Eddy: Are you ready for...
Edd & Eddy: MORTAL KOMBAT!
Edd: I sure am ready for it. One question however, why is she here?
Buttercup: What? Now I can't play games with you guys?
Eddy: Oh yeah. Buttercup is currently confused about her sexuality in her college days and is currently into all the boy stuff, you know like the blood and gore of Mortal Kombat. So... There you go.
Buttercup: Yeah that would explain why I'm with you.
Eddy: What? What did you say?
Buttercup: Oh nothing.
On character selection with Edd and Eddy playing two player selecting their characters.
Eddy: I'm going to pick...
Buttercup: Raiden!
Eddy: Not Riaden.
Buttercup: You son of a...!
Eddy: Barka. One, because he has Wolverine blades. And two, he is pure evil... Just like our current President. BAM!
Buttercup: That's real good Eddy, but you still need a partner!
Eddy: I know that! You think I don't know that, but I do.
Buttercup: Just pick somebody already!
Eddy: You want me to pick someone!? Here ya go b***h! I pick f***ing Reptile!
Edd: Doesn't anyone want to know who I'm picking?
Eddy & Buttercup: Shut up!
Edd: Fine! I was just going to pick both of the Sub-Zero's anyways.
Eddy: Oh that's real brilliant. Pick two of the same guy why don't you?
Buttercup: When's my turn?
Eddy: When one of us dies! Now silence yourself... Dog!
Buttercup: You did not just call me a dog you...
The fight begins with Baraka vs Normal Sub-Zero.
Edd & Eddy: Fight!
Edd: Check this out. I'm going to freez your ass and then stick an icicle up it so far you won't sit right for a week.
Buttercup: Thats funny, I always thought that Eddy was the butch of the relationship.
Eddy: Oh that's so funny because that's the name of your clone so what does that make you?
Buttercup: The OG motherlucker.
Edd: Yeah, now you've been replaced by Scootaloo from MLP.
Eddy: Ooohhh, snap!
Buttercup: Don't make me get the Kanker sisters!
Eddy: What ever. Don't you have a boy clone of yourself to go get knockedup by?
Buttercup: I'd never let you even get to first base.
Eddy: I wasn't talking about me!
Buttercup: I know.
Now Reptile vs Cyber Sub-Zero.
Edd: You know the only thing cooler then Sub-Zero? Cyber Sub-Zero!
Eddy: Yeah he would need an upgrade.
Edd: What's that supposed to mean?
Eddy: It means he sucks. Just look at the main menu. They have Scorpion beating the s**** out of him.
Edd: They Lie!
Reptile wins by using his grapple attack and Eddy preforms the fatality.
Edd: No, don't vomit in my none existing mouth.
Eddy: Begging won't help. Hey Buttercup, look familure? Him taking a big mouth full of that nasty goo.
Buttercup:... Double D, give me that controller.
Edd: Destroy him Buttercup. Make him hurt.
Buttercup: Yeah, I want to make him cry.
Eddy: Oh bring it you stone cold b****!
Buttercup: It's on! You're going down!
Now Eddy vs Butercup. Both are back on the character select screen to pick their team.
Eddy: Oh, hey Buttercup! You know how Raiden is your favorite character? Well now I'm going to use him to destroy you with. Suck on that.
Buttercup: I will ram my thumb through your eye socket you little b****!
Eddy: What's that? You don't want me to pick your second fav, Smoke? Too bad for you then, huh? I'm going to destroy you with your heroes. What now?
Buttercup: I'm going use the only characters not from MK.
Eddy: You don't mean...
Buttercup: Yes. Kratos and Freddy Kruger motherf****!
Edd: Why is Freddy in there anyways?
Eddy: I know right! Both owned by the same company that owns DC and they couldn't like add Green Lantern instead of the horror icon that has the least kills out of all of them.
Edd: I want Ash Williams in it!
Eddy: Yeah!
Buttercup: That would be kickass.
Eddy: Enough talk, let's fight!
Begins with Raiden vs Kratos.
Eddy: Your Conan the Barbarian rip off doesn't stand a chance against the OG God of thunder.
Buttercup: He is so not the OG! We all saw that DeathBattle with him and Thor.
Eddy: So you admit he sucks?
Buttercup:... I... Shut up and play the damn game!
Eddy: Some ones angry.
Buttercup: And some ones going to bed unsatisfied tonight.
Eddy: Happens either way babe.
Edd: TMI guys.
Eddy: Ah! I forgot you were there.
Edd: I just moved over a seat.
Eddy: I know that but you did it with the grace of a ninja.
Buttercup: Double D is the last person to pop into my head when I think ninja.
Edd: Hey! I'm on your side.
Buttercup: I'm just stating my opinion.
Eddy: That's the freedom of America Double D.
Edd: I know that! I'm the one who taught you that!
Eddy: Silence yourself commy!
Now Smoke vs Freddy.
Eddy: Takes this Kruger, you deep fried Phantasam knockoff!
Buttercup: He's OG.
Edd: Not really Phantasam came before Halloween was made.
Buttercup: Why must you use facts to make me look like a fool?
Edd: I'm only stating my opinion.
Buttercup: I will have Brick plant his seed in Blossom if you don't shut the hell up Double D.
Edd: I'll be good.
Eddy: Don't give into her threats Double D. We're Americans we don't negotiate with Terroists.
Edd: Yeah but Eddy, the terroroists aren't able to left a two story building over your head.
Eddy: So! Ed dropped a two story building on yours when you were only like three, and you bounced back.
Edd: He what?
Eddy: Oh nothing.
Buttercup wins with Kratos and preforms the fatality on Raiden.
Eddy: No! It's not right for a girl to beat a boy in a video game.
Buttercup: Oh Raiden, this is not the side of the fatality I wanted you to be on when I play this game.
Edd: Kratos is the last of the OG's.
Eddy: Rest in peace sweet prince.
All take a moment of silence.
Eddy: So let's play the live network.
Edd: Okay.
Buttercup: I love competition.
Edd: Yes, Kevin and the rest of the college's football team would know that first hand.
Buttercup: Hey I'm not the frilly cheerleader type like Blossom and Bubbles.
Eddy: Oh Blossom and Bubbles are so hot in those uniforms.
Buttercup: Right, so how do you want to die?
Eddy: It's only an opinion babe.
Buttercup: I kind of want to kill you by the head, see if any brains spill out.
Eddy: Everyone else thinks it.
Buttercup: But I also want to know if you have any guts that would spill out.
Eddy: If you wore the uniform I'm certain it would work for you too.
Fighting others online. First competitor is Noob Saiden vs Them as Jax.
Eddy: You can't beat Jax, he's like 100% American.
Buttercup: And he's got those big robot arms.
Eddy: That's American engineering BC.
They win and Jax does his victory stance.
All: America!
Now they are reading their inbox.
Edd: Oh look that guy has 'inator' in his username. Add him as a friend, anyone with 'inator' in their username is our friend.
Eddy: Agreed.
Buttercup: I don't approve.
Eddy: Yeah we'll it's a good thing your not apart of the Two Best Eds, huh?
Edd: Oh check it this guy wants to fight us.
Eddy: Killinator. Why should we fight him when we got the whole world to choose from.
Edd: He claims he has something that'll blow our minds.
Eddy:... Alright. Pick Kratos and accept his challenge.
They except his challenge and see what the surprise was. The guy unlocked Goro and found away to play as him without his clothes on.
Everyone: WHOA!
Edd: I don't want to fight him any more. What if I loose?
Eddy: You accepted the challenge now get in there and fight that Four armed and three legged giant, inbred, mutant of fictional nature.
Edd: I can't, you take it. I can't live with dying by those four hands. I know where they've been.
Eddy: Will you shut it? We are not going to loose to this guy alright. We have the God of War on our side and he has just a streaking mutant.
They win the first match.
Eddy: There see, we're winning.
Edd: I'm trying not to look.
Buttercup: Yeah well I'm trying to see for as long as I can. It's the only real one I've seen for awhile.
Eddy: All the more reason he must die.
They loose the second round.
Eddy:...
Buttercup: You were saying?
Eddy: Don't even start.
Finally loose the second round.
Edd: See! I told you!
Buttercup: How does the sting of defeat feel?
Eddy: Well... Not good babe. It doesn't sting as bad as my eyesight for having to see that whole thing, but it still burns.
Edd: Just like after the both of you pee, huh.
Eddy & Buttercup Both look at Edd.
Edd: See you all next chapter!
