Author's note: Oh my God! Thank you so, so, so much to the new review from asdf. And thank you so much to natsusora for the story follow! I know, it's insane how there aren't enough of Ken/Sou anywhere on the internet, and believe me, I've tried looking everywhere for it! I can't even find any doujinshi between Kenshin and Soujiro, only a couple of screenshots of some manga covers of them together and no links or sources of it anywhere. Ugh! The frustration! Anyhow, I'm glad you liked this story so far, and maybe you can spread the word around in any RK fandoms that you might be in about the wonders of my Rou/Sou fic so that I can get more hits, if you'd like? No pressure, of course! Thank you, again!

I can't spoil what will happen in terms of Kenshin's marriage with Kaoru and his relationship with Soujiro, what I will say is that each update will make more and more sense in the end and it'll be worth the wait, I promise!

Now, without further ado, here is chapter 6: Training.

This chapter will contain strong sensuality and sexual references, so some discretion is advised.

Scene VI: Training

"Ahh!" A moan erupts from me the second a spot of wetness forms inside of my pants, and I clutch my blanket as my body goes through the motion. My eyes flutter open to see my room subtly glowing from the moonlight outside, and I writhe from the last convulsion that my body produces from the pleasurable dream I've just experienced. In a split second, I remember who it was that I was having sex with in that dream and I jolt up to cover my mouth, turning to my side to hurl into the bucket next to my bed. It looked and felt so realistic, I swear. I take a few moments to compose myself and steady my breaths, my sides quivering from the impact of my vomiting. Leaning back away from the foul smelling bucket, I rub my fists over my eyes to fix my blurry vision from the sleepiness, preparing myself to wash myself from the disgusting fluids that I so carelessly let myself get away with. I can hardly believe it. Kenshin. Of all people I could have a wet dream over, it's him that I imagine impaling himself into me. I burp and cover my mouth, afraid to throw up again, but then it slides back down into my stomach.

I grab the bucket handle to take it with me to the backyard to seek the well, and I use the well's tinier bucket to fetch fresh water from down below to wash my face and the front of my pants, rubbing its fabric against each other to try and scrub off my fluid from it. All the while, I am mumbling and gritting my teeth in rage over my disgusting dream. Kenshin Himura! Of all people! A pinch of migraine pops in my skull and I grab my head in agony, completely frustrated with myself. Outside, the temperature is lukewarm and the winds carried the sweet scent of flowers planted not too far from here, but despite the idyllic environment, I am still in turmoil. I will have to take this bucket into the bathhouse since that's where the toilet is and I can flush it there. This just brings back too many horrible memories for me; my family never cared about my sicknesses, and I had to fend for myself to clean up any and all messes lest I want to get beaten something fierce. Feeling satisfied from feeling clean, I look back at the dojo, imagining Kenshin sleeping soundly and blissfully ignorant of what's going on with me, and I grab my hair with both my fists in a fit of passionate anger.

"Goddammit, Soujiro, why can't you be less of a degenerate!" I whisper vehemently against myself, but it appears that my whisper was loud enough to scare off a nearby cat and made it yowl while running off into the distance. I wrap my arms around myself, blinking at the sound of the cat for a while, and then I sigh to get a hold of myself. I flushed the other bucket's content down the toilet in the bathhouse before I come back to the backyard to gaze upon the dojo, just thinking and wondering. I run what I dreamed of inside my head: Kenshin taking off his haori, Kenshin commenting on me not being touched in a while, Kenshin growling against my neck as he touches my most sensitive spots, Kenshin swallowing and licking me until I couldn't see straight, Kenshin mounting me..

Kenshin.

My cheeks flare and I look at one window of the dojo, my heart telling me that perhaps that is where he is sleeping in tonight. My hand comes up to trail over my neck and my cheek, still feeling his kisses from the dream there, as if they left behind a line of flames to behold. Maybe I do think he is attractive? I mean, Himura is very easy on the eyes, if I had to be honest. Aside from Kaoru, I can easily imagine him having other women and even some men finding him pleasurable to look and to be around. His rare combination of red hair and lavender eyes helps his case, too, and he just seems to easy to converse with no matter who you are. I don't doubt that he is objectively personable and a lovely person, so maybe, just maybe, I too find him interesting in that manner too? My hand curves so that my finger is dragging itself on my lower lip, remembering the kisses I've felt in the dream. A shiver runs up my spine. Maybe my dream is just an extreme form of admiration? Maybe it doesn't have to mean that I want to do anything strange with him. But then, if that were the case, how come I never had such dreams about Yumi, or even Shishio for that matter? I admired them and looked up to them in my younger years, and Yumi is as attractive as anyone would have guessed if they ever saw her in person, so why couldn't I have had such dreams about her instead? It doesn't make sense. Of all the wet dreams I've experienced, it's usually about some pretty face I've seen in the crowd or went on a date with, and the dreams weren't as surrealistic as this one with Kenshin.

So maybe.. maybe I do like Kenshin? Perhaps, just a little bit?

I look upward even more to see that the moon is out in the open sky, illuminating my entire surrounding. Tokyo is a very beautiful city, I've come to find, and my new friends here are absolutely wonderful. I wonder if perhaps, I could even stay a little longer than one week? I've already missed a couple of days of what should have been spent on discussing and training with Kenshin, but were instead wasted on frivolous activities such as the festival, even though I did have some fun—minus the prostitute incident of course—with all of the gang. It's so funny when you think about it; when I was in the Juppongatana, there was no way we would have fun like that. It was something deemed lower than ourselves, something that unintelligent peasants and farmers look forward to, but I really did enjoy myself that night, just to enjoy being alive like a normal human being. I wonder if living here with Kenshin for a while will also teach me how to be more human and not just another manslayer like he was many years ago. I wonder what Kenshin had to go through to soften so much and to open his heart to his friends and Kaoru. I wonder if I can ever be so happy like he is, knowing all the blood I've shed in my lifetime. I wonder if I could ever forgive myself like he has forgiven himself. So many answers to seek, and yet so little time. I go back inside the Kamiya dojo and bring my clean bucket back inside into my guest room, far away from my bed this time as I feel I will no longer be heaving anymore. I lay back down and close my eyes, hoping I don't have another dream like the last one, and yet, I can no longer betray the excitement of what today will bring to me.

Himura. I close my eyes and sleep peacefully for several more hours, awakened by a dark and dreamless rest by the sun hitting my face. I get up to stretch, heading out into the bathhouse for my morning rituals before reporting myself to the kitchen to see everyone sitting down for breakfast. Everyone beams up soundly at my arrival, and I couldn't help but break out into a shy smile. They're so cute.

"Hello there," I bow to everyone.

"Soujiro is awake!" Ayame chants, her sister repeating the same sentiment with much joy in her voice.

"Hey kid, hope you're feeling better," Sanosuke gives me the thumbs up, "Kenshin is excited to start his training with you today, if you're up for it."

I only lift my chin up to blink at the brown haired brute with a questionable expression, "He said that?"

"He already ate, so he'll be waiting for you in the training room," Megumi comes into the room with a plate of rice and eggs, "But you, my dear boy, must eat first. Otherwise, you won't be able to beat him during training, right?"

I see her winking at me and I giggle, straightening up, "That's fair. Alright, I'll eat."

We enjoy some light bantering and sharing local news of what's been happening in the area, and in the back of my head, I can't help but think of the Bokkai family and what had become of them. When will they show up again? Why does their leader know of Kenshin Himura the Battousai? Does it even matter at this point? I don't bring this up to the family; why make them worry over something that probably won't even happy? It doesn't matter, anyway. They could be arrested somewhere far away from here and are safely locked away from society. I was lucky in that nobody ever got the description for the Ishin Shishi leader Okubo Toshimichi killer, me being so quicker than the eye can describe the way, and even if people did saw me in public, they would have never guessed a baby faced teenager could do such a thing. Try as they may, the police will never find me. I am very confident over that.

Breakfast was soon over and I venture into the training room where Kaoru holds her school of the Kenjutsu, teaching her young students of its art of swordsmanship to use to protect rather than to kill. So it was her who motivated Kenshin to take up such an idealistic moral standard and whom ended his ten year wandering status in the first place. I wish I could affect someone so deeply like she has. I walk in on Kenshin standing in the middle of the room, facing me with a very serious look on his face, and I can feel my own face also taking on a grim tone to match. It's about the begin. I take a few cautious steps towards him, and just when I was about to be quite close, he holds up his hand to stop me. I do so and look into his eyes, my hands forming fists to prepare myself for battle.

"I will begin with our first lesson of the Hiten Mitsurugi that my sensei taught me many years ago," Kenshin's eyes frown deeper, "By assigning you to your first activity to engrave its philosophy of putting others first before yourself."

"I'm ready," My fists clench harder in determination, "What do I have to do?"

Kenshin is silent for a moment, studying me, and he suddenly points to an area behind me, "There, right by the door."

I look over my shoulder and I swear I nearly fainted. Near the door is a bucket and a towel hanging on the side of it. What is this nonsense? Where are our weapons? Where is the battle glory? I look straight back at Kenshin and I could feel my eye twitching, "What?"

He smiles brightly and perks up, "Your first lesson for today is to help my wife Kaoru with her house chores."

That did it. I collapse to the floor with a loud bang, and then I shoot back up to scream with fire coming out of my mouth, "You've got to be kidding me, Himura!"

He shakes his head and smiles even wider, "Not so, Soujiro, that I'm not! I feel this will help you with the philosophy I have in store for you."

I want to kill him. I want to strangle him. I want to take him down right here, right now. Even if I wasn't carrying my own sword here, I could still pin him to the ground and choke him to death. I could do it. But then, something in his smile makes me blink and relax, my anger diffusing into a state of perplexity. Where is he going with this? Why would cleaning the house help me in becoming a better person? He bows down and walks by, patting my shoulder to comfort me.

"You will do just fine, Soujiro, that you will. I'll be here today to help out. In fact, I can help you with the laundry since that's usually the toughest chore," He nods and I blush, looking down at myself. There's just no way that he is serious, is he?

I look at him again and I whisper, "Kenshin?"

He opens his eyes and tilts his head, "Yes?"

I hesitated, wondering if I should bring up the topic of admiring a teacher so much so that they develop strange dreams over it, but I knew this couldn't be a good idea. He wouldn't take it well, I think, since he is settled down with a wife and son, that even playfully entertaining such an idea would be absolutely off the table. I wish I could have such a conversation with somebody who won't judge me, but alas, life is not so simple. I look down again and shake my head, "Never mind. I'll be right behind you."

Kenshin looks right at me for a while, and tightening his grip on my shoulder—and me wanting him to do something more—he nods, "It's alright, Soujiro. Everything will make sense someday."

But will it?

I follow him out of that room and into the hallway, where we both grab our separate hand towels to begin. With it moistened with soapy water, Kenshin and I slap down our towels on the floor, our bodies hovering over the floor with our hands on the towels and our bodies positioned as if we were about to race. Wait, are we? I look over Kenshin and he smiles back good naturedly, and I sigh in relief, until I hear someone taking a step into our views. Looking up, I see Yahiko with a shit eating grin on his face, and I freeze on the inside. He lifts his one arm up, and I knew what I was suspicious of just a few seconds ago; we are having a race. With towels! Well, if Kenshin is up for the challenge, then so will I! I put on my serious face and lock my stance and Kenshin also does the same. In another dimension, this would be hilarious to onlookers and even to myself, but this somehow feels deadly and horrifying. I grit my teeth and Yahiko swings his arm down, and in an instant, Kenshin and I fly off, leaving a dust trail behind so large that Yahiko is chocking on it.

"Holy crap, look at them go!" I hear Yahiko from behind me bellowing.

"What was th—" Kaoru slides open the panel door that leads into the kitchen to see what the fuss is about, but is then caught up with smoke as Kenshin and I zoom past her, leaving her confused and breathless.

Meanwhile, I speed up as much as I could to catch up with Kenshin, applying my shukutchi at the last second to get ahead. Looking behind over my shoulder, I throw a tongue at him, but in that split second, I see his eyes going comically large and going "Uhnn?" and I look to where he was looking at—a wall hits me face first, knocking over a potted plant. I can't even describe the pain to you even if I tried. I slide down to the floor, my body seemingly transformed into liquid and I groaned in a cartoonish manner. Kenshin rushes over to where I'm at to see if I am okay and not too dangerously injured. I hear a couple of people walking over to see where the commotion was, and I hear someone laughing to the point of tears.

"Oh, man! That was amazing," Sanosuke wipes a tear from his eye, "You guys can be such idiots, honestly."

"I'll say!" Kaoru finally explodes, "Who's idea was this?!"

While I'm twitching and moaning in pain, Kenshin points at himself and laughs awkwardly. Well, he's not lying. While Kaoru cleans up the broken vase of the poor destroyed plant, Yahiko gets an earful by Megumi of playing accomplice to Kenshin's incredibly foolish idea of "speed cleaning" as Yahiko so eloquently calls it. Sanosuke helps Kenshin to nurse me back to health by applying some wrapped ice over my newly formed bump, and all the while Sanosuke is too busy laughing over what happened, Kenshin is holding me in his arms while applying the appropriate pressure to my wound. My eyes flutter back from my dizziness and I see Kenshin's face hovering over mine, and realizing that he's touching me like a bird with broken wings, I shove myself away from him and sit up, hiding my blushing face from him.

"I think I should help your wife with the plant," I mutter, my blush deepening.

"It's alright, I got all of it," Kaoru walks next to me, "But you can help out with the dishes while you dry and I wash, okay?"

I quickly nod and get up from my seating area, desperate to get away from Kenshin, not wanting him to hurt me (or touch me so gently) again. I follow Kaoru into the kitchen to find quite a large pile of plates and utensils to wash, but as long as I have her near me, we should get it all done in less than an half hour. We begin, my bruise swelling from my accident, but I ignore the pain and just work on running a dry towel over the cleaned dishes that Kaoru promptly hands me every minute. This is nice, just working alongside with someone as sweet as Kaoru. Perhaps this is why Kenshin loves her so much, because despite her passionate outbursts, she really does have a certain purity to her that refuses to be pierced by the shaft of evil. Okay, that was such a poorly worded way to say that. I slap my hand over my face and groan at my own stupidity, making Kaoru look over me confusingly.

"Are you alright, Soujiro?" Kaoru blinks.

I shake my head and giggle, "I just feel so stupid to be suckered into that dumb race with Kenshin. That's the male ego for you, I'm afraid!"

She starts to rigorously wash the next plate while her face flushes into a deep scarlet, "Yeah, well, it was my husband's fault for coming up with such a dumb idea in the first place. He usually doesn't act this way, so I wonder if he's sick from your vomiting or something!"

"Oro?" I hear Kenshin's very small voice from around the corner.

Kaoru blows up from where she stands, "Yes, we're talking about you, Kenshin! If I ever find out so much as another thought of you making another stupid test like that again, so help me God!" Kaoru threatens with her chopsticks resembling close to a knife pointing at her husband, and Kenshin shrinks back with a nervous chuckle. I watch the exchange helplessly.

"You both are right in your anger, that you do!" Kenshin lifts both his hands to announce his defeat, "I won't do it again, Soujiro. Our next assignment will be a better one, that I'm sure!"

I fume and turn around with a huff, contemplating ignoring him until I can at least finish with the dishes. I can hear Kaoru tutting with her waging finger, and that is when Kenji waltz in to look at us being tense with one another. Kenji walks up to Kenshin and his father gathers him from the floor to take him somewhere else, leaving us both in peace at last. Finishing up the remaining dishes, I am able to have a conversation with Kaoru about the life that they all share after Kyoto; Kaoru mentioned the proposal about a year after Kyoto and how happy she felt that day, and the beautiful outside wedding that Kenshin and the other guys set up in their backyard. She mentioned her pregnancy with Kenji and how smooth it went, but it did not prepare her for the challenges of motherhood—especially since Kenji has a mixture of both her passion and Kenshin's random bluntness. She talked about watching her son growing up to resemble more and more like his father each passing day, which worries her heart about what will become of Kenji in the future.

"It worries me that he will.." Kaoru hesitates, gently giving me the last plate for me to dry, "That he'll end up becoming another manslayer, and I.."

I shake my head with a smile, "Kaoru, Kenji won't be another manslayer. I have a good feeling about the future of Japan as we know it. I think everything will calm down, and men won't have to shed blood for the sake of laws or ideals. Kenji will be fine, I'm sure of it."

Kaoru turns to me with some sadness, "You really think so, Soujiro?"

I feel a little surprised every time she says my name, so sure of my intentions when I myself question why is it I'm even here sometimes. I look at her, this young woman not even entering her thirties, and I see a long hard road in her eyes. I want to tell her that certain things won't happen, that wars won't break out, that her son will come out in one piece. But, I just don't know for sure what will happen. Experience has taught me that humanity has some much hatred down to their core, that we will never stop killing each other. And then Kaoru Himura, the woman who birthed the son of the man who left behind gallons of blood, seems to wonder if perhaps karma is a sure thing that will catch up to them at one point or another, if Kenshin hasn't really repented for his own sins.

But, I don't want to break her heart. I instead clasp my hands over hers and beam at her, "It's going to be alright, Mrs Himura. Kenji is loved, and through that, he will succeed and live a long, happy life."

Kaoru tears up, her smile so sweet and subtle, and she gives me a prompt hug, me returning the favor. She smells faintly of orchids. Before I know it, she leans back and laughs at the area behind me, prompting me to turn around to see Kenji sitting on Kenshin's shoulder and pulling both his cheeks so that Kenshin can look like he's giving us a really huge grin. We all start to laugh at that, Kenshin even chuckling from under his breath, and then it was time to do the laundry. Megumi drops in to announce that there's been a medical emergency that needs her attention, and that Dr. Gensai and his granddaughters will come with them, along with Sanosuke, being her husband and all. Yahiko and Kaoru remembered that they need to go buy extra umbrellas from all the rain storms, since the ones they have are about to break soon and can't afford to go without them, and so Kaoru asks Kenshin and I to man the dojo while everyone else leaves.

"Bye everyone," Kenshin waves with his hand as everyone else waves at the both of us from the front door before they head out to their own destinations, and he turns to me with a kind smile, "Let's get started, then?"

My heart is thumping at the prospect of being completely alone with him, but.. I also feel somewhat thrilled over this as well. I turn back at him to nod in agreement, and we both go to the backyard towards the large metal tub of water to drop our soaps in. I rub the clothes against the washing board while Kenshin rinses them to hang them up to dry. I try to just focus on my task at hand so that I won't get distracted by Kenshin, despite my heart trying to pull my eyes to look at him from time to time. Whenever he would catch me looking at him, he would smile innocently at me, and I would either blush and quickly look away, or I nod in recognition. I so badly want to talk more about his life philosophy, but it just feels so strange to bring it up while I'm handling Kenji's underwear, so I decide to confront him later tonight for it. No use arguing when there's chores to be done right now.

After almost thirty minutes, we switched jobs, and it was now me hanging up the wet clothes on the clothing hanger line as Kenshin washes the clothes. A single drop of water enters my eye and I wince, wondering if it came from the clothes, but then I hear a ominous roar from above my head and I can see the skies getting darker by the second. I whip my head to look at Kenshin with wide eyes and he too looked up in surprise, and he gets up from his seating to hold out a hand. He takes his hand back and his eyebrows jump at the realization: It's going to rain.

"Quick, grab all the clothes! We have to dry these inside!" He urges me and starts to quickly gather everything from the washing tub, making sure they are properly rinsed and then going into their respective baskets all the while I'm pulling all the clothes from the hanging line as quickly as I can. Soon a series of rain drops fall on top of us, and we panicked, not wanting to muddy the clothing that we worked so hard to clean, and I grab one basket to rush it under the dojo's roof to keep it dry before hurrying back out for the next basket. After a couple of rounds, I feel something inside of me to look over my shoulder at Kenshin, and my breathing comes to a halt: I see Kenshin looking up at the sky, his back towards me, his clothing getting soaked and clinging to every inch and slopes, seeing his defined muscles more easier than usual. His red hair is turned into a very steep, dark auburn from the rain, and for a moment, I feel as if I'm looking at a beautiful painting. I carefully turn around completely to face him, him not moving an inch, looking at the storm above him, as if he had never been caught in the middle of a storm before. It's so pure. It's so..

"It looks like you're just as desperate as I am," I can see Kenshin in my mind, his eyes tightening at me while I am subjected to his will to pleasure me, "Am I right?"

I feel a shiver going up my spine and then feel it travel back down in between my legs, as sure as I've felt in that dream. God dammit. I can see Kenshin's clothing getting more and more floaded, really starting to see the outline of his silhouette, the same body I've dreamed and came to. I take one quiet step, as slow as I can allow myself to be. It is a strange fact that, because I know how to run and fly into neck breaking speed, that I can also move slower than a garden snail if I must. You can never take the teeth from a lion when its heart is that of a hunter. I take another step, my heartbeat drumming inside my ears, my pinkie twitching like it did four years ago when I told Yumi that fighting Kenshin made me irritated. I take another step, a shocking thought breaking inside my head as I did so. Ask him if you can get on your knees for him.

What? Why?

To suck him off, of course.

I should ignore the voice of reason—and at this rate, I am reluctant to even call that anymore—but seeing Kenshin so vulnerable like this invokes something biologically strong inside of me, something that I should capture as my own, like a hawk whose eye has caught sight of a field mice. I have to have him. I must have him. I take a few more steps towards him. I can maybe manipulate him to at least let me have a taste of him. I am normally angry at myself for having such thoughts like this, but damn it all if my body needs to experience his. Maybe I'll get over my sick obsession over him if I can allow myself that. Maybe I'll even get him to pleasure me with his mouth too after I make him cum. Maybe we can even do it, together, at the same time, me with him in my mouth and his mouth on me. A groan erupts from underneath my throat at that thought and I pull on the front of my haori, but then Kenshin turns around to look at me in blinking confusion, and I stop. We look at one another in silence, my bottom lip quivering and my eyes widening in fear that he has me all figured out. He's a smart man, why wouldn't he? But then, he takes a few steps forward me and does something completely unexpected.

He places a hand over my wet forehead while feeling his own with his other hand, and he hums. I stand completely still as he does this, my heart almost ready to implode, and he tilts his head at me, "Are you getting a fever, Soujiro? I heard you yowling like a sick cat back there."

My eye twitches, almost wanting to be pissed, and another part of me wants to laugh out loud, but I instead smirk, "I think I am." He looks up to frown at the sky, trying to concentrate for a moment, and then I clear my throat to get his attention on me again, "Will you.. will you hug me, Kenshin?"

Please, Kenshin.

"Hm? How will a hug help you, Soujiro?"

I smile bitterly at him, "Please, Kenshin. Just hug me."

He gapes at me, and then he closes his mouth and eyes to move in for an embrace, and I wrap my arms around his neck, letting the rain wash us over, not caring how cold it feels. With him and I like this, I have all the warmth to get me by. Oh my God. This feels amazing. It's completely devoid of what my body had previously desired, but somehow, this cures the itch I feel inside even better than all the sex I could remember having with other women back then. I feel whole, I feel loved, I feel safe and just.. I can't describe it. Not enough words in the world to do it justice. I melt into this hug and I could feel my heart singing happy songs. Kenshin smells so much like a forest clearing, woodsy and clean, and I sigh while privately inhaling his scent. I want this to last forever. I don't care about anything anymore. My soul feels completely at rest when I am with Kenshin like this. I wonder if its possible to regard someone so highly like this despite the similiar gender.

Kenshin has to be the one to break the hug as I probably wouldn't have ever let him go unless absolutely neccesary, and he smiles at me, "I hope that comforts you, Soujiro. Now we must head back inside the dojo to dry off."

"Agreed," I dreamily respond, trying to shake off my dazeful and lustful state from out of my head, and we both head back indoors to continue with the hanging of the laundry. The ones that still needed cleaning will have to wait for tomorrow, but at least more than half of it is done and I can take that as a personal success. Kenshin gets started with the cooking while I broom the floors to collect all the dust, and it did not take long until everyone else came back home from their responsibilities. Sanosuke loudly commented on how dreadful it was outside while Kaoru comes up to me to ask if we were okay. I told her I might catch a cold, but that it won't kill me, giving her a giggle to disarm her. She asks me if I could watch Kenji and the two girls while she sets up the table, and I agreed. I take Kenji by the hand while Ayame and Suzume dances behind me to go to Kenji's bedroom, and I close the sliding panel.

"Now, what is it that you guys would like to play?" I chuckle as the young girls suggest we go play hide and seek, "Oh? Is that a favorite game for Kenji, too?"

Kenji huffs heroically, "I hide, you seek!"

"Kenji doesn't like to seek out the others," Ayame chortles, "We have to do what he says."

"I understand," I rest my palms over my eyes, "Shall I start?"

"You mean you'll find all of us, Soujiro?" Suzumi cooes in wonder, "This never happened to us before!"

I smile with my eyes still covered, "Ten."

I hear the pitter patter of tiny feet running around and the sliding of the panel door, no doubt all of them leaving me alone in this room again to count down to zero. I stop at five, knowing that cheating isn't the answer, but I do want this game done and over with at the same time. I peer from the corner, to see nobody in the hallways, and I quietly walk around, sliding each doors open to see if my eyes can discern the sight of a single hair strand or a body part accidentally peaking out somewhere, to no avail. I look and look everywhere, from the living room to the kitchen and even Kenshin's bedroom, but I can't find them anywhere. Finally, I see from the corner of my eye that Kenji's ponytail is peaking under a bundle of pillows on the floor in Yahiko's room, so I sneak up carefully to spread the pillows open. Kenji growls and covers his face, disappointed in himself for being too easy to catch. One day, this man will be like his father, but for now, he is just a child. I smile dearly from where I stand at him.

"Come help me find the other girls," I whisper with my hand out stretch towards him.

Come help me find my head too, while you're at it.

Soon after we found the girls, it is time for dinner. While everyone else were busy talking and laughing over what happened today, I secretly watch Kenshin. I'm trying to piece together what the dream from last night, combined with what happened during our laundry mishap could possibly mean. Why did it feel so good to embrace him like that, I wonder? Perhaps I really do need to experiment with another man to see if I do enjoy them in that manner and not just as a platonic sense of respect. There are prostitutes abound in Tokyo, but they're mostly all women, I find. It may be difficult to pinpoint a male one to have sex with, so I'm left to my own devices, to perhaps please myself to the thought of men and to see if it somehow clicks for me. Still, I do feel very ashamed of myself for even having these emotions to begin with. I wonder if Kenshin ever saw another man the same way I'm looking at him. With longing and with passion. I look down in time Kenshin's eyes flicker over to me, worried that he caught me staring at him. Luckily, he mentions nothing and continues to chat with Sanosuke about the rain outside.

There's just no point wondering now. Not tonight. Tomorrow, the real training will begin. Soon we all took turns with taking a bath, which totaled to an hour, and we went to bed. The day felt so short, but I feel that my sleep will last long and plentiful. I shut my eyes, letting my conscious seeping into darkness, and in my mind's eye, I can see a very dark room in the middle of nowhere. Soon a bed fades on the floor, with a huge quilt blanket on top of it, and I see movement, so subtle that your eye won't catch it until you concentrate hard enough. I see two heads peeping from above the cover, one with brown hair, the other with red hair, and it is two men looking at one another. The brunet gazes at the eyes of the auburn haired man, and the red head lowers his eyes to the other's lips. Inching closer, the brown haired man starts kissing the other one, and soon I can no longer run away from who I am looking at. It's me. It's me and Kenshin. At our closest and at our happiest. Kenshin opens his mouth to let Soujiro's tongue in, seeing movement underneath the blankets that no doubt something sensual is happening.

I open my eyes, the sound of kissing and quiet moaning ending abruptly. This isn't good. This isn't good at all.

What am I going to do?