Chapter 7: Undertaking

Rey almost wished she was back in the forests of Takodana running from Kylo Ren when the time to say goodbye came, for surely it was an easier thing to do.

Almost.

BB-8 was ramming into her already-struggling legs begging for attention while Poe was hugging her, causing her knees to shake by leaning his full weight into the embrace.

Leia watched the debacle with an impish grin on her face.

"Must you hang off me like an ornament, Poe?" Rey huffed past her constricted lungs.

"Hey, don't sell me short. I'm bloody fine jewellery, lady."

Rey giggled, patting his back as affectionately as she could with her arms pinned to her sides as they were. Mostly, she just ended up swatting at his ribs.

"C'mon Poe, I can barely breathe!" He loosened his arms slightly, and she finally managed to return his hug, resting her chin on his shoulder, "You look after yourself, Dameron. I want everyone still functional when I get back. No more life threatening injuries, okay?"

He held her out with his hands clutching her shoulders and smiled lopsidedly, "Can't promise anything, bud."

Chewie called an all-ready from the ramp of the Falcon, and R2-D2 beeped along with him.

Rey chuckled when BB-8 chirped back at them, no doubt telling them to back off. She would miss that little droid.

She turned back to Poe and smiled at him when he let his hands fall, a gloomy expression painting his face. Rey knew immediately what was bothering him.

"Hey, you take care of Finn too, you hear? You give him enough are for the both of us until I get back, or you'll have to deal with me."

He mock-saluted, the grin back in place, "Yes ma'am."

Rey had to steady herself when BB-8 launched himself at her legs again, catching her unawares this time.

"Alright, alright!" She knelt to his level, seeing Leia come a little closer in her peripherals, "You have no manners, and you know that right?" Rey asked teasingly as she lightly rubbed his head-dome. BB-8 twittered unapologetically, snuggling closer against her knees and touch.

Leia muttered something to Poe, and Rey saw his expression brighten.

BB-8's beeps turned ever so slightly miserable, and Rey laughed. "Yeah, I'm going to miss you to, you little imp. But don't worry, I'll be back as soon as I can."

He peeped in response and skidded back to Poe's feet when he called.

"Looks like I've got a sort little recon mission to keep my usual danger threshold nice and high-" At Rey's narrowed eyes he held his hands up in defence, "-Don't worry, don't worry. Doc sends her word that Finn won't be up till at least a day after I get back. This prime diamond's gotta fly, honey." Poe pulled her back for one last squeeze, and Rey smacked his chest good-naturedly when he let her go.

"Mmhmm, just so long as 'prime diamond' doesn't get himself pretzeled around a TIE fighter, I'm happy."

"Wouldn't dream of it, I'm your best necklace remember? And you'd probably kill me if I left Finny all alone." He winked at Rey before heading off, BB-8 hot on his heels.

Rey could only shake her head at him, marvelling at the mere existence of a friendship, never mind one this good. Rey had only ever dreamed of such things.

Leia's delicate laugh pulled her from her thoughts.

"Half the time I don't know how I dealt with him for the first few weeks. You should have seen him back then. Now, he's practically tame in comparison."

Rey snorted, "'Tame?' Ouch. I can't imagine having to deal with the equivalent of perpetually-drunk-Poe just as a normal thing."

Leia smirked, "What, you think he was always the model pilot? He had his cocky phase, and his hotshot phase. He learned humility as the missions became tougher, and more people were lost on missions. As with everyone here, he started at the bottom."

Rey chewed her bottom lip, frowning slightly at the pilot's retreating form. It saddened her that nothing ever seemed to be just…Happy. Was there nothing in the galaxy that just was?

"Here-" Leia handed her something, and Rey took it without looking. She shuddered when her fingers closed around the familiar tube of that lightsaber. "If you're going to train as a Jedi, you will need a weapon. And Rey, I want to thank you for what you're about to do."

Rey turned her eyes back to the General, focusing on the stoic, but friendly, and all too matriarchal face for the battered- but not yet beaten- spirit Rey knew lay beneath.

"I know you have your own reason for needing to find Luke, but I want you to know that I appreciate your decision to help. You could have left at any time, but you decided otherwise, and you'll always have a place in the Resistance, whenever you should return with Luke, just-"

"Don't worry, Leia. I'll bring him back."

Leia nodded. She was calmer than in her living quarters, but Rey still sensed alternative intentions lurking beneath the General's veneer. Though Rey was not yet too accepting of the idea of the Force, and what the Force could do, she couldn't deny that this feeling had its uses.

Rey sighed. She wasn't going to let this hang between them any longer.

"Leia, over the past few days-" How did one phrase this? How did you out a General in a polite fashion? "-When you've been telling me about, well, everything. Ben." She said the name through gritted teeth. "You are hoping that, by training with Luke, I can somehow lure him in?" Rey finished slowly and looked Leia right in her eyes.

Leia took a steadying breath, "To put it in so few words, but, yes. Something like that. Does this anger you?"

Rey faltered, "Not…No. It doesn't."

"But it makes you feel used."

"Slightly, yes. I'm more confused than anything else." And scared, but Rey wasn't about to admit that.

Leia tilted her head thoughtfully, speaking almost more to herself than Rey, "He's taken an interest in you. And you two will meet again-" This Rey couldn't deny. If that man had his way, and it seemed like he was used to that, it would definitely happen. "-My want for you is to be prepared. That is why I want you to train with Luke. To be able to defend yourself against a man who is, at this very moment, being pushed far beyond his limits in order to fulfil Snoke's wishes, which may very well include your death. My request of you, however, is that you don't kill him when you next meet. Bring him in. I don't much care if it's willingly on his part or not, he could be strung up in the cargo hold for all I care, but bring him in. I know it may not be a possibility, but that's my request."

It wasn't an entirely unfeasible one. He was her son, after all. He was all she had left. She was sure Luke would ask the same thing of her, with his Jedi mercy and all. This did not mean Rey had to bring him back all in one piece, just alive.

Rey caught herself just before she felt out the bond again. She would be glad if Luke's training helped break her of that habit.

"I'll consider it."

Leia considered her for a moment, "You're scared."

"Perhaps." Yes.

Her face emptied of everything else and was replaced with a countenance of motherly concern once more, "If it's the Force you're scared of, you needn't worry-"

"It's not the Force as such, but what the Force can do to a person." Like your son. "I want to learn, I just don't want to-"

Leia was shaking her head sternly, obviously understanding exactly what Rey was suggesting. "No. You won't share the fate of my son."

How could she be so sure? How could she still be so positive?

The woman took two assured steps towards Rey, and pulled her into her arms, holding her tight in a reassuring embrace that Rey suspected she had come to master over the years.

Rey positively melted into it, comforted by the maternal way Leia had come to treat her in times where her distress became obvious.

When Leia released her, that ever beseeching look was in her eyes once more, "Rey. May the Force be with you."

Rey nodded firmly, and started walking up the Falcon's loading ramp.

"Rey!" Leia called out, and when she turned, Rey saw a distinct look of déjà vu on the woman's face. "Just remember, he's not a bona-fide Sith. There's still Light in him, I'm sure of it." Leia was borderline pleading.

Rey was angry now, "Not a Sith? With all due respect, General, how can you still think him to be not a true Sith?" As for Light still existing within Be- Kylo Ren- Rey was uncertain.

The loading ramp started to close, and Leia shook her head, "Because, as I've said, you're still alive. He should have killed you." The last of what Leia said was almost drowned out by the ramp, but Rey caught some of it, and it left her in a rooted, staring at the metal of the hatch. "Seems…never been able to…"

Never been able to…What?

[Little One, I need assistance with take-off.]

"On my way, Chewie!" Rey called back on reflex, still in two minds over what Leia had just said.

When she sat by the controls, Rey pushed the thought right to the back of her mind, along with the neglected bond.

"All ready, Chewie?" He grunted affirmation. "And you R2?" He beeped excitedly in response.

The take-off was smooth, and Rey let them idle in the atmosphere of D'Qar while she keyed into the navigational map with R2's help.

"Ahch-To, huh?" Rey remarked, "Sounds about as ancient as these maps Luke used."

[As far as we could gather from them, the maps indicate Ahch-To to home the first Jedi Temple in record.]

Rey almost rolled her eyes. "After what I've heard around base, it seems to be a very typical thing of Jedi to do. Go cower away on some mystical planet."

Chewie growled a series of laughs, [I would agree with you there, Little One. I have experienced such incidents more than once in my lifetime.]

Rey looked out of the viewport of the Millennium Falcon onto the marble-like visage of D'Qar below and sighed. No one had any idea what Ahch-To would be like, and Rey was almost physically pained to leave the leafy beauty of the planet behind.

"Well, hit it Chewie. Let's go."

[Three days to Ahch-To, starting now.]

Rey groaned aloud as the blue of hyperspace enveloped the cockpit.

Three days in space? She was going to go mad.

The Wookie had the audacity to chortle at her.

[Go 'calm' yourself, Little One. Meditate. Might as well practice, since you caught onto Shyriiwook so naturally.]

Rey glared at him in indignant shock, "You're teasing me now? You big ball of incorrigible fluff!"

[Or, you could play holochess against the little trashcan-] R2 beeped irately [-But beware, it cheats.]

He patted her on the head, effectively shushing her continued nonsensical mumbling.

"Fine, I'll go meditate," Rey grumbled.

Chewie nodded dismissively, [Remember, meditation involves peace of the mind!] He called after her.

"Yes, mother!" She yelled back, electing instead to simply fall onto her bunk, the Wookie's howl of mirth echoing to her compartment.

Then there was quiet.

Far, far too much quiet.

No Resistance troops fooling around, no droids snapping at each other, and no Poe to chime in at the most perfect of times.

Now Rey understood what Leia had meant by 'noise'.

Now it was just her, the wholly too unobtrusive hum of the ship, and the Force.

And whatever the Force had done to her. No, what he had done to her. She was a prisoner in her own mind, and it made her furious.

Oh frack it all, why not? Rey leapt of her bed and sunk to the ground, imitating that 'Cobbler's Pose' she had seen travellers mimic when telling any Jedi stories.

Peace of the mind, Chewie had said.

So, what, just empty one's mind? Rey could do that.

After much error, Rey admitted that she truly could not do that.

Perhaps if she just focused on one thing. One very inane thing, like the engine's faint baritone purr.

That Rey could do.

But it was so incredibly boring.

Rey fell onto her backside with a huff, stretching her legs out in front of her, and looked at the holoclock.

Seven fracking minutes. Seven.

She banged her head back against the fuselage, and groaned when she used a bit more force than she intended, causing a loud thud to echo down the silent passageways.

[That sounds the epitome of peace, Little One.] Chewie's voice followed her crash after several beats of quiet.

"Shush it, Fluffy, I'm trying!"

Rey had absolutely written meditation off as useless and futile. So, she lay on the floor with her head against the wall, and aimlessly shuffled her Pazaak deck, swaying her head back and forth to a strange tune she had undoubtedly heard once upon a time, but couldn't quite place.

This counted as meditation, right?

It struck her as odd that the bond in her head remained silent, and that was the end of the momentary peace, as Rey once again reprimanded herself for allowing any attention to the tether.

But it stayed mercifully quiet.

Was he really leaving her alone?

Rey knew she hadn't imagined his presence the other night in the data centre. Or perhaps the nightmares were succeeding in driving her mad. Who knew? Certainly not Rey.

But…If that had been Be- Him. He had just calmed her, and left. That was it. No usual pomp or ceremony. No dramatics. He had simply pulled her from the brink of panic, and disappeared again, almost as if he didn't want her to know he had been present at all.

Rey shook her head. That was absurd. Kylo Ren valued his intimidation and menace. Kylo Ren would never have allowed himself to go unnoticed.

Except…

No. He probably saw that Rey was on the verge of discovering Luke's whereabouts- as well as her intention to find him- and planned on tracking her down to find them both. This sounded more plausible for Kylo Ren.

Something within her disagreed.

Either way, Rey knew Leia was right, and she was going to have to be very careful in the future. She would just have to be stronger to match him. Rey had tasted his training now, she knew what Leia claimed even before Leia had voiced it. Kylo Ren was a tuned machine bent to Snoke's every whim, and wilfully performing the tasks. Well, apparently not all the tasks, but Rey suspected this 'teacher' offer to simply be another ploy.

After all, that's what the Sith of legend did, right?

No matter, Rey would become more. She would not be scared of Kylo Ren.

The ship gave a harsh lurch, and Chewie called out an apology from the cockpit. Something about a rogue asteroid disrupting the hyperspace stream.

Rey's heart was beating in her throat from the fright, and while she was adamant she wasn't scared of Kylo Ren, that didn't necessarily mean she wasn't the slightest bit afraid on the whole.

All those simulations she had scavenged really worked as far as teaching you how to fly went, but they didn't really prepare you for everything that went with it.

Rey considered sleeping, and taking a medicinal pill for a dreamless one, but…Perhaps she would take Chewie's other advice. But that droid better play fair.

Rey picked herself up, and headed to the main hold.

"Hey, R2?"

His beeps were almost taunting in nature, as if he had been expecting her.

This was going to be a long three days.