Summary: Rory left Stars Hollow in July to go report on Barack Obama's presidency tour

Chapter 5

Disclaimer: I still own nothing!

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He awoke with a cry as the sun invaded his eyes. He threw a pillow over his head and mumbled unhappily about the sun and alcohol. He had never been much of a morning person, as Logan and Colin liked to point out on many occasions. If there was one thing Finn knew how to do, it was drink and drink well. However, his excursions with alcohol either got someone arrested, got someone punched or ended up resulting in many excruciating headaches in the morning. He heard a crash coming from his living room but he didn't move from the bedroom, Colin had probably stumbled into his apartment late that night, he and Logan both had their own keys and whenever Colin and Steph got into a fight, which was often, he would crash at Finn's. After the second crash and someone cursing, loudly, he decided to drag himself out of bed and attack Colin with something sharp and potentially life threatening. When he stumbled out of the bedroom and into the living room, he was astonished at what he saw in front of him.

Logan was sitting on his couch, nursing a bottle of vodka with several empty bottles next to him; it seemed as if the loud crashing noises had been Logan throwing them at the wall. Finn blinked rapidly, he wondered if maybe someone had spiked his drink last night and he was hallucinating, but there were no purple cows this time so he must be sober. He slowly approached Logan and flopped down on the couch next to him, grabbing one of the bottles and drinking it like water. Logan looked over at him briefly and Finn was astonished at what he was seeing.

Logan Huntzberger had been crying.

Logan.

Crying.

The apocalypse had arrived.

He remembered, not so fondly, the one occasion when he himself had cried, and Logan making fun of him about it. If he remembered correctly, it was when he was seeing the purple cows…

"Blimey mate, the purple cows are crowding you!" Finn slurred drunkenly as he stumbled across the pub, practically falling into Colin's lap as he reached the table they were sitting at.

"What the hell are you talking about now" Colin grumbled as Finn flopped around in his lap, trying to slide himself in the seat next to him. Finally, getting annoyed with Finn flopping around, he pushed him into the seat next to him and the aussie somehow managed to end up with his feet on the chair and the rest of his body on the ground, laughing hysterically.

"No Colin! I can't sit there! Bessie wouldn't appreciate it. Oh Bessie, don't say those things. I am not ugly, Bessie how could you! Why would you say that! I love you! WHAT? YOU DON'T LOVE ME? BUT YOU ARE A GREAT LAY LOVE, I LOVE YOU MY BAUTIFUL PURPLE COW DARLING" Finn slurred as he started openly sobbing while rolling around on the floor.

"Finn, there is no purple cow" Logan deadpanned as he walked past his friend who was still on the floor.

"Yes there is, she's right there mate" Finn pointed to the seat next to Colin, which was currently occupied by Rory.

"I'm RORY" she said, slowly enunciating her name, giving him the strangest look ever. "And I'm pretty sure I'm not purple" she said with an eyebrow raise.

All the details of that night were hazy at best, but he did remember that sometime around there, Logan had made fun of him. But his friend was obviously hurting, and if he had to guess it was probably about Rory. It always was.

"What's wrong mate?" He asked, wondering if Logan was even sober enough to answer him.

"She moved on" He said quietly as he took another drink of the liquid in his hands. Finn didn't really know what to say, he found it strange that Logan would know that Rory had moved on when she hadn't even been in town ever since graduation, well that he knew of anyway.

"And you know this how?" He asked

"I saw her yesterday" Logan slurred, the alcohol affected his speech so greatly that Finn had to really concentrate to hear what he was saying. "She was with him, poet boy"

"Uh" Finn didn't have any idea as to who 'poet boy' was, but he had to guess that it was either a friend of Rory's or an old boyfriend or something, it had to be for Logan to get so upset.

"They were walking together, his arm was around her. Like we used to" he slurred, getting angrier by the minute. He threw the bottle that he was drinking out of at the wall and Finn winced as it connected with its target.

When Logan was this far gone, there was only one thing to get him back from it…and she wasn't around anymore.

--

When Rory woke up she realized instantly that she wasn't in her own bed, and then it hit her. She was in Jess' bed; she had slept with Jess Mariano.

When they had been dating, she had often imagined her first time being with him, but when he left her to go to California, all of her images of them being together for her first time had been removed in the blink of an eye. Frankly, she didn't think that she would ever see him again but of course he kept popping back up, that's what he always did, pop up at the most inconvenient times.

Except now, now he had popped up when she actually needed him, when she actually had room for him in her life. It was strange, she and Jess had always had a very imperfect relationship, and it had always been morally wrong for them to start things because of 'circumstances' or she had a boyfriend, or he had a girlfriend. Things just never seemed to work out because of where they were in their lives. But now, here they were. She had just graduated and lost her first job, not sure where she was going to go from here, and he was sufficiently successful, he had two novels out and had just opened a book store in New York since the publishing house had really taken out. They were finally at the point in their lives when it would be okay to see each other, they wouldn't have towns against them, boyfriends or girlfriends to get in the way, impending 'futures' or any of the other shit that had stopped them in the past.

She thought back to the conversation they had had last night, or rather this morning, about their lives...

"I have a cat" he said out of nowhere, startling her a little for nothing had been said for a short amount of time.

"Uh okay" she said, sounding slightly confused, wondering where the conversation was heading.

"Yeah I thought that I should probably let you know, just in case he jumps up on the bed sometime during the night" she couldn't help but laugh as she imagined Jess sleeping in his bed with the cat curled up next to him.

"Let me guess what you named him, Ernest?" She replied, taking yet another crack at his favorite author.

"Nah, Dodger" he replied, looking away from her and towards the window, everytime something from their past came up, he always seemed to shy away from it.

"Does it make you uncomfortable?" she asked, picking up on his awkwardness towards talking about the past.

"Not really, it just wasn't most of my shining moments, you know? I was really immature and mean to you, a lot. I don't like thinking about that now because if I knew then what I knew now, I never would have done half of the things I did."

"Like what?" she whispered quietly.

"Kyle's party. I shouldn't have fought Dean." He whispered quietly, taking her hair and pushing it back behind her ear. "…and leaving you, without telling you anything. I just packed my stuff and got on a bus, and then I had the nerve to tell you I'd call when I KNEW I wouldn't. I hated myself for a really long time after that, I never really got over it, you know? I mean, I had no reason to be upset; I was the one that fucked up. But every time I think back on it, I get this picture of your face when I told you I loved you and left, again. I kept doing it, I kept hurting you, it's like I couldn't stop even though I wanted to"

She tried to interrupt him, but he wouldn't let her. He had been holding all of his emotions in, and it was time to finally let them out.

"I loved you so much; I had for a really long time. I should have never told you I loved you and then left, I should have stayed. I should have never left, I should have just told you about prom, graduation and about Wal-Mart, I should have never gone to Wal-Mart. Did you know, to this day, I can't go to a Wal-Mart without cringing? Yeah, well, I can't. Anyway, that night, in your dorm, I didn't go there to ask you to run away with me, I honestly didn't. I had it all planned out, but then Dean was there and I panicked, I thought the two of you were getting back together and I was freaking out and I panicked, god I panicked. So I asked you to leave with me, even thought I KNEW your answer would be no, you had college, your mother, I knew you wouldn't leave yet I still asked.

I had it all planned, I was going to move to Star's Hollow, hopefully convince Luke to let me live with him again, work in the diner, and then I would slowly make it up to you, to get you to trust me again. To prove to you how much I loved you, how much I still love you and will always love you. Rory, I don't know what's happened since I last saw you, but you came to see me in Philly, so as soon as I could, I came back, you know.

I told Luke not to tell you, but I called periodically, you know? Once every couple months, just to see how you were doing, to make sure you were okay. He told me that you and Logan were really serious, and that he didn't want me to come back because he didn't want to ruin your relationship because you seemed happy, so I stayed away. But when the publishers said they needed someone to go to New York to open a new bookstore, I couldn't say no. Being close to you, even if I couldn't be close to you, was enough for me. So I went and I got this apartment and then after I furnished it and moved myself and Dodger in, I went out to get coffee and then bam, you showed up.

I didn't even know you were in town, I swear I'm not stalking you. Luke told me that you had this incredible job offer and that you wouldn't be back for a really long time, so it wasn't like I moved here for you. Well I did, but I didn't? Do you get what I'm trying to say? I love you Rory, so much, and I know this isn't me, the old Jess didn't talk so much, I mean I used to use monosyllables and now here I am, talking and going on and on but its all because of you, you made me who I am, your love changed me and I hate the fact that its taken me 6 years to realize that I need you in my life!"

He stopped and took a breath and looked at her, she looked shocked beyond belief.

"Wow Jess, I didn't know you had all of those words in you. Where is my monosyllable using guy that I used to know?" She asked jokingly with a smile on her face. She reached over and tousled his hair, just like she used to when they were dating and kissed his jaw.

"It'll be okay?" he asked questioningly, looking down at her with questioning eyes.

"I hope so" she said quietly as she snuggled into his chest and slowly drifted off to sleep.

She still couldn't believe that he had talked that much, she had almost passed out from the shock, but she had contained herself because they were things that really needed to be said if they wanted to salvage any part of their relationship that they had left. Speaking of their relationship, she wasn't even sure whether or not they had one, considering that just 24 hours ago she had been crying on the side of a street about her ex-boyfriend, the one that had asked her to marry him, and now she was sleeping with one of her other ex-boyfriends.

She couldn't help but sigh as she realized that things in her life would never be easy, not when you are a Gilmore anyway.

AN: Wow, was anyone expecting Jess to talk that much? Haha.