Lily was about six months pregnant now. It was almost midnight and she was hovering outside James' flat. The baby was wide awake and was moving and kicking so much she couldn't sleep. She had been at work since the night before and was really tired, so tired she had actually cried when she realised the baby was not going to let her sleep. She had thought about going to see Calvin, he would be nice and say nice things and comfort her. But she wanted James; he knew her so well, he always said the right thing and knew what to do to make her feel better. She just wanted James. So she came to James's but she didn't think she should go in. She had found out the day before that James and Sirius were going on a double date, and Lily didn't want to interrupt James and some girl 'getting to know each other'. She really didn't want to know if he was having sex with someone else, she preferred it live under a cloud of denial. So now she was hovering.
But the baby had other ideas, it decided to jump on her bladder until she had no choice but to knock on James' door, just to use the bathroom. It was a few minutes until she heard someone come to the door. It was Sirius, who sometimes he stayed at James's, which was just one weird aspect of their friendship but Lily was used to it. It didn't even occur to her to think it was odd.
"Lily! What are you doing here?" he asked, surprised to see her in the middle of the night.
"I really have to pee," said Lily, pushing Sirius out of the way and going to the bathroom.
When she came out Sirius was leaning against the wall opposite, looking at her.
"What? I really had to pee," said Lily.
"Okay, I didn't say anything," said Sirius, holding up his hands.
"Good," said Lily.
"Are you here to see James?"
"No, no. I won't disturb him, I was just… it's okay, I'll just be going," said Lily awkwardly. She had spotted candles in the living room on her way to the bathroom, obviously something had happened and she still didn't want to think about James with someone else.
"I'll just get him, he understands you when I can't," said Sirius cautiously. Lily's face was tearstained and he knew James would murder him if he let her leave when she was upset about something.
"No really I'm…" Lily protested but trailed off when she realised Sirius had already disappeared into James bedroom.
A few seconds later Sirius came back out followed by James. James had obviously been in bed, he was only wearing a pair of boxers, his hair was sticking out at odd angles and he was scrunching his eyes as if trying to adjust them to the light.
"Lily… you've been crying," he said, although she had no idea how he knew that, he had barely opened his eyes. Sirius must have told him.
"It's nothing… just hormones," said Lily. "I'm sorry I didn't mean to disturb you."
"You're not. I told you to come to me anytime," said James, removing his hands from his face.
"I was just being silly… I'm tired. You should get back to your um… friend," she said awkwardly.
"You think he got lucky tonight?" laughed Sirius. "The date was such a disaster, I didn't even get any because of him."
"What?"
"He wouldn't shut up about baby stuff all night. I swear he was talking about that baby Quidditch thingy for over an hour," said Sirius, none too amused. "You do not talk about having kids with a woman on the first date, especially one we picked up in a bar."
"Yeah I'm a little rusty," said James sheepishly, scratching the back of his head.
"So thanks to him, we're both lonely tonight," said Sirius. "Now if you'll excuse me I'm going to get some sleep." And he went into the spare room.
"What's going on Lily?" James asked, leading her into the living room and sitting down on the sofa next to her.
"What baby Quidditch was Sirius talking about?" asked Lily suspiciously.
"Oh I got the baby a set so that they understand Quidditch. It's little figures that fly around and play the game over the crib, over 300 games," said James excitedly.
"You mean instead of a mobile?"
"Yeah."
"That's cute," said Lily, meaning how excited James was about it.
"So back to you. Why have you been crying?" said James, knowing that Lily was trying to change the subject.
"It was nothing really," said Lily feeling silly, then she felt a huge kick. "Oh my God."
"What? What?" said James, panicked.
"Feel this," said Lily, grabbing his hand and placing it on her stomach.
"Wow, that was a big one," said James, he was always amazed when he felt the baby move or kick. He felt such overwhelming love for the baby it scared him. How could he love someone so much before they are even born?
"Yeah it was, it's been happening all night," Lily grumbled.
"Is that why you're here and why you've been crying?"
"Pathetic, huh?"
"A little," James teased.
"I couldn't sleep but I worked an 18 hour shift — don't look at me like that I had to — and I'm so tired."
"Okay," said James, trying to think of a way to help.
"So I need you to… discipline the fetus."
"Pardon?" asked James, making sure he had heard right.
"Discipline the fetus for keeping me awake. I already tried I threatened to do everything I could think of to him, but he won't listen. So it's your turn."
"Think about what you just said," James said incredulously. "I can't discipline the baby they aren't even born yet."
"Well do something to make it stop," whined Lily.
"Okay, okay come here," said James. He sat back on the corner of the sofa, pulled his arm around Lily's waist and pulled her down with him. He placed his hands on her stomach and gently rubbed small circles on it.
"Wow… it stopped," Lily whispered ten minutes later. "How did you do that?"
"I think the baby just needed to know that Daddy was here to calm Mummy down," James whispered, breathing in Lily's scent. It had been a long time since he had been this close to her.
"That's amazing."
"Well hopefully you can get some sleep now," he said softly into her ear. "Stay here tonight, it's too late to go back to your place and the moving around might wake the baby again."
"Okay."
James wordlessly picked Lily up and carried her to his bedroom, and gently placed her on the bed. He kissed the top of her bed and made to go out of the room.
"Where are you going?" Lily asked sleepily.
"I'm going to sleep on the couch," he said softly.
"Don't be silly, stay here. It's your bed, and the brat might wake up and kick the crap out of me again," said Lily.
"Are you sure?" he asked. He didn't want to make her uncomfortable.
"Of course. I promise not to jump you," she joked.
"Awwww way to spoil my fun," he moaned.
"Shut up and go to sleep."
She had definitely been right to come to James, she felt so relaxed now. James always knew how it make everything seem better.
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Later that night, James was lying next to Lily, wide awake. She was asleep, and had been asleep for hours. But James couldn't sleep. He rolled over and slid his arm round her waist, hoping he didn't wake her. He lay there trying to remember the last time he had just held her, and he couldn't. How could he have gone months without just holding his own wife? Maybe if he had just every so often taken the time to hold her and let her know how much he loved her, things would have worked out and they would be together now. Every night James still agonized over why he had suggested a separation and now his reasons just seemed like complete nonsense, it was nothing a little time and communication couldn't have solved. He had given up too quickly and had lost his wife. He was an idiot and he knew it.
"My beautiful, beautiful wife," James whispered, kissing Lily's forehead. Then he removed his arm from her waist and rolled back over to the other side of the bed.
BAD READERS!!!!!!!! I didn't get 10 reviews for this chapter so really I shouldn't be posting but I didn't say that in the last chapter and so I am posting. This time I want 15 before I post again. I mean it.
