6. Monster

Bella slept wordlessly, resting her head on my chest. I wondered if the nightmares were tormenting her again. I prayed they weren't. Because I needed to go hunting. This past week had been, well, a typical honeymoon, and I knew that me being thirsty wasn't going to help anything. It was agonizing to think of leaving my wife, but I saw the necessity of it. And, hopefully, she would never notice I was gone. But, just in case she woke up from one of her dreams, I left her a note.

I'm hoping you won't wake and notice my absence, but, if you should, I'll be back very soon. I've just gone to the mainland to hunt. Go back to sleep and I'll be here when you wake again. I love you.

I folded the piece of paper in half and addressed the outside of it to Mrs. Cullen. And then I left, swimming as fast as I could to the mainland, hoping to catch some animals quickly so I could get back to the island. It hurt being away from Bella.

Luckily for me, I did catch some jaguars in the jungle pretty quickly and was able to head back. When I got back to the house, I heard the DVD player playing the main menu of the movie we'd watched last week. We had never taken it out. And the windows were open, the hot breeze coming in. Bella was asleep on the couch, and she was sweating profusely. So much for me being thorough. I hadn't even considered how hot she would be here without me gone. I hadn't remembered that she'd started sweating when I was gone for just a few minutes on her first night here.

I sat down on the sofa, turned off the TV, and pulled her into my arms, wiping my hand across her clammy forehead. She woke up in response to the change in temperature.

"I'm sorry," I murmured. "So much for thoroughness. I didn't think about how hot you would be with me gone. I'll have an air conditioner installed before I leave again."

"Excuse me!" she gasped, struggling to get free of my arms.

"Bella?" I let her go and she ran to the bathroom, and was then violently sick. I held her while she crouched over the toilet, pulling her hair back. "Bella? What's wrong?"

"Damn rancid chicken," she moaned when she could speak again.

"Are you all right?" I asked, the concern making my voice tense.

"Fine," she panted. "It's just food poisoning. You don't need to see this. Go away."

Nice try. "Not likely, Bella."

"Go away," she moaned again.

I gently helped her to stand, ignoring the weak shoves she aimed at me. I then got her a glass of water so she could rinse her mouth out and, when her mouth was clean, carried her back to the bed and sat her down, supporting her with my arms.

"Food poisoning?" I asked.

"Yeah," she croaked. "I made some chicken last night. It tasted off, so I threw it out. But I ate a few bites first."

I put my hand on her clammy forehead. "How do you feel now?"

"Pretty normal. A little hungry, actually."

I made her wait an hour and keep down a big glass of water before frying her some eggs. When she'd finished them and wasn't sick again, I put on CNN and she lounged across my lap, tired from having been up in the middle of the night.

After a few hours, she got bored with the news and turned around, I assumed to kiss me, but then jumped up and ran to the kitchen sink, unable to make it all the way to the bathroom. I rushed behind her and held her hair again.

"Maybe we should go back to Rio, see a doctor," I suggested anxiously while she was rinsing her mouth.

She shook her head. She was terrified of doctors. Well, not doctors so much as needles. "I'll be fine right after I brush my teeth."

I went back to the sofa to wait for her, but she took a little too long, so I walked up to the closed bathroom door and knocked. "Are you well?" I asked through the door. "Did you get sick again?"

"Yes and no," she said in a strained voice.

Now I was worried. Something wasn't right here. If she had food poisoning, she would still be getting sick, and she wouldn't be feeling perfectly normal after she had. I had enough medical training to know that. "Bella? Can I please come in?" I pleaded, my worry coming through in my voice.

"O…kay?"

I walked in and looked at her. She was sitting cross-legged on the floor, her expression blank, staring at nothing. I went and sat next to her, putting my hand on her forehead again. "What's wrong?"

"How many days has it been since the wedding?" she whispered.

I didn't understand. "Seventeen. Bella, what is it?"

She held up a finger, signaling for me to wait.

After a minute, I couldn't stand it anymore. "Bella!" I whispered urgently. "I'm losing my mind over here."

She didn't answer. She just reached into the suitcase in front of her and fumbled around, pulling out a box of tampons and holding them up silently.

I couldn't comprehend this. I didn't want to think what she was trying to tell me. It couldn't be true. "What? Are you trying to pass this illness off as PMS?"

"No," she choked out. "No, Edward. I'm trying to tell you that my period is five days late. I don't think I have food poisoning."

I froze, unable to think, unable to move. Of course! Her sleep patterns changing, her description of the dreams, her appetite changing, her irrational tears at the most bizarre moments. Of course she was pregnant. And I couldn't hate myself for the past week, either, because it hadn't been from that. No, I'd gotten her pregnant on our very first night here. That was when everything started changing. I was a monster. And now I'd placed a monster inside of her. I was a monster for having agreed to this honeymoon in the first place.

I vaguely heard her mumbling to herself. "The dreams. Sleeping so much. The crying. All that food. Oh. Oh. Oh."

I wanted to get up and go to her, but I was frozen in place. I was incapable of moving. I couldn't speak. I couldn't move. I couldn't think. I couldn't see straight. I was a monster. I knew I would hurt her if we made love while she was still a human. I knew it!

"Oh!" she squeaked again. And suddenly I saw it. Her hand was folded over her stomach, which was now bulging out. "Impossible," she whispered.

How had I not noticed before? The bump was not huge, but it was definitely there. This wasn't a human child. I wasn't sure what it was exactly, but this only confirmed my suspicions that it would hurt her. It was growing too quickly. I needed to get her home. I needed to see Carlisle, so he could make some sense out of this madness. My medical training had not prepared me for this. I couldn't think anymore. I couldn't move. I could not go to her, could not hold her, could not speak to her.

I sat there, not seeing anything anymore. I saw red. How could this be happening? I was frozen, a living stone. How could a living stone conceive a child? It wasn't possible. If it were, Esme and Rosalie would have figured out a way by now.

But then it dawned on me. Human male bodies didn't change from puberty until death. Human female bodies did. The reason vampire women couldn't conceive a child was because their bodies could not change in order to accommodate the child. But Bella's body could. And my body didn't have to change. Of course, how could any legends exist about vampire men fathering children, when their mates were unable? I was the only vampire I could think of that would have the restraint or the inclination necessary to test the theory with a human. Of course Bella could have a child with me. I hadn't needed to change in order to father a child. She was the only one who would need to change for this to happen. And it was happening.

I heard my cell phone ringing, but it sounded far away. I couldn't move to answer it. Finally, Bella came over to me and patted through my pockets, pulling the phone out and answering it. I listened to the conversation, which sounded like it was happening through a closed door, grateful that I was able to hear the other end of it.

"Hi, Alice," Bella said in a strained voice.

"Bella? Bella, are you okay?"

"Yeah. Um. Is Carlisle there?"

"He is. What's the problem?"

"I'm not…one hundred percent…sure…"

"Is Edward all right?" she asked warily, and then called for Carlisle. "Why didn't he pick up the phone?"

"I'm not sure."

"Bella, what's going on? I just saw—"

"What did you see?"

Yes, what had Alice seen? That would be very helpful to know right now.

Alice didn't answer for a long moment. "Here's Carlisle," she finally said.

"Bella, it's Carlisle," Carlisle said, worried. "What's going on?"

"I—I'm a little worried about Edward…Can vampires go into shock?"

She was pregnant with something that was not human, and she was worried about me? Why was I not surprised? Whenever she was in mortal danger, her only concern was always for me.

"Has he been harmed?" Carlisle asked urgently.

"No, no," Bella said. "Just…taken by surprise."

"I don't understand, Bella."

"I think…well, I think that…maybe…I might be…" she took a deep breath. "Pregnant." Her hand flew to her stomach.

She might be pregnant? What other explanation could there possibly be?

After a very long pause, Carlisle's medical training kicked in. "When was the first day of your last menstrual cycle?"

"Sixteen days before the wedding," she said immediately. She had probably counted fifty times to be sure of it.

"How do you feel?" he asked.

"Weird," she said, her voice breaking. She started to cry. "This is going to sound crazy—look, I know it's way too early for any of this. Maybe I am crazy. But I'm having bizarre dreams and eating all the time and crying and throwing up and…and…I swear something moved inside me just now."

That last bit of information made my head snap up. Suddenly, I regained control of my motor skills. What was this thing that I had placed inside the body I loved? It was way too early for her to feel it moving inside her. I needed to talk to Carlisle. I held my hand out for the phone.

"Um, I think Edward wants to talk to you," Bella told Carlisle after a long pause.

"Put him on," Carlisle said in a strained voice.

Bella placed the phone in my hand, looking like she wasn't sure if I could talk, and sat beside me. Frankly, I wasn't sure if I could talk either, but I needed to try. I put the phone to my ear. "Is it possible?" I managed to whisper.

"Edward, I'm so sorry. I didn't even think or know to warn you. There have been…legends…of humans conceiving children with vampires. They were a very long time ago, and there has never been any proof, so I didn't even think that they could possibly be true. But…the legends said that the children were half human and half vampire. Strong like vampires, and feeding on blood and human food both, but their hearts beat and they had blood in their veins. The legends also said that the children grew very fast, developing completely in about a month."

"And Bella?" I asked quietly, pulling my angel close to my side as I spoke.

"I don't know, Edward. The legends I heard didn't say anything about the mothers." He was terrified now, and I could tell he was revolted with himself for not thinking to warn us. He loved Bella as his own daughter. I was sure it sickened him to think that his oversight had caused this. "Edward, you have to get her back here. We have to get that thing out of her before it can hurt her. I don't know what will happen to her if this thing is allowed to grow. I don't care if you have to get Air Force One there to get her back here, you do it. I'll be ready when you get back."

"Yes. Yes, I will," I said, and hung up. I immediately started to dial the airport.

"What did Carlisle say?" Bella asked.

"He thinks you're pregnant," I answered in a monotone, lifeless voice.

"Who are you calling now?"

"The airport. We're going home."

Of course, why would the people at the airport be accommodating or speedy when I needed it most? I was on the phone with them for over an hour, arranging a nonstop flight from Rio to Seattle for today. For a while, they told me that it wasn't possible, that the flight was full and the next available flight was in a week. I hissed and argued violently with them, offering any amount of money to get us on the flight that was leaving today. While I argued, I packed, throwing a set of clothes on the bed for Bella as I spoke. Finally, I got them to agree to get us on the flight.

I walked into the kitchen, where Bella was absentmindedly eating a bag of pretzels.

"Bella?" I asked softly.

She turned, and I saw that she was crying.

I rushed to her side, putting my hands on her face. "Bella! Are you in pain?"

"No, no—"

If she wasn't in pain, then she had to be frightened. That was the only logical explanation. I pulled her close against my chest. "Don't be afraid. We'll be home in sixteen hours. You'll be fine. Carlisle will be ready when we get there. We'll take care of this, and you'll be fine, you'll be fine." I said the words as much to myself as to her.

I was terrified. Somehow, I didn't think it would be that simple. I didn't know why, but some little voice in my head was telling me that something would go wrong. But how could it? Carlisle would get the monster out of her before it could hurt her. Everything would be all right.

"Take care of this? What do you mean?" Bella asked.

What did she think I meant? I leaned away, keeping my arms wrapped around her, and looked her in the eye. "We're going to get that thing out before it can hurt any part of you. Don't be scared. I won't let it hurt you."

"That thing?" Bella gasped.

Before I could explain to her what was growing inside of her, I heard a boat. Oh, for the love of all that was holy! Gustavo and Kaure were due today. "Dammit! I forgot Gustavo was due today. I'll get rid of him and be right back." I darted out of the room and to the front door.

Of course, it wouldn't be quite that easy to get rid of Kaure. She insisted on leaving the dinner she'd made for us and coming inside for a moment to see Bella. She wasn't taking no for an answer. Defeated, I grunted in exasperation and led Kaure to the kitchen.

I walked back to Bella, standing in front of her as I wiped the tears from her cheeks. Maybe, if I was lucky, Kaure wouldn't have to see her. I leaned down and murmured in my love's ear. "She's insisting on leaving the food she brought—she made us dinner. It's an excuse—she wants to make sure I haven't killed you yet." Yet. That was the key word there.

Kaure came around the corner, setting the dish down and telling us to enjoy it.

I snapped at her, a little too harshly, telling her to leave. Hurt, she turned to go. The motion of her skirt twirling wafted the scent of the food in our direction, and Bella whirled to the sink again. It was a strong scent, onions and fish. It had made her sick. I put my hand on her forehead and murmured comforting words to her as she vomited in the sink. And then I realized that if I could make the smell go away, it might make her feel better, so I turned and grabbed the dish, putting it in the refrigerator, and then put my hands back on Bella's face.

I caressed the side of her face as she rinsed her mouth in the tap, and then pulled her close to me. Her hands folded around her stomach and she rested her head on my shoulder.

And then Kaure saw. She gasped, her eyes gaping wide, and extended her hands halfway, unable to speak. Her eyes zeroed in on Bella's stomach. She had heard the same legends Carlisle had. She knew what was growing inside Bella. I turned us so that Bella was behind me and stood protectively in front of her, keeping one hand across her torso.

And then Kaure was shouting at me, calling me a cold-hearted murderer. But I needed her to understand that I loved Bella. That I didn't mean for this to happen. I stepped toward her and told her how much I loved Bella, how irreversibly she had altered me, in a low, pleading voice.

And then she asked me the simple question. Was I a Lobishomen?

I nodded once, and she took a step back in fear.

I reached one hand toward her, gesturing to my angel with my other hand and then resting that hand on her neck. I assured her that I wouldn't hurt her, and tried to explain that I had never meant to hurt Bella.

Kaure screamed at me again, this time for being so careless as to not consider what having physical relations with a human could result in.

Did she possibly know something about what was growing inside Bella? I pleaded with her to tell me everything she knew.

She looked doubtful for a minute, still not completely sure of my affections for Bella. Not convinced that I would find some way to die if Bella ceased to exist. And then she mimed what looked like a balloon jutting out from her stomach and took a few steps forward, telling me that the thing had to be destroyed before it gained too much strength. She asked how long we'd been here and when I'd had relations with Bella. I answered her questions in brief, clipped sentences.

Then I asked her one simple question. Did the mothers ever survive in these legends?

She shook her head slowly.

I couldn't move again for a long moment. When I finally could, I pleaded with Kaure again, begging her to tell me if there was even the slightest hope for Bella. In response, she walked up to Bella and put her hand over Bella's hand, which was still resting on her stomach.

"Morte," she said, and then walked out. Dead. My Bella was going to die because of this thing I'd placed inside her.

I was frozen in place, until Bella started to move away from me. I couldn't be away from her for a single second of the precious little time we had left to us if Carlisle's procedure didn't work.

"Where are you going?" I asked her, and I didn't even try to keep the pain out of my voice.

"To brush my teeth again."

"Don't worry about what she said. It's nothing but legends, old lies for the sake of entertainment." I said that as much for my benefit as for hers.

"I didn't understand anything."

Of course she hadn't understood. We'd been speaking in Portuguese and Ticuna. I wasn't thinking straight now. What was I doing? Oh, yes. She wanted her toothbrush. "I packed your toothbrush. I'll get it for you."

I walked ahead of her to the bedroom.

"Are we leaving soon?" she called after me.

"As soon as you're done."

I waited for her as she brushed her teeth so I could repack her toothbrush, pacing around the bedroom. I was trying to convince myself that everything would be all right, that Carlisle would help me get this thing out of my Bella. How could I have done this? How could I have been so careless? I was a monster. A hideous, vile monster. Bella walked up to me and handed me her toothbrush a few minutes later, interrupting my thoughts.

"I'll get the bags into the boat," I told her, walking out with the trunks in my hand.

"Edward—"

I turned back to face my angel. "Yes?"

"Could you…pack some of the food? You know, in case I get hungry again."

"Of course," I said. Anything. Anything she wanted, I would give her now. "Don't worry about anything. We'll get to Carlisle in just a few hours, really. This will all be over soon."

She nodded weakly.

I turned and left the room, unable to move faster than at normal human speed. I carried the trunks down to the boat and then went back to get Bella. She was waiting in the doorway. I carried her slowly down to the boat, and then I raced us back to Rio as fast as we could possibly go.