First off I wan't to give a HUGE thanks to springbrume, safa56bmc, lilo, Patriot16, Lady Minuialwen, Australia, happyazngirl, summersidefolly, Emzy2k11, amaris12345, Haldirsbaby and everyone who faved and alerted this story. You guys are amazing!

Secondly I would like to formally apologize for not updating sooner. I have been without internet access for several reasons, some of them less pleasant than others. However I am back and barring another ruptured disc, I will try and update somewhat frequently.

This chapter is not what I would call my best, its strung out, the characters are flat and I'm scatter brained, but I did what I could under the circumstanced. If you can find it in you to read all of it and not run away screaming I will reward you with cookies!


The next few weeks were not spent in the same contrite resentment and awkwardness as the first day. Haldir spent the majority of his time secluded away in his rooms but when he did venture out he found any reason he could to be near Vanwamin for the chance to touch her. He was slowly becoming addicted to the tranquility and peace of mind she brought to him.

Vanwamin was steadily becoming more comfortable in Haldir's presence, daring to jibe him teasingly and strike back at his racism. She had settled into a routine of walking every morning. At first Haldir would come and bring her back if she got too far away but finally she was able to tell where the boundaries were. Then she would tidy the kitchen, the common area, and her room. By the time she was done it would be early afternoon and Haldir would venture from his rooms. She would make him a light lunch, usually apples, cheese, and bread. They would eat in silence then Haldir would disappear again. Day after day they went through this routine.

Occasionally Rumil or Orophin would break their tediousness much to the delight of Vanwamin. Though she much preferred the company of Rumil to Orophin. It seemed Orophin held a peculiar dislike of her. For the life of her she couldn't figure out why.


The day was warm and Vanwamin decided to skip her usual jaunt around the tree, she was having an "off" day as she liked to put it. Every so often she would wake with the mist of a memory in her mind, a song or a nursery rhyme that echoed from a dream. This morning it had been the song "Somewhere Over The Rainbow". A small child was singing it, out of tune and the with the wrong words, but it brought a great depression to her. Everything was duller than it had been before, all she could concentrate on was the bird song voice and its haunting lullaby.

She was becoming frustrated with herself for not remembering the child who possessed the happy voice. The more she thought about it, the less she could remember and with every fleeting moment a pressure built in her head. Finally she could not hold back her emotions anymore and she buried her face in one of the soft feather pillows and cried away the frustration.

In her melancholy mood she did not venture from her room and as the day wore on Haldir became concerned for her. Quietly he knocked on her door and received no response. Carefully he opened it to find her sitting in a rocking chair staring at the open blue sky. Her brown eyes were glassy and despondent. Holding his breath for reasons unknown, he crept across the room and laid a hand on her shoulder. Cursing like a sailor she jumped and grabbed Haldir's hand, intent on finding a way to throw him over the balcony. All she accomplished though was bruising her own elbow.

"Damn elf, I ought to put bells on your shoes, maybe then I could hear you." She muttered nursing her elbow. "What are you doing in here anyways?"

"I was concerned that you had not come to pester yet today," Haldir said watching her carefully. She was wearing a gray tunic with her strange blue leggins on under it, her dark hair was unkempt, and her eyes were slightly puffy. She had been crying. He didn't understand the sudden pang that ran threw him at the sight, nor did he pay heed to the need to comfort her.

Vanwamin held back a bitter remark. Her frustrations were not because of Haldir and she didn't wish to take them out on him. Instead she smiled as well as she could and said; "All is well here." She motioned to the space around her. Haldir looked at her sceptically causing her to turn away from him and lean against the railing.

"Have you ever known you've dreamed something but can't remember anything from it?" Vanwamin turned her watery brown eyes on Haldir pleadingly. He nodded. "That's what this is like, I know my past is there, but I can't recall it, no matter how much I try."

They stood in silence for while, Vanwamin gazing absently at the vast expanse of trees around her.

"Come with me," Haldir said abruptly leaving the room. Vanwamin hesitated for a second before following him. Quickly they made their way across the city and to the healing talans. There Haldir found Marrowyn straightening a room.

"Vanwamin!" She said excitedly, ignoring Haldir all together. "I was beginning to think I would never see you again."

"Oh well you know, been really busy," Vanwamin said unable to contain her sarcasm. Marrowyn laughed before noticing Haldir.

"Haldir, good to see you again."

"The same to you Marrowyn, I have a favor to ask."

"A favor?" Marrowyn said, a coy smile spreading over her face. "To what do I owe this particular pleasure?"

Haldir fought the urge to roll his eyes at the young Elleth. "Can you teach Vanwamin to heal others? Without harming herself..." Marrowyn let the question seep into her before answering.

"Haldir, I don't know if I'm a skilled enough healer for that, but maybe my father could help." With that insightful tidbit Marrowyn fled the room leaving Haldir alone with a peeved looking Vanwamin. She was glaring at him, her brown eyes narrowed to slits, her hands on her hips.

"What exactly are you doing?" She asked venomously. She wasn't so angry with the sentiment of it, but because he had not consulted her and she didn't like that, not one bit.

Haldir stepped back not seeing the mistake he made. At his silence Vanwamin dropped her arms and looked at him apathetically. "Its not that I don't understand and appreciate what your trying to do, but I like to be asked my opinion before someone offers me up for something."

Haldir shook his head, a look of bewilderment crossing his usually stoic features. Before an argument could ensue Marowyn returned leading a tall and lithe Elf. Nestarion was one of the greatest healers Lorien had ever seen. His dark hair and slightly sharper features belied his homeland of Rivendel. He was one of the few who had been personally tutored in the art of healing by Lord Elrond himself.

"Mae Govannan Haldir," He spoke with a soft and calming voice that also had an edge of pain to it. Even though he looked like he was in his early thirties Vanwamin could see the years he had lived in his eyes.

"Vanwamin, I am glad to see you are recovering well." He inclined his head in greeting.

"I am." She answered clasping her hands in front of her, feeling very formal.

"My daughter tells me that you wish to improve your healing skills."

"I do," Vanwamin said after sending Haldir a swift glare.

"This is not something that will be easily accomplished, are you sure you are capable?" His green eye reflected something akin to worry. Slowly Vanwamin nodded her head.

"Very well then, I expect you here in the morning, early, Marrowyn will be waiting for you." Nestarion then turned abruptly and left them in silence. Vanwamin felt the cold hard lump of apprehension settle in her stomach and at that moment wanted to hit Haldir very badly.


Morning had yet to dawn when Vanwamin found herself lying awake, unable to close her eyes any longer. She was nervous and to some extent giddy with the prospect of learning a new skill. Something that would undoubtedly keep her busy. She wanted to get up right then and run to the healing talans like a child on the first day of school, but didn't think Haldir would appreciate that. She had spent the entirety of yesterday in a fidgeting nervous attitude, striking out at Haldir for the most menial things.

Turning over she watched the sun break over the horizon of trees, casting the city in a pale golden light. It was then she knew why they referred to this place as the Golden Wood. Every leaf was ablaze with a yellow shimmer, dancing when the wind played through the branches. It almost made her heart ache at the sight.

Excitedly she went about dressing and doing something with her hair. It was getting long and increasingly difficult to untangle. By the time she was completely ready the sun was in full bloom and she could hear Haldir moving around in the common area. Excitedly she joined him at the table, her leg bouncing nervously.

"Have you lost control of your leg?" Haldir asked quirking and eyebrow.

"Huh? Oh," Vanwamin clutched her knee and smiled with embarrassment. "Sorry."

Marrowyn met them at the base of the healing talans, a peculiar look on her face.

"Whats wrong Wyn?" Asked Vanwamin using the nickname she had picked up.

"Oh nothing, Ada is just up to his usual peculiarities." She said moving up the stairs. "Sometimes I wonder if hes right in the head..." She continued muttering in this fashion the entire way up the stairs. Vanwamin threw a look of confusion over her shoulder and Haldir just shook his head. They climbed to the very top of the talans where only one solid platform hovered among the canopy of the tree. There were no railings, no hangings, only the small bunch of sapling branches growing from the middle of the flet offered support. Sitting in front of the branches was Nestarion, his dark hair was bound up in several intricate braids. He was seemingly meditating. In front of him was a stack of books, books that looked older than Vanwamin. Hanging from a low branch was a wicker cage, if there was anything inside it stayed silent.

"Ada," Marrowyn said with a cross look. Nestarion stayed silent. "Ada! That's enough, you know very well we're here!" Nestarion cracked open his eyes, a ghost of a smile on his lips.

"Mae Govannan Vanwamin, Haldir," He said not leaving his seated position. "Vanwamin please sit, Haldir you are not needed here, you may go about your business." Haldir inclined his head and left while Vanwamin gracelessly sat across from Nestarion. "Our first order of accord should be to test your abilities. Marrowyn if you would." He gave some sort of foppish gesture which Marrowyn rolled her eyes at as she retrieved the cage.

Nestarion put his hand into the cage and there was a gentle rustling. From its depths he pulled a beautiful red and purple bird. It was like nothing she had ever seen before, its tail was incredibly long for its small body and mottled with gold. Its eyes, an eerie ruby color, seemed to see and understand all.

"This is a Litholani Bird, she was found in the gardens, her wing is broken. Do you think you can fix it?" Nestarion held out his hand, the bird perched calmly on it. Swallowing hard Vanwamin held her hand out for the bird. It shifted nervously before turning its small head and blinking at Vanwamin. Finally it decided that she would not harm it and stepped cautiously onto her hand.

Taking a deep breath Vanwamin nestled the bird to her stomach and held her hand over its injured wing. She concentrated on healing the fractured, hollow bone, closed her eyes, and let her mind visualize the wound. After several minutes of the entire room holding their breath... nothing happened.

"I, I don't understand." Vanwamin said stroking the purring birds back.

"I was afraid something like this may happen," Nestarion said as if he did this every day. "For many, healing is a physical skill, something that is accomplished with bandages, salves, and stitching. If they have the actual ability to heal it often lies dormant, which I think is the case with you."

"But I healed Haldir..." Vanwamin said slowly, confused.

"You did, but it was something urgent, you knew he would die, this bird however will not." Nestarion carefully took the bird back. He held his hand over its wing and muttered a phrase that she couldn't understand. With an audible pop the birds wing took its rightful shape again and it chirruped loudly. Vanwamin bit her lip, understanding the meaning of his words. Disappointment however did not stay at bay. She wanted to learn to heal, not only was it something to keep her busy it was also a way to make herself useful.

"You said it was dormant, that means there's a way for me to be able to do what I did for Haldir all the time." She said enthusiastically. Nestarion nodded and got to his feet.

"It is rare for humans to possess magic of any kind, if you can use it, you will. That is why Eru ceased granting that particular gift." He lifted the bird on his hand. It stretched its ill used wings and started to soar. Vanwamin was lost for a minute in the beauty of its flight, the sun glinting crimson off its wings.

"Just because you can, doesn't mean you should," She said finally. "I understand."

"Then you are ready to begin your studies." Nestarion took his seat and handed Vanwamin a large book. "Its been translated into westron, there will be some words that are unfamiliar to you, if you need help I am sure my daughter will be more than willing." Marrowyn nodded eagerly.

"Thank you," Vanwamin said weighing the book in her hands.


They next few days were spent in silent study. Vanwamin rarely left her room and when she did it was to question a word or theory. She was to return to Nestarion the following week and she wanted nothing more than to be able to answer any questions he may throw at her. Haldir had been extraordinarily helpful to her. He would sit with her for hours explaining a foreign word to her or arguing the semantics of a particular passage in the book. She almost started to forget that this wasn't her home, that she didn't belong among these ambivalent creatures, until she started having ghastly dreams.

It was the same dream every night, a child screaming, the squealing of metal on metal and then a resounding boom that woke her without fail. She would wake in a cold sweat, a dark haze surrounding her, tears staining her face. Occasionally the fright of the dream would wake Haldir as well and he would promptly bring her a cup of tea that had some sort of magical sleeping qualities. Whatever it was it would put her to sleep almost immediately.

On this particular night Vanwamin had fallen asleep with the large book in her hands, papers covering the bed, and an oil lamp still burning. Her dreams started stagnate then in a bizarre swirl of color a small child emerged from the darkness. Dressed in winter clothing the little girl was rolling a snowball the size of a basketball across a lawn. She looked up her sapphire eyes gleaming in contrast with her rosy checks. She yelled something that was muted and then suddenly she was gone. Panic washed over Vanwamin as the white snow turned crimson all around and she began to fall.

The room around her swam in varying shades of gray and black torturing her already confused consciousness. The child from her dreams haunted the edges of her memories like an opaque ghost, nameless and silent. Her name and relation stuck in the back of her mind struggling to beat down that discriminate invisible wall. She must have been yelling again for she heard Haldir's deliberate steps outside of her door. That was the one thing he had improved for her benefit, he would walk loudly like a human as to not startle her when he approached.

The door to the room eased open and Haldir stood there holding a steaming cup of tea. The lamplight bathed him in a strange blue hue sharpening his features.

"You don't have to do this every night Haldir," Vanwamin said tentatively reaching for the cup.

"Its not done for you," He said sitting next to her on the bed. "I do it to save my ears." Vanwamin slapped him on the arm before taking a large swig of the brew.

"Your mean," She stated yawning. "Why can't I just drink this before bed? It would save us both a lot of trouble." Before she could lean back into her pillows she had fallen asleep.

"Because," Haldir answered the empty night. "Then I would have no excuse to watch you sleep." He didn't know when it had happened but at some point his arrogance had slipped away and was replaced with fascination for this human and her will. She was greedy but not for treasures or power, rather knowledge. She was ignorant; to others flaws. She was selfish with her anger and giving with her praise. That's not to say you couldn't get her riled up on occasion. Haldir had found what buttons to push in that respect and some part of him delighted in watching her cheeks stain crimson as she slammed doors. She was flawed and because of her flaws she was perfect.