Belle woke up early the following morning, heading in to the diner early to set aside some of the ingredients for her pie experiments. She made a few deep dish blueberry pies for the day's special before pulling out her mother's old notebook filled with her recipes.

There wasn't much to go on. Her mom had never been great about transcribing her recipes in any sort of coherent way. There were rarely accurate measurements of ingredients written down and bake times were "until golden brown" or "until you wash off all the dirty dishes". Belle didn't mind. She'd spent enough time in the kitchen with her mother to interpret her vague recipes and she liked to put her own spin on things anyway.

By the time Ruby and Granny arrived at the diner, she'd narrowed her selections down to her mother's Razzle Dazzle raspberry cream cheese pie, her Checkmate Checkerboard Peanut Butter pie and a new creation she was calling the "Spicy Rumplestiltskin pie", spiced rum and pumpkin topped with edible gold leaf. She figured her best bet was to make all of them and then ask her diner patrons for their opinion. It wasn't as though anyone would turn down free pie. Or she could let Max make the final decision. He had long been her biggest fan as far as her baking was concerned.

Belle bit her lip as her thoughts turned to Max. Milah knew the truth, or at least suspected it. She wasn't afraid of Milah. She didn't think the other woman would go public with her suspicions as they concerned her private life as well. She seemed to want Belle to go away quietly more than anything else. If Belle won this contest, Milah would likely get her wish. As always, that thought sent a pain straight through her heart.

She couldn't ask Max to come with her. He had a child, a life, here in Storybrooke. And she couldn't stay and be free from Gary. No, the best she could hope for was to enjoy the time she had left with Max and then pack up all her love for him in a little box, store it way in the back of her mind and hope that one day after it had gathered dust and was decrepit with age, it would disappear altogether. Unfortunately, she couldn't see that happening.

After the dinner rush that night, she retreated to her corner of the kitchen to bake the Razzle Dazzle and Checkmate Checkerboard pies. Then she stood puzzling over the right ratios of rum to pumpkin for her Spicy Rumplestiltskin. By the time the diner closed, she was on her third version, still not satisfied with the outcome.

At 10:30, Max snuck in the back door as was typical for Friday nights. He peeked over Belle's shoulder as she rolled out her crust.

"What are you working on?"

"Something new," she said excitedly. "I don't know if it's going to work or not, but you can be my guinea pig and tell me how it tastes."

"I look forward to getting a taste of your pie," Max said, nuzzling her neck, his arms going around her from behind.

Belle giggled, shrugging him off but brushing a kiss against his cheek in apology.

"I don't have a moment to waste," she said, skirting around Max to grab the cinnamon from the pantry. "I have to perfect this pie by next week."

"Why the deadline?"

Belle dusted her hands off on her apron, pulling the flyer from her pocket and smoothing it out on the countertop.

"Pie contest at the state fair at the end of the month," she said, jabbing her finger against the paper. "The grand prize is $20,000. I need to figure out which pie I'm making by next week so I can have a solid week perfecting it."

Max let out a low whistle, picking up the flyer to read it over. "Well, you're sure to win no matter what you make."

Belle smiled at him, patting her hand against his cheek. "That's sweet but it's also not true. The competition is stiff. I have to make something positively scrumptious."

"Then you should cover yourself in whipped cream and cherry compote, because I can't imagine anything more scrumptious than you," he said, flirting shamelessly.

Belle raised an eyebrow. "Somehow I think that would get me disqualified."

Max snorted, going to look at the razzle dazzle and checkerboard pies on the counter.

"And these are?" he asked, giving her a lopsided smile.

"For you," Belle said with a nod. "A taste test. You get to decide which pie should be entered in the contest."

Max placed a hand against his chest, his face suddenly solemn. "I will take to my task with all the dignity bestowed upon my office."

Belle chuckled, rolling her eyes as Max helped himself to a slice of the peanut butter pie.

He let out a groan at the first bite of pie, his head lolling back with a look of bliss on his face.

"This is the one," he said, gesturing at the pie with his fork.

"How can you be sure? You haven't even tried the others?"

Max took another bite, another obscene noise coming from him that was a bit too close to the sounds he made when her mouth was around his cock.

"It only takes a taste, Belle," he said.

"Well, I want you to try the Spicy Rumple when it's perfected. Then we'll see."

Max coughed. "The what?"

"Oh," Belle said, blushing slightly as she poured Captain Morgan into the pumpkin mixture she was preparing. "It's what I've named this pie. The Spicy Rumplestiltskin. Seemed to fit."

Max actually laughed aloud at that.

"With a name like that, how could you lose?"

Belle cast a smile over her shoulder, going back to mixing the rum and pumpkin.

"If I win, it'll be enough money to afford a new life somewhere far away from here," she said offhandedly.

Gold had gone very still and Belle glanced over her shoulder at him. He swallowed, setting down his pie.

"And me," he said.

They hadn't discussed their feelings for each other, not really. There was something there, an understanding that neither had dared give name to. Belle knew in the very depths of her soul that she loved him. But she also knew there was no future for them, not here, not in this town.

"I can't stay here," she said plainly, shaking her head.

"Why not?"

Belle turned to look at him, silently pleading for him not to make her answer that question. She couldn't tell him the truth, not the whole of it. She couldn't tell him that she feared Gary would snap again like he had the night he found out she was pregnant. She couldn't tell him that she feared to raise a child in a home with such violence, the same way she had been raised. She couldn't tell him that Gary would kill her rather than let her go. She couldn't burden him with that. She loved him too much to let him know how wretched she truly was.

"Would you leave Milah?" she asked instead. "Would you ask for a divorce so we could be together? No more hiding, Max. We could go on a date. Kiss in public. We could let everyone know we're together. Would you leave her?"

She knew the answer even as she asked it. If Max wanted out of his marriage, he'd have done so already. He didn't have any of the reasons to stay that Belle did. He was financially secure, had a job that could support both he and his child. Milah could be callous and cruel but Belle doubted she'd strangle Max to death if he served her with divorce papers. He had the type of freedom she could only dream of and yet he stayed.

Max closed his eyes, turning his face away from Belle.

"I can't," he said, his voice little more than a whisper.

She knew the answer was coming and it still didn't stop her heart from breaking, the feeling utterly foreign. It felt as though she couldn't breathe, a hand pushing down on her chest and squeezing until her lungs flattened and her heart burst.

She nodded, tears springing to her eyes. This was why they didn't talk about their feelings. This was why it was so much easier to leave things at the physical. It hurt too damn much to love someone who couldn't or wouldn't feel the same.

"I can't stay and you can't leave," Belle said sadly. "What a doomed pair we are."

"You can stay," Gold insisted, turning back to her.

"And what?" Belle demanded. "Be your kept woman? Go from one set of shackles to a new shinier pair?"

"No!" Gold protested.

"Then what, Max?" she asked. "What exactly are you proposing? I'm supposed to stay here in town with my ex-husband and my baby and you'll try to steal away from your family to give me a few moments of your time a week? Because that doesn't work for me."

"That's not what I want," he said with a shake of his head.

"Then leave her!" she snapped.

Max stared at her, his mouth falling open. She'd never been so forceful before. Never demanded anything of him.

"I'm sorry," she said, wrapping her arms around herself. "I have no right to demand that. You never made me any promises."

"Belle…" he said, his voice achingly tender. He reached for her, his hand sliding down her arm and she shook him off, ignoring the hurt in his eyes.

"I'm not stupid," she continued. "I know men don't leave their wives for women like me."

"That's not it," he protested. "Sweetheart you're…everything."

A wet bubble of laughter erupted from her throat, sounding slightly hysterical to her ears. She wasn't everything. She was barely something, clinging to it with her fingernails before she became nothing.

"I planned to," Max said. "Leave her. Once Neal graduated from high school we'd get a divorce and I'd be free to do as I wanted but…things have changed."

Belle took a deep breath, looking up at Max from beneath her wet lashes. It didn't mean much. Two years might as well be a lifetime. She had to get out now, no matter what. But now even the hope of coming back for him in two years time was being yanked away.

"What? What things?"

Max licked his lips, staring down at the handle of his cane, held loosely in his grip. It seemed as though he'd rather do anything than answer her.

"Milah's pregnant," he said finally.

Belle dropped the spoon in her hand. It landed on the kitchen floor with a splatter of pumpkin, punctuating the bombshell he'd just dropped.

Belle thought back to the time she'd seen Milah in the OBGYN's office the day of her first appointment. Could she have been pregnant all this time? Milah didn't look pregnant, while Belle had ballooned with the baby in her belly. But that could be a case of losing the genetic lottery on top of every other loss she'd sustained in her life.

"I – I thought you said the two of you hadn't been intimate in…" she trailed off. She'd no right to be jealous. She was married as well.

"We haven't," he said miserably. "Milah knows exactly what she's doing, alright? Neal is a sophomore in high school and she knows I've only stayed this long for him. A few years ago, before I gave up smoking, I had a cancer scare. My doctor advised me to bank any sperm if I planned to have more children. Milah apparently visited the doctor without my knowledge."

"She impregnated herself to keep you?" Belle asked, aghast.

Gold nodded.

"Max, do you know how insane that sounds? That's…that's…" she trailed off, unable to find the words. She knew Milah would do whatever she could to keep Max tethered to her. She'd seen it first hand. But she could never have imagined this.

"A few months ago she tried to get it done the old fashioned way," Max said, leaning back against one of the kitchen countertops. "But I refused her. It was the night we came to Granny's, just the two of us. I knew she wanted something from me I just wasn't sure what. I thought she was offering sex in exchange for something monetary but I suppose she really just wanted me to get her pregnant."

Belle shook her head again, as if denying this news could somehow make it go away.

"You're an attorney, surely there's some legal recourse for her doing this without your knowledge."

Max looked miserable, defeated. He weighed his cane in one hand looking for all the world as though he wanted to smash it against something.

"None of that changes the fact that she's pregnant with my child," he said.

"And couples with children divorce all the time," Belle pointed out. "If this isn't grounds for a divorce I don't know what is."

"And look what it does to those children. I grew up in a broken home and I don't want to do that to any child of mine."

"So raising a child together when you're both miserable is a better option?"

"Raising a child with both their parents is the better option. When you're a parent, you can't just be selfish!" he yelled. Then he motioned at her baby bump. "Maybe soon you'll understand that."

Belle dropped a hand to her stomach, shielding herself and her child from his words.

"Why do you think I'm leaving?" she demanded. "Because my child deserves better than to have Gary imposed on them from birth. I didn't plan for them and I didn't want them, but they're mine and I have a duty to protect them. If I was selfish, I would stay."

Gold looked cowed by her words, but there was a fire inside Belle's breast and it had to escape somehow. She was so tired of everyone else thinking they knew what was best for her. She knew her own mind, her heart, and if she didn't let it out now, she would burst into flame.

"You think I don't understand what it means to sacrifice for a child?" she cried. "What I understand is that my father drank. I understand that he came home at least twice a week and yelled at my mother, threw her on the ground, choked her, beat her if he was angry enough. What I understand is hiding in my bedroom closet when they would fight. What I understand is that I would have given anything, absolutely anything, for my mother to have left him and I will give up everything to keep my child from experiencing one moment of what I had to deal with. Even you."

She spun around, staring at the scorch marks on the large, industrial grill. She couldn't look at him anymore.

"Belle," he said tentatively. "Does he…does Gary…does he" he trailed off as if too horrified to give voice to the question.

"No," she lied, crossing her arms against her chest. "But abuse doesn't have to make you bleed does it?"

He let out a sigh, shaking his head.

"I'm sorry," he said. "I didn't know it was that bad. You should leave him."

"I intend to," Belle agreed. "And you should leave her too. Not for me. For yourself."

Max looked stricken, his eyes falling from her face to the linoleum floor. He traced the black and white squares with the end of his cane, lost in his own thoughts.

"I don't know what you want me to say," he finally said, sadly. "She's pregnant with my child. I can't abandon them."

"No," Belle agreed, shaking her head. "That's not the kind of man you are."

They stared at each other, neither speaking, for a long moment. It felt as though this were the end of something. That some final decision was about to be made and there would be no going back. Neither of them were quite prepared to let go.

"They're lucky to have you," Belle said, breaking the silence. "Neal and this new baby. They're really lucky to have a father who cares so much about them."

Her voice broke on her words and she turned away, not wanting Max to see her tears.

She felt his hands on her shoulders, his thumbs stroking lightly through her shirt, and she took a shuddering breath.

"I guess this is why we've avoided this conversation," she said, swiping away the tears.

"It's a difficult one," he said. His hands slid down across her shoulder blades, settling on her hips as he buried his face in her hair, breathing her in. "I'm so sorry, sweetheart."

She turned in his arms, wrapping her arms around his neck and reaching up to kiss him. It was a gentle thing, a brush of lips, the slide of her tongue along the seam of his lips. He kissed her back, the salt of her tears clinging to their lips. Before she was ready to, Belle pulled away, pressing her forehead against his and closing her eyes.

"I love you," she whispered, her voice soft in the otherwise empty kitchen.

Max's hands tightened on her hips as he dropped a kiss on the tip of her nose. "Oh, Belle, I love you too."

She swallowed a sob. If he didn't love her, this would have been so much easier to do.

"Maybe somewhere out there is a universe where we could be together," she said, her hands twisting in the lapels of his suit jacket. "But this one isn't it."

"What?" he asked, his voice tremulous. "What are you saying?"

"You love your children," she said with a nod, looking up at him. "More than you love me which is exactly as it should be. And I've taken you away from them long enough."

"No," Max said, shaking his head, holding a finger up to his lips as though he could silence her and save himself the pain.

"I love you," she cried, hoping she could say it enough to soften the blow of what she was doing. She wanted Max to know he was loved, that he was worthy of it no matter how Milah had spent decades trying to convince him otherwise. "But you have a baby coming and I have a pie to make."

She pulled out of his arms, going back to her pie. "Go home, Mr. Gold," she said, her voice final.

She focused on whipping the drunken rum topping for her pie, barely hearing the scuffle of Max's cane or the slam of the kitchen door as he left. The tears continued to fall and she added a pinch of salt to the pumpkin, folding in her sadness and broken dreams. Once she'd placed the pie in the oven, leaning back against the kitchen island, her chest felt less tight, her feelings baking away in sugar, butter covered pieces. It was amazing what baking could do.


She didn't cross paths with Max again for a week, which was probably for the best. They each had too much going on in their own lives for any kind of constructive conversation to happen between them. Instead of crying over him, Belle poured her anger and frustration and sadness into her baking, finally getting the Spicy Rumplestiltskin up to scratch. She offered Ruby a piece as her new designated taste tester and Ruby's knees buckled at the first bite as she declared it "better than sex". Ariel took offense at that until she'd tried a piece as well.

"I see fireworks!" she exclaimed as she fell back onto a diner stool, her cheeks flushed and eyes sparkling.

Granny had been less effusive, taking a bite and declaring it adequate. But Belle had caught her sneaking a second slice of pie during her lunch break.

With her pie perfected, all there was left to do was wait for the big day and Belle had never been so nervous about anything in all her life. Ruby and Ariel had decided a girls' night was in order to take her mind off things and organized a get together at Ariel's apartment the Thursday before the State Fair. She was looking forward to a little time with her friends and she rushed home from the diner that evening, hoping to change and make Gary a quick dinner before she could escape the apartment again.

She'd pulled out all the ingredients for spaghetti Bolognese, chopping garlic and onion as she browned her ground beef. She had the sauce simmering, digging around for her pasta pot to start on the noodles, when Gary walked in.

"Smells good," he said as he grabbed a beer from the fridge, prying off the top and tossing it at the trashcan.

"Thanks," Belle said, surfacing with her pot and carrying it over to the sink. She was feeling almost light hearted today. She felt good about her chances in the contest and she had a night with friends planned. Her bus ticket to Bangor was booked, and she was so close to escaping Gary she could taste it. She knew that kind of hope was a dangerous thing, but she couldn't help it from buoying her spirits, no matter how her heart ached at the thought of never seeing Max again.

"I had an interesting day today," Gary said, sucking down a long sip of beer.

"Oh?" Belle asked distractedly, going to fill her pot with water from the kitchen tap.

"Yeah, do you know Milah Gold?" he asked. Belle nearly dropped the half filled pot in the sink.

"Um, I've seen her around but I wouldn't say I know her. Why?"

Gary shrugged. "She's a real nice lady. Talked to her a few days ago."

Belle finished filling the pot, placing it on the lit burner and adding some salt to the water.

"Why were you talking to Milah Gold?"

Gary waggled an eyebrow at her, his lips turning up in a cruel smirk. "Is that jealousy I hear?" he asked.

"No," Belle said, turning back to her dinner preparations.

Gary leaned back against the counter, crossing his beefy arms across his chest.

"Eh, no need anyway. I'm pretty sure Gold would evict us if I was sleeping with his wife."

Belle swallowed. "No doubt."

"She's knocked up anyway," he continued, oblivious to Belle's inner turmoil. "Due not long after you are, but she's way skinnier than you."

Belle rolled her eyes, ignoring the jab.

"So…what did she want?" she prompted.

"She gave me a lead on a job," Gary said, taking another swig from his beer. "A friend of hers works down on the docks and needs an extra hand. It's good money, and she said the job's mine, pending a physical."

Belle nodded, her heart in her throat. What the hell was Milah doing meddling in their lives?

"I guess she heard I was looking for work and went out of her way to help," Gary said and Belle just nodded again, staring down into the pot of water and wondering what else Milah might have said to Gary. He didn't seem angry so it was possible she hadn't said anything about her suspicions about Belle's relationship with Max. But she knew too well that Gary could turn on a dime and it was unusual enough for him to talk her ear off while she cooked.

"I thought you'd be more excited," Gary said, coming to stand behind Belle at the stove. "The way you've been nagging me about a job."

"I am excited," Belle said, snapping out of her stupor and reaching for the box of pasta to add to the boiling water. Gary caught her hand, stopping her.

"Forget about cooking," he said, his deep voice rumbling in her ear, the heat of his body oppressive against her back. "Let me take you out tonight to celebrate."

Belle shook her head. "I can't," she said. "Ariel is having a few girls over, remember? You said I could go."

"Right," Gary griped, stepping back from her. Belle took a deep breath once there was distance between them, pouring the pasta into the water.

"I don't like those girls you work with," he said. "Bunch of sluts especially that Ruby. They're a bad influence. Now that I got a new job maybe you should quit yours. Stay at home baking pies for me."

Belle knew better than to protest, just stood there over the stove, her heart beating faster and hoping Gary would just leave the kitchen. Luck obviously wasn't on her side tonight as Gary finished off his beer, putting the empty bottle down on the counter before grabbing another one from the fridge.

"You don't have the job yet," she said, latching on to his earlier words. "You said it was pending a physical."

She didn't doubt Gary would pass with flying colors. Despite his heavy drinking, he was in fantastic shape. She'd seen some of the guys who worked down at the docks and Gary could probably run circles around them. And she was glad he'd found employment. She didn't want him to be destitute when she left. She wasn't vindictive.

"I already had it," Gary said and Belle spun around to face him. "The job is mine. I start Monday."

"Oh," Belle said, her brow creasing. "Then why not lead with that?"

Gary chuckled, shaking his head lightly. He pushed himself away from the counter, coming toward Belle and tilting her face up to look at him, his fingers lightly gripping her chin.

"Because I wanted to ask you a question first, darling," Gary said, his grip tightening on her chin until it was painful.

Belle froze, her eyes widening.

Gary bent down so he was on eye level with her, his breath fanning out across her face and reeking of beer. She wondered how many he'd had today.

"Just how fucking stupid do you think I am?" he spat, spittle flying from his mouth.

Gone was the man who had lightly ribbed her for jealousy just a few minutes ago and in his place was the monster once more. Belle cursed herself for not realizing. She'd thought Gary seemed off, but she hadn't listened to her instincts. She should have run the moment he entered the kitchen.

He grabbed Belle by the arms, hauling her against him.

"Answer me, Belle!"

"I don't think you're stupid!" she countered, but Gary just gripped her arms harder, shaking her.

"Don't lie to me!" he roared, throwing her back against the kitchen table so hard it took her breath away. She instinctively dropped a hand to her stomach, shielding her child, but Gary turned away, pacing the kitchen floor.

Milah must have told him something after all. He was waiting, hoping she'd come clean or else playing with her like a cat would a mouse. It didn't matter. All that mattered was that Gary knew about her affair and he was going to kill her for it.

Belle's eyes darted around the kitchen, looking for an avenue of escape or something to defend herself with. Gary was standing between her and the stove. The exit to the living room was to her right, but she'd have to run past Gary to get there.

"What are you talking about?" Belle asked, stalling for time.

Gary rounded on her, eyes flashing.

"I got some interesting news this morning," he growled out. "The results of my physical."

Belle shook her head, not comprehending. If this wasn't about Milah, how could he know? If Gary had found out he had an STD, it didn't come from her. She'd just had blood work done at her last doctor's appointment.

"They checked everything, and I mean everything," Gary continued. "Fucking fruit doctor made me drop my pants and all. But they called today to break some bad news to me. That I'm in perfect health but for one thing: my swimmers don't work and I'm fucking sterile."

Belle's stomach dropped, the room swimming before her eyes. She sagged against the table, unable to believe what she was hearing. This was a complication she'd never foreseen.

"Well, I laughed in their faces and said they must have made a mistake because my wife is pregnant right fucking now," Gary said with a shake of his head. "I'm so fucking sure you'd never betray me that I'm arguing with the goddamned doctor, Belle! But they said there was definitely no mistake and it'd take a bloody miracle for me to have a baby. So answer me another question. Who the fuck's baby is that?"

He grabbed her by the wrist, wrenching her forward as he jabbed his finger hard into her swollen abdomen. Belle tried to pull away, but his fingers just dug harder into her wrist, holding her tight.

"It's yours, Gary, I swear!" she exclaimed. He shoved her hard against the pantry door, the knob digging painfully into her lower back, but Belle didn't dare move, folding in on herself, trying to make herself as small as possible.

"Goddamn it, Belle!" Gary yelled, grabbing the pot of boiling pasta from the stove behind him and throwing it hard across the room. "Tell me the truth!"

Belle leapt out of the way of the boiling pasta water with a squeal, a few droplets hitting her bare ankle and stinging her skin.

She was trembling. She'd never seen Gary like this before. The closest he'd ever come to hitting her, he'd stopped when she told him she was pregnant. But if he thought this wasn't his child, there'd be nothing to stop him this time.

She eyed the doorway to the kitchen, wondering if she could get through it quickly enough. But Gary's hulking form was blocking her way. She was trapped.

"Why would I ever cheat on you?" she asked, appealing to Gary's pride. She risked taking a step toward him thinking maybe she could make it to the other side of the kitchen if she kept him talking. "You're the best looking guy in town! Who would I possibly have slept with when I have you?"

Gary's chest was heaving, his teeth clenched as though he was in physical pain.

"Those doctors are idiots," she insisted, her hands up in front of her bracingly. "They don't know anything. If they say it would take a miracle, this is it."

Gary looked down at her belly then back to her face.

"Promise me you're telling the truth," he demanded, his eyes wild. "Promise me you're mine."

"I'm yours, Gary," she said, the words sinking in to her skin, weighing her down until she felt that she'd never be able to breathe again.

Gary sank to his knees in front of her, gripping on to her hips with both hands.

"I don't know what I'd do if I ever lost you, Belle," he said, burying his face against her belly. "I'd kill myself. I can't lose you. I love you so damn much."

Belle shut her eyes, taking a deep breath as a tear slid down her cheek. "I know," she said, her hands clenching in tight fists at her sides so hard that her nails bit into the skin of her palms.

"Call Ariel," Gary said, his voice muffled against her shirt.

"What?"

Gary looked up at her, tears in his blue eyes, still clinging to her like a child.

"Call Ariel and tell her you're not going to make it tonight," he pleaded. "Tell her we're celebrating my new job. I need you here, Belle."

He took her wrist in his hands, pressing a kiss to the red skin where he'd held her so tightly. "I need you," he said again. "I love you so much, baby."

Belle nodded, numbly. Two more days, she thought. On Saturday she would win that prize money and she would never come back here again.