A/N: Hola everyone. Sorry it took so long to update, but things came up (like Christmas…it happens), then school started urrggg.

True story: I keep a pile of books, notebooks, pens etc beside my bed, because I do all of my writing in my very tiny room. The first draft of this story was on a bunch of loose-leaf on top of that pile. I've been quasi-sick for the past few days, but I must have been totally delirious last night, because I woke up and the first draft was in my bed right next to my face. It was like the fanfiction gods were telling me to update. Weird, yeah?

So, here is chapter seven. The last one!!! I still can't get over the fact that I've actually finished something. Extra thanks to my reviewers. You guys rock my small literary world.

Warning: is this even necessary? Yep still slash.

Disclaimer: contrary to popular believe, I don't own harry potter. Shocker, I know…

Le chapter:

VIIxoxoxoxVII

Year Seven

I board the train

And know I have to tell you

The idea haunted me sixth year

And all summer

It rubbed my insides raw

And made me want to throw up

This has to end

You have to know

I find you with Peter

James is Head Boy

--Amazing I know—

So he doesn't join us

The train ride is torture

Filled with forced laughter

And silences so saturated with emotion

That I want to disappear.

xoxoxox

This is our last year

That terrifies me

No more Hogwarts

Time is running short

I have to tell you

But excuses paralyze me

And days turn into weeks

xoxoxox

Lily and James grow closer

She even smiles at me sometimes

I think James tells her things about me

And my horrible life

But I don't mind

It's good to have her encouragement

However silent.

xoxoxox

N.E.W.Ts make you stressed

Sometimes you snap at us

And you're always exhausted

The anguish comes out during the full moon

Some nights we don't dare leave the shack

You tear yourself apart

And all we can do is watch.

Even when you're human

You're edgy all the time

You've always been endearingly sarcastic

Now you're practically caustic

Your unnatural bitterness

Hurts you more than us

I see it in your eyes

And it kills me.

xoxoxox

One night I wake up

Your bed is empty

I find you in the Common Room

Your books piled around you

And you're crying

I sit beside

And ask you what's wrong

You look at me with dark puffy eyes

And tell me

No matter how well I do

I'll only have a half-life

With a second rate job

And I'll be alone

Because of the wolf

And I'll watch everyone

Be happy and move up in life

And I'll be left behind

Until I fade away.

So why should I even bother

With these stupid books

And stupid grades

That won't mean anything

Because no one will care?

My heart breaks

I hold you

And kiss your hair

You don't move away

You cry against me until there's nothing left

Then I tell you

You have to do well

So you can fight

Because things won't be like this forever

And you have to be ready

For when the world changes

Until then, you have to work harder

To get what we take for granted

And no matter what

I tell you

I'll never leave you

And I'll always care.

You break away a little

Your eyes are a question

You wonder how much I mean that.

Before I can even think

I kiss you.

Then I realize what I'm doing

I break away violently

I can't stop apologizing

There are tears in my eyes now

I want to run away

But I'm babbling

I'm on my feet and trying to flee

Your voice rises over my ranting

Sirius, stop being an idiot!

You take my hand

Touch my cheek

And you kiss me

And you keep kissing me

I can't breath

I want to cry

And the moment is perfect.

xoxoxox

I have never been happier

And the whole world knows it.

James just rolled his eyes and grinned

When he saw us holding hands

Peter looked surprised

Then shrugged.

I can't stop touching you

And you can't stop touching me

The Slytherines hate us more than ever

But I love kissing you in front of Regulus.

xoxoxox

By Halloween James and Lily are dating

James got one chance

One Hogsmeade visit

That's really all he needed anyway

And Lily relented.

They're beautiful together

xoxoxox

Life is still hard

It still hurts us

But we aren't alone

And that makes all the difference.

xoxoxox

You taught me how to speak basic Meremish,

That time can belong to two people for a little while,

What it's like to dance

With someone's hands in my back pockets

And head on my shoulder,

That honesty can make you weightless.

xoxoxox

Do you remember when

We first kissed in the corridor

The world stopped and starred

But they accepted it rather quickly

Or when we had that snowball fight

And James ran into a tree

We couldn't stop laughing

Lily was so concerned about that gash

On his cheek

But when it scarred over

She said it made him look roguish and sexy

And when I went to your house for Christmas

Your mother looked at you and me

She smiled so knowingly I blushed

I love your mum.

And those nights

Staying up late watching the fire die

Sometimes all four of us

Sometimes just you and me

But you were always beside me

Remember lying under our favorite tree

Heartbeat to heartbeat

Those memories are forever.

xoxoxox

The train stopped for the last time

We stepped off into the world

I would go home with James again

So I kissed you long and slow

Savoring your taste and scent

And the feel of your hair between my fingers

I saw my parents looking

Horror stricken.

I hope they saw how much I love you

I kissed you again

Then left with my new family

I would miss you

And it hurt

But I'd never been so happy

Nor felt so loved.

VIIxoxoxoxVII

A/N: So that's it. I hope you all enjoyed this. I have lot stuff going on, so I don't know when I'll be writing anything else, but I'll definitely try my hardest. I know I've neglected my other stories. Anyway, thanks for keeping with me throughout this story. Until we meet again, ciao.