Chapter 7

Albus stared at the familiar figure, standing so proudly as the wave of students walked around him, on their way to class. Only his cousin Louis could pull off looking like he already owned the place on the first day of school. The Prefect began making his way over to them, his walk determined and with purpose.

"So, so dead Akuji." He said, coming to a stop.

"Why, whatever did I do?" Akuji asked with an innocent whine, but also a mischievous grin on her face that gave her away completely.

"Polyjuice potion?! You've completely lost your mind; very, very sloppy of you." Louis explained. "You've been pulling pranks like this ever since you've got here. Finally, it is with great pleasure that, as a prefect, I'm going to be the one who personally reports you. If you'd please accompany me."

"Polyjuice? Is that some form of troll regurgitation ? Why, dear Louis, if I didn't know better I'd say you've had a tongue twister hex placed on you- unless it's a simple case of genetic gingivitis?" Akuji retorted with an ever widening smile.

Albus couldn't help looking between the two participants of the conversation wonderingly as Akuji changed her voice to a light, airy tune to give the perfect image of a cultured young lady, rather than the wise-talking classmate he was just getting used to. He turned with the intent of asking James about this, but his brother was watching the exchange with undisguised glee, so Albus decided to copy him and quietly observe the outcome.

"As you wish Akuji, play dumb." Louis said, annoyed. "Albus, James, get to class. Akuji's coming with me."

"Oh, Louis, would you stop already. I know you adore me, but this really isn't the time or place for it." Akuji continued sweetly. "Now would you look? The crowd's cleared out. We're going to be late, and it's Albus's first day. Shame on you."

Albus looked around, and only now did he discover that the area was indeed cleared out. They had even lost Crevan it would seem.

"Come on Louis, she's got a point. You're holding us up." James complained. Not because he cared about attendance records, but because he disliked spending more than necessary quantities of time delighting in the company of his perfect Prefect cousin.

"I told you two to get to class already." Louis argued. "This is between Akuji, the headmaster, and I."

All of them were taken off guard when the voice reverberated through the hall. Their eyes snapped to the entrance as the frail old man stepped into the hall, leaning heavily on his cane.

"What have we here? Students out of class?" Argus Filch asked. "Mmm, mmm, we are in trouble."

"Could you speak up old man? I think your catch phrase is losing some of its magic." Akuji said.

"Akuji!" James growled, elbowing her in the sides.

"Ow, dick!" Akuji returned a growl of her own, before kicking James in the knee. James quickly recoiled, grabbing his knee and rubbing it fiercely.

"My good Filch," Louis said, addressing the caretaker in a diplomatic tone of to state the obvious. "I'm a prefect; I was just lecturing these students about being out of class. I'm sure they've learned their lesson."

"No," Filch responded, shaking his head. "No, I think I heard the word Polyjuice. No, I think you'd best come to the Headmaster's office with me. I hope you enjoyed your breakfast, it's the last you'll be having at Hogwarts."

It was in near silence that Albus followed Filch and the others through the hall and up the stairs, on the way to what he assumed was the Headmaster's office. By the time the group arrived at the third floor, the boy was practically shaking.

"Don't worry," James reassured his brother quietly, as to not be overheard. "We didn't do anything, Akuji's the only one that will get in trouble."

"You wish." Akuji retorted just as quietly, but much more cheerfully. "Evidence being in sore lack, I'm walking away from this scot free."

"Just shut up and let me do the talking, I'm a prefect, they'll listen to me." Louis snapped, keeping his voice down to avoid being heard by the caretaker.

"How generous of you to make up for being the reason we're even here." Akuji blandly replied.

"We're here," Filch said, just a little too gleefully, pulling up in front of a gargoyle statue.

Albus came to a stop, staring up at the massive gargoyle that stood before them. If he hadn't been raised in the wizarding world, he would have jumped when it lowered its head to look at them. "Password?" it asked, voice deep and gravely.

"Pu..." Filch began, before stopping himself. He stood there, blinking for a moment. "The password is... er..." Filch muttered, scratching his head.

"What's wrong old man? Your Alzheimer's acting up?" Akuji quipped, smirking.

"Why you…" Filch growled, raising his cane.

Albus almost though he saw Akuji twitch her hand a little closer to the side where her wand was kept. But before the situation could go any further, a voiced filled the hall.

"Mr. Filch, can I help you?"

Albus turned to see Professor Franks marching down the hall towards them. Her robes outlandishly large, they dragged on the floor behind her as she came to a stop a couple feet from the little group.

"Professor," Filch began, lowering his cane. "I was attempting to get in to see the Headmaster, but I can't seem to recall the password."

"What seems to be the problem with these students?" Franks asked, looking at the group.

"Professor, if I could..." Louis began, but Filch cut him off.

"Quiet you," He snapped at Louis. "These students... I can't remember... but obviously they're out of class!"

"Yes, well, there are more important matters to attend to at the moment, send them back to class." Franks responded.

"I'd rather have the Headmaster..." Filch began to argue, but was cut off in turn.

"I am the Headmaster, you dolt! And as you can clearly see, I'm indisposed by this bloody Polyjuice prank." Franks, or rather, the Headmaster said, a fierce look on his/her face. He turned his attention to Albus, Akuji, James and Louis. "You four get back to class."

"Thank you ma'am... er, sir. As a prefect of..." Louis began, but was cut off when Akuji snagged a finger in his collar and began dragging him down the hall, pushing James and Albus in front of her.

"As for you, Filch, I'm sure the dungeons could use a good sweeping." was the last thing Albus heard before Franks… the Headmaster slammed the door to the corridor behind her.