-Author's note- Hey guys! Before I get this chapter started, I'd just like to say a couple things. First, I'd like to thank anyone who is reading, it really means a lot. I read every review and make sure I save every email I get saying that someone has favorite or followed, those things really make my day. Second… I'm really, really sorry! This story has kind of gotten away from me and decided to write itself, my fingers just go along with whatever the keyboard wants. It's gotten a lot darker and more depressing than I really wanted it to, but I'm a slave to my subconscious mind. I feel a lot of guilt about ruining Berin's life all the time, and it sometimes comes out in my writing. I comfort myself and him with thoughts that his life really does get better, and the last chapter was really the beginning of that. It's not going to be all sunshine and roses, but it definitely does get better. We just have to hold on, Berin! We're about halfway there!

A note about the chapter, there's a lot more dialogue here than I expected, but I really love Lydia so I had to. Fear not! There will be lots of action next chapter!

It took two hours to get everything settled with Avenicci, who was pleased to help with both the renovations to the house and the adoption. As a father himself, he was appalled at the condition that the young girl had been left in and agreed to help Berin find the farm that she used to live on, both to get anything of Lucia's from her relatives and find where her mother had been buried. Berin wanted, rather vindictively he admitted to himself, her relatives to see that she was going to have a good life in spite of them. A better life then they would ever have if Berin had any say in it, which he most certainly did. Perks of being the Thane of Whiterun, though he wouldn't be using the title overmuch.

After visiting Belethor's again, Berin made his way back home with his arms full of bags and packages, all filled with dresses, sleep clothes, shoes, and as many toys and books as he could find for her. There were men waiting outside Breezehome when he got back, the few pieces of furniture for Lucia's bedroom sitting around them.

"Good evening, gentlemen! I apologize for keeping you waiting!" He called out in greeting.

"Good evenin', sir." One of the men answered respectfully. "No harm done. Just waitin' to get in, didn't want to disturb anyone."

"Give me just a moment, then, and I'll get it open." With his arms full like they were, Berin simply walked up to the door and kicked at it, calling out for Lydia.

"Mr. Berin!" A small voice called out as the door opened. "You're back!"

"Lucia! Be a dear and hold the door for us please. We've got our arms full!"

Before they were even fully in the door, Lucia started babbling happily. "Miss Lydia has been teaching me how to cook, Mr. Berin! She's even been letting me help, even though I have to stay away from the fire because it's hot. We're making vegetable stew because Miss Lydia says that it'll be good for us. Is that true Mr. Berin?"

She kept on with nonstop questions as Berin gave the men their instructions and started unpacking his bags, only falling silent as he pulled out the first small dress. He turned around after a few moments of silence to see her completely awestruck, the beginnings of tears in her eyes. Picking up the dress, he went and knelt down beside her.

"Do you like it? I didn't know what color you might like." He asked, holding the sapphire colored dress up for her.

"Is… is that for me?" She asked in a small voice, looking at Berin both hopefully and cautiously. As if she were afraid that it might be a cruel joke. Berin's heart broke once again at such an expression on her young face and swore right then that he would do whatever it took to make sure that she would never have a reason to feel such fear again.

"Yes." He said simply.

"But why?"

"Lucia," He began, taking her small hand in his. "I'm sorry about your parent's, and that your relatives are worthless human beings. But most of all, I'm sorry you were left alone." Squeezing her hand comfortingly, he smiled at her softly. "But how would you like to not be alone anymore?"

"R-really?"

"Yes, really. Now, I can't promise to always be here myself, I have some very important things that I have to do before I can stay home for good, but I can promise that I will always make sure that you're taken care of. Is that okay? Would you like to stay here?"

"More than anything!" She cried as she leapt into his arms, wrapping her own around his neck. Berin patted her back as he felt tears soak through his shirt. "Does this mean…" She asked, her voice muffled in his shirt. "That you're my papa now?"

Berin's heart stuttered almost to a stop. He could see his wife and daughter in his mind's eye… they were smiling at him, and he knew then that they were proud of him. It hit him suddenly, the magnitude of what he was doing.

And he didn't regret one moment.

"Yes, it does, Lucia."

Berin was woken early the next morning by small body jumping on top of him.

"Papa! Papa, wake up!"

Berin groaned when she hit a particularly sore spot as she bounced. He finally relented, pulling the blanket from his face and scowling as the early morning sun streaming through the small window blinded him temporarily.

"Good morning, Lucia." He said through a yawn.

"Good morning, papa!" She said happily, bouncing forward to kiss his cheek. "Miss Lydia sent me to wake you up for breakfast! We've got lots to do, she says!"

"Ugh… don't remind me. So much for a restful week." He went through his mental list.

Visit Adrienne at the forge to see about reinforcing my armor, visit the Companions to get help for the mammoth hunt, I still have no idea how I managed to get roped into getting a mammoth tusk for Ysolda, finish getting supplies for the trip, hire a carriage to take Lucia to Riverwood if Sigrid and Alvor can take her… oh gods, the list goes on. I'm exhausted already!

Lucia interrupted his thought by tugging on his hand. "Come on, papa! I'm hungry!"

Berin let out a laugh. "Alright, alright! I'm coming! Just let me get dressed and I'll be right down."

He chuckled as she let out a "Yay!" and raced downstairs. It was an odd, almost bittersweet feeling to have a child around. Ever since losing Anya and Zeliza, he had never really considered his future. It had been too soon for him. He had so much trouble just facing the day, had to force himself out of bed and through some façade of an existence. For almost a month he had drowned himself in whatever alcohol he could get his hands on, almost got himself killed on more than one instance…

And yet, here he was, still breathing. Somehow able to keep going, to laugh, to care, and yes… even to love. His heart still ached with the loss of his first love and their child, but somehow he'd managed to make it. Four months had passed him by, more would follow, and one way or another he would keep walking forward.

It seemed like Lucia would be leading the way, holding his hand in hers.

Berin swore that we would do his best to protect her, to care for her, and make sure that she always knew that he loved her as his own. There would never be any questions or doubts. She was his daughter, and he was her father.

Finally, Berin shook himself out of his reverie. He picked out a spare set of armor he had scavenged from a bandit leader (and cleaned thoroughly after.) It was heavier than he was used to, but his armor was somewhat worse for wear and he needed something to wear while Adrienne work on his regular armor. Grumbling slightly, he got dressed and headed downstairs.

Lydia, it seemed, had made a quick run to get fresh eggs that morning, and had several in a shallow pot frying with strips of bacon. A warm loaf of bread sat on the table already, sliced and waiting for the spiced butter beside it. Lucia was already munching on a slice, a small mug of milk beside her plate, and she sent him a big smile and a wave as he sat down beside her. Berin chuckled and ruffled her hair, helping himself to a plate and mug of his own, ignoring the bottles of mead in front of him in exchange for the pitcher of milk instead. Within moments, Lydia was dishing out generous helpings of eggs and bacon. Berin eyed her speculatively as she fixed her plate. He waited until she took her first bite before launching into his questioning.

"Why aren't you married, Lydia?"

He was answered by coughing and spluttering as she choked on her food, causing Lucia to start giggling.

"W-what?!" Lydia asked after she'd taken a sip of mead to clear her throat. "Why?!"

Berin shrugged innocently, sending a wink to Lucia and making her giggle again. "It was just a question. You're what, twenty-five? I was wondering why you weren't married. Just not interested? Men are scum? Haven't met the right guy? I'm curious."

Lydia rolled her eyes at his questioning. "You know very well that I'm thirty, Berin Velandus, so stop your flattery!"

"Flattery?!" Berin exclaimed dramatically. "I would never flatter! I speak only in truths! But seriously, I'm curious. You're a lovely woman, loyal, kind, good with children apparently, can cook, and can flay a man alive before he could blink. Why hasn't a man snapped you up yet?"

Lydia blushed at this, a first for Berin and he celebrated silently. "If you must know, flatterer, there may or may not be a man…"

Lucia gasped happily. "Really, Miss Lydia?! What's his name? Is he nice? Can I meet him? Is he handsome? Are you going to marry him?"

Berin got almost as excited as Lucia, repeating many of the same questions as Lydia blushed deeper with every question.

Finally, she lost her patience. "Enough!" She cried, slightly annoyed and embarrassed. "I will answer if you let me be for a moment!" Berin quickly covered his mouth with one hand and Lucia's with the other, and they both stared at her like baby birds. She shook her head in despair. How this man could go from a dead serious adult to an almost child, she would never truly understand.

He's only nineteen. She reminded herself sadly.Though he's never really had a chance to be a child, he's barely more than a child himself. Somehow he still holds onto some innocence, despite everything.

She sighed slightly before smiling at them both. "His name is Benor. He's a hopeful member of the guards in Morthal, and we met when he was sent to Whiterun on a message errand. I was tasked with making sure that he was taken care of, so when he asked about a tavern I took him down to the Bannered Mare." She smiled fondly at the memory. "We were both young then. I had just turned seventeen and he was just shy of nineteen, so when an older member of the Companions challenged him to a drinking contest, he of course had to step up to the challenge. I was still in training with both the Whiterun guards and the Companions, so I knew better and advised against it, but he very arrogantly said to let the menfolk be. I laughed quite loudly when they drank him under the table and left him there. I was still laughing when I dragged him outside and around back so he could vomit in peace. He was almost sober by the time he was finished, so I took him back inside and sat him down with a flagon of water.

"I was sitting with some of the younger guards and sharing a quiet drink when he decided that his pride was wounded too much to bear. I could only watch in exasperation when he stood on a bench and challenged any who would 'dare' to fight him hand-to-hand. A couple of the men sitting with me decided to take him up on it, at the same time unfortunately, but he managed to hold his own against them well enough, even when a third joined the brawl. Poor Hulda was beside herself, not knowing what to do, her mother ran the place and she was just a waitress at the time. She begged me to do something about it, and being the only one who was truly sober at the time I did what I could, since the older patrons were too busy laughing at all of the chaos." She shook her head and took a sip from her drink, with Berin and Lucia both watching with rapt attention as she continued her story.

"By the time I waded into the fight, there were a good seven people fighting amongst each other. With no evident sides or teams, it was just an 'every man for himself' kind of brawl, so it made it easier for me. The first man I pulled out of the bunch swung at me in surprise, but I was lucky enough to block the hit with my forearms before knocking him out with a couple of well-placed hits in his gut and face. I threw him out of the group and into the older men who were watching everything. Luckily they managed to catch him before he fell into the fire and put him in a chair, before deciding to start taking bets on the remaining fighters. I heard one, old Skjor funnily enough, call out over the others that he put fifty gold coins on me thrashing the rest. Since he was one of the ones to teach me, I felt that I couldn't let him down, so I squared my shoulders and jumped right back into the fray." She chuckled a little. "It took me about fifteen minutes, but I finally managed to clear the room of everyone except Benor. Everyone that had been involved in the brawl had gone home to nurse bruises, headaches, and probably some pretty nasty hangovers. Not everyone had been drunk on alcohol, but all had been drunk on their own 'manly pride.'" This was said with a roll of her eyes. "So, luckily for Hulda, they were all so upset at losing to a young, untried, female Housecarl-in-training, they all stayed away from the Bannered Mare for almost a week after.

"As the rest were settling their bets, I asked Hulda for a mug of water and some bandages since I didn't come out of it unscathed. With a split lip, bloody nose, bruises beginning to appear on every bare patch of skin, and a black eye, I must have looked quite the sight. Skjor was patting me on the back and congratulating me on my triumph when I realized that Benor was still in a fighting stance in the middle of the room, facing away from me. When I walked up and called his name, his only reply was a roar as he turned and started swinging. He surprised me enough that he managed to land a few punches before I was able to start defending myself, and it hurt like a…" She cut herself off, Berin glaring at her a covering Lucia's ears. She cleared her throat uncomfortably. "Anyway… I heard Skjor and the others objecting loudly, but I waved their help off. Benor was good, very very good, but I made sure to give as good as I got, and eventually I got fed up with him. I pulled out a fool proof tactic that I learned from Aela the Huntress… and kicked him squarely between the legs."

Berin grunted and crossed his legs, causing her to laugh. Lucia just looked confused for a moment, and started to ask a question that nobody was ready for, so Lydia went right back to the story.

"That hit certainly got him. He didn't fall, but it did stun him long enough for me knock him out with two hits. As I stood over his body on the floor, breathing heavily and aching everywhere, I heard everybody in the tavern started clapping and cheering. I think I managed a full-body blush at that point, but I let my teachers gloat over my achievement, though Skjor still pointed out many things that I had done wrong, and pretended to let the young Twins the Companions were raising, Farkas and Vilkas, buy me a drink. They were only about twelve at the time and were cute little buggers, despite being almost as tall as I was. I kept throwing Benor glances, though, and eventually I felt guilty about leaving him on the floor. Farkas helped me get him up and threw his arm over my shoulder, and I almost faltered at how heavy he was. I managed, though, and started dragging him to the nearby guard house.

"We were about halfway there when he started stirring and muttering something. I ignored it at first, thinking he was cursing or some rot, but then he said something quite clearly. 'Marry me.' I almost dropped him in surprise, but brushed it off. I figured he must have been dreaming or something, but then the scoundrel did something I wasn't expecting. He kissed my neck and mumbled, 'Marry me, Lydia.' I really did drop him then and could only watch in wide-eyed horror as he groaned and struggled to get off the ground." She laughed a bit. "I left him there and ran to the nearest guard and asked him to escort Benor to the guard station, then I ran to my room in Dragonsreach and locked myself in for the rest of the night. I was almost afraid to leave my room the next morning, but I had promised the captain that I would be Benor's guide, and my honor wouldn't let me break my word. My only hope was that he wouldn't remember anything from the night before. I forgot, of course, that I was painted a nice black and blue from the fight, so he did remember. He apologized for his behavior and swore that he'd never drink again, then went silent. I thought that was going to be it."

"But it wasn't, was it?"

"Not by any means. After a few minutes he asked me again to marry him, and I sat there completely dumb-struck as he went on about swearing to never marry unless it was to a woman that could beat him in a fight, and about how beautiful I looked as I thrashed everyone. I nearly ran again right then, but then he caught my hand, knelt before me, and promised that he would work to win my heart if I promised to give him a chance. I was young, and charmed in spite of myself, so I did. I gave him a chance and he spent the next few days trying desperately to woo me." She patted the sword at her side. "This was one of his first gifts to me, and my shield was the last gift before he left. He asked permission to write to me until he could come again, which I agreed to… but he still looked so miserable to be leaving." Lydia blushed again. "So I kissed him right before he left. His face was absolutely glowing with happiness as he left. A year of writing later and I finally told him yes."

Confused, Lucia interrupted. "But Miss Lydia, if you love him and wanted to marry him, why didn't you?"

Lydia smiled sadly. "A lot of different reasons, Lucia. Even with a decade of saving, we haven't quite enough for a home of our own, nor have we decided where we would even want to live. We also both have our duties, which are very important to us. We're still happy though, and we see each other whenever we can." She looked down and poked at her food.

"Why didn't you suggest the road through Morthal when we spoke of traveling to Ustengrav, Lydia?" Berin asked quietly, upset at his friend's unhappiness. "Then you could see him again."

Lydia made a face. "I… really don't like the thought of the marshes. The giant bugs are bad enough, I'm not fond of them even when they're normal sized, but Benor has been writing more often about how dangerous the swamps surrounding Morthal have become… I worry about him."

Berin looked thoughtful for a long while. The others had finished their food before he finally snapped out of his thoughts, slamming his hand down on the table.

"I know what we can do!" He cried happily. When all he received in response were incredulous and confused looks, he elaborated quickly. "We've amassed a small fortune in the short time I've been in Skyrim." He did the math in his head quickly. "Almost 5,000 gold, if I remember correctly. I'm sure that we could pool our resources together and find a piece of land to buy, then build a few small houses on! We could make our own little settlement!"

"Berin, that's… very sweet, but I can't imagine where we'd be able to find land, let alone something cheap enough for us to afford." Lydia said lowly, but her eyes sparkled with hope.

Berin wasn't going to let her down. "Just think about it. We're going through Morthal on the way back from Ustengrav, though. I need to meet him. Make sure he's worthy of you."

Lydia just scoffed and rolled her eyes.

Two mammoths, one giant, and a half-day later found Berin trudging back into Whiterun with several of the Companions, including Aela and the infamous Twins (who all corroborated Lydia's story, much to Berin's amazement. The Twins had been several years younger than Lydia at the event in question, and very much in awe of young woman. Even now they seemed to see her almost as an idol, grown men though they were.) They laughed and talked as they made their way to the marketplace where they split the spoils of their hunt and went their separate ways, the Companions back to Jorvaskr and Berin to seek out Ysolda.

Ysolda was delighted to accept the mammoth tusk she needed for trading with the Khajiit caravans, and in return taught Berin several tricks to get the best deal out of any scheming merchants. He grinned as he used the tricks immediately, managing to almost bankrupt Belethor by selling everything that was left over from the hunt. Tasks finally completed and eager to get home, Berin jogged back down the street to Breezehome. He had only just made it to the door when it burst open and a small figure rushed out to jump in his arms.

"Papa! You're home!"

Berin laughed and spun her around, listening contentedly as she began babbling happily.

"We were worried because you were so late! Did you see any mammoths? Were they really big? Oh! We have a guest!"

He laughed again at her rapid questions. "Slow down, Lucia!" He said as he put her down and ruffled her hair. "One thing at a time! Yes, I saw some mammoths, and yes, they were very big! I'm late because there were quite a few. And who do we have visiting?"

"Aunt Sigrid!"

Berin stopped short. "Aunt Sigrid?"

"Yep! She told me to call her that right when she came in! She's really nice, papa."

"I know she is, dear." Berin replied distractedly, slightly worried about why Sigrid was here so suddenly. Was something wrong in Riverwood? Why wasn't Dorthe here? Or Alvor? He grabbed Lucia's hand and pulled her into the house urgently.

Sigrid was standing at the small cooking pot above the firepit, stirring a thick stew and talking with Lydia. Both woman looked up as Berin shut the door.

"Berin! I'm glad you're home! Supper's almost ready."

Seeing Sigrid in such good spirits smothered most of Berin's worries, but he had to check to be sure.

"Sigrid! Not that it's not good to see you, but what are you doing here? Where are Dothe and Alvor? Are they okay? Did something happen in Riverwood? Did you come here by yourself? It's not safe!" Berin's ramblings were cut short by a small hand pulling on his shirt.

"Slow down, papa!" Lucia giggled, echoing his words from outside. "One thing at a time!"

The two older women burst into laughter as Berin blushed crimson. Picking the girl up and sitting her on his hip, he poked her nose. "No using my words against me, if you please, little one. I deal with that quite enough with Miss Lydia."

Lucia stuck her tongue out at him as he set her down and Berin, being the mature adult that he was… stuck his out right back, causing Lydia to snort into her drink.

"Go help Aunt Sigrid by setting the table, you rascal."

"Yes, papa."

As Sigrid served the stew, Berin repeated his questions, albeit at a slower pace.

"Calm down, Berin." Sigrid said with exasperation. "Dorthe and Alvor are at home and fine. Riverwood hasn't burned down without you there. As for coming here by myself, I'll have you know that I'm very good on a horse, which I borrowed from the village innkeeper, Delphine. I was very careful and safe." She smirked suddenly. "Oh how the tables have turned! I bet you won't say anything about my 'excessive worrying' anymore, will you?"

"No, ma'am." Berin replied weakly, face turning red again.

"As for why I'm here, I should think it would be obvious. I'm actually a little insulted that you didn't think that I would come here as soon as I could when you wrote to me about Lucia."

"I was going to send her to you when I got your answer, which you never sent for obvious reasons!"

"Send her by herself or with a practical stranger? I don't think so!" She smacked his head with a wooden spoon, causing Lucia to giggle. "What were you thinking?!"

"I don't know!" Berin groaned, frustrated and rubbing his forehead wearily. "I was working with what I had. I just knew that I couldn't leave her out there."

Sigrid smiled softly as Lucia climbed into Berin's lap, snuggling against him as he put his arms around her. "Of course you couldn't, dear. But remember what I said to you last time you were at home with us? You're not alone. We're here for you, and you know that I'd be here as soon as I could if you needed me."

Berin smiled warmly, looking at the family he had found.

"I know."

I think I'll be okay, Anya. You take care of Zeliza, I'm well looked after here.

They stayed in Whiterun for three more days before deciding that their short vacation was over. Rumors of dragons flying over hamlets and towns all over Skyrim reached them, and they knew that time was running out. They needed to ride to Dawnstar.

Lucia had refused to let go of Berin for almost ten minutes before finally releasing him to get into the carriage that he had rented to take her and Sigrid back to Riverwood. After placing her carefully in the carriage, Berin reached up to grasp her hand tightly.

"I promise that I'll finish this as soon as I can, Lucia. Then we can both come home, okay?"

"Okay, papa." She sniffed miserably.

"Until then, you're going to have a lot of fun with Aunt Sigrid and Dorthe, right? You're gonna help keep Frodnar in line?" That bought him a shaky grin as she nodded.

"I love you, papa."

Tears sprang to his eyes. He pulled her gently from the carriage and into another hug. "I love you too, sweetheart. I'll be back soon, okay?"

She nodded again, swiping at the tears on her face, and he placed her back in the cart. He saw Sigrid wipe away some tears of her own before calling for the driver to go, the two Companions he had hired to ride with them falling in beside the carriage. He and Lydia waved until it was out of sight before turning away to their own horses. Berin leaned his forehead on the saddle of his horse, breathing deeply to calm himself.

Lydia came up behind him to put a comforting hand on his shoulder. "We'll see her before too long, Berin. Then maybe we can settle down for a while."

"I hope for her sake that you're right, Lydia." He turned back toward her, eyes downcast and shoulders slumped. "But I've only been in Skyrim for about five weeks now, and somehow, things keep piling up. Do this for one person, and another person needs you to do something. While you help that person, you find another person that needs help, and that's not even including the mess with the dragons! It's never ending! Were people absolutely helpless before I came along?" They mounted up as he ranted and set off.

"No." Lydia snorted. "They've just figured out that you're too good to say no. Maybe, just maybe might I add, we don't have a choice with the dragon business, though I still think that more people could definitely help with that, but you don't have to help every single person you come across, Berin." She eyed him critically as he groaned. "You, my Thane, have a serious hero complex."

"You know, Anya said much the same thing to me many times."

"Smart woman."

Berin shrugged helplessly. "I can't just turn my back on them."

"Oh, you definitely could. Don't get me wrong, Berin, it's good that you help people. Just… don't let them take advantage of that goodness, okay? It might get you into trouble one day. Besides, most people can help themselves, they just don't."

"I'll try not to, Lydia, but I can't make any promises. I'll also try to always have someone around to keep me on track. Will that do?"

"That'll do. Wouldn't mind some backup in that area actually."

"Hey!" Berin cried indignantly. "I'm not that bad!"

"Berin, you went hunting mammoths, mammoths! As in multiple of the largest beasts in Skyrim, because Ysolda needed a tusk to be able to trade with a Khajiit merchant!"

"I… uh… she…" Berin sputtered, before finally sighing in defeat. "Fine, you win."

Lydia's hysterical laughter was the only answer he got.