What's taking him so long?

Temari tapped her hand against her fan, the only sound beside the wind in the upper levels of the guard post. There were four shinobi stationed with her. One approached her, not speaking until he was at her side.

"Lady Temari. Your shift ended fifteen minutes ago." He glanced at her, taking note of the thinned lips and rhythmic tapping on her fan. It remained closed on her back, but the cold metal gleamed in the moonlight.

"If you are feeling tense I would advise you go to the hot rocks massage, not stare out here." He tried to smile at her but her eyes refused to meet his. She continued to stare out into the night.

"I know how to manage stress Takahino. You're dismissed." She still didn't look at him.

Takahino sighed, turning back to the other three guards. He didn't meet their eyes when he approached so they gave him space as he descended the stairs.

When she had taken the second guard's shift, a quiet presence appeared in the door that led back to the stairs. She glanced at him, forcing her hands to her sides. Gaara moved to stand by her and looked into the desert. They were silent for a while.

"I haven't launched the investigation." Temari flinched, looking at him. His voice was louder in the dark and hoarser then it had been a few hours ago. He met her startled expression with a sidelong glance before he continued.

"I saw how tense you became as the hours counted down so I withheld it." Temari tried to smile at him, but he had already looked away.

"Councillor Han will be very distraught. He may lose more hair." She looked out too, but felt his chakra fluctuating as he swayed on the spot. Her humor struck him like a rubber ball on a stone wall. She sighed, narrowing her eyes.

"I shouldn't even ask but did you even try to get any rest today?" She said.

"No. I work in the daytime."

"And nighttime. And all the time." She began tapping her fan again. An irregular, absentminded rhythm. Gaara's eyes were drawn to the sound. He watched her nervous habit as she continued to stare stonily away.

"Does my work schedule bother you?" He said. Her jaw tightened.

"No. Not your official one. It's just… You sound like you've been gargling gravel. You're barely awake and I know, I just know you're in pain." Her voice cracked on the last word and she looked at him. Their eyes met and for a moment her expression was raw and terrified. They both looked away, embarrassed. He spoke while she attempted to clear her throat without sounding like she was clearing her throat.

"I have tried… I have tried to rest but my body will not last much longer. Like this. I plan on leaving in an hour, if Kankuro doesn't return."

She drew in a slow breath. He continued, watching her hand move from her fan to clench into a fist at her side.

"You'll be in charge while I'm away. Kankuro will be assigned to the civilian management and you to the shinobi management. Baki will oversee the litigation but no new laws are to be passed, unless it's one that would supersede me anyway." His voice rose at odd times when he spoke. There was an audible strain as he listed off the assignments. A thought flew into Temari's mind fast as Takamaru.

Hug him. Let him lean his weight against your shoulder and rest for a moment. Her fist unclenched in surprise. She straightened up, sending the thought away with a clear message.

My touch is not a comfort. For anyone.

"You're going to go wandering? That's good. I'll inform Kankuro when he returns."

"Where did he go?"

"Just be patient." She scanned the horizon again, willing Kankuro to appear. With a believable alibi. Or alone with a plan. She stilled under Gaara's relentless look but he had become more complaisant as the two days had passed, fatigue making him borderline delirious. The threat he carried was no longer external.

The councilors had attempted to push their more radical policies but she had shot them down every time. It was taking its toll on her, having to be by his side at every meeting. He had taken to following her places out of habit and expecting her to shadow him during the day. He spoke less and less, allowing her to speak more and more aggressively to his advisors. More aggressively then she already did, which was a high standard. Because of that his look now was familiar. It was a cloudy sort of indifference. He did not know why she was withholding information, he may not even remember what she was withholding, but he would wait until she worked out what he had difficulty grasping.

"He's gone for a bit but he'll return. With good news. I think. He's bringing something we need." She said, more to herself.

"Kankuro?" He spoke softly, a light crease forming in his forehead as he focused. The word was a gentle question, an explicit show of his mental limitations. Her throat tightened.

"Yes. Kankuro." Her voice was softer too. "He'll be back soon. I don't know when but he'll be back."

Gaara nodded, swaying as he did. He continued to stare down at her feet. When he looked up she was watching him, her hands in loose fists at her side. The thought she had banished flew in again, trying to roost in her chest.

"Will he be back? If he left…" Gaara's face darkened as he spoke. He straightened up, turning toward the stairs.

"I'm going to try resting again. If he has not returned by the time I'm finished then I'll go out. Do not disturb me."

Ten minutes after he left eight figures manifested on the horizon. A shinobi appeared at her side within seconds of her noticing them.

"There are six Leaf shinboi, one shinobi dog, and Lord Kankuro approaching the eastern gate." He said through his Anbu mask. She noddedto him, hiking her fan higher onto her shoulder.

"I'll go greet them at the gate. Do not inform anyone else."

When the group arrived she was the only visible figure in the narrow slice between the high stone walls. Kankuro had lagged to the back, occasionally correcting their progress. The landscape had changed since their visit almost a year ago. When he saw Temari, he slowed down even more, so that he walked up from the back of the group after the others had stopped.

Tenten and Shikamaru ran up first, their respective teams trailing behind them. No one spoke as Temari glared cooly past them to her brother, who sauntered up from behind.

"You're almost late." She said.

"That means I'm not." He replied.

"Why didn't you head out after dinner? You know what a headache you caused me?"

"Don't even mention headaches to me! You see what I'm dragging?" He jerked a thumb behind him to the cluster of Leaf shinobi. Ino crossed her arms, pinch-faced at his words.

"What the fuck, man? We just ran across the desert to help your ungrateful little brother!" Kiba said, leaning forward and baring his fangs. Temari turned her glare to him.

"Stay out of this. Also, yes we appreciate your help."

"Doesn't seem like it." Tenten said, placing a hand on her hip. She had to lean over to look past Choji, who had began to nervously search his pockets. He let out a small belch then quickly excused himself. Temari matched Tenten's posture, making Choji squirm and lean away.

"Why did you decide to come along, little girl? This is a serious mission and we can't afford to play around." She sneered at her, eyes going hungry for a fight. For the past few days she had been itching to beat the councillors, to grab Gaara and shake him, to attack Baki for his unwavering loyalty to the wrong people. She saw an opportunity and savored it, eliminating the others in her mind. Her vision zeroed in on Tenten's face going red as she sneered back; not Choji who shuffled off or Lee who moved up close to her other side. Or Kankuro, who sighed and stepped back.

"Why would I come here to waste my time? I shouldn't have come at all! We all rushed to the aid of your family and here you are being an ungrateful... bitch the minute we show up!" Tenten said, clenching her fists.

"I was informed that the Leaf's finest were coming. If I knew they were mocking me then I would have had you returned once you breached our borders."

"I am part of the Leaf's finest! But you're just… Just…" Tenten's eyes began to water but she was far from crying. She shook with anger. Lee placed one hand onto her shoulder but she refused to look at him. Kankuro stayed quiet but moved his hand up to tug on his hood. Temari's eyes caught the movement. They exchanged looks and she leaned back again, lips thinning. Tenten saw her hesitation and a deep anger began to squirm inside her, pushing against a tight, hard shell. It began to gnaw through the shell at the perceived opportunity, spilling hot rage into her body; a baby snake hatching in her heart. She spat the venom before she could stop herself.

"Not only that, but Gaara didn't even want our help! You're all too proud to accept your limitations! Especially your ungrateful little brother; who's so damn determined to be invincible he'll probably die in the next few weeks!"

The slap came fast. Had the shock of Tenten's words not been so strong it could have been easily intercepted. Akamaru's flanks tensed as he focused keenly on Kiba, who didn't see it coming. Lee saw it and tightened his grip on his teammate's shoulder. She didn't fall back as a result, catching the horrified look on Temari's face. Who retracted her hand as though it had been stabbed.

"Nice." Kankuro said in the silent aftermath as he stepped closer to the two, practically between them. Lee stepped forward too, along with Kiba, flanking Tenten on either side. Ino moved to Tenten's right side, a bit away from the others but closer than she was before.

"Just because we're on your front doorstep you think you can attack us?! We should dump off the rough anecdote Sakura made and leave you! Whatever happens to your ungrateful family happens!" She said, jutting her hip out and tossing her hair. Akamaru opened his mouth, smiling widely as he began to salivate. His flanks tensed again. Choji had become very still as his heartbeat accelerated. Shikamaru spoke fast.

"Enough guys. Look, I don't know why you two are at each other's throats and I don't care. We're here to do a mission, regardless of how anyone feels about it or each other. Temari."

She had lowered her hand, balling it into a fist at her side. Her shoulder just barely brushed against Kankuro's. She looked to Shikamaru, face a cold mask. He continued, giving her a watered down glare.

"We need to fill you in on the details of the mission and the longer we're out here the worse it looks. I'm sure your guards have already spotted us."

She squared her shoulders, leaning closer to Kankuro for a moment. He nearly leaned away, but stayed very still instead.

"You're right." She said as she turned and began to walk back into the glow of the alley.

Her body seemed to disappear into fog but it was only the moonlight, coruscate white and thick as fog. The color of her darkened into bluish black, like a bruise. Then the Temari-shaped bruise began to fade at the edges, blurring into a dark blob. The others watched her go, not from hesitancy but to distance themselves. Kankuro watched too, for a time, then tugged on his hood.

"There's no excuse, but she's going through a lot." He nearly whispered. The night carried it like full words. Shikamaru spoke up as he stepped to the side, closer to Choji, who had unintentionally moved to his side in the confrontation.

Tenten clamped her mouth shut, the redness in her face looking black in the night. Like her face had been blasted with soot. Lee continued to hold her shoulder, even as she pulled slightly away from him. He spoke low, like Kankuro, but his voice carried farther.

"You are right. There is no excuse. But we just want to help Gaara so why would she pinpoint my friend?" Tenten blushed harder at 'friend' instead of 'teammate', shame twisting her mouth into a jagged line. Kankuro's face paint hid any darkening, his paste mask was black slashes against painfully bright white.

"Because Temari's the kind of woman who keeps a family together by keeping them alive. She can't keep Gaara alive without his consent. So she's watching him rot. We all are." He said, pulling the hood down even farther.

"Well that doesn't mean she can pick on Tenten." Ino said. Kiba glanced at her, nodding even though she wasn't looking at him.

"Yeah. We're not going to let that happen."

Kankuro shrugged, moving away from them. The others followed, breaking out of their tight group as if walking alone.

They filed into the guard tower. The lights were off but Temari had pulled back a curtain, spilling cold light into the black room. The seats were still warm.

"So here's the idea-" Kankuro began. Temari held up her hand against the window, moving out of the sphere of light as she re-checked the entrances. She returned as a presence near her brother's shoulder. He continued when they had all stepped carefully into the darkness.

"Why are you being so paranoid? Seriously, I'm almost sorry I came back."

"There's been unrest."

"There's always unre-"

"Not like this. I'll tell you when you fill me in on the details of the plan."

Tenten and Lee had stayed opposite Temari, showing both restraint and respect by keeping their eyes level with her's. She did them the service of pretending not to notice, but moving further away from Kankuro's side. Easier target; in case the insult lingered. Kiba picked up the conversation.

"So what we decided to say is that you requested our help-"

"What?" Temari interrupted. "I thought you were going to think of a plan! Not go right out and say the truth." Kankuro chuckled. Kiba grinned at her. A small, lopsided grin that showed one gleaming fang. It was an intentional and playful threat. Akamaru stepped to his side and opened his mouth, showing his fangs too. His tail wagged once, mechanically.

"Hey, your brother said the same thing. But I think we'd better focus on getting our facts straight, otherwise our stay here will be either really short or really, really long." He waited for a moment, uncharacteristically still. All the Leaf tuned themselves to Temari and her movements, who became still in response.

"So the plan is that you requested our help to investigate a disease that originated here and is plaguing our home. That bit is true. It's a merchant disease. So we're saying it's because you guys are dirty and we've been trading with you that our people got sick and now we need to go to the source to find a cure."

"Kiba…" Shikamaru sighed heavily, reaching into his pocket for a cigarette.

"Well that's the plan you guys said." Kiba shrugged. Akamaru sat down, opening his mouth and letting his tongue loll out.

"Not like… Oh never mind, keep explaining." Shikamaru said, frowning at the empty carton his pocket yielded.

"So you're also crucial to this. You're the one who's going to give us the clearance we need to access the medical files of the village. Oh, and get us Gaara's file too."

"That's impossible." Temari said, voice slicing through the dark. The others looked to where they could sense, more than see, her standing.

"If you had come a few days ago it would have been possible, but I waited too long to request help. As Gaara's strength diminishes it's become like a the smell of blood near a Poliste colony. They've all but swarmed on him."

"A Poliste is a paper wasp; they're really common and use blood as adhesive for building their nests. Huge things. If you see them swarming you've got time, but once they descend you're dead." Kankuro said, shifting his weight to the other foot as he did. Temari continued as if he hadn't spoken.

"The councillors have been trying to isolate Gaara and use him like a puppet to push their more radical policies. They proposed something ridiculous the other day-"

"Oh man, you've gotta tell me about that at home."

"-So if I step out any further it'll be the same as stepping onto a trip wire. They might even launch an investigation against me, but I don't think it's gotten that far." She focused on Kankuro, who felt the shift and lost his playful demeanor.

"You've got to do it." She said.

He didn't immediately respond. In the silence the others focused on him as well. Everyone but Lee could sense his indecision.

"I probably shouldn't. I just ran out of the village for the better part of two days. I'm sure someone's going to be watching me." He finally said.

"More people are watching me. And you run off all the time so what difference does it make?"

"Yeah well this time I brought foreigners back with me. Everyone pays attention to foreigners."

"You're the best option. The councillors can only focus on one thing at a time so I'll just keep doing what I've been doing and keep their attention. You backup the Leaf."

"What have you been doing?"

Temari hesitated, glancing quickly to where she felt Shikamaru's chakra. He felt it, as well as her immediate embarrassment, but didn't respond.

"Well… Gaara's been requesting I come with him to meetings."

"Ok. How's you going to a few meetings going to stir up the councillors? You drop by occasionally anyway."

"It hasn't been occasionally." She said, pulling her anxiety in like pulling on a coat. Kankuro turned toward her, eyes narrowing into slits even though it was a wasted gesture.

"What do you mean?"

"I mean he ordered me to come to a routine briefing. And then the actual meeting. And then every other meeting since then." She said, leaning away from him. Kankuro thought for a moment.

"Well. Shit. That's pretty awful."

"Why?" Tenten said, more aggressive then she intended. The others focused on her as their bodies remained motionless. Kankuro spoke quickly.

"Because having a relative attend every meeting is only what Kazekages do when grooming the next heir. As Gaara's older sister though it's inappropriate unless he plans to resign; which is always inappropriate. Also, Gaara's still really young, so behavior like this is seen as extra dependent. He's going to look like a child and a child in the Kazekage robes is incompetent, no matter who it is. But for it to be Gaara only works against him more since there are just So. Many. People who would like to see him dead that they're constantly sniffing around for a sign of weakness."

Lee's mouth formed into a determined and unhappy line. He moved away from Tenten, raising his hand in the darkness.

"Um, excuse me." He said. "But if there are so many people against Gaara why do we not ask him for help? We are his allies and I know that I would like to know that there are those who support me."

"That's nice. But anyone willing to come forward and openly support Gaara is basically saying they support everything about him. Every decision he has ever made. Which is the same to the older generation, the ones in charge right now, as signing yourself off as a traitor to Suna." Temari said.

"But what if you simply wish for better health and support him? No one agrees with every decision others make." He replied. Temari's eyes softened even as her face hardened.

"We can wish for better health and work to make it happen, but not while being friendly about it. Rock Lee. You have to understand; kindness will get you killed here. Don't be obvious about your feelings for anyone, otherwise it'll be seen as grossly affectionate. Do you understand what I mean?"

Lee thought for a moment, then slowly shook his head.

"No. I do not understand. How can being friendly be seen as inappropriate? Who could survive under those circumstances?"

"It's the way we live in order to survive. People die all the time. Not just shinobi, but civilians. Children. They die of sour water, a cut finger, sickness, playing too long outside, speaking to the wrong people, forgetting to close the windows, anything. To openly show sorrow would mean that all of Suna would be in mourning. We would all die of grief for the ones we love. The only time anyone is ever excited about someone else is when they can't help themselves; usually as young friends or right before a wedding. Still following me?"

He nodded slowly, uncertainly. She went on anyway.

"If you go around speaking openly to anyone about wanting to support Gaara when the whole village is turning against him, they'll exaggerate your affection into something else. You'll be shamed but worse than that, you won't be taken seriously anymore."

Lee squared his shoulders, lifting his head.

"That will not be a problem for me. I am used to not being taken seriously but I can give them a reason to nevertheless. They will not underestimate me long." He replied, unintentionally flexing his arms.

"Exceptional skills as a shinobi are valuable and the only thing that can surpass any rules, sure, but you don't want people thinking something else right?" Temari tried again. There was a notable strain in her voice.

"What Temari's saying is that people will think you've got the hots for Gaara by openly praising him." Kankuro said, stepping a bit into the light. Ino and Tenten's cheeks darkened a moment before Lee's did. He began shaking his hands back and forth frantically, stepping into the light as well.

"Oh! No! Definitely not! I did not mean it that way!" All of the Leaf were in various stages of discomfort. Lee spoke again after swallowing loudly.

"I would not think that of him, I assure you! But what I meant is that there should be someone who steps forward and puts an end to the scheming! We should not be afraid of other people's opinions and care more about helping him."

"Yeah well, you're right. But you guys have never been here for more than a full day at a time, right? You've helped us on missions that lasted weeks, but you've never been here for weeks. So you've got to pay attention." Kankuro said.

"Look Lee; you don't need to worry about it much. The way you are, people will probably think you and Tenten are in a relationship." Temari said, glancing at Tenten as she did. Tenten blushed, looking away from her for the first time. Temari arched an eyebrow.

"Actually, they'll think he's a licentious. That's hardly our concern though, as long as it's not directed at Gaara. As for helping Gaara, this is the best way. By going behind his back so he can keep his dignity. If you just run up and go 'Hey, Gaara! Hope you're feeling better! Everyone needs a shoulder to lean on some time, right?' It'll be translated as you offering your help because he can't help himself." Kankuro said.

"Well he can't help himself. This is the kind of problem he needs assistance with. How is that a crime?" Choji's voice said in the darkness.

"It's a 'crime' because there's no point in having a ruler if they're interdependent." Shikamaru spoke up, the faint outline of him turning toward Choji's sound.

"It's the best way. This way, you guys won't have to interact with him as much either." Temari threw in, shrugging one shoulder.

"I do not mind interacting with him." Lee said.

"Ok then, go ahead. As long as your motives are secret." Kankuro huffed, throwing his hands up.

"So who's going to be giving us clearance?" Ino said, leaning against the stone wall. She crossed her arms and blew her bangs out of her face.

"Whatever. I'll do it. The worst they can do is investigate me and Gaara will drop the charges." Kankuro said. He thought for a moment. "Although that would suck, considering it would be really bad for me to be investigated at all."

"Why? You're never going to be Kazekage." Temari spoke with an easy confidence. Kankuro's lack of qualifications were not a secret, or a source of shame. He shrugged.

"Ok then, Kankuro will give us clearance. We'll have to be escorted to where we'll be staying. Should we meet back here?" Tenten said, stepping up to Lee's side. Nearly everyone had moved into the circle of light as the fear of discovery had ebbed away.

"No. I evacuated this guard tower right before you came but it's normally being used. We'll meet in the Botanical Center at eleven. Kankuro should return to the palace immediately."

"Why? My parents aren't home."

She gave him an tired look. "Really, Kankuro?"

He grinned at her. The limited light bounced off his teeth, making them glow in the black cavern of his hood.

"Go outside the village to the southern gate. The guards haven't been evacuated and you can be processed correctly there." Temari said, placing her hands on her hips.

"I'll get back home. Where's Gaara? And Temari, where will you be?" Kankuro said, absentmindedly moving his fingers in the moonlight.

"Gaara's trying to rest and I'm going to raise hell at the Medical Corps. It'll make for a good alibi and reassure anyone who might be tracking my pattern the past few days."

"Good plan." He said, looking over the group. "Any questions?" In the silence he receded back into the shadows and the Leaf slipped out the door, sneaking off one by one. Temari counted eleven heartbeats then went out the back, at the same time Kankuro left through the front door. If any guards had felt the flow of chakra from the Leaf, they would have focused on the guard tower. Had they done that, they would have had their suspicions assured by the siblings leaving at the same time through the different exits. That way, the Leaf would be removed from the equation. Letting a person wonder is more dangerous then giving them something to wonder about in the first place.

The streets near the palace were the widest in Suna. They arched away from the palace on all sides, creating a bubble of space that was almost always clear. There was no law against going near it, or even going inside if you could get past the guards, but since Karura's death and Gaara's birth it became the civilian's instinctual behavior. When Kankuro walked past the nearest building and began to cross the wide open space, he felt a presence in the shadows. He continued to walk, readying a kunai. The man leaned his head away from a stone pillar, in Kankuro's peripheral vision, then quickly ducked away. Kankuro stopped and looked in his direction.

"Are you kidding me? Is that even sneaking around; I just saw you." Kankuro said. The head appeared again, then quickly disappeared. Kankuro pointed a finger in his direction, shouting.

"I'm looking right at you! How stupid do you think I am? The next time your head appears you're getting a kunai between the eyes!"

"Please wait!" Advisor Lin's voice broke out, one hand waving in the darkness.

"Please Lord Kankuro, I must speak with you about urgent business!"

Kankuro rolled his eyes, walking up to the stone pillar. Lin crouched behind it, rubbing his knuckles together. He looked at Kankuro like he was going to make good on his kunai threat.

"What is it, 'Forgive-Me-Foo'? If you're really planning on spying on me then you might want to take some classes on it. Or hire someone with skill to do it."

"It's not that." Lin said, shaking his head rapidly. "I just, I have to warn you. I was told to…" His eyes widened, voice caught. Kankuro tensed watching him, voice coming out meaner then he intended.

"Get to the point. What were you told to do? Kill me? Spy on me?"

Lin looked away, speaking to Kankuro's sandals. "I was told to warn you that… The Anti-Gaara Foundation has relocated their headquarters and we've found it. We have reason to believe that they're attempting to persuade some of the councillors for support so that an opening might be made to-" Kankuro cut him off.

"What good would getting a councillor be? First of all, anyone who even met with a member of their organization should be jailed and more than that any information they want on Gaara they could get by less obvious means. And what councillor would actually attack Gaara head on? What the hell are you telling me this for? What's really going on, Lin?" Kankuro leaned forward, glaring. Lin hunched away, mind-racing.

"I was told that the foreigners in our border are from an allied village but… That one of their members killed the previous Kazekage when he allied with him and that Lord Gaara is repeating that mistake. Also, that the Anti-Gaara Foundation will work very hard to gain their support and… Although this has not been verified, that they may have contacted them before you intercepted them."

"What? That's impossible; I left once they reached the border."

"Well, Lord Kankuro, was the original message sent without being cleared?"

"How do you know about that?" Kankuro said. Lin glanced up at him, forcing himself to straighten up.

"Two teams from an allied village appear right when Lord Gaara's status reached critical point? Not only that but, Lady Temari was intercepting messages."

"So they blamed that on Temari, huh? No, it was me. But who would have misdirected the information to try and target Temari…?" Kankuro said, looking away. His face clouded over with thought. Lin's mouth went dry as he grit his teeth.

Don't admit anything. Let him trap himself.

Kankuro looked at him, misinterpreting his guilty expression.

"Don't worry. The Leaf aren't here to betray Gaara. Believe me. If you tried to convince them to they'd just get mad and argue about it for hours. But tell me honestly Lin, has Temari's behavior caused too much suspicion? Is she being investigated? Because based off what you just told me she's being targeted."

Lin could only shake his head.

"Ok. Make sure the Anti-Gaara Foundation gets the most attention, I know how shrewd Foo can be."

"H-How did you know it was Foo who-"

Kankuro rolled his eyes. "None of the councillors or the jounin respect your position. Only Foo would care to not only clue you in on this, but make you play an active role. Pretty risky, actually. He's either trying to test your loyalty so that it can be further proved to the councillors and get some of the job off his back or he's trying to use you as a tool to mislead Temari, since she'd totally write you off." He said. He turned to walk away. Lin mustered up his courage, buried his loyalty, and spoke.

"Lord Kankuro… They're saying that Lady Temari is using you; that she sent you to the Leaf to look suspicious and that her presence near Lord Gaara is open dissension. Should… Should I know anything?" Kankuro appraised him and once agains misinterpreted his trembling.

"Look Lin, I decided to go out to meet the Leaf-" Lin made a small cry of pain. "-So just drop whatever charges you've got on Temari, ok? And don't tell anyone this next part but…" He leaned toward him. Lin all but leaned away. "I had to make up an alibi. I needed to tell them what to expect when we got here."

"A secret plot…? You two shouldn't-"

"No. We're helping Gaara in the only way those white robes will allow. We're going to be investigating some medical files but I need your help. Can you help me?" Lin's knuckled turned white as he forced his head to nod.

"Good. Help distract Foo from Temari and the Leaf; also help me with pushing a higher clearance for the Leaf. I need them to get to Gaara's medical files."

"… If anyone knew… What you just said. It would be seen as treasonous…."

Kankuro shrugged.

"But it's not. Anyway, I know I can trust you. Also I never really wield my position and I don't want to have to ask Temari how to do it correctly. And to ask Gaara is out of the question. You know how to fill out those forms, right?"

"Yes. I do."

"Great. Carry some on you tomorrow, I'll meet you at eight o'clock in the briefing room." He turned to leave again but Lin's hand reached out and touched his shoulder. Kankuro looked back and gently removed it.

"Are you really that worried? Look, just don't botch this and nobody will know."

Lin looked at him, taking in the details of his face.

"You have always been my favorite, Lord Kankuro. If I could choose, if I had my choice-" The hand Kankuro pushed away reached out again and touched his shoulder. Kankuro was very still.

"-then I would betray both of them before you. Even Lord Gaara. If I had my choice I would protect you above the others." They were silent for a moment as Kankuro's face hardened.

"Then hopefully you won't have to make that choice." He said slowly. He watched as Lin nodded and walked away, stumbling as though he were drunk.

Kankuro considered killing him. He had a heavy feeling, like he had opened up his insides and gave them away. That he had betrayed himself. His mouth burned. He debated until Lin turned the street and went home, following him until he greeted his family and laid down in his bed without dinner; alone. The heavy gutted-out feeling settled into Kankuro's stomach, a stone that weighed him down and leaked anxiety like contaminated rocks leak poison into the soil. What he did not know was that Lin had the same feeling; only he had swallowed the rocks himself. He had taken the rocks from Kankuro and held them in his stomach until he would deliver them to Foo tomorrow, before eight o'clock. But then Kankuro made his worst tactical error of the night; he left Lin alive. Although Lin wasn't a shinobi, he felt him leave. He stared at the ceiling as fat tears leaked down his face. Hot poison from the abundance in his body, that made his stomach churn. He did not sleep, but laid there leaking poison until sunrise.

The living quarters of the palace were dark when Kankuro entered. There were no fires and the cold night air had leeched the day's heat out of the stone walls. He hesitated, listening for anything unusual before continuing inside. When his senses didn't alert him he walked across the entry room, up the stairs, and to the end of the hall. The small sliver of warm light was the only indication that the place wasn't abandoned. He didn't bother knocking, Gaara could sense him well before he entered the house and by his pattern of movement could have long determined his destination. He slid the door open in one smooth movement, slowly closing it behind him. Gaara's room was bright in comparison to the hall, but the light was still dim.

It was as sparse as usual, but the one bed had crumpled sheets and the one table was cluttered. One flickering candle pooled warm wax on it. The wick was a thick coil of grey that ended in a struggling flame. Gaara hunched in the wooden chair, papers stacked on his desk. Kankuro noted that the papers weren't evenly stacked, a few corners stuck out in the piles. The window was still cracked open but the air was thick with Gaara's chakra, a hazardous cloud of defense before his consciousness had to be interrupted, and Gaara was hunching over. Alarms went off in Kankuro's head.

He stayed by the door for a full minute, the only sound the scratching of pen on paper. Finally he walked over and leaned against the side of Gaara's desk, watching him. Gaara stopped writing, turning to him for the first time. By association Kankuro had learned the subtle changes in Gaara's face so that what he saw was only more unsettling. Gaara looked at him steadily but his eyes showed no recognition. His hair line was in odd clumps, from being dampened and dried repeatedly, and the blacks near his eyes were creased and drooping. His skin was paler then usual, with blotchy red marks along his neck and temples. His eyes were bloodshot. And flat. He sat up straighter with some difficulty and Kankuro could almost read the lagging messages go through his head.

Familiar chakra; non-threat

Steady chakra; non-urgent

A small crease appeared between his eyebrow ridges.

Sibling...? Which sibling?

Kankuro felt the cloud of chakra press down on him like fingers, touching at his hood, the shape of the scrolls on his back, and the shape of his face. All the areas that Gaara most distinguished him by. He flexed his fingers on his right hand, meeting the fingertips that prodded him. Recognition slowly dawned on Gaara's face.

"Hey." Kankuro said around the lump in his throat. "What's up, sport?"

"Kankuro." His voice was so coarse Kankuro cringed when he heard it. "You're back."

"Yeah, I am. How are you holding up?" Kankuro said, trying and failing to keep the concern out of his voice. Gaara attempted to shrug. But it was sharp and fast, like he had been pricked in the neck.

"Not better, but I can function. It's hard but…" He trailed off. Kankuro noted how he had not once looked away. Instead, as he spoke, he looked over Kankuro as if seeing him for the first time in years. He checked his eyes, the dirt in his face paint, the shape of his jaw, the frame of his hood. Usually Gaara gave no more than an acknowledging glance at anyone new in the conversation. It's as if they no longer interest him once he's determined their level of threat and position of influence. Kankuro tried to smile at him, but the intense scrutiny made him uncomfortable. He reflexively reached into his pocket for his cleaning rag.

"You should probably sleep, instead of sitting up all night filing paperwork." He said, wiping at his face. He looked down at the table and froze. Gaara looked down too. The page was full of the same line, scribbled over and over in varying degrees of legibility.

I cannot breathe, so drown me. I cannot sleep, so kill me. I cannot breathe, so drown me.

They both read over the entire page. Kankuro's hands began to shake.

"Gaara." He said. Gaara looked up at him, face a mask again. "Have you tried sleeping recently?"

When he didn't get a response he finished wiping off his face then carefully folded the rag and put it back into his pocket. He knelt down until he and his brother were eye level.

"So I know I'm not very good at this but listen: You're killing yourself, you're unraveling. And honestly…? You look like shit. If you are functioning, you're not doing it well." Kankuro's hand tightened on the edge of the desk, as it always did when he spoke to Gaara like he spoke to Temari. He willed his heart to stop racing as Gaara slowly blinked a few times, then opened his mouth. His voice was so hoarse he had to close it again. He looked mildly irritated, rubbing at his throat for a moment. When he took his hand away the red splotches were deeper.

"I know. I can feel it." He put his elbow on the desk, inhaling deeply. He stayed that way for a few moments, eyes never leaving Kankuro's face.

"You want to lay down?" Kankuro said hopefully.

Gaara shook his head, turning away for the first time.

"Ok. Well, maybe something will come up."

"Where did you go this time?" Gaara said.

"Oh, you know me. Gotta get away occasionally. Ran into the desert for a few days, ran back. No big deal."

"I see." He closed his eyes, leaning heavily onto the table. His hand still clutched fistfuls of hair, but trembled.

"If I had brought something back with me, would you be upset?" Kankuro said, nearly whispering, then forcing himself not to.

"What kind of something?" Gaara spoke without moving.

"The kind that helps insomniacs…?" Kankuro replied, watching the fingers in Gaara's hair tighten.

"You brought medicine. That's why you left in the first place."

"Y-yeah."

Gaara's eyes slowly opened, zeroing in on Kankuro's guilty expression.

"… Are you lying?" He said slowly, breathing deeply. There was no accusation in his voice, it was an honest question. Would you lie to me? Would you betray me in my weakened state? Would you rather eat salted port or salted beef?

"What? No! No."

"Ok."

They watched each other until the candle burnt out. Kankuro was surprised at how much of a stranger his brother had become. He was very young after all, with a weak body. Just like all the others born before they finished incubating. Only now the myth that Gaara was immune to illness, fatigue, or anything else that plagued those children was dispersed. Kankuro was paralyzed with a sudden, overwhelming feeling of responsibility. When the light snuffed out he rose and waited. Gaara moved like an elderly man, pulling himself up with visible difficulty.

"You should go to sleep. Really, just lay down and relax. Pretend until the sun rises if you have to." Kankuro said as Gaara swayed in front of him. He nodded, then turned toward the bed. He didn't move, he just looked at it and leaned toward it. But when Kankuro reached out to him, he moved away, laying down with difficulty and exhaling loudly. Kankuro put the papers away, folding the unfinished work. Before he could stop himself he slipped the one he read into his pocket and walked out.

When he opened it and reread it he walked to the kitchen, turning on a burner. He held the paper over it. But just as the corner began to smoke he pulled it away, turned off the burner, and leaned against the counter, reading it.

He walked back to Gaara' room, standing in front of the door listening for noise. Then he walked back down the hall, put on his coat, and began pacing. He continued to wander angrily throughout the palace for over an hour, slamming open a drawer and taking out scissors, almost cutting the paper into pieces before the scissors were thrown so hard onto a table they bounced off. Then tossing his coat angrily onto the couch. Pulling it back on quickly then shoving the paper down into a trash can. Only to fish it out again.

Finally he sat down in front of Gaara's room and rubbed his temples, exhaling loudly. He reread the paper until he had counted the words and memorized the pattern. And waited for Temari to come home.

She arrived not much later then his fit ended, making no attempt to hide her entry. Kankuro heard her come in and was overcome with a sudden panic. He analyzed it but couldn't understand it, shaking as he sat in the darkness. Temari began to climb the stairs. He rose and met her at the end of the hall, hood down and makeup off, so that she saw his full expression. She hesitated, assessing him, then put both hands on her hips.

"What happened?" She said.

He handed her the paper. When she took it the edges were crumpled and the creases had turned soft, like cloth. She read over the whole thing then handed it back. Kankuro waited.

"Is that what you're freaking out about?" She said, moving back down the stairs. Instead of answering her he followed until she began making tea in the kitchen. He watched from the doorway.

"Are you going to answer me or not?" She said as she turned on a burner.

"I don't know why I'm freaking out." He said. She glanced at him, huffing.

"Yes you do. Tell me what you think is making you freak out."

"Gaara."

"Obviously."

"Gaara slowly dying right in front of me."

"Keep trying." She ladled water into the tea pot from the kitchen basin, one hand wielding the ladle so that not a single drop was wasted.

"Gaara's being so young."

"What?" She put the teapot onto the burner with force. The fire shifted as though startled.

"It's just… Have you seen him? He looks like he's shrinking but he's not…? I forget how small he really is, you know, just the because of the way he is. But… But I can see it now. And it's really making me freak out."

"It's scaring you, seeing his limitations."

"No! It's just... I feel like if he can't do what he needs to do, what he wants to do, then what does that mean for us? I saw one time this kid had to carry his little brother away from one of Gaara's attacks. Gaara broke his leg. It, it was something."

"Something…?"

"It was like realizing something only to realize you're really stupid, you know?"

Temari had braced both hands onto the counter as he spoke, staring down at the teapot as though it had offended her.

"Let's just say I don't know." She turned to look at him. "What did you realize?" She said. He made a frustrated sound.

"It's hard to describe. It's like… Are we the villains?"

"… What?!" She faced him, placing one hand on her hip.

"I mean it's like this: In the shows there's always the hero and the villain. The hero has friends that support him and the villain has underlings that just let him do whatever through cowardice or greed or some other reason besides love. Get what I'm saying?" He said, motioning with his hands on occasion. Temari blinked once. Slowly.

"No. I don't." She said. Kankuro threw his hands up, groaning. He stared at them for a moment, before crossing his arms and staring at the flame on the burner.

"When we were younger I let Gaara do things because I couldn't do anything about it. If I could have stopped him; if I could have killed him I would have. But now, I think it's kinda still like that. He obviously needs help but in order to give it to him we have to sneak around and stick our necks way out. And honestly? I don't know if he'll keep them from getting chopped." He said, tensing.

"It's like we're just as useless now as we were then. It doesn't matter how hard we try, we'll never be strong enough to go one-on-one with Gaara. So we can't really stop him from doing whatever the hell he wants."

He sighed heavily, looking up at his sister. She noted how tired he looked, how resigned.

"How can I love him if he just keeps being the villain?" He said.

Temari kept her face calm, the only indication of her shift in mood was her thinned lips. Kankuro watched her. Taking in the four, tight ponytails he used to tug with chakra strings, her wider hips and thinner waist that boys used to tease her over and now men fell over themselves for, the scar on her neck from the time she tried keeping senbon in her hair. He saw the eyes their uncle had claimed was their mother's but are entirely her own. Too cold, too sharp for a warm memory to still possess. He felt the familiar tug of affection, like a string, that connected his heart to his sister's. It went left unsaid, because they said it everyday with the forms they carried and the way they carried them. He saw his history in his sister and loved her for it. He spoke as though in a trance, the words formed in his mouth as soon as they formed in his head.

"I think I love Gaara, but I wish I didn't. I wish I could just let him die. Or let him live his life the way he wants to without giving a damn either way. But love is selfish, you know? You only love someone because of how it affects you."

"That's the only way we know. But maybe you found another way."

"Do you love him?" He asked softly. Temari's hand tightened on the countertop. She held his gaze but her look was sharper, colder. She was really thinking. She felt the urge to say 'yes, of course' but wasn't sure how it would sound coming out. She didn't know if she would believe herself.

The teapot whistled.

"I'm going to bed after this. You should too." She said as she poured out a cup of hot water. Kankuro watched her for a few moments, then walked back up the stairs. He paused before making the turn to his room, then went straight to Gaara's door. He listened for anything, any stirrings from a nightmare, but it was quiet.

"Gaara?" He knocked once, then went inside. He moved to the bed quickly. His eyes hadn't adjusted yet but he couldn't hear or sense Gaara's presence. He waited at the bedside, reaching out. He touched warm sheets. The window was still open.

"Dammit!" He shouted as he turned and ran back down the hall. He found Temari on the couch, looking toward him.

"Gaara's gone." He said quickly. She narrowed her eyes at him.

"He probably went wandering. Are you scared he'll be attacked?"

"No. Well yes, there's that. But I'm scared he'll collapse of chakra exhaustion and die! He looked like hell; he shouldn't be exerting effort wandering."

"Calm down. If he collapses his body will regenerate its chakra and the Leaf are here so the chances of him being attacked are lowered drastically. Let him wander, it'll be good for him." She said as she held up her cup of tea. She blew on it and sipped. Kankuro looked from her to the door. He heard her loud groan as he rushed down the stairs to the base floor.

Author's Note: So I would have put a note into every chapter but haven't figured out how to do it. Now I'll just put them at the end in the body of the story until I do, so please bear with me.

This chapter is a lot to take in so I apologize but I felt like the story was moving a bit slowly. I have trouble with pacing, as well as a few other things, so I'd appreciate reviews. Actually, reviews would be wonderful. If you have any questions I'll answer those too.

As for the story, well, I'm trying to keep it in the timeline between Naruto Shippuden Season One and Season Two. It's supposed to fit into canon, which is why Naruto isn't with the teams chosen to go on this mission. Also because I can't stand Naruto.

Oh and one last thing: The Anti-Gaara Foundation is real you can find it in the main show under the arc The New Chunin Exams.