After watching about 20 minutes worth of tv, Grunkle Stan heard a knock at the door. He smiled, once more, his sinister smile that he has when he fucking kills people. He walked up to the door, trying to hide his excitement. He opened it, and sure enough, it was Blubbs and Durland.

Stan had only killed people he knew, friends and family, but today was the day he would kill a stranger, not only a stranger, but a police officer. "We heard some screaming, coming from the area…" Blubbs said. "Oh yeah! That… Umm, I actually think I have some evidence… Infact, I have the guy who caused the ruckus in captivity!" Stan lied. "Really?" questioned Durland. "Yeah!" Stan replied. "Show me the guy…" Blubbs said. "Ok. just follow me." Stan said. As Blubbs followed him to the door to the blender room, he began to think. There was no way a police officer, a person with a job dedicated to solving crimes, was this stupid. He laughed to himself a bit, not being caught onto by the fat officer. Just as he was about to open the door to the blender room and lure the two in, he realized Durland was not with him. He looked around, and saw that Durland was lagging behind, ravaging the gift shop. With one facepalm, Stan realized he would have to go get the retard somehow. He told Blubbs to wait where he was, and walked over to Durland. "Uhh, hey, buddy, you have a screaming case to solve don't you?" Stan questioned. "But I gotta solve this puzzle first!" Durland replied, looking thoughtfully at the sample mystery shack puzzle that literally had 3 pieces not in place. Stan was beginning to get angry. It was like wrangling a small child. "You can, uhh, buy some stuff here once you're done." Stan's thirst for blood was getting antsy, and he was sick of being this FUCKING COP'S tard guard. He then noticed that Durland had gone to the pile of mystery boxes stacked by the cash register. He was opening them all up, and taking the prizes, lack thereof, occasionally, Stan was a cheapskate. Stan went back into the supply closet, which, believe it or not used to be poor Soos's break room, and gathered a ton of mystery boxes. The full stupidity of the situation was beginning to really grate on his nerves. This person was a part of law enforcement. And he was retarded. See how those two don't mix? He was also angry that Blubbs was not doing a damn thing about his stupid friend. Oh well… thought Stan. It will be even more satisfying when I make policeman juice. Stan began to set the boxes down in a line from Durland's current position, to the door. When he reached Blubbs, the officer rightfully questioned what he was doing. "Preparing for… a tour…" Stan said off the top of his head. Blubbs was wondering what the hell kind of tour this is, but didn't question Stan, as he joked to himself that Stan was probably going insane with age. Little did he know, his joke was absolutely correct, save for the "With Age" part. Durland finally ran out of boxes, and began to feel sad, that is until he saw the trail Stan had made. He began to follow them, taking their prizes and leaving them on the ground. He finally got to where Stan and Blubbs where. Stan's thirst for blood was now boiling over. "Ok, now that everyone is here, let's get started, I mean, go look at the criminal." His bloodlust had caused him to slip up, and in front of cops, no less. Thankfully, the two cops were too stupid to realize.

They had entered the room. It was very dark, and the ground was wet, a metallic smell filling the air. "What's the smell, Stan? And why is it so moist in here?" Blubb's questioned in his usual voice. "Oh, it's just the humidity on the insulation…" Stan said, smiling his awful smile, unseen by the cops due to the darkness. "Feel free to peer down. Guy's right in there." Stan said. The cops made their way to the edge of the small platform they were on. Stan pushed them in, and with a resounding "WOAH!" They fell into the currently off blenders. "STAN PINES! I AM A COP AND I CAN HAVE YOU ARRES-GLLLLLLLLRRAAAAAUGHHHHHHHHHHH!" Blubb's tried to shout, cut of by the flipping on of the blenders. Blood was sprayed everywhere, coating the walls and ceilings once more, eviscerating the corpse of ford even more. The worst, however where the cops. Stan shined a light into the blender pit to see what was going on. The cops, screaming in a gurgled, horrified way, were being torn apart. Blood poured out of their mouth, running down their faces, as more splattered from their backs, which were slowly being cut away, turned into human mush by the blenders. Holes were growing in them, like swiss cheese. Blood seeping, rotten holes. The blenders then reached bone. "Uh-oh." Stan said as many bone fragments were hurled at him by the raving blades. Eventually, the cops, still screaming, or at atleast trying to, and now covered in blood, had their vital organs ruptured, each one like a blood bomb, bursting the delicious liquid everywhere. An intestine flew into Stan's face, who slapped it away like a fly. "Yeesh." He remarked, knocking it away like a fly, and making a mental note to wash that part of his face very well. The cops were still gurgling, and Stan thought, since this was going to take a while, he would think about all of the other people he brutally slaughtered. He layed back on the blood soaked ground, getting it in his shirt and hair, closing his eyes and reflecting. Ahh, Dipper, you always were a weakling. I was glad to see you go. Took the least effort to end you. Then there was you, Mabel. I hope you had a nice fall into the pit. It kinda sucks I'll never get to retrieve your body. I'd love to see what it looks like after slamming into a bunch of rocks at terminal velocity. There was never a DULL moment with you, Wendy. Stan paused and laughed at his pun, the fine harmony of cops being ground up by blenders in the background. He then continued his thoughts. Not even when I carved that symbol into your chest… Then there was you, Soos. Just like a dog. Loyal, stupid, hell you even looked like one. Your bonfire was pretty nice. Too bad it smelled like rotten meat and gasoline… As he thought about Gideon, he remembered the head, which he still had to soak. There was pretty much nothing left of the cops now, so he turned the blenders off, and with a coat of blood still stuck to his back like red snow on Christmas morning, He walked upstairs and dunked the head. The tourists were gonna love this.

ATTENTION, READING RECRUITS! I NEED YOUR HELP!

There are 2 more chapters left before 10, the finale, in which no specific person will be killed. I want you all to tell me who you want to see die in the next two chapters. No Bill, because he was killed in Stan's memory erase (Maybe that's what fucked him up so bad. Hmm...). Also, no characters that don't really matter, like Toby, Tyler, etc. So it's up to you folks, who should be swept under the blood tsunami that is Stan's Rampage?