Speak Now or Forever Hold Your Peace
Disclaimer: all characters and copyright belong to Stephanie Meyer.
A/N-thanks for the awesome reviews. Nikki :)
Part Seven
Jacob reached the hospital in record time. He ignored the little fact that he had to speed to get there. He pulled into the car park and was soon running through the double doors to the hospital and down the long corridor toward Charlie's room. He startled Renee, who was just coming out of the room. She put her hand over her heart and stared at him.
"Well I didn't expect to see you back so quickly." She said eventually, eyeing him speculatively.
"Neither did I." Jacob flashed her his sunny grin, which was always guaranteed to melt the heart of anyone he met.
It worked. Renee smiled back at him and stepped aside so he could enter the room. "I take it you are not here to see me. She's in there. Be wary though, whatever you two had a fight about, she is still stewing about it." She teased him.
"I plan on making it up to her I promise." Jacob vowed.
"Good." Renee patted him on the arm. "I'll go and get some coffee and leave you two to chat." She winked at him before walking off in the direction of the canteen.
Jacob stood outside the closed door for a second as he took a deep breath to calm himself. Then he opened the door and strode purposefully inside. He saw Bella twist round in her seat, her eyes opening wide in surprise to see him back so soon. "What are you doing here? Did Billy forget something?"
"No I did." Jacob knelt down in front of her and took her hand. "Bells I'm a fucking idiot."
"Huh?" Bella felt totally perplexed. He seemed a different person from the one who had left earlier. He seemed back to his old self. The indifferent mask was gone and his face showed regret and a little anxiety.
"I read your letter and got the wrong end of the stick. I have no excuse. I let my pride get in the way. I didn't see what you were really trying to tell me." Jacob confessed.
"But I thought it was clear. I didn't hold back." Bella felt Jacob's hand tighten around hers.
"I know, but like you, I have my own insecurities and I let them get the better of me. It was only when I saw your letter to my dad that it really became clear. He was very touched by your words by the way."
"I'm glad." Bella said in relief. "I was worried that I had screwed up yet again."
"No it was only me this time." Jacob stood back up and pulled her up so that she was standing opposite him.
Bella found herself smiling happily at him. The heavy weight of anxiety lifted and she felt much more at peace. "We've got to stop doing this, Jake. We keep misunderstanding each other."
Jacob reached out and held her beloved face between his hands. "I know. From now on we start with a clean slate. No more going back over past issues, we move forward from here and I promise to say what I mean."
"Me too." Bella agreed.
"So, I'm going to be completely honest about what I want." Jacob's expression became serious. "I want you in my life Bells. I know that right now you have other things to focus on, like Charlie getting better and settling back into life here. It's going to be a big change. But I want to be there for you, I want to be your friend, and then later on maybe we can explore the possibility of becoming something more. It's what I've always dreamed of. Will you give us this chance? The chance to start over?" Jacob held his breath. It had been difficult to put his heart on the line yet again. He just hoped he had really understood Bella's intentions when she wrote the letters.
Bella hesitated a second as she absorbed his words. She gazed up into his expressive dark eyes; so full of love, and hope, mixed with a little trepidation that she would still reject him. Bella knew that she had been running from her past, running from the possibility of starting something with Jacob. Edward was now firmly part of her past, and she knew that she was going to have to see him soon and do the right thing. She needed to tell him that it was over for good and that she would never be a part of his life again. She owed him that much, to at least tell him to his face. Things had changed irrevocably inside her since her return to Forks; seeing Charlie incapacitated, spending time with her mother, sleeping in her old bed and reconnecting with Jacob and Billy, had altered her perspective on things. It had made her grow up and forced her to face her inner demons and her guilt over the past. She was ready to move on.
"Are you ever going to speak?" Jacob begged her, pulling her out of her introspection.
Bella shook herself a little and smiled up at him. "Yes." She said simply.
Jacob returned her smile. It was the special smile she remembered from their youth. The smile that could light up a room. They held hands and stood opposite each other, not needing to say anymore, just being.
"Thank god for that." A gruff voice made them both jump. "I thought you were never going to get to the point. No PDA's though."
"Dad!" Bella cried out as she twisted her head to see Charlie, his eyes open, and his head turned to the side as he observed them. "You're awake."
"Not so you'd noticed." His voice was husky from disuse but there was no mistaking the hint of amusement. "Welcome home, kiddo."
Bella felt tears spring to her eyes as she ran over to his side and carefully hugged him. Over her shoulder Charlie looked at Jacob; a satisfied smile on his lips.
A/N-thanks for reading. Sorry for the short chapter, but I think it said all it needed to. Nikki :)
