A/N: Thanks again to everyone who is reading this. I hope you continue to enjoy the journey. Remember, if there's anything you love, hate, whatever, please comment and review.
Within the next few chapters, I will be switching perspectives as Kaidan travels because I want to show more of the changes in the world wrought by the Reapers. This will be a "and meanwhile" sort of deal. Or I may just write that as a side story. I don't know just yet; we'll see what my muse does.
It's a little shorter than typical, but I feel that the next relationship that I want to touch on deserves its own chapter, so this is more of a bridge than anything else.
Departure
She sat naked at the table except for her underwear and a long towel wrapped around her wet hair. The warm shower had been good, but it made her realize just how tired she was from the day's events. She rested her weary head on one fist, the rest of her clothes bunched up in her lap. Hackett, her mom, Kaidan shipping out, Hackett again, the refugees, her mom again, missing Kaidan already; all these thoughts raced through her tired mind. She closed her eyes in an attempt to shut it all down. She had drifted off and did not hear the quiet closing of the door. She jumped as a large warm hand gently caressed her shoulder.
"I didn't mean to startle you." Kaidan's voice was soft, deep with concern. She looked up and met his tired brown eyes. She gave him a tired smile.
"It's fine. Just..." she yawned. "It's been a long day." His face erupted in an understanding smile.
"That is an understatement." She felt her breath quicken as he slipped his hand in hers and sat down across from her. It caught slightly as he brushed her wrist with his lips. She loved his touch.
"Hackett told me I should move." she blurted out, breaking the spell he was weaving over her but she had to tell him.
"What?" He froze, still holding her hand to his cheek.
"Don't worry, I told him where he could shove it." she yawned again.
"Good." He kissed her wrist again.
"I promised I wouldn't leave you, and that's a promise I intend to keep this time." she felt his lips curl up in a smile against her palm.
"How long until you leave?" she asked quietly.
"About an hour."
"Not much time then."
"No."
She moved to his chair and crawled into his lap, resting her head on his shoulder, nuzzling her nose against the pulse in his neck. His arms wrapped around her, squeezing her tightly against him.
"So, what do you want to do for an hour?"
His soft laughter vibrated deep in his chest. He slid his arm beneath her knees and picked her up. He laid her gently on the bed before laying down next to her and gathering her in his arms.
"Not enough time to do what I want, so I think I'll just lay here and hold you for a while."
She smiled against his chest before closing her eyes and letting his heartbeat lull her to sleep.
She woke to an empty bed and the sun streaming in through a window. A light on her omni-tool flashed indicating that she had messages—one from Liara, one from Doctor Chakwas, and one from Kaidan. She read the one from Kaidan first, which simply said that he loved her and would call her as often as he could. The messages from Liara and Doctor Chakwas both asked if she was free today; Chakwas wanted to proceed with the implant removal and start hormone therapy, while Liara was hoping that they could meet for lunch to discuss some of the current ideas floating around about jumpstarting the mass relays. She didn't know how much help she would be for Liara, so she made arrangements to meet with her the following day as she headed to meet with Doctor Chakwas.
"Shepard." Chakwas greeted her cheerfully.
"Doctor. You seem to be in a good mood this morning."
"Well, yes, we had a bit of a breakthrough engineering dextro-amino foods. It's not the one we were hoping for, but it is still significant."
"Yeah, that's great news."
"Anyway, let's get that implant out of you."
The procedure was simple and barely required an incision. The hormone shots afterward, however, was far more unpleasant. It was a battery of injections in various locations with what she determined could only be called 'needles of doom'. Chakwas explained that the injections were bathing her organs with the appropriate hormones to stimulate a reaction and hopefully a resumption of a cycle. It just felt like fire eating her from the inside out.
"The procedure is common in those who chose to reverse a more permanent form of birth control." Chakwas elaborated. "However, with all that your body has gone through, I still want to check for some permanent scarring."
"And how would you be doing that, Doc?"
"Well, the Normandy has the most advanced med scanners in the area." She felt herself stiffen a bit, which did not go unnoticed. "I've already arranged for transportation. We should be there and back a little before dinner time."
The doctor helped her up and to the waiting vehicle.
"How's Joker?" she asked. "Kaidan told me he refuses to leave the ship."
The doctor stared out of a window for a few minutes, sadness and frustration gliding over her features.
"Joker has been... problematic, since EDI's... death. I've got some of the old crew checking on him every couple of days to make sure he hasn't done something stupid."
"Stupid how?"
"Well, in the first week after the Reapers fell, he decided to climb onto the nose of the ship and jump off. Shattered his legs and feet."
She winced at the thought.
I am so very sorry, Joker. She thought. He had been one of her best friends, stuck with her through thick and thin. He followed her through hell and brought them out through the other side.
What right did I have to take away his happiness for my own? Her guilt echoed, bubbling up inside her like the rotten sludge at the bottom of a lake, forgotten until it gets stirred up, when it rises to the surface.
"How... How did EDI die?" she could feel the uncertainty in her voice, and she knew that this would not be an easy trip to the ship that had been home.
"She went quickly. As soon as the ship was engulfed, she just... shut down. The thing is the basic VI program is still there, but..."
"But it's not EDI."
"It's not EDI." the doctor said as the blue and white hull of the Normandy came into view.
Note: I really feel like Shepard dealing with Joker is going to need its own chapter. Might take a while to update because I fear it's going to be one of those heart wrenching things to write.
