As I heard the wizard said he is here I almost fall to my knees, if Fili wouldn't be there to catch me. He looked at me distressed, but I gave him a weak smile and said.
"Just the dance...and maybe a little bit of the wine." I winked as all dwarves headed to the front door right after Gandalf. Fili nodded then jumped down from the table and hold his hands out to me. I stepped till I reached the edge of the table when he grabbed my waist and lifted me from my former place to put me on the ground.
"Thank you Fili!" I smirked at him.
"No problem Blossom!" He teased me with my other nickname and I gawked at him with raised eyebrows.
"Why?..I prefer this one better than the other, elven name of yours." He laughed and went after the others. I shook my head in disbelief and giggled, when I heard a very familiar deep baritone from the hall. Slowly I managed to soothe my nerves and got behind Bombur whose back covered me fully so I could take a closer look. I peeked out from behind the fat dwarf and stared in front of me. I haven't noticed that I hold my breath while my eyes lingered on his features. I gasped as I saw the certain blue eyes, short beard, and raven black hair which has some silver lines in them by now. Besides he was the same dwarf I kissed so many years ago. I didn't regret it, but the fact that I saw him with another one kissing right after ours, gave a bitter taste to that memory. His distaste to our burglar pulled me back to the present.
"Thought as much. He looks more like a grocer than a burglar." I snorted at his statement, but I wished I haven't, as the dwarf leader's piercing blue eyes searched for mine. He came closer to where I stood and pushed Bombur out of his way. I wanted to shrink into the corner, when he gazed at me with his mouth agape. I rashly looked into Gandalf's direction to meet his gaze questioningly, but he looked as concerned as me. Ever so slowly I straighten myself before him and took one step closer. His eyes bore into mine as if he couldn't believed for his own. All the group could feel the tension between us, but only few understood the seriousness of the situation. I got a glimpse of his movement to take a chance by touching me just before he rushed himself into action, but didn't have the courage to make it.
"You..." He started as if it was a question, a statement, or almost a plea, but I continued for him, before he would complicate things for me.
"I'm Nimril."I introduced myself, when the wizard hurried next to me.
"Our fifteenth company!" He stated, and Thorin stared between the two of us in disbelief. My elven name appears to him, and his features hardened right after my introduction. So his hatred for elves hadn't changed a bit. Gandalf sensed his mood change and rushed his explanation over my presence. "I've told you that you need a burglar, and ...well..." He looked back at me with a half smile."...more of her!" He gestured with his left hand over me. But before he could say more, Thorin blurted in.
"You think that I would need an elven maid for my quest?" He growled. My rage burned once more, as I noticed that he lost his interest in me caused by my elven name and stared into Gandalf's eyes for answer. At least he didn't recognized me, or I hoped he didn't.
"I take it as a compliment from you... for thinking that I'm such a beauty as they are,..." I started to say and winked at him."... except for the pointy ears,..." I continued and point on my ears in evidence."... and my height which you must also recognized. However I'm not an elf, although my name is elven." I said but couldn't resist and smirked. I could hear low gasps around me, from the others over my open bluntness towards their leader but I ignored them and still held Thorin's angered gaze. Certainly no woman has ever dare to talk to him like that. I didn't care, he is still a smug autocrat as he used to be. Gandalf tried to stand in front of me to cover my wicked grin.
"There is more impotent things to discuss Thorin. Let her humor not bother you, you get used to it." He said.
"I doubt that." He spat, and stared at me in confusion before Gandalf lad him in the kitchen. I started to follow them when Dwalin catch me by my shoulder.
"What was that lass?!" He asked in a stern voice like I was his student again. I shrugged and blurted out.
"I hate people with prejudice." I said simply to my old mentor.
"And what have you just done right before?" Suddenly my face fall after what he said. He was right. I wasn't any better, maybe he hurt me in the past, but this mission is nothing to do with it. I lift my eyes to his careworn features. "At least show some respect to our king,... he've seen a lot." He finished and patted my back as I nodded. He is a king now, I asked to myself. What happened here while I was gone? I rushed after them to hear something, anything about their situation. Thorin sat at the end of the table with his back on me. I didn't want to interrupt their conversation so I just leaned against the wall next to me with my arms crossed before my chest and listened to it.
"They will not come." Thorin said disappointedly and the others joined him with the same feelings while murmuring amongst themselves. "They say this quest is ours, and ours alone."
"You're going on a quest?" Bilbo chimed in curiously. I haven't noticed he got next to me.
"Bilbo, my dear fellow, let us have a little more light." Gandalf asked our host, while he put some old map on the table before Thorin. His large back covered the view so I stepped a little closer to get a better look.
"Far to the East, over ranges and rivers, beyond woodlands and wastelands, lies a single solitary peak." Gandalf said.
"The Lonely Mountain." Bilbo said to himself when he read the map.
"Erebor!" I gasped when I recognized the home of the dwarves as I got closer to the map and to Thorin himself. I haven't sensed his eyes on me until I met his intense look.
"Surely I can read as well!" I said with a puzzled smile on my face. He just gawk further at me.
"Unfortunately the name of our kingdom is not on this map as I've noticed, is it elf?" He asked me mistrustful as my eyes got wide from my mistake. Now what, I thought to myself apprehensively. All the others looked uncomprehendingly at me as well.
"Every race knows about the greatest kingdom of the dwarves, including me." Some dwarves nodded with agreement, but the others weren't satisfied with my answer like their king, but they left the matter for now.
"Aye. Oin has read the portents, and the portents say it is time." Gloin stated.
"Ravens have been seen flying back to the mountain as it was foretold: When the birds of yore return to Erebor, the reign of the beast will end." Oin continued. Bilbo looked concerned after the mention of some beast.
"Uh, What beast?" He asked with interest.
"Well that would be a reference to Smaug the Terrible, chiefest and greatest calamity of our age. Airborne fire-breather, teeth like razors, claws like meathooks, extremely fond of precious metals-"
"Yes, I know what a dragon is." Bilbo said with a hurt expression and met my sympathetic look.
"I'm not afraid! I'm up for it. I'll give him a taste of the Dwarfish iron right up his jacksie." One young dwarf said loudly, which made the whole company buzz in union.
"Sit down!" Dori pulled his brother down once again, when Balin started to share his opinion.
"The task would be difficult enough with an army behind us. But we number just thirteen, and not thirteen of the best, nor brightest." The dwarves started objecting. I shook my head for their lack of table manners,and got a glimpse of Thorin's weary expression before I turned to the others again to catch Kili's last sentence.
"...Gandalf will have killed hundreds of dragons in his time." He cheered, while the old wizard got a bit pale after his statement.
"Oh, well, now, uh, I-I-I wouldn't say that, I- -" I must laughed at that, but as soon as I did Thorin growled something in khuzdul to me, and I apologized.
"Sorry." And I lowered my gaze to the ground.
"How many, then?" Dori asked suddenly. Gandalf looked confused.
"Uh, what?" He asked, and I just restrain my laughs after his question. It was so ridiculous. Thorin didn't gave a word again for my behaviour but I saw him to take a deep sigh.
"Well, how many dragons have you killed?" Oh God! He wouldn't give up that issue easily.
Gandalf embarrassedly choked on his pipe as the dwarves jump to their feet, arguing about the number of dragons Gandalf has killed. Thorin jumped up in anger and bellowed, silencing the rest.
"Shazara! If we have read these signs, do you not think others will have read them too? Rumours have begun to spread. The dragon Smaug has not been seen for 60 years. Eyes look east to the Mountain, assessing, wondering, weighing the risk. Perhaps the vast wealth of our people now lies unprotected. Do we sit back while others claim what is rightfully ours? Or do we seize this chance to take back Erebor? Du Bekâr! Du Bekâr!" He finished and all the dwarf started to cheer loudly. Before Balin interrupt the merriments.
"You forget: the front gate is sealed. There is no way into the mountain."
"That, my dear Balin, is not entirely true." Said the wizard and twiddling his fingers,to produce a dwarvish key, ornately wrought. Thorin looked at it in wonder
"How came you by this?" But his voice was merely a whisper.
"It was given to me by your father, by Thrain, for safekeeping. It is yours now." Gandalf said and handed the key to Thorin.
"If there is a key, there must be a door."Fili chimed in.
"These runes speak of a hidden passage to the lower halls." Gandalf pointed at some runes on the map with his pipe.
"There's another way in!"Kili cheered, but Gandalf calmed him immediatly.
"Well, if we can find it, but dwarf doors are invisible when closed. The answer lies hidden somewhere in this map and I do not have the skill to find it. But there are others in Middle-earth who can. The task I have in mind will require a great deal of stealth, and no small amount of courage. But, if we are careful and clever, I believe that it can be done." All of a sudden Ori blurted out understanding Bilbo's importance.
"That's why we need a burglar."
"Hm, A good one, too. An expert, I'd imagine." Surely he didn't recognized his situation. Poor fellow. Honestly I started to pitied the hobbit.
"And are you?" Gloin asked him right away.
"Am I what?" Bilbo asked.
"He said he's an expert! Hey hey!" I smacked my forehead with my palm. Oin must missheared the words and so he achieved the whole room to burst out in laughter over Bilbo's features.
"M-Me? No, no, no, no, no. I'm not a burglar; I've never stolen a thing in my life." He said trying to save himself.
"I'm afraid I have to agree with Mr. Baggins. He's hardly burglar material." Bilbo nods in agreement with Balin's statement.
"Aye, the wild is no place for gentlefolk who can neither fight nor fend for themselves." Dwalin added and he pointed his fingers to the hobbit when Thorin looked me in the eye as well.
"Hey..." I yelled seeing his disdainful look. "I can take care of myself more than you think!" I said with anger and stamped with my foot. Thorin just smirked at my childish act and turned his back at me.
"We don't deal with children." He chuckled along with some of his companions. His words got my blood boiled in my veins, like it did when he denied me back at his bedchambers so many years ago.
"So we're on the same topic again. You haven't changed a bit." I shouted when abruptly he turned his gaze at me with fury and stood before me. I managed to gave myself again twice during the day. I stared him in shock whether he noticed it or not as I started to think of an excuse for my words.
"Explain yourself!" He growled at me and his gaze was full of rage and suspicion.
"Well...I mean you handled me as child back in the hall as I have noticed from your behavior earlier and still you do the same now." I said in one blink and glimpsed at Gandalf who took a relieving sigh and gave me an approving nod. Thorin noticed my glimpse and turned his head towards the wizard who seemed very occupied with his pipe in his hand. Thorin just snorted at me.
"Maybe you deserved it..." He stared back at me and I started to protest when he looked back at Gandalf again. " Anyway who is this woman?
"I've told you once that I have my own duty during your journey and will not be accompany you all along, so that is the reason of her presence." He said simply.
"We don't need distraction during our journey, and surely they would be a great burden to bear." The leader argued and I saw that Bilbo continues nodding in agreement so the dwarves begun arguing again. Some like Fili and Kili were beside me but I couldn't tell that for the other members. Gandalf, grown angry rise to his full height and casts darkness over the group as started to speak in his menacing voice. The others stopped in awe immediately.
"Enough! If I say Bilbo Baggins is a burglar, then a burglar he is, for which he is highly desirable for achieving this quest's goal along with Nimril" He finished and gone back to his normal self. "Hobbits are remarkably light on their feet. In fact, they can pass unseen by most if they choose. And while the dragon is accustomed to the smell of dwarf, the scent of hobbit is all but unknown to him, which gives us a distinct advantage. You asked me to find the fourteenth member of this company, and I have chosen Mr. Baggins and this woman to accompany you as the fifteenth member. There's a lot more to him and of course to her than appearances suggest, and they got a great deal more to offer than any of you know, including themselves. About Blossom's ..I mean Nimril's presence you must trust me with." Thorin looked confused for my other name used by my old friend as if he noticed something familiar, but didn't say a word about it.
"Very well. We will do it your way." Thorin nodded with acceptance.
"No, no, no." Bilbo started to say.
"Give him the contract." Thorin said to Balin and added quickly." Make one for the woman as well!" He finished.
"Great...I'm the woman now!" I whined, shook my head, and almost missed as the dwarf lord stepped in front of me with his arms crossed over his chest.
"Another word from you tonight, complaining... and you'll be walking on foot during the whole journey!" He demanded, but when he saw my fox eyes blurred with unshed tears his features softened a bit and he get confused.
"Fine!" I said in a dead voice and left the house while, I missed the hurt features of the king. I needed some fresh air to think properly and being near to Thorin didn't help. Out in front of the kitchen window their conversations were still audibly.
"Please." I heard Mr. Baggins low voice.
"It's just the usual summary of out-of-pocket expenses, time required, remuneration, funeral arrangements, so forth." I heard Balin informed him.
"Funeral arrangements?" Now that was interesting. Am I going to get a similar contract, I asked myself.
"Terms: Cash on delivery, up to but not exceeding one fourteenth of total profit, if any. Seems fair. Eh, Present company shall not be liable for injuries inflicted by or sustained as a consequence thereof including but not limited to lacerations ... evisceration … incineration?" Bilbo gasped loudly.
"Oh, aye, he'll melt the flesh off your bones in the blink of an eye." Well that information would help me gain my strength for the road.I thought sarcastically, when Balin's voice caught my attention.
"You all right, laddie?"
"Uh, yeah...Feel a bit faint." Bilbo mumbled.
"Think furnace with wings." Bofur couldn't just stop. "Flash of light, searing pain, then Poof! you're nothing more than a pile of ash."
"Air, I-I-I need air." ..."Hmmm. Nope." I heard the hobbit said just before I heard someone thumped on the floor.
"Ah, very helpful, Bofur." Gandalf growled. And that was it, I heard enough of this. I strode to the small bench where we sat with Gandalf and lowered myself on it. I was tired and confused. This place's existence was a heavy load on my shoulders. I worked so hard through these years to forgot all of this, and here was I arguing with my childhood love object, again. How am I going to explain it to my therapist, and moreover to Marc. Oh Marc. I sighd and brushed my thumb over my engagement ring on my right ring finger. I missed him. I missed the peace and the simple things back at home. But I also missed beeing here. I was completly torn between the two worlds. I heard a small gathering in another room as I tried to lock out the outside world, when I heard the door opening. I didn't have to turn to know who sat next to me.
"It is a nice weather outside, although it would rain soon!" Balin pointed out. When he didn't received an answer he sighed and lowered his eyes from the sky to meet my emerald ones. He leaned closer with eyes still fixed on me when he smiled. "And just when I thought that I would never see you again lass!"He chuckled to himself." I stared at him in wonder with raised eyebrows. "You know I've never seen him in such a fury in long years...even the lads couldn't do that to him." He smirked at the mention of Thorin's nephews, and I looked at him in confusion.
"Sorry, but I don't know what you're talking about..." I looked at him in awe while I feared to be unmasked, but he ignored my words.
" Only when you flew off..." He continued sadly as his old eyes searched for mine." Mimur!" At the mention of Thorin's nickname for me I gaped and covered my mouth to drown my squeal. My hand was trembling when he reached out for the one which covering my mouth and took it in his.
"Oh! Balin...how did you know?" I cried out quietly. He gave me a sad half smile.
"Maybe I'm old, but still have sharp eyes. You have the same beautiful green orbs when I last saw you. But that wasn't what gave you away...It was you spirit. There are no human, nor elven maid who dare to speak her mind so freely to him like you did back there. You are as stubborn as a dwarf, lass. When you two argued I could see fire in you, and as for Thorin... well he was more alive than ever in sixty years." His words warmed my very soul.
"Sixty years...it has been sixty years!" I said in wonder. "I believed it to be less." I said honestly and searched for his sorrowful eyes. "My dear Balin...What happened while I was away?" I asked gently and saw a single teardrop left his eye. He looked at me with so mach emotion on his features that I leaned in and hugged him tightly for support. We spoke for almost two hours alone outside. He told me about, the dragon, the lost of Erebor and how everything has changed during my absence. I felt anger, sorrow, pain, loss like he did before. This is not the Middle-Earth I left so long ago. I wanted to scream as I heard my true friend Frerin died in the Battle of Azanulbizar. Everything what were dear for me was gone. Almost, as I thought to myself and turned to the house as it was translucent to find Thorin. He was not the same as I have changed as well. Probably it wouldn't have worked for us back then. I put my face in my palms and cried for the ones who were now gone. Balin patted my back with compassion when the door opened and the dwarf king's head poked out.
"Balin you are needed inside." He said simply and didn't forget to give me a hard glance before he disappeared inside leaving the door opened for my old mentor. He brushed my cheeks before he took his leave. I could here the others gathered in Bilbo's living room and after some conversations they fell silent. I was eager to know what were they up to so I approached the window when a deep humming filled the room. Right after that I recognized Thorin's deep baritone as he started to sing.
"Far over the misty mountains cold
To dungeons deep and caverns old
We must away ere break of day
To find our long-forgotten gold" The others joined him on the second stanza.
"The pines were roaring on the height
The winds were moaning in the night
The fire was red, it flaming spread
The trees like torches blazed with light" I heard as they finished. Thorin's voice was so full of emotions that it caught me off guard. I laid down on the bench and stared into the deep blue sky. I haven't realized I started to hum the same melody from inside when someone sneaked up on me.
"You should get inside, it's chilly to be out here." A deep voice stated as I jumped out from my previous position just to met the leader's smirking face. Obviously he thought I was funny with my frightened face.
"Oh my! Thorin, you shouldn't sneak up on someone like that!" I shrieked. He managed to hide a chuckle at my reaction and looked at me with concern. When I noticed his expression I gave him a week smile.
"What's the matter?" He didn't thought I would ask such question and raised his eyebrows.
"You!" I shivered as he got closer and looked at me with unreadable emotions on his face. I stood up from the bench to make some distance between us but my knees gave up for being there too long and started to fall when his strong arms caught me. My heartbeat started to quicken at his touch when it did when I was 16. He straightened me with his still holding arms but didn't let me go. We lingered there holding each others gaze while his panting were audible even fo me. A loud smack around the door warned us that probably were not alone when I heard Kili's confused voice.
"Uncle,..what are you two doing out there?" He asked as I met his and Fili's mischievous grin. I heard Thorin growl something to them in khuzdul, as I grabbed his shoulder for support and get off one of my shoes just to throw it in their direction.
"Don't you dare spying! Haven't you heard what would happen to someone with such curiosity as yours?...I shouted after the two lads as they escaped my wrath."...they got old!" I finished and turned my attention back to the dwarf whose arms were still around my waist just to notice in time that his eyes glinted with joy.
"Woman,... your wrath will be great burden to us all!" He teased with one of his half smiles. It almost melted my heart, but I smacked myself mentally and tried to escape from his hold.
"Such as your stubbornness." I striked back. He glared at me and grabbed my shoulders with rage.
"Careful with your tongue lass! Maybe Gandalf stands by you, but as the leader of the company I have hardly accepted your need amongst us. As one of the week links of the company you must be trained during our journey." He warned me. I shook his hands off and stepped back.
"As you wish!... Majesty!" I said sarcastically as I gave him a slight bow and left him alone. When I reached the opened door I turned to watch him still with his back on me as he stood there, lifting his gaze to the sky and said to himself. "Mahal help me!" He sighed. I must smirked at that and got inside. I've noticed the great mess the dwarfes made back here so I rolled my sleeves once more and headed to the kitchen to start cleaning up. At least that will help to occupy my mind for now.
