Voldie gets Flowers and a New Recruit

"Wormtail…" The Dark Lord sat back against his chair, sipping some evil brew in an abandoned house near his family's mansion.

"Y-y-yes, m'lord?" His minion squeaked, cowering like the rat he was in a corner.

"Extend your arm. We're calling a meeting." Wormtail reluctantly exposed his arm to his lord and held back a gasp of pain as the Dark Mark was activated. Almost instantly the room was filled with Death Eaters clad in black robes and masks. They gathered in a circle around the seated Voldemort and bowed. He stood and stalked around the room.

"My loyal followers. It comes to my attention that our activities have been, well, put bluntly, less than evil lately. Snape, when was the last time you murdered a muggle?" One figure tilted his head in contemplation.

"I dunno, maybe a month from last Tuesday?" Voldemort frowned.

"Exactly! The Order is becoming suspicious. They think we're up to something." Another figure raised his hand.

"And that's… bad?" Voldemort growled and pulled the mask off of none other than Lucius Malfoy.

"Yes! The problem is that we're NOT up to something! We haven't been for ages! We're going soft!"

"That sounds like a personal problem." Jim the Ups man said standing beside Voldemort.

"Woah! Jim the Ups man, where'd you come from!" An eyebrow or two raised themselves among the group.

"Oh, right. Delivery!" It was then that the most feared wizard in the world noticed the bundle of flowers his brown, khaki-clad friend was holding.

"White roses!"

"Yep. Gotta card too. Says 'Sorry I couldn't make it. Recruiting. Not really, but that's my excuse. Love, Moosk.' Sign here please." Voldemort signed it, took the flowers, and bit off a bud.

"Recruiting my a—"

"Look, here she comes now!" Lucius shouted over the peeved Lord's statement. And indeed here she did come. Dressed in a lilac and baby blue robe, toting another girl behind her. This one was dressed in a dark green robe. Voldemort gave the girls a death glare and shook his fist at them.

"Where the hell were you! I called a meeting! Every Death Eater should be here when I call the damn meeting!" At this point he was fuming. And spiting all over the girls.

"Chill, Voldie. This is JD. She's your newest recruit." She wiped away a bit of saliva that had found her face. "And say it, don't spray it." JD smiled and nodded.

"Well, you work on that problem, and we'll go bake cookies." The new girl turned to leave but was stopped by a hand on her arm. She turned to look at Draco.

"Can you make some chocolate chip? I love chocolate chip cookies." At this, other members nodded, and several quiet agreements could be heard.

"NO MORE OF THOSE POTTER COOKIES!"

As the door closed behind them JD whispered behind her hand, "Is it working?"

"You can't begin to imagine! Did you see that vein popping out of his forehead?"

"Yeah, I thought it was going to explode when I mentioned cookies."

"I must say, that list is by far your best idea yet!"

"And that's saying something!"