Family Bonds
Disclaimer: I own nothing
A/N
Chapter 7 (The Buried Past)
Trina sat with Beck and Jade on the blue couch, her legs were crossed and her left arm hung over the top of the couch. "He has to come home eventually, right?" She looked to Beck and Jade on her right and raised her eyebrows. "Because I'm not leaving."
"Well." Beck placed an arm around Jade's shoulders and looked over his left shoulder and out the window. "Where would a single, divorced nearly eighty year old retired detective in a bad mood be found?"
"Know any local bars?" Jade replied with a casual laugh. Trina's head jerked back and she snapped her fingers at the realization. Jade's brow furrowed and a slick grin stretched across Trina's face. "What is it?"
David drank often enough when she was younger, and whenever he was stressed or upset, he'd go to the bar. If things hadn't changed much for him, she would be almost certain that he'd be there.
"That's exactly where my dad would be. I don't know any local taverns in this town." One thought she had was just to stay and wait, but if her father was trying to avoid her, seeing her car at the curb would be enough to make him turn the other way.
On the end table beside her she saw a number of pill bottles inside a brown wicker basket. A curious hum escaped her lips and she pulled the basket into her lap. "What do we have here?" She lifted a thick bottle and scanned the label. "Cholesterol."
Beck turned his head over and Jade nodded. "Typical medication for the elderly," Jade said abruptly, "My father takes a lot of them." The pills were labeled for David, and there were more than simple pills to monitor cholesterol.
He had pills for high blood pressure, medicine to help ease the pain of arthritis, and many others. "I see nothing for Grandpa in here." She was surprised to think her grandfather would be in better shape, but yet, she'd seen a great deal of things in her life to know it was possible. "With the medicine we have nowadays, people can live a lot longer, but still, this is a lot of stuff." She pushed a bottle away with her fingernails and stared down at a container towards the bottom. "There's something to strengthen organs…"
Jade reached into the basket and picked up a bottle. "I didn't know your dad had high blood pressure. Among other things." Neither did Trina, but she could see how it was possible all these years later.
"He worked in a high stress job for most of his life, his wife left him for another man, and it sounds like Tori's left him too." She took the bottle from Jade's hands and placed it back into the basket. "Being stressed out is almost a given."
Beck scratched the back of his neck and raised his eyebrows. "I'm almost surprised he's not taking an antidepressant." She laughed once and slid the basket back to the end table.
"All of this is medication someone has to take in order to sustain themselves, antidepressants aren't required and tend to do more damage than good." She tried antidepressants when she was a teenager, but only for a few short months before she quit them. "They make you sick, give you side effects that you need more medicine for, and at times make you suicidal. If you weren't already."
"You sound like you're speaking from experience."
"I do." She crossed her arms and watched the surprise flash before their eyes. "When I was seventeen, I was on Zoloft for about a month. It made me damn near crazy. Or crazier, if you want to go that route."
She rolled her neck to the right, sighing at the popping sound in her neck. "I never actually believed in antidepressants, and neither did Dad. My doctor recommended it strongly at the time, and mom was the one to give permission. By the time Dad found out I was taking them, he literally threw them into the fireplace and said I wouldn't be taking Zoloft again."
Trina's shoulders rose and she chuckled at the memory came to her mind. "He said, 'We are Vega's, we get through our shit on our own and do not rely on mind altering crap'."
It worked out too. Much of the depression and anxiety she suffered as a teenager was a thing of the past. "I've grown a lot since then. I've escaped my problems, made a life for myself and I have a remarkable family. I couldn't be happier, and you know something? I didn't need to rely on antidepressants to get here."
"Some people have to take them though."
"No one 'has' to, but I know there are some who feel they can't survive without them." She twisted towards the couple and moved her right arm up to the top of the couch. Her fingers closed and her index finger tapped the cloth.
"When I worked as an Intern at a law office, one of the attorneys had a client that was so riddled with physical ailments; Fibromyalgia, organ failure, coughing fits, all brought on by the antidepressant she'd been taking for about ten years for her depression."
"Yikes."
"And she still suffered from depression. Manic." These days she didn't believe in pills in general, save those that were truly needed. She'd become like her father in that regard, but having to take pills once you get older simply was inevitable. "I wouldn't be shocked if these pills are the among the first my dad's had to be on steadily."
"Why do you suppose antidepressants don't actually cure depression? Depression is a legitimate medical condition."
"It is." Trina uncrossed her legs and shrugged. "Antidepressants aren't designed to cure depression. They're designed to attempt to make you feel better, they can't treat the root cause of depression."
"What's that?"
"Many things can cause it. That's the problem, there are so many causations for it that pills just can't 'cure' it. They can only make you feel better, if anything at all, like morphine for a person getting out of surgery. At the same time, I'm biased."
"You never acted like you were depressed back then." Jade crossed her legs and slanted her eyes. "Hell, I always thought I was the depressed one." Trina swept her hair over her ear and shrugged once more.
"Everybody's got problems, Jade. It's a fact of life. I've struggled with crap for a long time. Even now I still struggle with certain things from time to time, but I don't let anything drag me down. I've got too much to work for."
Jade's lips curved up and she nodded. "Your husband, your kids, your career. Just don't forget to take time for yourself from time to time."
"Yeah." Beck's eyebrows closed together and his forehead wrinkled. "When you say you still struggle with some things now and then…can I ask?" An ancient memory flashed in her mind, causing her muscles to tense, but it was subtle and neither Jade or Beck noticed.
She remained stoic and placed her right hand over her left, squeezing it in her lap as she raised up the corners of her lips. "Beck I've said many times already, you have nothing to be guilty of." Beck frowned and his eyes darted to the side.
"I don't know. All these years and Jason never wanted anything to do with me. Most of it was to do with his father's affair, sure, but part of it I know he said was because of my part in how we treated you back then."
"That is his thing, though." She pulled her hand to her chest and raised her eyebrows. "I don't hold anything against you, Jade, Cat, Robbie…" She breathed in slowly and watched their lips purse. "Or Andre."
"Why the pause?"
"Don't worry about it." Beck slouched and Jade turned to her husband. She set her hand in his and smiled at him. "The only one that held any power over me back then was my ex, and maybe my immediate family, but that was just a disastrous combination."
"I don't remember you dating anyone," Jade replied. Her frown lines deepened and her left eyebrow rose beneath her bangs. "Hell, Tori never even mentioned you dating anyone. I mean, sure there was Jason, but we didn't even know about him." Trina pulled her hair away from her chest and threw it behind her with a sigh.
"I met Jason in 2009 at the camp. I was sixteen. That would have been around the same time that you guys met Tori, if not a little before. If that answers why I never dated anyone."
"Yeah, but after the camp, you seemed like you were trying to."
"Jason and I lost contact. After the camp, I was trying to move on, but I couldn't. Why do you think anyone I tried to date before we reconnected never actually lasted? Most of them, I just said they dumped me to save a little face." Jade jerked her head back and Beck's lips spread open.
"I had two difficult exes. One was before I met Jason at the camp, and the reason I didn't want to get into a relationship just yet. The second is the one no one knows about, which was after camp and before Jason and I reconnected." She stood up and stretched her back, sighing heavily. "That's the one that sticks with me from time to time."
"The one you said hurt you in some severe way? The one that you said someone else hit you because of?"
"Yeah…" She raised an eyebrow and closed her eyes. "The person didn't hit me because of what happened, he hit me because I wouldn't stop telling him to quit making fun of me and saying how I deserved what happened." She took a deep breath. Her eyes opened partially and her lips fell apart as the memory played on repeat.
"As for what happened? It was because I dumped him." Her chest grew tight and her eyebrows sank in the center of her forehead as the outside corners of her brows rose high. "I was in the process of accepting that I still had feelings for Jason and wanted to find him. I still wanted to be with him, so I dumped the guy. He got angry, did what he did, and bragged about it to his friend."
Jade and Beck fell quiet and gave her looks of contemplation. She smiled back at them and her features relaxed around her eyes and lips. "You're not going to tell us what happened?"
"Respect that, alright? It's been well over twenty years. I'd like not to dredge up a buried past."
"Alright." Jade reached over and gave her a friendly hug. "I think we can respect that. As long as you've moved on, as you say."
"Thank you." A shuffling sound caught her attention and she looked towards the archway, gasping out when she saw David standing within view. His eyes were glazed over and staring at her, his eyebrows were trembling above his gaze and his thin lips were stretched into a tight line.
How long had he been standing there without the three of them realizing he even arrived back home? Trina stood up and met his eyes. "I see you're home." Beck and Jade stood with her, but remained at her back.
"I figured you'd be too proud to leave, since you came to see me. I guess." David crossed his arms and averted his gaze. "What is it you want?"
"I have three children who don't know their grandparents or their aunt. They deserve to know you."
David dropped his arms and a scoff flew out with a heavy breath. "You're the one that walked out on us. If anyone's at fault here…"
"Don't deny my children because of me. You can deny me as you always have, but I'm not going to let my children be denied because of me." She walked towards him, slanting her eyes and closing her hands. "If you don't want anything to do with them, that's fine, but don't think it's over. I'd like you to give them a chance, a real chance without breaking their hearts."
"You disowned us, not the other way around. Now you want us back?" David rolled his eyes and turned sideways to look to the kitchen. "That's your daughter out there with your grandfather and husband? She looks a great deal like you did." Pride grew in her as she followed his gaze.
"Yeah. She's intelligent as well, an honor roll student. She just met her grandparents on her father's side, I want her to know my side as well."
"Why?" David shot her a skeptical look. "Why would you want your children to go through what you did with us?" He sneered and spoke with spite dripping from his tongue.
"Because I believe anyone can change. Just because you treated me like crap doesn't mean you would them. I will say, if any of you hurt them, then it will be the last you see any of my children or myself."
David's face tensed and his heavy eyes fell beyond her. The wrinkles around his eyes shifted up and he pointed at Beck and Jade. "You two. Out." The couple hesitated and looked at Trina as though waiting for her word. She gave them a nod and motioned to the front door.
"It's alright guys." The couple left in silence and Trina waited until they shut the door entirely. She took a deep breath and closed her eyes.
"I can't believe I'm seeing them with you. You left us, your family, behind…I think even Tori left them behind."
"They're good people. Different, now. They've grown up; we all have."
"After what Andre did to you? After what that Shapiro kid did, putting you in the hospital? After their puppet scheme…"
Trina cracked her neck to the side and rolled her shoulders back. "Yes." David's brow furrowed and his hands started to close up. "Beck and Jade have done nothing to me, I don't harbor any grudges against them. Not to mention, Beck happens to be my husband's half-brother." David cackled once and shook his head.
"Small world. How'd that happen?"
"That goes way back, they just reconnected for the first time. It made me want to find my family, to see if all of you wanted to see my children."
"Is that all? You only want us to accept your children?"
"If you accepted me, that's one thing. My husband? That's another. Jason and my children are the most important people in my life, I will give them the chance to know my side of their family…I won't let what happened between us keep them from knowing you."
"Remember the day you left us?" David walked towards the couch and paused to look at the basket of pills. He let out a grunt and took a seat on the cushion Trina had been on.
She turned around and placed her hands on her hips. "Yes."
"You told us you didn't feel safe anymore with us, that you didn't feel secure. We were toxic, bad for your health. We 'never cared' about you."
"You were in the same room when Andre was mocking me about my ex. You did nothing, not even when he punched me or shoved me to the ground." David's eyes fell and he shrugged.
"I didn't know how to react. I'd never seen that boy like that in my life, and it was the first I'd heard about your ex."
"It wasn't the first, you just weren't listening when I tried telling you what happened the first time." Her eyes shut and her right hand rose to her forehead. She rubbed her index finger and thumb in circles above her eyes and groaned softly.
"I was the one that had to investigate what Robbie did to me, since you did absolutely nothing." David sighed and his voice lowered to a near whisper.
"I didn't do nothing. You were okay, I thought you didn't care because you said it was one of Tori's friends. You even said it wasn't a big deal."
"When a girl who has just been injured tells someone 'it isn't a big deal', it's a big deal." She sat on the cushion farthest from him, bent her elbow on the armrest and perched her right temple on her hand with a sigh. "But you're right, I shouldn't have assumed you would automatically try to investigate who endangered your daughter's life."
"That isn't fair."
"It isn't?" She raised her head and smirked. "You're telling a prosecuting attorney that an allegation made against you isn't fair. How well would that hold up in court?"
"We're not in court."
"Would you like to be? I can arrange it."
David growled and his voice shook as he spoke up. "Why in the hell did you come back?" His eyes narrowed and his right hand flung out, pointing at her. "You said that puppet scheme was an eye opener, you said you couldn't trust us."
"At the time, I was fairly certain that my life could be in danger and none of you would act." She bit on her tongue, trying to keep her voice down. Her hand flung out and her eyes narrowed.
"You found out a man forced himself on your daughter because she dumped him, found out because you were a witness to that man's friend mocking and striking her down. You bought a lie told by three men alone with your daughter when she told you they were harassing her."
Fire burned in her eyes and her breathing grew heavy. "Would you like me to lay all the charges out for you?"
She stood up quickly and paced to the right, slapping the back of her hand into the palm of her left. "Failure to act, negligence and reckless endangerment of a minor. Accessory to assault and battery." She stopped pacing and turned to him with a widening scowl. "Don't sit here and tell me you're innocent and I had no reason to walk out, because if this were court and you didn't have a damn good lawyer, any decent prosecutor would be able to convince a jury to put you away."
David pressed his lips tight and threw his hands up. Trina's glare sharpened and her nostrils flared. "You practically pushed me out the door, if you remember."
"I don't remember that."
"No? The day I left, you were the one that told me that if I walked out the door, I was no longer welcome back."
"I…" He turned his head and for a split second, a look of confusion came over him. "I do not remember that. My memory isn't what it used to be." Trina's breath caught in her throat and she watched his head bow. Her heart started to sink, and a heavy breath fell from her lips.
"Right. Well. I didn't come here to fight with you. This isn't a courtroom, and you aren't on trial…It's easy for me to get into that mode."
"It's a good wall to have for defense of self."
"Hah." Her hands fell from her hips and the right corner of her mouth twisted into a smirk. "I imagine it is. Neither of us are innocent, but my children are. They deserve to know their grandparents and their aunt."
"Yeah well, I don't know about Holly and Tori. They left me a long time ago. Evidently they agreed with you, so I'm not sure I deserve to have anything to do with your children."
"Here." Trina walked over to her purse, seated neatly on the other couch. She reached in and removed her wallet from the bottom.
"What is it?"
"I have a picture." She opened the wallet up and handed it to him, pointing to the photo in the center. It was a picture of her three children sitting on the couch, and their father behind them with his arms around them. Rachel was in the center, rolling her eyes and smirking as Megan and Shawn hugged her as tightly as possible.
"Every day before court and after court, I look at that picture." David handled the wallet like it was a fragile object. Moisture glistened in his eyes as he raised his right hand and slid his trembling thumb across the photo. "They keep me sane and strong. I'm not a perfect mother, not a perfect wife or a perfect attorney, I can only do the best that I can. I try my best, all for them."
"And they'll never leave you. Unless you give them a reason to, but I hope you don't." He breathed in slowly and shut his eyes. "You have a beautiful family, Trina. I've never said it, but I'm proud of the person you've become."
She breathed in the compliment, smiling as her heart started to rise. "Could you care for them, Dad?"
"I have no grandchildren that I know of. I never knew that I had any, never thought I'd get a chance to see them if I did. I would love the chance to know them…" David lowered the wallet, still looking at it. His tears glistened on his cheeks. "I…I don't know how Holly or Tori would react to you trying to take us back into your life, but I do know I don't want to die and have no one at my funeral."
Trina sat beside him and put an arm around his shoulders. When she looked up to the archway, she saw Rachel's fingers wrapped around the left side frame. Her lips fell into a frown and her eyebrows rose as she watched her daughter's brown hair swing from view.
"Rachel. Come on in." David turned his head up, gasping softly as Rachel carefully stepped into view. Trina raised her arm and swung her hand inwards. "Come say hi to your grandfather."
Rachel looked concerned about something, though Trina wasn't sure what. Her daughter was staring at her with an expression that she hadn't seen often. One of concern, confusion, and fear. In her eyes was also a protective glint.
It left Trina wondering just how long Rachel had been in the room. Part of her hoped the girl hadn't just heard everything that had been said, but now wasn't the time to question.
"Are you sure, Mom?"
"Yes sweetie." Her instincts were telling her David truly wanted this opportunity. She'd still watch him though, that much was certain.
Well, what are your thoughts? What caught your eye? Do you think David can really accept them? What about Holly and Tori? At this point we know little about how they're doing, but do you think they'll want her back in their lives? David didn't seem confident, though he seems to have caused the most damage, so why do you suppose he was quick to let her back in?
