A/N: I hope you guys are liking this! There's gonna be a joking around of Slash but no ACTAUL slash. No worries, I wouldn't do that with a child in the story too! That'd be just... TOO much! Lol. I hope you enjoy the slightly awkward moments ahead. I thought they were FUUUUUNNY!
Disclaimer: I don't own SPN or anything related to it! I only own Vixen and the Plot Bunny that birthed this story!
SEASON FIVE SPOILERS! POSSIBLY GOING INTO SEASON SIX AS WELL!
Vixen sat on Bobby's lap as he moped. Sure, she didn't get why he was sad exactly but she knew she didn't like it. She patted his hairy cheek and giggled at him. Maybe she could make him giggle too? Laughing was funny. She bounced in his lap as she thought. Maybe she could-
Suddenly she burst into laughter at the sight of her feet. They were so… silly looking! Bobby frowned at her and she just couldn't stop laughing. How could he not be laughing? Look at them! Her feet were weird! Look, Bobby, look!
Bobby plopped her down on the hospital floor, stopping her laughter short. Wha-? Oh, the angel was there. Bobby looked like he expected something from the angel, "Enough foreplay." What? Foreplay? What's that?
"Get over here and lay yer damn hands on me!" Bobby demanded in such a tone that Vixen had no idea why the angel didn't move to do as he was told. Was he stupid? Maybe he didn't hear Bobby. Well, if that was the case…
Vixen crawled over to Cas and smacked her hands against his leg, "Ba ba ba ba ba!" She said, though, what she really said was, "Bobby's talkin' to you! Do what he wants you dumb angel!"
"I can't." Castiel grumbled, looking curiously down at Vixen. He dropped her into Daddy's arms. Vixen snuggled close, resting her head in the crook of Daddy's neck.
"Say again." Bobby hissed out. Vixen's eyes widened and she just knew the angel was in trouble. Castiel sighed and faced Bobby.
"I am cut off from Heaven and much of Heaven's power. Certain things I can do. Certain things I can't." Castiel said. Was he trying to say sorry? Vixen thought he was really bad at it.
"You mean you lost your mojo just in time for me to get stuck in this trap for the rest of my life?" Bobby looked red. Was he okay? Vixen leaned towards him, clenching and unclenching her fists.
"Be be be be! Ya de ba be!" She whined, but quieted down when Daddy made shushing noises in her ear and kissed her cheek. Translation: "Bobby, Bobby! It's okay, Bobby!"
"I'm sorry." Castiel said. There it is! Vixen sniffled a little, rubbing at her eyes tiredly. Cas walked back over to Daddy and Dean, "I don't have much time. We need to talk." Daddy nodded and followed Dean and Castiel out into the hallway, "Your plan to kill Lucifer…"
"Yeah? You wanna help?" Dean asked, wetting his lips.
"No, it's foolish. It can't be done."
"Oh, thanks for the support." Dean grimaced.
"But I believe I have the solution. There is someone besides Michael strong enough to take on Lucifer. Strong enough to stop the apocalypse." Castiel said and Vixen knew that Daddy and Dean were going to want to hear this. She yawned, blinking tiredly.
"Who's that?" Daddy asked, rocking Vixen softly. Did he want her to sleep? She gazed up at him for a moment before deciding- yes, he wanted her to sleep. She curled up against his chest, gripping his shirt, and passed out.
"The one who resurrected me and put you on that airplane. The one who began everything. God." Cas said, shocking Sam. Dean frowned and Sam knew he was trying to ascertain if their friend had finally lost it, "I'm gonna find God."
Sam glanced around the hallway and ushered the three of them back into Bobby's room, "Let's talk about this somewhere less public." Sam said, making sure that Vixen was still out. It was like she was doing it just to please him. Could she be that perceptive?
Well, she was half demon. Though, she was half him too. So, that probably made the psychic in her more active, "God?" Dean asked, bringing Sam back to the current conversation.
"Yes." Cas said, as though this were a totally normal conversation to have.
"God?" Dean asked again.
"Yes! He isn't in Heaven. He has to be somewhere."
"Try New Mexico," Dean Said, making a joke out it, "I hear he's on a tortilla."
Castiel frowned, tilting his head to the side. Come one Dean, Sam thought, do you enjoy making the angel suffer like this?
"No, he's not on any flat bread." Castiel mumbled. Sam would have thought the angel was joking but then he remembered that this was Cas and Cas was… inept.
"Listen Chuckles," Dean began, "even if there is a God, he's either dead, and that's the generous theory,"
"He is out there, Dean." Castiel insisted.
"-or he's up and kicking and he just doesn't give a rat's ass about any of us." Castiel glared intensely at Dean. Sam figured he'd either have to step in sometime soon to make sure his idiot brother didn't get creamed by an angel or that Castiel would just vanish like he usually did.
Sam hoped for the second option. He'd rather not get in the middle of a pissed off angel and his desired target, "I mean, look around you, man. The world is in the toilet. We are literally at the end of days here, and he's off somewhere drinking booze out of a coconut. Alright?"
"Enough." Castiel hissed, showing quite a bit of emotion for a celestial being, "This is not a theological issue- it's strategic. With God's help, we can win."
"It's a pipe dream, Cas." Dean sighed.
"I killed two angels this week. My brothers. I'm hunted. I rebelled. And I did it, all of it, for you, and you failed. You and your brother destroyed the world and I lost everything, for nothing. So keep your opinions to yourself."
Sam kept his eyes downcast and his mouth shut, "You didn't pop in to tear us a new one. So what did you want?" Bobby asked the question that had been burning inside Sam for a while.
"I did come for something. An amulet. Very rare, very powerful. It burns hot in God's presence."
Sam couldn't help it, "A God EMF?" He inquired, hoping not to get a scathing mad look from the angel. To his immense relief Castiel nodded.
"Well, I don't know what you're talking about. I got nothing like that." Bobby grunted, quirking his eyebrow at Castiel.
"I know you don't." The angel locked eyes with Dean for a second before moving his gaze down to Dean's neck.
"What, this?" Dean asked, his voice squeaking a little.
"Yes. May I borrow it?"
"No!" Dean barked out, his fingers curling around the metal.
"Dean. Give it to me." Sam squirmed a little. Eye sex between his brother and the angel aside that comment could be taken very differently if you were an outsider.
"Alright, I guess." Dean mumbled, pulling the necklace over his head and dropping it into the angels waiting hand, "Just… don't lose it." Dean warned. Dean grimaced and rolled his shoulders, "Great, now I feel naked."
La la la! Sam thought, I don't hear this! "I'll be in touch." Castiel says and disappears. Option two, it would seem.
"When you find God, tell him to bring legs!" Bobby shouted towards the ceiling, making Sam chuckle.
So? What did you think?
