Disclaimer: I do not own these characters – they belong to Trudi Canavan
Friendly Advice.
Rothen waited outside the door for the servant to let him in. It was early evening and he had been invited to visit Sonea for refreshments. Khara opened the door and showed him into the guest room. Rothen glanced round, it was a large room and the furniture and fittings were very expensive and well made, but he didn't really like it very much. It is a room more suited to an old man, than a young woman, he thought. Even the curtains were partly drawn so that the light from the setting sun was restricted and subdued. The whole impression was one of dullness.
A door opened and closed somewhere in the apartment, and Sonea came into the room, a smile on her face as she saw Rothen. He looked at her carefully. I know she's the Black Magician, but did they have to give her robes which entirely enclose her in black stuff?
He was pleased to see that she did, indeed, look much better; less tired and drawn. It had been several weeks now since she had started to recover from the aftermath of the battle, but it was a slow process.
"It's so nice to see you, Rothen," Sonea came over and kissed him on the cheek. "I'm sorry it's been so long, but I found several really old books hidden away in the library and they take a lot of concentration to read and understand. I'm on the last one now, so I'm trying to catch up with all the other things I need to do."
They sat down and while Khara served the refreshments, they chatted about the latest gossip for a few minutes. Sonea seemed very well informed about what was going on in the Guild for someone who spent a lot of time cooped up in her rooms.
One of the main topics of conversation in the Night Room for the last few weeks had been the disappearance of Lorlen. The Administrator had not been seen since the day of the battle, when he was last sighted attacking the invaders from one of the buildings near the main gates. His body had not been amongst those recovered after the fighting. All the magicians, whose bodies had disintegrated on death had been accounted for, so it seemed probable that Lorlen was still alive, somewhere.
As the conversation ground to a halt while they ate some of Khara's pastries, Rothen studied Sonea. There was something different about her, but he couldn't quite work it out. She seemed more at ease with herself than previously and he was pleased to see her tuck into the pastries with a good appetite.
"You know Dorrien came to see me just before he left?"
"Yes, he told me what happened. I am sorry if he was a little rash, he's very fond of you, and hoped you would be in favour of his proposal."
Sonea sighed, "I'm afraid I was a bit rough on him, but he didn't seem to understand that I do not want to marry him. I hope he understands now. I shall never marry your son, Rothen. I hope, if he mentions it to you in the future, you will convince him not to ask me again. " She looked down at her hands for a moment and Rothen caught sight of a ring he hadn't noticed her wear before.
She looked up and saw the direction of his glance. She held out her hand so that he could see the gold ring on her marriage finger. There was an incal engraved on it, but he couldn't see clearly what it was.
"It is Akkarin's ring," Sonea said. "While we were hiding in the city, just before the battle, Akkarin and I agreed to marry after the fighting was over. I regard myself bound by that promise. That is why I will never marry anyone else, including Dorrien."
Rothen looked at her with concern, "I am sure that Akkarin was fond of you and you of him, you were thrown together in difficult circumstances so it's only natural, but that mustn't mean you spend the rest of your life mourning his death. You are very young, Sonea, barely twenty. You cannot live the rest of your life in this gloomy room brooding over Akkarin and what might have been."
Sonea laughed without humour, "Why is it that everyone presumes to tell me what I feel about Akkarin. They all do, you know! It's just like being treated as a small child who is patted on the head and told "….there, there, it's all right….." all the time. I am so tired of it." She twisted the ring on her finger, "I have decided to wear the ring on my finger, rather than on a chain round my neck, so that people will finally know what we meant to each other and what we intended to do. Perhaps that will shut them up!"
Sonea got up suddenly and began pacing round the room. As she walked, the black silken robes swished about her and Rothen was struck by the similarity of the sound to that made by Akkarin when he used to stride around the Guild. Even the robes she wears must remind her of him, he thought sadly. Sonea stopped by the sideboard and began playing with one of the ornaments. She turned it over and over in her hand, frowning down at it for some time. Then she seemed to come to a decision and returned to her chair.
"Rothen, I know I can trust you. We have been friends for years and I regard you as family. I am going to tell you something, but you must promise not to tell anyone else. I asked you here because I wanted your advice – I think you will give me proper advice, not just something you believe I want to hear."
Rothen leaned over and took her hand, "Yes, of course you can trust me. I've only ever wanted what was best for you."
"I've already told you part of it, that Akkarin and I were going to marry. We didn't intend to return to the Guild afterwards. We were going to remain exiles and go far away from Kyralia – not sure where – just somewhere far away. Well, that didn't happen. Now, I am stuck here in the Guild, unable to leave Imardin without permission from everyone from the King downwards. Everything I do is surrounded by rules and restrictions, I am nothing more than a prisoner." She stopped talking for a moment, then sighed heavily.
"Well, that's as may be. It's not really what I intended to say. Akkarin and I love each other very much, we have loved each other for a long time and I am going to have his child." Sonea stopped and looked straight at Rothen. "I can see you are shocked."
"Sonea, my dear, how difficult for you." Rothen was shocked, but had tried not to let it show. He'd had no idea things had gone so far. "When will the child be born?"
"Vinara said about five months or so. She's been sworn to secrecy too, but as she said, people will find out soon enough. I need your advice about what to do concerning Akkarin's family. The child should be acknowledged by them officially, but I am worried they might try to take it away from me."
"I don't know the family very well, but they do have a reputation for pride. Lady Alechia in particular can be very difficult; she has a great sense of what is due to her. It was rumoured that she and Akkarin had some terrible arguments about the women she tried to match him with."
Sonea frowned, "I have been trying to think of how I could prevent the family taking the child. If I go to see them, before news of the baby gets out, and explain about the promises Akkarin and I made to each other, they would understand it was only the struggle with the Ichanis at first, and then his death, which prevented the marriage taking place. I would like them to agree that we were as good as married from the moment we exchanged promises. That way, it would not be quite so easy for them to take our child once they find out about it. Do you think that would work?"
Rothen thought for a moment, " It depends on how much they want the child. If they are not interested, then I don't suppose they would care whether you have it or not, whether you keep it or not, or whether you think you were "married" or not. But,…but if they see the child as a potential heir, then nothing you say will persuade them you were as good as married to their son."
Sonea looked at him earnestly, "I must keep this child, Rothen. It is all I have of Akkarin here." Her eyes filled with tears, "I miss him so much. No one in the Guild has any idea of what he is like, underneath that cold and remote air he wears. He is the most caring, loving person I know."
Rothen was disturbed to hear Sonea talking about Akkarin as if he were still alive, He had noticed she had done so earlier, but had thought perhaps it was a slip of the tongue. He hoped it was a temporary thing and that she would soon learn to accept his death.
"I understand, Sonea, it must be very difficult without the father of your child to share things with you. But you are not without friends here and we will do everything we can to support you," he said gently. "My advice about House Velan is to see them before it is known you are expecting Akkarin's child, and try to persuade them to accept the idea of marriage. That is all you can do. What they decide to do afterwards, we will find out soon enough."
