Okay all…this is the second to the last chapter. Thanks again for your reviews!!
Brennan had pulled a set of unidentified remains from the storage facility to examine. She didn't have any new cases and she had found herself staring at her computer screen for far too long, unable to pull her thoughts together enough to finish the chapter she was working on. She was hoping that if she started on an ID, the puzzle would help get her focused. She was sadly mistaken. She had been examining the same femur for an hour and still hadn't registered any findings.
"Dr. Brennan?" Zach popped his head into the exam room.
She looked up, glad for the distraction. "Yes, Zach?"
"Agent Sullivan is in your office, waiting to see you."
The sigh she heaved must have alarmed Zach because he stepped back. "I can tell him you're gone--or something. Do you want me to call Angela?" Zach was almost twittering in alarm.
"No, Zach. It's okay. Would you mind packing this skeleton back up?" Brennan knew it was better to just see Sully. Trying to avoid the situation was no good.
"Sure, Dr. Brennan. I'm sorry if I did something wrong by telling him to wait in your office."
She smiled at Zach's discomfiture. "No, you didn't. Really, Zach--it's okay."
When she reached her office, she saw Sully sitting at her desk, tapping a pencil rather quickly.
"Hi," she said simply.
He looked up and smiled briefly. "Hi, Tempe. I heard you had a 'rough morning'." He stood up and came to her, concern filling his eyes. "Are you okay?"
Brennan sighed. "Yes, I'm fine. How did you find out?"
"They brought a suspect in a while ago and I heard some of the guys talking about Booth questioning him. When I asked the one agent, he said Booth's partner had been in a run-in with the suspect earlier. I called here but no one was totally sure where you were. I got hold of Angela and she told me about it. I just wanted to see that you were okay." Sully took her hands in his and smiled gently.
"I'm okay. I got a little scratched up, that's all." She dropped his hands as she turned and moved to her desk.
He followed and stood, leaning against her desk. "So, have you given any thought to what I talked about the other night?"
"Yes. I don't know, Sully. It's a lot to ask: being on hold like that so much." She was tired and when she was tired, she tended to be more honest than normal. And she was really tired right now, especially after last night's tossing and turning from trying to process everything.
"Tempe, I know it's a lot to ask, but I wouldn't do it if I didn't think we were so good together before." He touched her face, gently brushing her hair back.
"Yes, we were good together. But it wasn't enough for you then, so why would it be enough now?" She was surprised at how he was pushing the issue.
"Why not give it a chance? Let's see what happens."
"I feel like you want me to be available when you're in DC and not mind you leaving whenever. That's not a relationship, Sully; that's a booty call," she replied, remembering Angela's words.
"I was hoping it would be enough to convince you to come with me so it wouldn't be that way," Sully replied earnestly.
Before she could reply, her phone rang and, glad for the distraction, she answered. "Hello?"
Sully stood up and walked over to her bookcase, perusing the many volumes she had on her shelves. It all looked fairly dry until he saw a few copies of her novels. Hearing Booth's name, Sully couldn't help but feel a little twinge of jealousy. She spent more time with him than anyone else. He flipped through the book he picked up from her shelf, just happening to land on a love scene between her two main characters. He cringed and flipped to the front of the book to see who was publishing her writing. He saw the dedication page and felt his throat tighten a bit. If they weren't an item, then she and Booth were either totally oblivious or totally insane. He flipped to the back of the book and a loose, folded page slipped out. Frowning, he unfolded it and saw her handwriting on it. Out of curiosity he read it over and felt his throat tighten even more. He glanced over at her, her back turned towards him as she continued to speak to Booth on the phone. Swallowing hard, he pocketed the piece of paper, closed the book, and returned it to its place on her shelf. He walked back over to her desk and picked up a picture of a little blonde-haired boy he'd never seen before.
She hung up the phone and turned back around to look at Sully. "Booth told me they got a full confession from both of the suspects. Each thought the other was giving him up, so they completely corroborated their stories."
"Does that mean you're safe?"
"Yes. Apparently, the body we found was one of their own. He was supposed to kill one of the House member's wives as a message. Apparently Representative Miller is spearheading an anti-drug campaign that starts in Colombia. One of the big cartels sent word to their American branch that they wanted Miller's wife killed as a warning. Our Juan Doe—Anthony Sanchez--was sent to do it, but couldn't bring himself to murder a woman so he backed out. Only thing is, he wasn't allowed to. The two guys in custody are novices coming in so they were told to kill Sanchez as a message to the rest of the gang. They did and when the body was discovered, they saw the news reports and were excited because it made them look good. They were given the go-ahead to pick another target, but it had to be a high profile woman, just to prove they wouldn't fail where Sanchez had. They saw me on the news and decided I'd do. That's how I got involved in this." Brennan shook her head. "I'm glad this is over."
Sully smiled. "I bet you are. So who's this?" Sully placed the picture back on her desk. "A nephew I didn't know about?"
"Actually, that's Parker…," she trailed off, feeling the awkwardness of the situation.
"Parker? Booth's son?"
"Yes. He insisted I have it. Booth has him calling me Bones, too," she laughed.
Sully nodded. "Tempe, I think I've caused you some grief that I never meant to." Here he straightened up.
Brennan frowned. "I don't know what you mean."
Sully smiled at her with what he hoped was an easy grin, even though inside he was ripped apart. "I think that every couple has a 'window of opportunity', if you will. It's the time period when they're perfectly matched and ready to move to the next level. It only stays open for a little bit and if they don't take that chance, it's lost and they can never get it back again." Sully came back around to her desk and held his hand out to her. She took it and he gently pulled her up to stand in front of him. "I hate to admit this, but I think our window has closed. Actually, I kind of get the feeling that maybe it was never really open in the first place."
Brennan frowned. "I still don't understand. You've changed your mind?"
Sully tried to manage another smile. "No, Tempe. But I think your heart is somewhere else. I should have realized it when I left--maybe I did, but I preferred to ignore it.
"I love you, Tempe. I have for a long time, but I didn't want to scare you away. I can say it now because I know it doesn't matter. I wish I was the one who has your heart, but wishing won't make it real. I'm going to say good-bye to you now. I doubt our paths will cross again, so I hope that if you think about me, it's with fondness." Sully leaned forward to place a gentle kiss on her lips and then couldn't help himself but to take her in his arms for a final embrace. When he let her go, he smiled one more time and went to the door.
Brennan was still in shock, not really understanding everything he had said about windows opening and closing. What had registered in her mind was when he told her he loved her and was leaving. When he turned around at the doorway for a split second, she thought that he had changed his mind and was going to stay.
"Tempe--I know you're unsure of yourself in relationships, but you might have to be the one who steps forward in this one. Don't let that window close on you and Booth. I want to know you're happy."
And with that, he was gone.
Almost immediately, Angela appeared in the doorway. "What was that?"
Brennan turned and looked at her friend. "I don't think I really know. He told me he loved me, said something about windows being open, and said good-bye."
"He told you he loves you? And then what? What did you say?" Angela asked.
She shook her head. "I didn't say anything. He said he had wanted to tell me before but was afraid of what I'd do. He told me now because he said it didn't matter any more."
Angela frowned. "Why doesn't it matter? What was the open window stuff he was talking about? And I heard him say it about you and Booth."
Brennan sighed and sank into a chair. "He said every relationship has a window of opportunity where a couple can either move forward or, I guess, close the window. Wouldn't a door be a better metaphor?"
Angela made a sound very near to a growl. "Sweetie, I love you, but you're really dense some times, you know? Sully obviously sees the same thing we all do. But he made a good point, even if you don't like the metaphor. You and Booth are going to reach a point where, if you don't act on what you're feeling, you're going to lose your chance. I have to give Sully a lot of credit for recognizing it and stepping aside. Now, what are you going to do?"
Brennan looked up in shock. "What am I going to do?" she repeated.
"Well, you obviously can't wait for Booth to make a move. Maybe he's confused. You do send mixed signals," Angela prodded.
"But it's Booth! He's my partner! What if it gets messed up? Look what's happened since he kissed me this morning! We're barely speaking," Brennan protested.
"That's because it happened under extenuating circumstances. You need to kiss him when there's no other strings attached. I mean, that is--if you really want to. Just how exactly do you feel about him?" Angela backtracked a bit. Of all the times she felt as though the two needed to get a room, she never really spoke seriously to her friend about her feelings.
"I don't know how to explain that. I've never felt this way about anyone before." Brennan was at a loss for words. There were so many things she felt and thought about him, she couldn't begin to sort them out. There was a definite sexual attraction, but there was so much more: companionship, understanding, forgiveness, humor, and perhaps most importantly, respect. Taking all of that in, what did it equal?
Angela had watched the emotions play over her friend's face. She knew what it was Brennan was feeling, but she couldn't be the one to explain it to her. Brennan had to figure it out for herself.
"Think about it, Bren. If it's something you want, maybe you should make the first move." Angela got up and went to the door. "It's getting late. Go home, have a glass or two of wine, relax--and think everything through. Give me a call if you make any decisions." And with that, her friend left Brennan to her thoughts.
Booth was rubbing his eyes and stretching when Sully walked into his office. He couldn't have been more wary if a rattlesnake had suddenly appeared.
"Sully. What can I do for you?" Booth asked, pushing his chair back from his desk and sub-consciously flashing his belt buckle du jour. He motioned to a chair on the other side of his desk, but Sully shook his head.
"Thanks, but no. Booth, I'm here to do something for you," Sully replied.
Booth frowned. "I don't know what you mean."
Sully snorted. "Now you're sounding like Tempe!" He reached into his jacket pocket and pulled out a folded paper. "Are you planning on telling her how you feel about her? I mean, any time soon?"
Booth sat forward. "Are you saying what I think you're saying?" His tone of voice sounded a little on edge.
"Spare me, Booth. You don't need to bluster around me. You need to do something about this. If you don't step up now, it's going to be too late. I'm leaving after this case is done. I'm out of the picture because I know how she feels about you--I've always known. But you're either too blind or too stupid to realize it. Guess what? You keep playing this 'safe game', and someone is going to enter the picture and not leave. And you'll have no one to blame but yourself." Sully was brutally honest.
"Look--I don't know where you think you get off saying this stuff to me, but you better back off." Booth was not amused.
"No, I'm not backing off, Booth! I love her too much to give up on this! You have to listen to me!" Sully was angry.
At hearing him proclaim his love for her, Booth stopped short. "Why are you here?"
"I told you. I'm leaving soon--and not because I want to. It's because I love her and want her to be happy that I'm backing off. It's not me she wants, Booth," he replied, looking pointedly at him.
"You don't know what she wants. Did she tell you?" Booth was in denial, but at the same time holding out hope that he was indeed leaving.
"No. She didn't tell me. She told you." Sully tossed the paper in his hand onto Booth's desk. "She doesn't know I found it and I know I'm probably crossing a line, but you need to know this. What you do with the information is up to you, but at least I know I've tried to ensure her happiness. God knows, that's all I want for her. And since I can't be the one who makes her happy, I'm trying to get the one person who does to step up."
Booth looked at the paper on his desk. "What is this?"
"Something you need to read," Sully said simply, turning to leave. As he reached the door, he said, without turning around, "Treat her right." And with that, he was gone.
Booth frowned, watching after him. That had to be the most surprising conversation he'd had in a long time. He looked at the paper again and finally picked it up, opening it slowly. He recognized Bones' handwriting right away, even though it seemed more cramped that usual. He saw it was a letter addressed to him and leaned forward to read it.
Booth,
There's so much I've wanted to say to you, but have never really had the words to do so. Now, with so little time left, I'm angry with myself. I realize I've wasted so many chances--chances that I will probably never get again. So I'm sorry you're reading this instead of hearing it directly from me. But at least now you'll know.
Booth paused in his reading and looked up. Jesus, this had been written while she was trapped by the Grave Digger! She'd written this thinking it would be the last thing anyone would ever hear from her. What's more, with all the people she cared about, she'd written it to him. He felt as though he should stop reading it, but the good Catholic boy caved to the temptation and he looked back down at it.
These last two years have been the most meaningful of my life and I have you to thank for that. You've given me a purpose. More than that, you've been a friend, confidant, and shoulder to lean on. You've never let me down--unlike so many others in my life. I think you know that and I don't want you blaming yourself for not finding Jack and me in time. Just knowing you were trying made us determined to do as much as we could to help.
I have only one regret. I've felt so close to you--like we're truly partners in every sense of the word--that I only wish I'd had the courage to tell you this face to face. I've never had much experience with feelings like this, but I can recognize that the way I feel about you is far beyond anything I've ever felt for anyone. I regret that we never shared a kiss, that I never shared your bed, that I never said 'I love you'.
Bones
Booth read and re-read the last paragraph. Each time he read the last sentence, he felt more and more overwhelmed. "Oh my God," he whispered aloud. He sat staring at it for what seemed like hours, so many things going through his mind he couldn't focus on any one thing. The only sound he could hear was his own breathing as he kept staring at the paper. Then, standing up, he grabbed his jacket and left.
