" Jessica asked as he walked into the room.
"Yea, why?"
"I don't know. He just seemed off."
"He was probably still pissed about our disappearing act. Don't worry, you know Matt. After his work out he'll be fine. Now, what do you say we take that shower?" He asked pulling her towards the bathroom.
"Together?"
"Well yea. Why not?"
"I don't think we'll get too clean that way." She laughed.
"I'll wash your back and you'll wash mine." He said smiling.
"Yea, I'm sure. Listen, why don't I take my shower and you can figure out where we're going to eat."
"Wait you don't want to just order room service?"
"I think I'm room serviced out. Let's actually eat outside of the room."
"Then we can come back for desert?" He said suggestively pulling her close to him again.
"If you're good." Jessica gave him a kiss then went into the bathroom.
She quickly got undressed and stepped into the shower. As she washed she thought of Jeff and a smile came to her lips. She couldn't believe how understanding he had been today. She had been scared of what would happen if Jeff had found out the truth; that he would treat her differently but that hadn't been the case. He was the same as always knowing just what to say and do to make her feel better. With everything that has gone wrong in her life Jeff had become the one good thing she could count on. She stepped out of the tub and wrapped a towel around herself before stepping out of the bathroom.
"That was…" He didn't get a chance to finish because she came straight into the room and kissed him with such force they fell onto the bed. "Whoa. Not that I'm complaining but what was that for?"
"Because I love you." She told him.
"That's good enough for me." He said and they kissed again only longer. "Are you sure?"
"Yea. I want to." Her hands massaged his chest as she kissed his neck. Jeff lifted his shirt off and did the same to her as their lips never stopped touching one another. He rolled her over till he was on top. She moaned as he removed her towel then gently caressed her body. Jessica opened her eyes and stiffened.
All of the sudden it was Shane she was staring at and not Jeff. Terror rose inside her as she was transported back to the house. Again she found herself on the floor with Shane on top of her forcing himself on her.
"No, stop!" She cried out not realizing Jeff had already stopped knowing something was wrong as soon as she froze.
"Don't!" Jeff panicked not sure what he should do next. He looked down at her trembling body as she was reliving the attack.
"Jess, baby look at me." He said to her. She stared back at him her eyes wide open but it was like she wasn't there. Jeff couldn't bare the look of terror in her face. He wanted to reach out and shake her out of it but he remembered what she said about Shane holding her down forcefully. He didn't want to contribute to what her mind was already doing to her. She didn't see him anymore only Shane.
Her tears fell down her face as she whimpered and he couldn't take it anymore. He got back on the bed and pulled her into his arms. She fought him at first but he held on tight. Eventually her sobs subsided and she breathed heavily into him. They made eye contact and he knew she was back.
"Oh my god, I'm so sorry." She said when she finally aware of what was happening.
"Ssh, don't worry about it. It's okay." He rocked her soothingly.
"I don't know what happened. One minute it was you and me and everything was good. Next thing I knew you were gone. All I saw was Shane. He was on top of me and he was forcing… It was so real." She told him.
"It's all right. You're safe now. Shane's not here remember? He can't hurt you anymore. It's okay."
"It's not okay. I can't get him out of my head. It's like he's always going to be there. Even if he's in jail, he's always going to be in here. What am I supposed to do?" She looked to him.
"It'll happen. You'll see. We'll just take it slowly."
"I'm sorry." She said to him. "I just can't. I'm not ready."
"It's okay. I understand and I don't want you to worry about it." She shivered slightly and he realized that she wasn't dressed. "Let me get you some clothes." He told her and he started to release her.
"No don't." She held on to him tighter. "Just stay here."
"I won't go anywhere. I promise." He grabbed the blanket and wrapped it around them. "There, is that better?"
"Yea." She nodded.
"We'll figure this out." Jeff told her. "We'll find someone who you can talk to. They'll be able to help us."
"I feel so bad."
"You shouldn't. It's okay. We'll take it slow. You see this? The way we are right now? This is fine with me. As long as you're with me I don't need anything else."
"I ruined tonight."
"No you didn't but if you want we can just order some room service and eat in. It'll be better that way anyway. We can have a nice private dinner; no one will interrupt us. What do you think?"
She took a few moments to think about it. There was always a chance that if they went down to the restaurant they would run into someone they knew or they would be recognized. It was already well known where they were staying. On the other hand the awkwardness still lingered in the room. It might be good for a change of scenery.
"You know, let's go down to the restaurant." She said.
"Are you sure?" Jeff looked surprised.
"Yea, remind me what it's like to eat at an actual table again."
"Okay then. I'm gonna quickly wash up. Why don't you get dressed and then we can head down." He gave her a kiss. "Okay?" Jeff let out a sigh of relief when she finally let him go. He watched as she went to the dresser and pulled out a shirt. Shaking a little she started to get dressed.
"I'm okay. Go get ready." Jessica told him when she noticed him watching. He walked into the bathroom and she turned to look at herself in the mirror. "Pull it together girl. You're a mess. When he comes back out that door everything has to be okay again." She grabbed a tissue and wiped the streaks from her face. She just had to hold it together till this was over and they were back in North Carolina. The court case will be done, Shane will be in prison, and hopefully they could get on with their lives. It all sounded so simple but she felt absolutely terrible about what had just happened. There was no way Jeff wasn't hurt by what just happened. Her mind had just turned her boyfriend into her rapist.
Frustrated Jessica turned from the mirror. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw the phone sitting on the nightstand and thought about calling someone. She needed to vent to someone other than a Hardy. Amy was the closest friend she had now, but she was touring with her band and it had taken Jessica forever to convince her to do so. If she called now, Amy would high tail it back to her and that's not what Jess wanted. She was happy to see someone have a life.
That left only Stephanie. Their relationship was not what it used to be and it was more her fault then Steph's. No matter how hard either of them tried, she always felt uncomfortable talking to her about what had happened. Shane was her brother after all and it was weird asking Steph to take sides. She picked up the phone and with a sigh dialed.
"Hello?" She heard Stephanie's voice over the phone.
"Hey Steph, its Jess."
"Jess? Oh my god, I'm so glad you called. I wanted to talk to you today but first there was what happened in the court room and then when I went to find you after they said you were gone. Are you all right?"
"I'm fine. I just needed to get out of there but I'm okay." She paused. All of the sudden, she didn't want to talk about it.
"You're not okay." Steph told her. "I've known you long enough to know when you're lying. What's wrong?"
"It's nothing. I just want to see how you're doing."
"I'm on my way over." She cut Jessica off.
"No, wait. Steph, it's okay besides Jeff and I were about to go have dinner."
"Fine I'll put the kids to bed and then I'll be over. That should give you enough time." Jessica smiled when she realized Stephanie wasn't going to take no for an answer.
"Thank you." Jessica told her.
"It's no problem. I'm just glad you called me."
"Me too." Jessica said goodbye before hanging up the phone. She went back to getting dressed and by the time Jeff came out she thought she looked almost normal.
"Ready to go?"
"Do I look okay?"
"You look beautiful." He told her. She walked over to him kissing his cheek.
"Then I'm ready. Let's eat." She said lightly. And they walked out of the room.
