Sam was use to going without sleep. She could work for days with nothing more than twenty-minute power naps every thirty hours or so, and that was under good conditions. She could, and had, gone longer with no sleep at all under extreme circumstances. But there was something totally different about sleep deprivation when an infant causes it. Her head felt like it was stuffed with cotton wool instead of a brain, thinking was hard, and functioning was harder. When she went to bed the simple act of laying down felt like the ultimate luxury. At least she wasn't suffering alone. She knew Janet was in the same boat and even a little worse off because she was Dani's supply of milk.
Despite how tired Sam was she wouldn't trade the last few weeks for anything. She'd taken vacation days so she could be home with Janet and Dani while Janet was on maternity leave. Sam was in awe of the tiny new being she was watching develop into a person right before her eyes. Dani had gone from a helpless newborn whose only concerns were food, sleep and cleanliness to a bright eyed six week old who's discovered her fingers, an ability to grasp at things, and a love of hear mama's voice. Sam's new favorite thing was watching Janet cuddle with Dani while singing to her, though she did question Janet's choices of songs from Chicago, the musical not the band, and Tom Jones.
For the first time since Dani was born it was the warmth of the sun that woke Sam. She stretched, mindful not to disturb the smaller body beside her even in the moments before full consciousness, and turned her head to look at the clock on the nightstand. It took a few seconds for the digital numbers to register. Sitting up with a jolt Sam reached over to shake Janet awake, "Janet, it's nine thirty, wake up!"
Janet grumbled and snuggled further into her pillow and the blankets.
"Janet, we slept all night." Sam said as she started getting out of bed. Sam, being Sam, had done a lot of reading and research about babies, and she knew babies as young as Dani didn't sleep through the night.
Dark eyes popped open instantly. It took a few moments before Janet's thoughts caught up with her but once she was thinking she was moving to get out of bed as well. "She's to young to sleep through the night."
Sam smiled as she handed Janet her robe. "Maybe she's gifted and she's going to pick up on things before other kids her age."
"Wouldn't that be nice?" Janet replied as they made their way to the nursery. They'd done the room in pink and brown, with a turtle theme that Cassie picked out. Over the crib in big puffy letters was Dani's name, and around the room were little memos from the people in their lives who loved the little girl. Jack have given her a stuff dog in SG1 BDUs. It even had a pair a sunglasses just like the one's Jack wore, and Sam still had no idea where he'd found the tiny P90 it carried. Hammond had a mobile made with soft plushy representations of a large Prometheus surrounded by smaller 302s. Teal'c had asked Ishta to make several of the woven dreamcatcher like talismans her tribe of female Jaffa posted around their camps, the ones that meant strength, wisdom, courage, and hope. Sam had put one on each wall; hope hanging just above Dani's name. Jonas had gotten her a dream machine that projected either constellations or fish on the ceiling and walls while playing soft music or ocean sounds. Daniel's book was on top of the short three-shelf bookcase with his favorite fountain pen, which Sam sort of nicked from his office. Several pages had already been written in using that pen, and many more would soon follow.
The blanket Daniel had given them should have been in the crib but wasn't because Dani wasn't in her crib. There was a flash of panic in Sam's chest that felt like someone shoving a hot iron straight through her. There was a phantom of fear that never really went away for Sam, a fear that someone would find out the truth and take Dani to use her the way Conrad had tried to use Sam, or Nirrti had used Cassandra. Janet shared the same concerns but without Sam's personal experience she was able to shake off that moment of fear and panic and think clearly a little quicker than Sam.
After checking Cassie's room and finding it empty as well they headed downstairs. Sure enough there were their girls, in the living room safe and sound. Cassie was sitting on the couch with her feet propped up so her knees were drawn up. Dani was on her sister's thighs, both little hands gripped around Cassie's index fingers. Cassie was moving Dani's arms in gentle stretches while telling her a story. Cassie liked telling Dani about how Sam had saved her on Hanka and how Janet had protected her when she'd been sick.
When Cassie looked up to see her Mom and Sam she smiled at them. "Feeling better?"
It took a moment but Janet realized what had happened and she beamed a proud smile at Cassie. "You took care of her all night?"
"You two were so tired." Cassie said as she picked her sister up from her thighs so she could hand her to Janet. "Sam put prune juice in her tea last night and drank it without flinching, and you put the cordless phone in the dishwasher. We need a new cordless phone by the way." She smiled as she watched Janet cuddle the baby. "So I turned off the baby monitor, set the port-a-crib up in my room and kept her with me all night."
Sam flopped onto the couch beside the teen and pulled Cassie into her arms, nearly into her lap, as she hugged her. "You are an amazing kid."
"I know." Cassie said with a playful grin.
The first thing Sam did when she went back to work was put a picture of Dani on her desk right next to the picture she had of Cassie. Officially Sam was Dani's godmother, with Jack being her godfather, but if one looked closely enough they could see Sam in the girl. Dani's hair had darkened over her nearly two months of life. Janet said it would be a beautiful chestnut brown when she was older. She also had Janet's tea stained complexion. She had Sam's nose, and when she smiled she had Janet's smile with Sam's dimples. The most telling part though was Dani's eyes. She had Sam's bright blue eyes, in color and shape. They were eyes that were beautiful on the fair blonde but outright striking on her dark haired daughter. One look into the child's eyes and one could see Sam. Thankfully no one brought it up and the rumor about Dani's parentage gave them a bit of a safety net. Scuttlebutt was that Doctor Fraiser's baby girl was Daniel's.
There was no such thing as easing back into work when it came to the SGC. Janet had been back to work for all of two days when Jonas started having visions of the future. She'd grown to really like the young man so when she discovered a brain tumor most likely caused by Nirrti she once again regretted that it hadn't been her to kill the goa'uld. Despite the guilt she felt for going back to work and leaving Dani with a nanny, and the ache of missing her baby, Janet loved being back in her infirmary. Even the frustration she felt over Jonas' refusal to treat the tumor was a welcome sensation. As Jonas continued putting off having surgery Janet found herself fighting the desire to smack the young man. Not only was he putting his own life on the line, he'd managed to talk Sam out of a mission because he said she'd get hurt on it and then Sam ended up getting badly hurt right there on base. Janet had to finally put her foot down at the eleventh hour, and took Jonas into surgery. Having a member of SG1 recovering in her infirmary finally let Janet feel like she was really back.
During Jonas' recovery Sam was able to get caught up on her lab work. She only worked late twice and both times it nearly killed her to be in her lab and not at home, which was totally weird for her. Her work still excited her, it always would, but her Dad had been right. Discovering something new out in the universe still filled Sam with awe, but it didn't make her feel the way she felt when she discovered something new about her daughter. Dani had changed Sam's perspective on a lot of things. When she first started at the SGC is was all about exploring and finding new tech to play with. Then her work became keeping Cassie, and then Janet safe. Now with Dani that desire was intensified because Dani was brand new and had a whole life stretched out in front of her. Sam had to make sure that wide-open future was always there for Dani. That's what was on Sam's mind as she stepped trough the Gate to Abydos.
What passed through Janet's mind more sharply then ever before was the fear that there was a chance Sam would go through that Gate and never come back. There had always been some level of anxiety, even back when they were just friends, but now it was almost overwhelming because she wasn't just worried for her sake, but for Dani's. She didn't want to raise their daughter alone, she didn't want to tell Dani stories of Sam; she wanted Dani to experience Sam, to know her other mother. But like Sam, Janet knew the importance of keeping the planet safe, of defeating those who would do them harm. So when Sam went off to find the Eye of Ra Janet could do little more than wish her good luck and kiss her goodbye in the privacy of her office before she left for the Gate room.
They'd lost the Eye f Ra but had saved a tablet that according to Daniel, who Sam was still surprised to find out hadn't been a figment of her imagination while trying to get back to Janet, was a clue on how to find the lost city of the Ancients. While Jonas worked on translating it Sam did what she could to help keep tabs on Anubis. When she would get home at night she would spend hours just watched Dani sleep.
"Hey." Janet said softly as she came up behind Sam in the doorway of the nursery. She put her hand on Sam's back and began rubbing circles. "Are you ok?"
"Yeah, I'm fine." Sam answered. She was quiet for a moment and then added, "I'm kind of envious of all those parents out there who don't know what we know."
Janet nodded her understanding. "It's scary." She agreed. "But you're out there fighting to keep her safe, so it's a little less scary, for me at least."
"You have a lot of faith in me." Sam said softly.
"I always have." Janet replied as she leaned into Sam.
Sam put her arm around her girlfriend and sighed softly. "I have a feeling I'm going to need that faith. Things are going to get harder before they get better."
The last thing Sam expected to find on their search for the Lost City was Daniel. Jonas had spent every waking moment working on the tablet they retrieved from Abydos. He thought he had figured it out, that it wasn't the Lost City but the City of the Lost. He thought they had a gate address so several teams were sent to explore the ruins found on the planet after sending a MALP. When one of the backup teams reported finding something of interest, a living human Daniel who didn't know who he was, wasn't what any of them were expecting.
When Jack failed at getting through to Daniel Sam gave it a try. She did her best to convince him that he was a good man, a kind, compassionate man who more than likely was kicked out by the Ancients for the very humanity that had attracted him to them in the first place. He was finding it hard to believe so Sam smiled at him and said, "Come back with us, Daniel. I'll show you just how much I believe what I just said. You are a good man, and if that's a flaw to the Ancients then that shows badly on them, not you."
He promised to think about it.
Something she said must have rang true because Daniel came home with them. He was quickly whisked off to medical for a complete exam. Janet had been warned that he was coming but when he walked in it still took her by surprise. "Daniel."
He seemed a little uncomfortable at first but there seemed to be something about Janet, like there had been with Sam that put him at ease. The logical medical part of Janet was telling her this was impossible. She'd watched Daniel's body rot away from radiation poisoning. She watched the essence of him leave his body and then leave this world. Now he was sitting on one of her gurneys watching her. His skin was warm to the touch, his pulse stead and strong, the sound of his heart thunderous in her ears. When the results started coming back from the tests she ran she could hardly believe her eyes. Everything matched up perfectly to the tests and scans Janet had run at Daniel's last complete physical, the one she herself gave him just days before SG1 went to Jonas' home world.
Later while sitting at her desk with pen in hand Janet stared at the blank form in front of her trying to find the words to write her report on Daniel. She was so lost in her task that she didn't hear the knock on her office door, nor did she notice Sam walk in. It wasn't until she felt the warmth of Sam's hand on her shoulder that Janet blinked and looked up at the blonde.
"Hey," Sam said gently.
"Hi." Janet replied as she reached up to put her hand on Sam's.
"No need to ask how you are about the whole Daniel thing." Sam said as she looked down into Janet's eyes. "You're just as thrown for a loop as the rest of us."
Janet was quiet for a moment as she tried to find a way to explain how she felt. "We are surrounded by science and technology, both human and alien. We are fully aware of the influence the goa'uld had on religion and social ideals. It would be so easy with what we know, what we do, to write all of that off. And yet, Sam, you and I have a child together and now Daniel's back from the dead. These things are the very definition of miraculous."
"I think sometimes we forget that one of the biggest parts of our jobs is to believe in the unbelievable." Sam said with a soft smile.
"This is pretty unbelievable." Janet replied and returned Sam's smile with one of her own.
"But he's Daniel, right?" Sam asked.
Janet nodded. "He's Daniel."
The threat level was to high for Sam to follow through on what she said to Daniel in his tent. Things moved ahead at a quick pace and before she knew it she was in a F-302 waiting for the signal to take out Anubis' super weapon. Sam was able to destroy the weapon but before they could get Daniel and Jonas off Anubis' ship it jumped into hyperspace. Sam sat in the cockpit of her fighter thinking, not again, she couldn't loose him again. When Daniel and Jonas ringed into the warehouse on Langara Sam wasn't sure if she wanted to hug Daniel or slap him.
In the end Anubis escaped but they managed to deal him a crippling blow. Jonas was shot in action but it wasn't anything Janet couldn't fix. On his way to the Gate room after deciding to go back to Langara Jonas stopped by the infirmary to say goodbye. He tapped on her office door and smiled. "Got a minute, Doc?"
"For you, I think I can find one." Janet replied as she stood up and walked around her desk. Without thinking she fussed over his wound to make sure it was healing.
Jonas couldn't help but smile. "I just wanted to say goodbye and to thank you."
"Patching you guys up is what I do, Jonas." Janet replied. "You don't have to thank me but it's nice to hear."
"I am grateful for the medical care but that's not what I mean." Jonas said softly. "You were the first person here to accept me. You made me feel welcome. You let me be your friend. Thank you."
Janet hugged the young man. "We'll always be friends, Jonas."
"I hope so." Jonas replied. When they stepped away from the hug he smiled softly. "Give Dani a hug for me?"
"I will, I promise." Janet said with a nod.
Now that they had a moment to catch their breathes Sam was finally able to get to showing Daniel just how much he meant to them. His memories had started trickling back slowly but it still frustrated him that so much of his past was still a hazy blur. Sam hoped knowing he was loved would help. Sam knocked on the doorframe of Daniel's office and smiled, "How are you doing?"
"I'm good." Daniel replied. "I think."
Stepping into the room Sam moved closer to the table Daniel was sitting at. "Its all in there, Daniel." She saw the doubt in his eyes. "Do you remember when I said I'd show you how much you meant to us?" She smiled before turning towards the door. "Janet."
Janet walked in carrying Dani who was all wide-eyed wonder as she took in her surroundings. They didn't bring the baby on base often but neither she nor Sam could stand it any longer. They wanted Daniel to meet his namesake. Sam gave her a huge grin as she handed the baby to her.
Turning to Daniel with Dani in her arms Sam said, "Daniel Jackson meet Danielle Fraiser." Sam beamed as she waved Dani's little hand at Daniel while nuzzling her nose against the baby's neck. "Dani, meet your Uncle Daniel."
Daniel took the baby in, his eyes darting between her and her mothers. Hearing her name, something warm bubbled up inside him. He reached out a hand to the baby and Dani didn't even hesitate in grabbing hold of his fingers. He smiled. "Dani?"
"Without you and Sam making the Gate work we wouldn't have her." Janet said softly. "So we named her after you and I named her after Sam. Danielle Samantha Fraiser." She was still holding on to the hope that some day she'd get to add Carter to that list of names. "You're not just our friend, Daniel. You're family."
He was quiet for a long time as he played with the baby in Sam's arms. She was tiny, perfect, and favored both of them. He smiled. "I told you she'd be as pretty as her moms."
Janet's eyes went a little wide and then she gave him a huge beaming smile. "You did."
He silently asked permission from Sam to hold her and Sam easily handed Dani to him. Daniel had tears in his eyes as he smiled down at the baby with his name. "I'm so happy to meet you Dani. I didn't think I was going to get to, ya know." He kissed her forehead and smiled at his friends. "Ok, this makes getting deascended worth it."
"Welcome home, Daniel." Sam said and she kissed his cheek.
"No more dying, ok?" Janet added as she took her turn to welcome him home.
Daniel chuckled which made Dani gurgle out a little baby laugh of her own. "I'll do my best."
