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Chapter 7

Harry lay there in bed thinking about what had happened with him and Alex, he couldn't believe that he had kissed him and had let him get close to him. He cursed himself that was all he seemed to be doing lately, but he also felt like he deserved it every time someone got close to him they got hurt or worse. Hearing the door to the dormitory door Harry rolled over and buried his head in the pillow until he heard footsteps, judging by the sound they were making the person was light and moving towards him. He knew in his heart who it was but really didn't want to face him, the next thing he knew a hand gently laid to rest on his shoulder.

"Harry are you ok?"

"Yes Ron I am fine now please go away."

"What happened?"

"Nothing I am just tired that is all."

"Did something happen with Alexander?"

"No please Ron I'll tell you in the morning"

"Fine"

With that Ron stormed off he could not believe that Harry had just cut him off, they were supposed to be best friends, and that meant that they were supposed to tell each other everything. Harry shut his eyes as he wept silently in to his pillow, he couldn't help but wish that Alex were there with him but at the same time he wanted to protect him for getting hurt and protect him from Voldemort. As he started to drift off to sleep Harry's mind thought back to his life in the Dursley household and back to a muggle song that he heard a few times when they Dursleys weren't home.

I will never know myself till I do this on my own

And I will never feel anything else until my wound are healed

And I will never make until I break away from me

I'll break away I'll find myself today

I wanna hear, I wanna feel what I thought was never real

I wanna live through all the pain I felt so long

I wanna find something I wanted all a long

Somewhere I belong

(Somewhere I belong – Linkin Park)

Harry jumped up with a start, realising that he must have cried himself to sleep; as the bright sun shone through the open window. Although not feeling hungry Harry walked down to the great hall; hoping to catch a glimpse of Alex. A picture formed in Harry's mind of that perfect face, those eyes that although they were black could warm up Harry's whole body, that perfect figure that made him look almost feminine, and most of all that long black hair that is always hanging loose around his face. The only way Harry could describe it was just got out of bed hair.

Harry bumped into the one person he did not want to Draco.

"Hey Potter looking for your boyfriend?"

"He is not my boyfriend Malfoy but have you seen Alex?"

"Ha ha ha the great Harry Potter doesn't know, I'm surprised that the mudblood hasn't figured it out."

"What are you talking about Malfoy I don't have time for your stupid games." Harry made to start walking off until he heard Draco laugh again before speaking in a voice that was only just loud enough for Harry to hear.

"Alex is Black, I heard the old man telling Severus"

"WHAT! You lying" Harry couldn't believe it if it was true why wouldn't Alex just tell him and why would Malfoy tell him, was he just messing with his head? Harry could feel the anger rising up inside him it felt like everyone was keeping things from him or lying to him and all for his own safety apparently.

Harry couldn't stop himself and before he know what he was doing he raised his fist punching Draco hard in the face, the two boys started fighting neither one stronger than the other. Draco pinned Harry to the floor and started punching him in the face and stomach. Harry pushed Draco off him and slowly rose to his feet only to be meet by Draco's knee hitting him in the groin. Neville knew he had to do something to help Harry pulling out his wand and shouting words that were impossible to hear from all the noise. Draco suddenly felt his legs lock and fell on his face.

Harry suddenly snapped out of his rage when he saw Alex stood watching him, he could see the shock and disappointment on his face, Harry looked down not wanting to see that look in his eyes anymore. He wanted to say something to make this all go away but he couldn't, there was no excuse for what he did.

"Harry what the hell is going on?"

"Alex I need to talk to you right now"

"So talk Harry"

"I love you, I realised last night and I wanted to show you but I was scared. I have never been in love before; everyone that has gotten close to me including Sirius who was the only family I had left and you know what he died because of me."

"Harry you can't keep thinking like that, people do the things they do because they love you and believe in you. Your parents, Cedric and most of all Sirius would not want you to give up because of what happened to them."

"He was my godfather and he was killed because I was stupid enough to be tricked by a guy that wants to kill me."

"Harry stop it….."

"No Alex you don't understand." Harry cut off Alex before he could finish what he was saying, he could feel that he was starting to lose his temper again.

"You are not my father Alex so stop acting as if you are."

"No I may not be you father but I am your godfather Harry."

"(Almost a whisper) Sirius"

Harry mustered all the strength he had in his body, he looked Alex in the eyes and slapped him. Feeling everyone in the great hall looking at him, Harry ran off with cold wet tears rolling down his face.

*Dumbledore's Office*

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Tell you what Harry?"

"About Sirius. You were suppose to care about me, you were like my father."

"Harry calm down."

"CALM DOWN I AM CALM"

"Harry…."

"SHUT UP FOR ONCE YOU STUPID, SELFISH, IGNORANT, SENILE OLD COOT!"

"Harry Potter don't you dare talk to the head like that"

Harry looked around and noticed that Professor McGonagall

"That is quite alright Minerva. Will you do me a favour? Please go and get Mr Black for me."

"Yes Professor."

Harry looked around when he heard the giant phoenix move then the large solid wood door open.

"Ah Alex sorry Sirius, do you want to explain to young Potter why you did what you did?"

"Yes Albus if you don't mind."

"Go ahead I think he has waited long enough to see you don't you Sirius?"

Sirius looked at Harry and motioned him to sit down.

"Well you see Harry when you saw my body fall, I didn't die Albus saved me. You know that is not safe for me to be seen but now Voldemort had received word I was alive. There was nowhere else for me to go, Professor Snape made me a potion so that I appeared your age; you know that Hogwarts is the safest place to be and I needed to be near you. I had to protect you and above all Harry I love you."

"You should have told me both of you, you knew that I needed to see you that was why you let me see you as Padfoot wasn't it?"

"Harry that was an accident."

"So you weren't even gonna tell me?"

"Yes I was trying to but I needed to know you loved me Harry."

"LOVED YOU…I WANTED TO DIE WHEN I LOST YOU (almost a whisper) first Cedric then you."

"Look at yourself Harry there was no way me or Sirius could tell you, you can't cope now you do know. It had to be a secret."

"What so you didn't trust me. Do you really hate me that much that you could keep this from me? You let me blame myself for the death of my only family left, the man I would have gave my life for in a heartbeat. Most of all the man I love more than anything in the world? Tell me Dumbledore what have I ever done to you?"

"I don't hate you, I never could and am truly sorry but now you can be together."

At these words both Harry and Sirius threw themselves in to each other's arms and started to cry on each other's shoulders.

"I love you Harry."

"I love you Sirius."